Will You Cry for Me If I Die? - Chapter 39

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 39

 

My forehead touched his clothes.

 

Theodor held my hand.

 

Small hands wrapped around mine.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

He asked.

 

His voice was still wet.

 

I paused for a moment.

 

If I say I’m okay, I’ll want to sleep more.

 

My body will relax immediately.

 

But I can’t sleep now.

 

It’s not over yet.

 

So I said this.

 

As if leaving it behind.

 

“Not yet.”

 

Lermiel said quietly.

 

Standing at the doorway.

 

“I will watch over you until the end tonight.”

 

Even after hearing those words, I didn’t nod.

 

Instead, I opened my eyes wide.

 

I forced my eyelids up as they tried to fall.

 

Four-year-olds’ eyes close quickly when sleepy.

 

The body gives in first.

 

So I have to force them open even more.

 

I thought to myself.

 

‘I want to grow up quickly.’

 

Then I won’t get sleepy so easily all the time.

 

And I made a resolution. I’ll find out more tomorrow.

 

Learning a little more about what I don’t know is important.

 

Who is after my blood.

 

Who is tormenting Lermiel.

 

I gripped Theodor’s hand tightly.

 

His palm was warm.

 

Small warmth kept touching me.

 

Warmth calls for sleep.

 

My eyes slowly grew heavy.

 

I squinted and endured, but soon drifted off to sleep.

 

* * *

 

Morning came suddenly.

 

It continued as if there was nothing in between.

 

As soon as I opened my eyes, light came in first.

 

Outside the window was spread white.

 

Light slowly spread.

 

I wiggled my body under the blanket.

 

My legs moved inside the covers.

 

My body feels heavy.

 

Yesterday’s fatigue still remained.

 

My eyelids feel gritty.

 

Opening my eyes was a bit slow.

 

Four-year-olds are just tired when they’re tired.

 

I don’t really know why.

 

There are no words to explain it.

 

Theodor was snoring beside me.

 

Softly, intermittently.

 

He was sleeping with his mouth open.

 

Breath came out through his mouth.

 

I paused for a moment to look at his face.

 

It’s different from the crying face yesterday.

 

His eyes weren’t swollen.

 

Now it’s peaceful.

 

There’s no movement.

 

I reached out and pressed his cheek firmly.

 

My finger sank into the flesh.

 

It was soft.

 

It pressed gently and bounced back.

 

Theodor frowned and mumbled.

 

His mouth moved slightly.

 

“Rumel… stop…”

 

I smiled inwardly.

 

‘This is fun.’

 

I pressed firmly again.

 

My finger pressed the flesh deeper.

 

The soft sensation remained at my fingertips.

 

Theodor bolted upright.

 

The blanket was pushed to one side.

 

“What!”

 

He shouted.

 

His voice was still drowsy with sleep.

 

I sat up on the bed and said energetically.

 

I straightened my back.

 

“Wake up.”

 

I said it short and clear.

 

Theodor stared at me, then suddenly hugged me.

 

Our bodies pressed together at once.

 

“You’re alive!”

 

His voice rang out close by.

 

My face was pressed against his shoulder.

 

My cheek was pressed against the fabric.

 

I couldn’t breathe.

 

Air didn’t come in well.

 

I pushed his chest with my palm.

 

The boy was easily pushed even with a four-year-old’s strength.

 

“I can’t breathe!”

 

Theodor jumped back in surprise.

 

His body bounced backward.

 

“Ah!”

 

He made an apologetic face.

 

His eyes widened then lowered.

 

I nodded.

 

A sign that it’s okay.

 

Alive.

 

Those words bothered me.

 

Last night, the black-clad person put their hand under my bed.

 

A hand moving in the darkness.

 

When I think of that hand, my body shrinks first.

 

My shoulders curl inward.

 

I shook off that thought.

 

I shook my head briefly.

 

It’s morning now.

 

There is light.

 

Morning is less scary.

 

There was a knocking sound at the door.

 

Knock, knock.

 

The rhythm was steady.

 

“Come in.”

 

Theodor said loudly.

 

The air in the room moved again.

 

The door opened and a servant entered.

 

The door panel was pushed gently.

 

Demian followed behind.

 

His steps were quiet.

 

Demian swept the room at a glance.

 

His gaze moved quickly.

 

Under the bed, the window, the threshold.

 

The sequence was unbroken.

 

He looked at my face last.

 

His gaze stopped.

 

“Did you sleep well.”

 

He asked.

 

I hesitated for a moment.

 

There was a brief time to choose my words.

 

I didn’t sleep well.

 

I woke up in the middle, and my body felt heavy.

 

But I did sleep.

 

My eyes did close.

 

“A little.”

 

When I spoke, Demian let out a very small sigh.

 

His breath came out briefly.

 

“Later.”

 

He said.

 

He didn’t continue the sentence.

 

“Eat breakfast.”

 

I nodded.

 

My head moved up and down.

 

My stomach made a growling sound.

 

It sounded louder in the quiet room.

 

I was embarrassed by the sound.

 

I pressed my stomach with my hand.

 

My palm touched my stomach.

 

Theodor laughed.

 

His mouth opened.

 

“You’re hungry!”

 

Instead of answering, I narrowed my eyes.

 

The corners of my eyes drooped slightly.

 

Demian looked down at my feet.

 

His gaze fell downward.

 

“You need to put on shoes.”

 

When he gestured, the servant put new socks on my feet.

 

The touch was careful.

 

Soft.

 

The fabric wrapped around my feet.

 

Warm.

 

The temperature rose.

 

I wiggled my toes.

 

They moved inside the socks.

 

It tickled and I almost laughed.

 

The inside of my mouth stirred.

 

I pressed my lips tightly together.

 

Laughing still feels awkward.

 

It doesn’t come naturally.

 

The corridor to the dining hall was quiet.

 

Footsteps echoed for a long time.

 

It was different from yesterday’s banquet hall.

 

The light and sound were different.

 

The palace could be this quiet.

 

That was more suspicious.

 

The less movement there was, the more noticeable it became.

 

Knights had increased along every wall.

 

Their positions were dense.

 

Their eyes were quick, and their hands were tense.

 

Their fingers lingered near their sword hilts.

 

I looked at them and spoke.

 

I tilted my head slightly.

 

“Many.”

 

Demian answered.

 

He didn’t stop walking.

 

“Because something happened last night.”

 

I looked at Theodor.

 

The face walking beside me.

 

“Will they come again at night?”

 

I asked.

 

Theodor’s face hardened.

 

His mouth closed.

 

“If they come, I’ll beat them!”

 

He said.

 

He clenched his fist small.

 

I didn’t believe those words.

 

Theodor is strong.

 

He has strength and moves quickly.

 

But the adult world has a different kind of strength.

 

There are many things you can’t see.

 

I learned that at the Research Institute.

 

As I entered the dining hall, the smell hit me first.

 

Warm air touched my nose.

 

Bread, warm milk, sweet jam.

 

And meat.

 

The scents layered and spread.

 

I sat down on the chair.

 

A servant pulled the chair out for me.

 

The chair was too high, so my feet didn’t reach the floor.

 

My legs dangled in the air.

 

I swung my feet in the empty space.

 

I did it unconsciously, then tried to straighten my legs properly again, but Theodor chuckled.

 

His shoulders shook as laughter leaked out.

 

“Cute.”

 

He said.

 

I spoke forcefully.

 

I straightened my back even more.

 

“I’m not cute!”

 

I pushed the words out loudly.

 

Theodor laughed even more.

 

He couldn’t hold back his breath.

 

And then he impudently shouted again.

 

He raised his voice even higher.

 

“Cute!”

 

“Eek!”

 

I made a short sound.

 

My mouth reacted first.

 

Then the door opened.

 

The hinges turned smoothly.

 

Lermiel entered.

 

His steps were steady.

 

He wore more formal clothes than yesterday.

 

Everything was arranged without a single wrinkle.

 

The marks on his neck were hidden beneath his collar.

 

The buttons were fastened high up.

 

But even when hidden, the smell remains.

 

Very faintly, the scent of old blood.

 

I wrinkled my nose.

 

The bridge of my nose crinkled slightly.

 

Lermiel bowed his head toward me.

 

He bent his waist just a little.

 

“Did you sleep peacefully through the night?”

 

His tone was gentle.

 

I answered immediately.

 

I didn’t think long about it.

 

“Not peaceful.”

 

Lermiel’s lips paused for just a moment.

 

His expression stopped, then returned.

 

He nodded his head.

 

Small, once.

 

“I see.”

 

He sat not next to me, but in a seat a little distance away.

 

He left one chair empty between us.

 

A distance that maintained boundaries.

 

As if he had drawn a line with his eyes.

 

I saw that and asked.

 

I tilted my head while holding my fork.

 

“Why far away?”

 

Lermiel looked at me.

 

Our gazes met directly.

 

“You are a child.”

 

That word again.

 

The same words repeat.

 

That word keeps coming up since earlier.

 

I hate that word.

 

It means small.

 

When you’re small, you get pushed aside.

 

I held my fork and spoke forcefully.

 

Strength went into my hand.

 

“You’re also a substitute!”

 

Lermiel’s eyes wavered for a moment.

 

Theodor opened his mouth wide.

 

His face became surprised.

 

“Is it okay to say that?”

 

He asked.

 

I nodded my head.

 

I didn’t stop.

 

“Speaking the truth always comes with danger.”

 

Lermiel said in an even more subdued voice.

—————
This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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