Grab the Regressor by the Collar and Debut - Chapter 422

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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422. Let’s Go on a Trip! (3)
The shoot proceeded exactly as I had anticipated.
“Wow, this dormitory is nice! Who booked this?”
“Sung-ho did it, right? Sung-ho?”
“Not me. Mi-young, wasn’t it you?”
“No, it wasn’t me. It must have been Jung-hyuk. He’s the treasurer, right?”
“Why would I do it? The production team must have. They all came after getting contacted by Writer Yoon.”
“Ah, hyung. Please, just immerse yourself in the worldview a bit. Please.”
A luxury dormitory on some remote island with beautiful waters and mountains.
The group members appeared cheerfully under the concept of students from a certain club at Hi University who had embarked on a trip to build new camaraderie for the new semester. As a fixed program that had been running for six years, the members’ chemistry was top-notch.
“You picked a nice place, but~”
“Right. I’d love to come here with my wife someday.”
“Your wife…? Hyung, you’re still a college student right now?”
“…Well, I might have one in the future.”
“I, I want to go in first. I want to wash up and change clothes quickly. I’m sweaty and uncomfortable…. …Moooom!”
“Aaah!”
“What!”
“Why, why?”
Our entrance timing was right now.
Just as the members who were eager to go inside the dormitory, drop off their luggage, and play burst through the door, the female member in front who had turned the doorknob let out a scream the moment she caught sight of Jeong Si-u’s face up close—he had been waiting at the entrance after receiving a signal from the production team in advance.
Since the other members, excluding Main MC Sanchez Park, had been kept completely in the dark about our guest appearance today, their surprise was understandable….
“What? I just saw a god….”
…Ah, so that’s what she was surprised about.
Understanding her sentiment, I nodded in agreement, but Seo Tae-hyun beside me jabbed my ribs hard, telling me to stop being so smitten and focus on filming.
I wish he’d just said it with words, but if I responded that way, he’d probably come back with “Hyung, would you even listen if I said it?” So I just quietly grabbed my aching ribs and scrambled to my feet. This was where I had a line to deliver.
“No way! You guys…!?”
“Why is your acting tone like that?”
“You guys from Hi University who’ve always been our rivals!?”
As I delivered my scripted line while pointing dramatically in an exaggerated comedic tone, I could hear stifled laughter breaking out here and there.
But comedy sketches are all about momentum.
Unless I suddenly switched to serious dramatic acting and delivered Hamlet’s soliloquy, variety shows just needed to be funny.
“Did you guys seriously follow us all the way to our club’s MT?”
As expected, the fixed members who were giggling and trying to understand the situation gradually began to catch on to the setup. Among them, Sanchez, who was the only one who knew we were appearing today, rushed forward fastest and countered my pointing gesture.
“What are you guys doing in the dormitory we booked? This is the place we reserved.”
“What are you talking about? We booked this place first at Saegim University.”
“What, what university? Saegim? Saegim University~? Haha, that’s a hilarious university name!”
“The fans came up with it.”
“A university is definitely a place that makes you laugh just hearing its name! It’s a name that perfectly fits the meaning of such a space.”
“That’s a lie. I made it up.”
“You bastard…!”
Sanchez smoothly caught every cue I threw his way, grabbing my collar to deliver the perfect punchline to our sketch. I could see the Main PD and writers in front of us frantically taking notes—the camera angle was comedy gold.
Once our exchange had generated enough entertainment value, the secondary writer signaled Seo Tae-hyun. He rose carefully from the sofa beside me.
“Um….”
“Oh! It’s Seo Tae-hyun!”
“Oh my, it’s Seo Tae-hyun, Seo Tae-hyun!”
“Whoa, it’s Seo Tae-hyun! I’ve never seen him in person!”
“…Yes? Oh, yes, hello, nice to meet… wait, no, that’s not it.”
They actually had Seo Tae-hyun stumble through his lines.
Caught between maintaining the fictional world and idol etiquette, Seo Tae-hyun quickly composed himself. He cleared his throat softly, his ears flushed crimson, then smoothly delivered the scripted dialogue we’d been given by the production team beforehand.
“We came here to do a club retreat for one night and two days. Did you guys from Hi University book this place too?”
“Oh. Yeah, we did book this place for our retreat?”
“Why don’t you contact the pension owner? Just ask them directly—find out who booked it first.”
“We’ve been trying to reach them since we arrived, but they won’t pick up. That’s why I was about to go out and see if the owner’s home is nearby.”
“Um… but sorry, could you stand a bit further away? I have a feeling we shouldn’t be in the same camera shot together.”
“Wow, but seriously, you’re so handsome. Really handsome….”
“Yeah. I know.”
“Man, annoying but cool…. I want to say stuff like that too…!”
Jeong Si-u, still standing near the entrance, joined the sketch and calmly added to the setup.
As Jeong Si-u approached, both the female and male members were visibly captivated in real-time, while I delivered our final scripted line.
“Well… anyway, it looks like you guys booked this place too. If you don’t mind, want to just hang out together? Our clubs are rivals, but more people is always better, right? Our place is so big it felt kind of empty anyway.”
“Wait, you’re telling me there are only three of you and you rented this huge place? That doesn’t make sense. Shouldn’t you guys be the ones changing accommodations?”
“Right, you’re three people and we’re seven. You should be the ones giving way.”
“No, no, we can’t give way. This is our place!”
The male comedian, who typically played the role of instigator and troublemaker in this program, spoke up, and the other members agreed. The female members, delighted to see male idol guests for the first time in a while, added more banter with “Then you guys go home.”
“Um….”
“…Huh? What? Ahhhhh!”
“What, there’s more?”
“Huh!? They all came!?”
Just as the atmosphere reached its peak, the remaining members of Kairos, who had been hiding in the room behind the fixed panelists, cautiously peeked out and stepped outside. The Main Writer had come up with this idea—since it was our first group variety show appearance, we didn’t want to make our entrance too easily.
I awkwardly shook hands and greeted the fixed members while glancing at the others joining our side, then confidently delivered our final line.
“Sorry, but all seven of us are here. Let’s have fun together.”
Right on cue, our song and promotional video should play now with the Kairos group introduction.
They said it’s in 4K quality anyway.
* * *
After we wrapped up the opening sketch, the proper guest introduction and greeting segment began.
There was a supplementary setting that “members from both university clubs, having decided to hang out together, sit down and introduce themselves,” but in reality, it was just a guest introduction time disguised as something else.
And of course, we had no intention of letting even this clichéd introduction segment go to waste.
-…Huh?
-…?
-Father-in-law…?
-What? No, wait, what are you talking about!
Dan Ha-ru, who had been hesitantly emerging from the room, instantly summoned his past life the moment he spotted the male panelist who had revealed during his last appearance that Destiny had a daughter.
-How is your sister doing!
-Who are you to ask about our daughter’s wellbeing! …No, wait, that’s not what I meant.

As the male panelist wavered between the college student worldview and reality as a doting father, another male broadcaster in the tank position next to him quickly grabbed the father-in-law’s shoulder and shook it frantically.
-Get your head straight! What are you saying, hyung? You’re a college student right now—how could you have a daughter!
-Why wouldn’t I have a daughter…. No, I mean, maybe in the future I could~ that’s what I’m saying….
-Ha-ru, you get your head on straight too! You’re not an idol right now—you’re a college student! A Saegim University student!
-Ow, my head hurts….
Dan Ha-ru’s variety show talent was remarkable—the way he suddenly acted as if his head ached to match that buildup.
That guy, him. I couldn’t tell anymore if Dan Ha-ru had become skilled at imitating Sparkle, or if this was his original personality slowly surfacing. Either way, it wasn’t bad for me.
-But seriously, these guys’ singing and dancing are incredible, aren’t they?
The guest introduction segment naturally included time for new song promotion and publicity.
-Yeah, yeah. You guys dance well, so show us once. Let’s see it.
-No, we can’t. They don’t usually show their dance carelessly.
-No, let me just break character for a second. I’m telling you, last time too, when I was finally heading home, I ended up watching their music video? I was so embarrassed about it….
-Oppa, that’s the thirteenth time you’ve told that story.
That last shoot where we boldly skipped all of that certainly seemed to have left an impression.
It had been around last winter when that happened, yet all the cast members vividly remembered exactly how our group had filmed that day. Some of them might even be hoping we’d come fully charged with eccentricity again and overturn this stale table once more.
-Alright.
-…?
But if there was a difference between then and now, it was that back then we had something to compare ourselves against, and now we didn’t.
The situation was different from that last special where we risked being lumped together as mediocre, buried under the slots of two other teams.
-So we’ll specially show you one song. We don’t usually show this easily, you know.
Now this is our solo stage.
There wasn’t a single rookie idol in this world who would pass up such a good opportunity.
So we performed the highlight choreography of our current activity track 【A Very Bad Story】, the live performance of 【This Isn’t a Carol】 that we couldn’t show last time, and even a random play dance of girl group songs featuring Seo Tae-hyun and Lee Yu-gun, properly making our official debut.
“Alright, for our club―!”
“For our club―!”
After that, the games progressed very quickly.
Just as I’d predicted, we did some water games by team, played footvolley (…) once, had a barbecue before sunset, and then it was evening.
The filming proceeded throughout with a Kairos VS Touch High structure, and even the members who had been somewhat nervous at first when major celebrities swarmed the first public broadcast were gradually loosening up in both body and spirit.
“Alright, alright. So, technically according to broadcast regulations this isn’t alcohol, but…! (No, seriously, stop breaking the fourth wall, oppa.) Anyway, since Saegim and Hi University have come together like this, let’s enjoy some proper games together, yeah?”
And the final game of tonight according to the shooting cue sheet was none other than a bundle of drinking games for the MT.
Except for the words ‘drinking game’ and the penalty shots, the list of group games prepared by the production team was filled entirely with games commonly enjoyed at drinking gatherings.
‘They must have seen how we extracted sweet views and buzz from our game at the Idol Athletic Games, huh?’
I could definitely feel that the production team had done a lot of preliminary research about us in the segments they’d prepared.
This is why it has longevity, I thought, but as someone who once wanted to create broadcasts and produce segments like this, I also felt respect.
“Oh, by the way, what’s Kairos’ alcohol tolerance like?”
“Kairos?”
“…Ah, right, Saegim University, Saegim University.”
Sanchez Park, who had naturally taken on the MC role from the center position once again, subtly shattered the fourth wall and lobbed a question our way.
Since it was a broadcast network channel and our group included minors, there was no drinking during filming. But this level of conversational topic was common on broadcasts these days, so I grabbed a snack from the table in front of me and answered.
“Well, we still have some underage friends in our group….”
“Underage but college students?”
“They’re geniuses, so they skipped grades.”
“That’s impressive….”
“Ha-ru and Eun-chan over there haven’t tried it yet since they’re still minors….”
“Nah, I think that’s something we wouldn’t know about.”
When one of the male panelists joked with a mischievous glint in his eye, everyone burst out laughing. Ju Eun-chan and Dan Ha-ru, sitting far away, frantically denied it and attempted to explain themselves.
Well, actually only Ju Eun-chan was doing that—Dan Ha-ru beside him had a slightly guilty expression as he rode along with Ju Eun-chan’s explanation.
‘I just remembered that guy asking Lee Yu-gun if he had any cigarettes.’
Ah, a headache. He’s probably quit by now, that bastard.
“What about Ha-jin? Ha-jin’s an adult now. Have you tried drinking? What’s your alcohol tolerance like? You seem like you’d be able to handle a lot?”
The seasoned Sanchez Park smoothly found the editing point and passed the question to me.
Alcohol tolerance… How should I answer this naturally and cleanly?
After thinking for a moment, I answered with perfect brevity.
“I’ve never gotten drunk, so I’m not sure.”
“Ooooh―!”
“Right, you look like you’d be good at drinking?”
Since I’d never drunk, I’d never gotten drunk either.
My answer wasn’t wrong, but it wasn’t quite right either—the group members who knew my constitution all began snickering and laughing. Then the microphone passed to Jeong Si-u, the eldest.
“Si-woo? But somehow you don’t seem like you’d be into drinking sessions like this.”
“Right. You probably haven’t played many games like this either, have you?”
“Something about Si-woo makes me feel like you’d think this kind of thing is a bit childish, just from your face.”
Hmm. A classic case of the “Jeong Si-u first impression error” phenomenon.
Jeong Si-u, who had been calmly listening to the image people had of him, soon answered with a shy laugh (why?)
“Haha, I’ve never tried it, so I’m not sure.”
“See? Just as I thought~”
“Yeah, yeah, that’s exactly how you look, really.”
That’s probably right.
After all, he’d been more on the giving end than the receiving end….

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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