I’m Sick of the Kind Protagonist, so I Might as Well Just Die - Chapter 62
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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#62
Perenustus gazed upward in a daze at the heads of Leonas and Aurelia, displayed side by side on the gallows.
‘What possible meaning could there be in this death…?’
It was not a question born from ignorance. I knew well that these were people I could meet again once I ended the world and returned to my office. And yet, knowing this, I could not tear my eyes away from the droplets of blood falling from the severed neck, nor from the dark pool where that blood had gathered.
The world spinning in a direction entirely contrary to my design was not merely unfamiliar—it was abhorrent. Simultaneously, the keen, glittering gaze of the Ancient Gods, who seemed to relish this strange turn of events, filled me with revulsion.
▶ [Observation Alert] Creator’s anguish detected!
The Third Existence and the Seventh Existence laugh uproariously.
The Eleventh Existence scores the Creator’s expression!
The First Existence mocks!
The Fifth Existence and the Ninth Existence add chaos to the world!
The moment the status window erupted in a kaleidoscope of colors, the Palace Square and the Imperial Palace descended into pandemonium.
Scarcely had the transformed mob begun their murderous assault when the terrified nobility became a pitiful sight, their brilliant silk garments billowing as they fled. I observed the crude spectacle as though watching a shabby theatrical performance—jewelry and ornate wigs tumbling across the ground, masterless gems glinting meaninglessly beneath my feet.
“Seize them! These are the ones who should have their necks in nooses!”
Those who moments before had denounced Aurelia as a traitor now scrambled to erase their own station, pretending they were never nobility. The Knights, who had reflexively wielded their blades, lost their resolve before boys and girls who threw themselves upon the swords, their shoulders sagging in defeat.
“To the Imperial Palace!”
“Chase them!”
I stood motionless in the center of the chaos, like a withered tree rooted in place as a tidal wave swept past. Only after the masses that had filled the square surged into the Imperial Palace’s Garden and beyond its walls did I approach Aurelia’s corpse, abandoned and headless.
My garment grew heavy, soaked through with her crimson blood. Her hair, always meticulously arranged, lay disheveled across her cheek, yet I could not bring myself to brush it away.
‘Why am I… what am I doing this for…?’
A single sentence circled endlessly through my mind. I could not comprehend what purpose this chaos served. I understood well enough why events had unfolded this way, yet I could not accept that the transformation was worth the sacrifice of lives.
My hand slowly traced down Aurelia’s back. Only when I heard the Ancient Gods’ mocking laughter did I realize my own hands were trembling.
“This man is the Grand Duke! This man is the Imperial Princess’s lover! He killed our lady and the Grand Duke—it was all his doing!”
The moment the youthful voice pierced toward me, the crowd closed in. I accepted the vivid curses spewed by these extras who had never held any value to me, and smiled bitterly.
“I thought all the foolish beasts had stampeded toward the Imperial Palace.”
“You would abandon the one who gave you your name?”
Mure, her voice sharp with accusation, raised the weapon she gripped with all her might. In the girl’s eyes, clutching an object barely worthy of being called a weapon, burned hatred and resolve.
“Ah, a name…. That’s right. My destiny did commit such reckless acts.”
Perenustus held Aurelia more firmly in his blood-stained embrace and fixed his gaze upon Mure. He regarded her for a long moment with a gaze tinged with strange longing and welcome before asking softly.
“Yes, child who has gained the fate of a guardian. What is it that you wish to do?”
“What!”
“I am asking what you now wish to do.”
“I will sever your head and hang it from that pole! And I will wash the lady clean and bury her with the Grand Duke!”
“Is that your will, or merely words you have memorized and repeat from what others cry out?”
“Of course it is my own will, born from what I have witnessed and decided for myself, you abominable wretch! Because the lady gave me such a name!”
At that answer, a satisfied smile finally bloomed across Perenustus’s lips. Mure’s eyes widened at the sight of his laughter.
“You laugh?”
“I must laugh. That answer itself proves how worthwhile a choice my destiny has made.”
With a sense of relief, Perenustus hesitated only briefly before entrusting Aurelia’s body to Mure.
“Now, show the worth of your name.”
I accepted the crude fury poured upon me entirely with my own body. I could have reduced them all to dust with but a single wielding of administrative authority, yet I did not.
‘The creatures’ first gift of free will naturally belongs to me, their Creator.’
Perenustus let out a faint laugh at a sense of clarity he had never felt before in his entire existence, and accepted death as an ordinary human would.
▶ [Observation Alert] Creator’s voluntary acceptance of death detected!
The Ninth Existence trembles with joy!
The Fourth Existence cannot accept the current situation and has abandoned observation!
The Eleventh Existence rages!
Bilateia, who had been staring at the status window flickering alternately in red, green, and white, turned her body and entered the Palace.
“The Imperial Princess is fleeing!”
Shouts and screams followed closely at the back of Bilateia’s head. She wasn’t trying to escape the chaos. She simply needed a space where she could think quietly for a moment. She wanted to distance herself from the hostile clamor, from the smell of blood, from all the gazes.
The Attendants who had been fleeing screamed upon encountering her and ran in the opposite direction. They would undoubtedly go announce that the Imperial Princess was there and beg for their lives, but Bilateia didn’t even consider stopping them.
‘Insane…. I’ve come here.’
Without intending to, she had walked straight to Leonas’s Office. Biting her lip, she swallowed hard and pushed open the door.
Before the impeccably organized surroundings, Leonas’s scent greeted her first. Bilateia gazed at the chamber as if its master had only just been sitting there, then approached the desk with heavy footsteps. There, as if waiting for her arrival, she discovered a single sheet of paper.
To my dearest rival and companion,
Familiar handwriting welcomed her on the neatly folded paper. Bilateia unfolded it with trembling hands.
I must first declare that this letter is the pride of one who has achieved their wish.
In truth, my real wish was to marry you.
After reading only two lines, her eyes squeezed shut. Unable to muster the courage to read the next line, Bilateia opened her eyes again with a sigh as the shouts drew ever closer.
They say to dream big, but I could never bring myself to wish for something as simple as cherishing and loving you with me, growing old together. Was it because I knew it was an impossible dream and wasn’t foolish enough to harbor it anyway, or because there was a value I simply could not abandon?
While pondering the useless answer to this question, I changed my mind and decided to offer you a final farewell instead.
In this life, I have married you. In the next life, I hope to experience cherishing you. In the life after that, perhaps loving you. And someday in the distant future, finally growing old together with you. I await that day.
With each death, I draw closer to the next wish, bit by bit. Thinking of it this way, death feels joyful and something to look forward to.
So I ask that you do not blame yourself for my death, nor consider it your fault. If anything, I only hope that you alone will live long and well.
To speak more honestly, I willingly offered my neck to your desire—please witness clearly how I achieve victory through death. A witness to a world where something absolute has crumbled. There is no one in this world but you capable of bearing such a magnificent title.
No matter what I gave, even if it were my own neck, I would not regret it because that someone is you.
Your rival and companion, with respect and love.
Bilateia read the words on the paper again and again, like a child learning to read for the first time. When the growing commotion drew near to the door, she lifted her head and gazed at the ceiling.
‘This damned fool, what? Hoping I’ll live long and well?’
Bilateia smiled crookedly and traced that single line with her finger. Like a rock that lives for a thousand years, speaking of the next life, the life after that, and some distant day while celebrating victory—she wanted to strike this infuriating man across the back.
‘Why are tears flowing, damn it.’
Without realizing it, Bilateia roughly wiped away the liquid that had wetted her cheeks with the back of her hand. Yet the letter in her grasp, she could not bring herself to crumple. In the next instant, faces twisted with a mixture of rage and hope burst through the door.
“How rude.”
“What?!”
“No matter how poorly you’ve lived, haven’t you even learned the courtesy of visiting someone else’s home?”
Bilateia touched the ornate golden crown resting on her head with her hand and shook her head.
“I suppose. Given such a pathetic level, my husband must have caused all this commotion saying he would feed and educate creatures like you.”
“….”
She smiled mockingly and removed the crown, hanging it on her index finger. The crown spun round and round at the tip of her index finger like a toy, then fell with a clear metallic ring, rolling at the feet of the crowd. Mure, who watched and wondered what this could possibly mean, furrowed her brow and asked.
“Are you… begging for your life…?”
“Ha! Me? To creatures like you?”
Bilateia Fernichiosa Venisike let out a scoff of exasperation, shaking her head firmly while lifting her chin with defiant pride.
“I have not surrendered. My foolish husband merely asked me, as his wife, to witness with my own eyes how a kingdom functions when both royalty and nobility have vanished—and I am simply honoring that earnest plea. Do you understand?”
Those who failed to grasp her meaning blinked rapidly, exchanging bewildered glances with one another. Then, one by one, their eyes widened as if struck by lightning. It was at that very moment.
▶ [Stage Conclusion Notification] Observation is terminating!
Observation concludes as all Existences withdraw!
Creator emergency summon request initiated
The instant the termination was declared, Bilateia Fernichiosa Venisike’s consciousness began to blur. She clenched her teeth and glared desperately at her status window.
‘Just a little longer—merely a little more—and the world Leonas dreamed of would finally begin! How can it end like this, merely because the Gods have lost interest?!’
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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