Grab the Regressor by the Collar and Debut - Chapter 192
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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192. JACK
“Tighter! More dynamic! Show me the energy that Kairos possesses!”
Did the Photographer really need to be this committed while wearing an animal onesie?
I’d almost apologize for suspecting this was a hidden camera prank—every staff member, including the Photographer, was brimming with passion.
The concept for the group photo was supposed to be simple: gather together and create an atmosphere of joy and camaraderie. But our adorable, utterly smitten Photographer seemed to want something more.
“Great! It’s like the brilliant heat of wild animals roaming the Serengeti on a bright summer day!”
“Yes, of course….”
No matter how many times I hear it, I still have no idea what he’s talking about.
I thought my years of fandom experience and the expertise I’d built during my PD days had made me immune to most moe-fication and obsessive behavior, but….
‘Why does my pride feel wounded?’
Either way, we did our best at every request, fueled by the audacity and passion of newcomers.
…Though honestly, a few of them actually seemed to be genuinely enjoying themselves.
“Wheee! Do-ha, I’m getting dizzy!”
“Hey, what if we tried making a pyramid or something? Like, all of us climbing up together….”
“If Eun-chan wants to try it, then we should.”
Watching Ha-ru spin around on Lee Do-ha’s back like he was riding an amusement park ride, and Ju Eun-chan enthusiastically suggesting the next pose to Jeong Si-u, I felt an unexpected sense of peace wash over me.
Yeah, well. As long as the kids are having fun, that’s what matters….
“….”
“What are you doing?”
“I just remembered working a short-term shift at a kids’ cafe. Reality hit me for a moment.”
Right, so there was one person not enjoying himself.
Lee Yu-gun was experiencing firsthand that ‘highly moe-fied idol activities are no different from being a play angel at a kids’ cafe.’ I gave his shoulder a light pat, and he hesitated for a moment before asking me carefully.
“Doesn’t this kind of thing make you cringe?”
“Pretending to be cute isn’t hard for me. The problem is I’m just not cute.”
“….”
“Are you really going to get serious over a joke meant to lighten the mood?”
Lee Yu-gun, who’d grown a bit tense at my aegyo, relaxed his expression and turned his head. I could see Seo Tae-hyun actively communicating with the staff members, exchanging ideas.
Huh? Is this the moment to solve the marital discord?
I glanced sideways at Lee Yu-gun’s state and opened my mouth as if nothing was wrong.
“Seo Tae-hyun is really amazing too, isn’t he? I guess that’s why they say some people are just born to be idols.”
To my seemingly casual remark, Lee Yu-gun nodded more easily than expected and answered as if it were obvious.
“Well, he was always good at it anyway.”
Huh? The atmosphere doesn’t seem bad at all?
Jeong Si-u’s claim that they weren’t fighting because they hated each other seemed to be true. Lee Yu-gun gazed quietly toward where Seo Tae-hyun was, then silently stood up. I also got up thinking I’d probe a bit more, but the shoot resumed before I could.
“Alright, everyone. Kairos, your attention please.”
The Photographer clapped his hands to focus us. With the same serious expression he’d worn when giving me advice earlier, he made an appeal to us.
“I know your outfits and poses are a little bit funny, right? I completely understand that some of you might have expected something fresher and glossier. I get that this shoot might feel a bit awkward for you.”
Why is he going that far…?
I wanted to ask, ‘Don’t you see the kids are already having fun?’ but I wasn’t Seo Tae-il with 13 years of experience, and a rookie newcomer two weeks away from debut had no right to speak up.
Regardless, the Photographer launched into an impassioned speech, eyes blazing with fervor (or so he thought).
“However! I believe idols have a mission to spread fantasy, energy, and happiness to their fans. I heard this photo is your first profile before debut. If that’s the case, shouldn’t you do your absolute best for all the Destiny fans who will be delighted seeing this?”
Who exactly is this person to even know about Destiny?
Even as suspicions about the Photographer’s identity deepened, the members found themselves increasingly captivated by their peculiar passion.
“More concepts and powerful direction await you in the future. I hope you’ll all push your potential to the absolute maximum here. You can do it! You can be even more energetic!”
So how much more energetic are we supposed to be while wearing animal onesies, exactly?
Just as that thought crossed my mind, the Photographer gestured, and a Staff Member rushed over with a tablet.
“With that in mind, I’d like to try one final pose.”
“…This one?”
On the tablet, seven models struck bizarre poses that formed one massive formation. To put it kindly, it was a formation—but the first thing that came to mind was…
“Uh, isn’t this like X Ranger….”
“Tch. Ha-ru, quiet.”
It was the kind of heroic pose you’d see in those magical warrior sentai shows.
Are we serious about this?
I looked at Ji Su-ho with eyes full of doubt, but he just beamed back at me, saying that once we finished this, we could go home.
Right, rookies don’t get a say. If they tell you to do it, you do it.
With a half-resigned expression, I quickly claimed my position.
“Dan Ha-ru, you’re center. I’ll take far left.”
“Huh? I’m center?”
“You just seem like red to me. Everyone pick your spots quickly. Let’s shoot and get out of here.”
Since I was the loudest among the members and set the tone first, the others didn’t resist much and began moving to the Photo Zone after confirming their poses. Following Dan Ha-ru, who confidently took center as I’d said, Jeong Si-u tilted his puppy hat backward and struck a pose with one leg and arm raised, gazing diagonally upward.
Even with that ridiculous pose, his face was so handsome he just looked like a beautiful sculpture, which made me wonder why this guy always took the lead in situations like this. Before I knew it, I was staring intently, and Si-u felt my gaze, turning his head slightly to speak to me.
“What? Get in position quickly.”
“You really… seem to enjoy this kind of thing.”
“If you only do handsome poses every time, it gets boring. I wanted to try something like this.”
I see….
His answer left me speechless, so I just nodded and took my chosen pose—a handstand freeze. Naturally, Lee Do-ha, who stood beside me, placed my legs on his shoulder to support me while striking a martial arts pose himself.
Once Ju Eun-chan took his spot next to Jeong Si-u, only Lee Yu-gun and Seo Tae-hyun remained. And there was exactly one pose left.
“Uh….”
“…Step on me.”
“What?”
“I can’t step on you. Do it quickly.”
Lee Yu-gun, having confirmed the remaining pose, tapped his thigh toward Seo Tae-hyun. Tae-hyun hesitated for a moment, then stepped onto Yu-gun’s thigh and struck a pose in mid-air.
“Okay, going right now. Don’t lose your expression! You’re all professionals!”
Beyond the Photographer’s words, Staff Members around us showered us with encouragement, calling out things like “cute,” “cool,” and “professional” from all directions. Just as reality was starting to set in, people’s genuine admiration at the results made us start believing in it too.
“Hmm. How about we step back a bit and try the pose again? Right now you’re too close to the background.”
At the Photographer’s request after taking several shots, we released our poses and stood up. Then we stepped back without any suspicion.
…If we’d thought about it even a little slowly, we might have questioned why distance from the background mattered on a white chroma key wall. But our eyes and ears were already obscured by the massive sense of responsibility that came with being “Professional.”
“More, keep going. Just a bit more. More!”
“Go back further?”
“There’s a wall here though?”
“Yes, sounds good. I’ll move back a bit more. Back, back!”
Following the instructions, I continued backward until I reached the end of the wall where the white fabric hung. There was nowhere left to go, yet the Photographer kept shouting “A little more!” while checking the camera angle.
The moment I sensed something off and pressed my hand against the wall beyond the curtain….
“Huh?”
Boom!
Crash!
Thud!
Ju Eun-chan, following orders without suspicion and leaning back against what he thought was the wall beyond the curtain, simply fell backward instead. Something tore with a ripping sound, and the curtain we’d been standing on came tumbling down, covering us.
As one person tangled and started to fall, all the members collapsed backward like dominoes. Fearing something serious might happen, I instinctively cradled Dan Ha-ru’s head beside me—,
“…Huh?”
What greeted us as we fell wasn’t a hard floor, but the soft sensation of a mattress.
Confused about what was happening, I quickly swept away the curtain covering us and checked our surroundings. Where there should have been a wall, numerous Staff Members and cameras were pointed directly at us.
“What on earth is….”
The other members also seemed to be processing the situation, their faces blank with bewilderment.
I quickly scanned the area. It appeared that what was originally one large Studio had been divided with temporary walls and roughly covered with chroma key fabric. The space where we’d fallen was an empty area that seemed deliberately created between those partitions.
“Ladies and gentlemen!”
Beyond the space, from the Photo Zone where we’d originally been, Ji Su-ho and the remaining Staff Members were grinning widely at us. Overwhelmed by an inexplicable sense of betrayal, I remained sitting where I’d fallen, when a very familiar voice came through the gaps between several cameras.
“Welcome to Kairos’ debut reality show, ‘Today’s Kairos’!”
My former workplace superior and current Main PD of Miro Maze.
The Team Leader of Studio Q, who through a deal with Joo Eun-seok would be producing all sorts of variety content with Miro for at least a year.
That was Kwon Myung—the PD of ‘Forced Resignation’ (where Kwon PD and Go Writer spend all four seasons at the workplace).
As the members scrambled to their feet and grasped the situation, fake confetti exploded beside us with a bang! Simultaneously, a banner hanging from the ceiling unfurled with a whoosh.
“Today’s Kairos, Episode 1’s theme is!”
【☆Does Praise Really Make Even Whales Dance?☆】
“What happens when we lock Kairos in a praise prison!? It was a hidden camera experiment~”
…These damn broadcast station bastards again!
Glancing back, I saw the Photographer, mad with joy, handing the camera to a Staff Member and bowing apologetically to everyone. Then Go Se-eun, the Writer standing beside me, quickly added an explanation.
“Ah. By the way, the Photographer is a real writer. We tried to hire an actor, but he said it would be more fun to do it himself…. So all your profile photos were genuine. Though the animal onesies you’re wearing now were purely for the reality opening cutout….”
At those words, all the members’ faces fell into expressions of betrayal and disappointment. I too looked at Kwon PD with a hollow expression, and he grinned at me cheerfully.
“Do you know how much the staff struggled to fool someone as quick-witted as Ha-jin?”
Damn it.
The path of a demanding idol?
I knew something was off!
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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