Grab the Regressor by the Collar and Debut - Chapter 489

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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489. I’m Not That Kind of Person 2 (1)
In truth, during the journey here.
I had conjured up more words than grains of sand on a beach, only to erase them repeatedly.
‘How should I even begin?’
Since my birth on this earth, I had never once been at a loss for words in any moment—or so I had always believed. Yet even I found myself clumsy when it came to reconciliation with a friend. Worse still, when I didn’t even know if that friend wanted to reconcile with me, it became infinitely more difficult.
“Do-ha.”
“…Yeah.”
So in this moment, the fact that I had finally settled on what to say first was both a blessing and a curse.
After all, I had come to seek reconciliation with a friend with whom I’d maintained a cold war for nearly a month, and the first thing I said was….
“So why did you change the password…?”
…exactly that.
Once I broke the ice, the rest came easily.
With disappointment filling my eyes, I practically cried out in frustration.
“How could you, how could you change the password…? No, I understand changing it. But how could you not give me even the slightest hint? Did you really not think for a second that I might come into this studio?”
“…No, Ha-jin. It’s not like that, it’s just that….”
“Honestly, I know we haven’t been the same for nearly a month now, or well, almost over a month at this point. But still, how could you change the password…?”
“That’s why, the thing is….”
“Were we really completely done with each other? Weren’t we implicitly thinking that we were in the middle of some character development arc—where friends turn their backs on each other for growth, but eventually reunite after gaining wisdom on our own journeys, understanding each other better and building an even stronger friendship? Was I the only one thinking that? Is that what this is?!”
“….”
At this point, calling it mere “words” felt inadequate.
It was a bomb, pure and simple. An emotional explosion of my entire being expressing how hurt I felt.
Knowing this, Lee Do-ha, who had initially tried to offer excuses with trembling lips, eventually just placed both fists firmly on his knees and lowered his head about fifteen degrees, waiting for me to finish.
It was only when I straightened my posture and began pouring out my true feelings as if I had come fully prepared that Do-ha’s head moved for the first time.
“Yeah, honestly! You were disappointed in me, you were hurt! I get it! I understand! I think it’s justified! I couldn’t manage my body properly, I didn’t trust you! I was terrified at the suggestion to write a song, and yet I couldn’t even encourage you when you said you wanted to try! So it makes sense that you’d be upset with me…!”
“What?”
“…Huh?”
As Do-ha lifted his bowed head sharply to question me, his gaze was so piercing that I momentarily lost my nerve.
But Lee Do-ha, as if my cowardice meant nothing to him, only sharpened his already keen eyes further, pressing me for answers.
“What did you just say?”
“What did I say? I’ve said so much just now, which part are you…?”
“Just now. Right now. What did I do to you?”
“No, I mean, I didn’t trust you… so, you’d be… upset?”
“Not that.”
“Uh… I couldn’t manage my body, so, you….”
“Before that.”
“You were… upset…?”
“Earlier than that.”
“Uh uh…. Oh, that, you were disappointed in me―.”
“Huh?”
“Huh…?”
Bewildered voices echoed through the air, born from their mutual incomprehension.
Ha-jin, who had somehow lost control of the conversation to Do-ha, blinked awkwardly with his eyes full of question marks.
Kang Ha-jin opened his mouth stupidly, his face tense.
“What, what is—”
“Why…?”
“Huh?”
“Why would I be disappointed in you?”
“…No?”
“Why?”
“We fought, didn’t we?”
“…Did we?”
“What?”
“Um…?”
“Um um um↗?”
What kind of conversation was this?
As they went in circles, exchanging nothing but question marks, the two same-aged friends fell deeper into confusion.
“…”
“…”
“…”
“…”
A suffocating silence,
pupils trembling faintly,
an instinct that something had gone terribly wrong.
Between the two people, separated by a distance as vast as the emotional chasm between them, someone’s face—a living sculpture crafted by the divine and born of humanity—seemed to flicker past at about 70% opacity, shouting “hilarious!” but…
“…”
“…”
Regardless, that wasn’t what mattered to either of them right now!
“…I…”
From within that silence, Lee Do-ha struggled to speak.
His wandering gaze revealed just how flustered he truly was.
‘Lee Do-ha, the legendary, flustered? Flustered!?’
If Destiny had seen this, they might have rushed off to plant an apple tree, wondering if the world was ending tomorrow.
Lee Do-ha, still tilting his head in confusion, continued slowly.
“I actually…”
“…?”
“I thought you’d be angry with me, Ha-jin.”
With both hands clasped respectfully on his knees, Lee Do-ha spoke with genuine caution.
It was a face much like the one Kang Ha-jin had worn thirty minutes ago when he arrived at the studio entrance, deliberating whether to enter the code or ring the doorbell.
Kang Ha-jin’s expression became even more vacant as he recognized his friend’s sincerity.
“…Wha wha wha wha wha wha wha wha↗!?”
What on earth is all this nonsense!?
Then who the hell have I been fighting this whole time!?!?!?
It was only now that Kang Ha-jin realized he had spent nearly a month shadow boxing alone while gripping a wall, and his anguished cry reverberated loudly beyond the studio.
* * *
In order to understand this entire situation accurately, one first needed a fundamental understanding of the person Lee Do-ha.
-A son! It’s a son!
His father, a former athlete who had never truly shone during his active career, eagerly awaited the child who would open the second act of his life.
Lee Do-ha already had two older siblings, and his second sister, who was exactly eight years his senior, had displayed exceptional athletic talent from childhood. Unfortunately, his father was a man trapped in outdated, frustratingly conservative thinking.
-What’s a girl doing playing sports? If she gets her face injured roughhousing, what about her marriage prospects?
-What are you talking about? Is marriage the only endpoint for a woman’s life? If she wants to marry, she marries. If not, she doesn’t. Why won’t you let her develop her talent properly instead of opposing it!?
-That’s what you say now. But do you really think you’ll feel the same when she’s thirty or forty? Playing sports with short hair, looking like a tomboy. What’s that about?
-What do you mean? It’s just self-management for an athlete. Anyway, I’m going to let Do-hee, Do-yeon, and Do-ha do whatever they want! You’re trying to live vicariously through your children? I absolutely won’t stand for it!
-Quiet! I’m making Do-ha an athlete! What do you know, muttering away… Do-ha has talent! Later, when he wins medals, do you know how much pension that brings in!?
It was only much later, through his older sister, that he learned the reason his mother—who had maintained economic independence through university and employment even during difficult times—had never divorced his father was because of Do-ha.
She would have left immediately if she could, but his father said if they divorced, he would only let her take the daughters and would not give up Do-ha.
The thought of Do-ha growing up alone with his father was simply unbearable to her.
-Again! Get up, quickly! Who’s lying on the ground for ten seconds!?
-…Yes, sir.
Lee Do-ha had tried every sport imaginable growing up.
Starting with major sports like soccer, baseball, and basketball, he learned taekwondo, kendo, judo, mixed martial arts, and even a bit of jujitsu, searching for the discipline that suited his talent best.
Taekwondo proved to be his greatest natural fit.
Rather than sparring, which required striking an opponent, he found joy in the process itself—disciplining himself through training and cultivating his mental health. While others doing taekwondo would stretch their legs to learn kicks, Do-ha was always the one diligently practicing poomsae alone.
-What’s the point of taekwondo anyway? What, you’ll just open a dojo and become an instructor? Did you think I was pushing so hard just to see you become a mere instructor?
Unfortunately, in his father’s view, taekwondo simply did not exist as a viable path.
Eventually, Do-ha became a soccer player—the sport in which he had shown the second-most talent.
-That’s right, that’s right! Pass! Pass!!! Ah!!! Hey! How can you lose the ball there!?
Kicking a ball was not difficult.
Running across the vast field throughout the match was not particularly taxing either,
and even amid the chaos of play, tracking players’ positions and thinking several moves ahead was not exhausting.
What was truly difficult for Lee Do-ha was something else entirely.
-Pass! Pass! I said pass! Is it really that hard? You all get so excited and lose your minds when the goal is right in front of you!?
-After running so hard, breathing so heavily, doing everything right—if we end up losing on a counterattack, whose loss is it really? We need to defend! If we score one goal and they score two right after, that one goal means absolutely nothing.
Meaninglessness.
Everything built up becoming worthless.
The distance I ran, the breath I expelled, the sweat I shed—all of it rendered useless.
That was what truly terrified Lee Do-ha.
-Older sister.
-Hmm? Do-ha, what is it?
His second sister ultimately never became a soccer player.
She had abandoned her career path early upon realizing just how narrow and impossible a path it was to live as a female soccer player in Korea.
His father, who had sworn never to let his daughter play sports, was inwardly hurt by his older sister’s decision. When she said she was quitting soccer, he drank for over a week.
And from the very next day, he became even more obsessed with Do-ha’s athletic career.
-I’m sorry.
-…What? Do-ha, what did you say?
-…Never mind.
Mother, Father, Do-ha’s Older Sister, Do-ha’s Second Sister.
None of them ever said it was Do-ha’s fault that his younger sister quit soccer, yet somehow Do-ha felt as though it was all because of him.
His talented sister had given up soccer simply because she was a girl, while I continued playing soccer—something I was merely adequate at—simply because I was a boy.
-Do-ha, I know you probably don’t want to hear this, but….
-No, it’s fine.
-…?
-Please, just speak freely. I don’t mind.
So Lee Do-ha resolved to accept all feedback directed at him willingly.
He had to excel.
If he had been granted this privilege in someone else’s stead, then he had to prove its worth.
-If my abilities are lacking, I can develop myself and prove it. So please, tell me.
Until finally, using a minor injury as an excuse, he defied his father for the first time and quit sports.
He became absorbed in music, learning from his Do-ha’s Older Sister’s boyfriend, who was in a hip-hop club at the time, and when the first mix tape he created with his brother’s help gained considerable recognition in the underground hip-hop scene.
Even when Yoon Ji-nu from Yupia heard that mix tape, became interested, informed the company, and Lee Do-ha received his first trainee offer from Miro.
Lee Do-ha was fine with it all.
No matter how lacking or inferior someone’s skills were compared to his own, he never dismissed their advice or counsel.
After doing sports for so long, there were many times when he didn’t understand what coaches and directors said, yet simply had to follow their instructions. It wasn’t particularly difficult.
-Do-ha, you….
-…?
-You really don’t pay attention to those around you, do you? Is it because no one satisfies you?
-Me…?
-In the Special Class, you barely exchange words with anyone except Si-woo and Tae-hyun. Well, maybe Eun-chan?
-Is that so?
Communication with his teammates had never been easy.
Well, you could say he simply didn’t mesh well with the other boys his age who did sports together.
While his peers around him threw themselves passionately into soccer, Do-ha—who did it simply because his father told him to—had different interests from the start.
-Well…. It’s not that I dislike them or anything.
When they watched legendary soccer match compilations of overseas players every day and exclaimed in admiration, Do-ha found videos like Yupia’s legendary award show performances on AiTube far more entertaining.
When an artist rushed onto the stage like thunder and extended the microphone toward the audience, there was a thrill in thousands of spectators singing the same song in unison.
-I just haven’t met a friend whose heart resonates with mine yet.
-Is that so? Is it hard to get close to the other kids?
Sometimes when someone forgot the lyrics, another member beside them would cover with a double, and when someone forgot the choreography, they’d watch another member leading ahead and match the tempo again.
Even with songs not famous to the public, one day that song could come to me as comfort, or sometimes just listening to it would naturally lift my mood, becoming a catalyst for change—and that fascinated him.
This was the kind of teammate Lee Do-ha wanted.
He had always been a third party.
At the taekwondo dojo or the soccer field, I could never be a true teammate.
To my mother, I was a pitiful son sacrificed to my father’s avatar fantasies,
to my father, I was an ungrateful child who betrayed him and chose music—a path with no answers,
and to my older sisters, I was a late-born younger brother they couldn’t quite bring themselves to hate, yet couldn’t freely love either.
-Mm….
Even the trainee life I had barely managed to find as a refuge wasn’t easy to adapt to.
-I just can’t dance, you see.
-…Ah.
-It’s not easy to do things like monthly evaluations together either.
Lee Do-ha couldn’t dance.
The friends I trained with said there could be idols who couldn’t sing, but they wouldn’t tolerate idols who couldn’t dance. Do-ha couldn’t quite understand that, but since he himself could neither sing nor dance, yet occupied a spot in the Special Class through only his natural physicality and rap skills alone, he thought he had to endure such grievances.
And he suffered under the self-imposed compulsion that to prove his worth, he absolutely had to hone his composition ability and rap skills.
-…Ah, right. Did you know a new trainee came in who’s the same age as you?
-Ah, yes. I think I heard about it. That… Tae-il made him cry, didn’t he…?
-No, no. That rumor got a bit exaggerated. Anyway, that’s not what’s important.
The rumored trainee.
It was on such an ordinary day that I first heard about Kang Ha-jin, who had arrived bearing the nickname “Miro’s Zhuge Liang.”
-For some reason, I think he’d get along well with you? He seems like a good guy. His audition song was “Blue”—you know, Yupia’s song. You like Yupia anyway.
-…”Blue”?
-Yeah. To put some pressure on him, Tae-il directed him personally in the recording studio, and apparently he got the okay in almost one take? He can do everything—dancing, singing, rapping. He’s tall too. Maybe a little shorter than you? And he’s good-looking.
A complete package.
A hexagonal trainee recognized even by Seo Tae-il—someone who excels at everything.
-Apparently he originally came through Rene Entertainment’s public audition, but our side separately contacted him and brought him in. There’s also talk that Manager Ji Su-ho had his eye on him.
-….
-Anyway, I hear he sings well too. Wouldn’t it be good if you got close and worked together? Si-woo says he’s been thinking about working with different vocal styles. From what the New Talent Development Team is saying, it seems like he’s completely opposite to Si-woo and Ha-ru?
Not someone like me, barely holding onto an excessive position through mere innate potential, but a capable person everyone acknowledges.
Perhaps someone who could complement my shortcomings and discover what I do well, creating synergy to make it shine even brighter—a complete teammate.
-…What’s his name?
I wanted to get close to him.
My absolute trust in Kang Ha-jin, whose face I didn’t even know, was already beginning from that moment.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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