I’m Sick of the Kind Protagonist, so I Might as Well Just Die - Chapter 16

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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#16
‘Why does Rowan sacrifice everything she has and doesn’t have for someone like him? It’s maddening.’
I, who had deemed it foolish love, froze as though struck, drawing a sharp breath.
‘Ah… damn it. To others, I must look just as foolish worrying about the villagers as I think Rowan is for her devotion.’
In that moment, certainty crystallized within me—why I had come to this world, why I endured death’s endless cycle.
‘Rowan and I are alike. We’ve both made decisions that appear hopelessly foolish in others’ eyes, especially.’
Now I could finally comprehend why the system had imprisoned me here.
‘Regardless of what others think, my own judgment is the only standard that matters. I need to shed every last regret to move forward unburdened.’
Grasping this crucial thread at last, I closed my eyes and delved deeper into Rowan’s emotions—those I had grown weary of, and the remnants of desires she kept so carefully concealed.
My assumption that only happy moments with Damian lay hidden proved spectacularly wrong.
‘How unexpected… these tastes.’
Pretty ribbons, soft fabrics, glittering ornaments. All manner of delicate, adorable, utterly useless things were buried in the deepest recesses of Rowan’s heart. Sweet foods too—not filling, merely beautiful and delightful.
‘…So that’s why you loved Damian.’
My thought displeased me, and my heart clenched sharply. I gripped it back just as fiercely.
Someone lunged from the darkest corner of the Alley, seizing my arm and dragging me into the Dark Space—a void identical to where Leonas had taken me at the Training Stage, utterly empty.
“Who is it? Leonas?”
“This! You mistake a being as magnificent as me for some Academy dropout?”
A dull pain struck my forehead. Covering it with my hand and squinting into the murk, I glimpsed something faintly luminous—scales.
“Oh. It really is Silpi.”
“Of course it’s Silpi—is there a fake Silpi? What do you take the great Silverdragoon for!”
“….”
“Anyway! You—those brats told you to escape to this Dark Space if things went south, didn’t they!”
“Yeah.”
Silpi froze, mouth agape, apparently not expecting such a straightforward answer. After a moment of silence, her voice alone rang out, shrill and irritable.
“But why! Why are you holding out!”
“It seemed worth trying?”
“What?”
“If I die once more, just one more time, I think I might finally understand. The competitive spirit seized me.”
“Damn it! Because of you, Ren is becoming incredibly, incredibly sensitive! Do you understand!”
I wanted to snap back that I had no way of knowing that, but I wisely held my tongue. My silence proved correct—Silpi clicked her tongue and revealed herself.
“You know you can’t escape this world no matter how many times you die, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Ren’s been trying every method imaginable to send the top students in, but they can’t enter!”
This revelation startled me. If even the creator or administrator couldn’t traverse its boundaries, this world was fundamentally, profoundly broken.
“I only managed to slip in because that brat Leonas told me about this Dark Space. I wedged myself through a crack, so I don’t know when I’ll be ejected. It’s unsettling.”
“I see.”
“This is no time for leisurely ‘I see’! What exactly have you done?”
“What could I have done? I barely understand what this world even is yet.”
“Yeah, looking at your expression, you clearly know absolutely nothing! Ugh!”
Silpi tore at her hair and sighed.
“I’m going insane! What are you, really? Even Ren says he’s never seen anything like this. It’s as if this world won’t let you go! Like you’re a hostage!”
“…The world?”
“Yes! A creation defying its creator’s will—can you believe it?”
“…So what? Children don’t listen to their parents either. That’s just how it is.”
Silpi opened her mouth to shout something, then spun in circles, dissolving into hysteria. I watched the headless dragon succumb to her nature and thrash about, confirming my suspicion was correct.
‘There’s no way around it. I have to fulfill Rowan’s true wish. That’s the only way to escape this world.’
I waited for Silpi to catch her breath as she rolled about, displaying every facet of her temperament, then quietly voiced my thoughts.
“Listen. I’ve been thinking things through in here too, in my own way.”
“You shouldn’t do that! My curse makes everything happen opposite to your will!”
“That’s exactly why you should listen. This isn’t my will—it’s the will of this body’s owner.”
Silpi, who had been ranting moments before, seemed to find the logic sound enough to close her mouth. For the first time, she straightened her head properly and faced me directly.
“Fine. What is this body’s owner’s will?”
“A very delicate, complicated person who died with far too many things left undone. So I thought I’d spend the remaining week fulfilling everything this body’s owner wanted to do, one by one.”
“Hmm.”
“I’ll say it again—this isn’t what I want. It’s the body’s owner’s wish.”
“I get it, so what is this person’s wish?”
I silently thanked Rowan for her tiresome, unrequited love—for it was this very persuasion technique I was employing now.
It was true. This was the very method Damian used when manipulating Rowan. That bastard had a natural talent for shirking responsibility by pretending his intentions were someone else’s.
‘Even dog shit has its uses, I suppose. There’s something to learn even from someone like Damian.’
I let out an inward scoff while keeping my expression serious as I faced Silpi.
“The wish is a secret.”
“Hey….”
“But this time, I’m certain I can die and escape. If you help me out just a little.”
“…What do I need to do?”
“Give me money. A lot of it.”
“…What?”
Silpi frowned and looked at me. I stared at the dragon floating in midair with nothing but her head, and suddenly realized a crucial fact. I clicked my tongue.
“Ah, sorry. You don’t have any money, do you?”
“Why wouldn’t I have money! Hey, do you not know what a Dragon Lair is? What poor dragon exists?”
“Do you have money right now? No, you don’t. The Dragon Lair is back in our homeland, and since everything melted from your blood, the jewels melted too.”
“….”
“If you don’t have money, then give me some of your scales. No matter which world it is, dragon scales sell for a high price, don’t they?”
“Wow, are you insane!”
Silpi cursed and retreated as if fed up. I didn’t even bother following her—I simply waved my right hand and summoned Basilect.
“You know Basilect is originally a dragon-slaying sword, right? I’ll cleanly take just three scales, so keep your eyes closed for a moment. Actually, five.”
Silpi made a face of utter displeasure as she glared at Basilect.
“When did you get so skilled at wielding a holy sword? You must have acquired it right before entering this world.”
“I’ve died three times here. By the fourth life, everyone should be able to do this much.”
I shrugged and reshaped Basilect into a short dagger form. Silpi, who had been watching me with a frown, sighed and vanished.
Moments later, she returned carrying a large leather pouch in her mouth. She tossed it to me, and it landed with considerable weight.
“Oh. Thanks. And one more thing.”
“What! I’m not giving you scales!”
“No, I’m not asking for anything like that. I’m just curious if the total tragedy quota has filled up much. Tell me how full it is.”
“Not at all.”
“Not filled at all?”
“It’s not completely empty, but… like, this much?”
Silpi squeezed her eyes shut until her eyelids nearly touched. I, who had been secretly hopeful, abandoned all my composure and lunged at Silpi.
“That’s all it filled? How is that possible? I died three times! How much did it hurt!”
“Yeah. That’s why Ren is going insane. The results are too meager compared to the effort.”
“That’s strange… My heart throbbed quite often, didn’t it? Doesn’t the tragedy quota fill up even more when I’m miserable or feel wronged?”
“According to Ren, it’s not your emotions. The emotions remaining in that body apparently don’t count.”
I frowned deeply. Silpi mirrored my expression and sighed.
“Anyway, just so you know. Ren didn’t abandon you—he’s having an absolute meltdown, spreading out all sorts of data like a madman.”
“I know. Your master may not be a particularly good person, but at least he doesn’t seem like the type of trash who would throw someone into a strange world and abandon them.”
My answer seemed unexpected, as Silpi narrowed her eyes and looked me up and down.
“Why?”
“Nothing. Just… please escape this time-”
Silpi didn’t finish her sentence before dissolving into the darkness. I stood holding the heavy pouch in my hand, gazing obliquely at where Silpi had vanished, then turned away.
One week remained.
It was slightly insufficient time to give Rowan everything she desired without a single regret.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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