The Trashy PD Has To Survive as an Idol - Chapter 55

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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55

[Title: (Exclusive Preview) Joo Woo-sung and Seo Ho-yoon’s Chaotic Phone Mission Hoping to Get Closer ʕ•ﻌ•ʔ]

Joo Woo-sung: A phone mission… without the members??? (Eyes wide in shock)

Woo-sung, who had no friends outside the group, pondered for a moment before calling someone!

Joo Woo-sung: I don’t think he’ll pick up…
???: (Phone rings) Yes, this is Seo Ho-yoon.
It was Seo Ho-yoon from The Dun!!

The keyword: Get him to say “handsome”!

Joo Woo-sung: Yeah, yeah. Hyung, look, I don’t really want to hear you say I’m cool or anything…
And I definitely don’t want to hear that I’m handsome… you know?

Two in the morning and already getting awkward!

Seo Ho-yoon: You shouldn’t ask others about your own appearance. Live with more autonomy.
Joo Woo-sung: ???

Surprisingly sound advice!

Seo Ho-yoon: Ah… I’m not confident with quizzes…
(1 minute later)
Seo Ho-yoon: Daejeon, Daegu, Busan, Incheon, Gwangju, Ulsan.
Production Staff: …????
(What is Seo Ho-yoon’s true identity?)

Production Staff: What is Joo Woo-sung’s favorite food?

(Clips from past variety shows flash by, revealing his obsession with kimchi fried rice.)
Joo Woo-sung: I love kimchi fried rice so much ♡

Joo Woo-sung: (shrugging with satisfaction) Of course I’d get it right, haha
Seo Ho-yoon: (silence)
Joo Woo-sung: …?

(Seo Ho-yoon hesitating….)

Seo Ho-yoon: Do I really need to know that….
Joo Woo-sung: ??!

BUZZ!!!

Seo Ho-yoon: …If you have nothing else to say, should I hang up?
Joo Woo-sung: Yeah, hang up the call and cut ties too.

A swift severance!

Joo Woo-sung: It’s my fault for calling that (-beep-) Seo Ho-yoon, (-beep-)….
(Joo Woo-sung’s profanity has been censored)
(Our program adheres to broadcast censorship standards.^^)

Joo Woo-sung: Who is Seo Ho-yoon anyway? Who even suggested we call in the first place??

(Joo Woo-sung….
We hope you two reconcile soon.)

└ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ I really laughed like a dogㅅㅂㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ (4911 likes)
Joo Woo-sung: Of course I’ll get it right, haha?
Seo Ho-yoon: (bewildered)
This surprisingly awkward business relationship!
└└ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ so cute ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ
Looks like those two are really close hahahaha ah, I’m so glad Juseong made a friend,,
└How did Seo Ho-yoon get all the trivia questions right?? Is it scripted?
└└Famous for having no script
└└If it’s real, that’s insane, and knowing that music broadcast debut date means he’s a real Joo Woo-sung fan
└└Isn’t he a K-pop veteran….
└No, but I’m a fan, so why don’t I know how to make kimchi fried rice? Haha. My mom knows that Joo Woo-sung is crazy because he eats kimchi fried rice on all of his entertainment shows. Haha.
└Seo Ho-yoon turned out to be a scary person….
└└From when Shining Star nominated Today… that was intense….
└└Can’t read the context? When did I ever say that?
└└(Reported comment)]

Appearing on variety shows really does get good reactions. Maybe it’s because Joo Woo-sung has seniority and high public recognition, but it’s turning out pretty well.

But still….

[What’s this… Why is Seo Ho-yoon doing variety shows alone? Don’t you know you have to push the group hard in the early stages of being a rookie? Isn’t the agency taking care of things??]
[Seo Ho-yoon must be desperately trying to shine on his own. I’ve seen a million idols like that in K-pop]
“Ugh, it’s so gross seeing them cling to Joosung~ Stop being pathetic~ (vomiting emoticon)”

How are these hate comments exactly what I expected?
I scrolled through the malicious comments and hesitated slightly. Getting cursed at like this was nothing—it was routine back when I worked with the PD.

‘Individual schedule….’

It’s true that going on variety shows alone under an individual schedule gets you cursed at. The fact that Joo Woo-sung “called first” seems to be keeping it from being worse….

“Hyung, what’s the view count?”

If the members themselves started avoiding individual schedules, that would be problematic.

‘If teamwork gets muddied, there’s nothing good about it.’

I gave Kang Yi-chae an appropriate response as he spoke cheerfully.

“Right? The pre-release response has been solid.”
“I think I need to work on the track a bit more… So today you’re doing a variety show with Joo Woo-sung?”
“Yeah. What about the rest of the guys?”
“Jung Da-jun is practicing with Sung Ji-won.”

Kang Yi-chae rattled off the members’ schedules effortlessly. So I wouldn’t be able to gauge the rest of the team’s reactions. I nodded, and Kang Yi-chae chuckled and showed me something.

“Check this out.”
“What is it?”
“Hyun-sung’s photo from today.”

Kang Yi-chae showed me a photo of Kim Sung-hyun in a police uniform.

[Police Agency Ambassador Kim Sung-hyun]

Because of the incident last time, he’d become an important icon in the campaign to eradicate school violence. Kim Sung-hyun had repeatedly refused with an awkward expression, but he eventually surrendered to Sung Ji-won’s lengthy persuasion about how he could positively influence so many people.

“I should post this in the group chat.”

[Kang Yi-chae: (photo)]
[Kang Yi-chae: (photo)]
[Kang Yi-chae: Ohhhhh~~!! You look amazing, hyung!]
[Jung Da-jun: He’s shining, shining—is this what they call ‘godly Sung-hyun’?]
[Kang Yi-chae: Huh? Is that… ‘me’?]
[Kim Sung-hyun: …]
[Kim Sung-hyun: Stop it.]
[Sung Ji-won: Oh, it’s today! You’ve got this!!]

I let out a small sigh watching the endless messages pile up in the group chat.

‘I need to keep things exactly as they are.’

The Dun members all had impeccable character.
Compared to Today, who spectacularly crashed and burned and is now bouncing between police investigations and military enlistment… No, if I compared them to those bastards, anyone would look like an angel.
In any case, because they understood what each other had been through, the bonds between members were tight.

“….”

If this teamwork were to fracture, it wouldn’t come from external pressures—it would come from within. So what kind of trouble could arise internally?
At this point in time, there was only one answer.
Individual settlement payments.

‘Honestly, it’s an important issue.’

My current contract had been renewed under conditions favorable only to me. The members likely had no idea about this arrangement.
What if they discovered my contract was different from theirs? Would they sue the company?
No, at minimum there’d be a hundred percent chance of team discord. I needed to prevent such misfortune beforehand.

‘I’ll need to revise all the contracts at some point.’

But lately, I couldn’t figure out where the CEO was. When I asked the Manager, he said the CEO was out doing business rounds because of Min Ji-heon’s filming location in China—our agency’s marquee actor.

‘This is making me want to put the CEO in line.’

The best timing I could think of was when we hit number one with this comeback song. At least then I’d have decent leverage for negotiations.

“Hyung.”

There was no point in telling him now that I’d changed only my contract….

“Hyung!”
“Huh? What?”
“What are you thinking so hard about? You didn’t even hear me.”
“Oh, sorry. What did you say?”
“Is this hyung acting weird sometimes?”

Kang Yi-chae clicked his tongue.

“I asked when you’d be coming back later.”
“I’m thinking probably not until dawn.”

Kang Yi-chae narrowed his eyes and stared at me. From what I’d seen so far, Kang Yi-chae’s perception was so sharp it was practically Usain Bolt-level.
I casually averted my gaze and threw out a question.

“Kang Yi-chae, what are you going to do when you get your settlement payment?”
“Huh? Suddenly?”

It’s true that it was sudden—.
But I couldn’t bring myself to ask, “Did I change the contract on my own, and now you’re going to be really upset about it?” so I threw out a question about settlement instead.

“Well? There’s nothing I particularly want right now. I have pretty much every gaming console, and I just upgraded my computer to top specs not long ago.”
“Gaming consoles….”

Now that I thought about it, Kim Sung-hyun had tried to throw them all away last time, and I desperately stopped him. I only managed to keep the gaming consoles after reluctantly promising him I wouldn’t play for more than five hours a day.
What do kids usually like? I tried to recall the preferences of celebrities in their twenties that I’d seen when I was a PD.

“Hmm, don’t you want a watch or a car? Kids your age usually like that kind of stuff.”
“What are you talking about…. No, wait.”
“…?”
“You’re talking like you’re not my age, hyung?”

Scary kid. Cold sweat dripped down my back.

“You know, the kind of thing you want to buy once you get money.”
“Well….”

Kang Yi-chae trailed off and just shrugged his shoulders.

“I’m not really interested in money like that.”
“…?!”

‘This can’t be real.’

Did such a species exist in South Korea?
I, a bone-deep capitalist South Korean commoner, fell into shock. I become happy just looking at my bank balance when times are tough…?
The shock was so great that Kang Yi-chae, scratching his ear, almost seemed noble.

“…Why? Are you planning to entrust your life to some religion?”
“Yeah. Just pray it’s not a cult.”
“Don’t suddenly contact me asking me to buy you linoleum.”
“Ahahaha.”

Seeing him ramble on with trivial banter, it seemed like just a joke. Kang Yi-chae slightly furrowed his brow and tapped his phone with his index finger.

“It’s just…. I’ve seen so much of people becoming endlessly ugly over money that I’m tired of it.”
“….”

‘I stepped on a landmine.’

Isn’t this about me?
Cold sweat beaded on my skin, and I missed my chance to respond. Kang Yi-chae seemed to realize his slip as well, quickly pivoting the conversation.

“No, I mean, that’s just how I see it.”

As if he’d misspoken, he lowered the ends of his eyebrows and offered a gentle laugh.

“Anyway, Hyung, we’re going to be late. Let’s go.”
“…Yeah.”

I turned to leave for the schedule, but then I spun back around. Kang Yi-chae’s eyes widened in surprise at my sudden movement.

“Hey.”
“Huh?”
“…Should I grab something you like on the way?”

Understanding the intent behind those words, Kang Yi-chae burst into laughter.

“What exactly are you planning to buy? Do you even know what I like?”
“…Chicken?”
“….”

Wrong guess.

“Hamburger? Pizza? Or maybe jjajangmyeon?”
“If we’d done the phone mission together, I would’ve failed.”

I nodded sheepishly. Everyone seems to expect so much from me these days.

“I’ll just grab whatever.”
“Ugh~.”

I brushed it off and left the dormitory, walking with long strides when a System Window suddenly popped into the corner of my vision.

Ding!

[Trying to smooth things over with food whenever you mess up…. That’s exactly why Kang Yi-chae dislikes you.]

“…Well, if I just give them something to eat, they’ll calm down a bit.”

[As if that would work….]

I fumbled through a rather pathetic excuse without thinking.
But in the back of my mind, urgent thoughts tangled together in a frenzy.

‘I need to rank first as quickly as possible and negotiate.’

Otherwise, this team would fall apart.

***

“Hello. Thank you for having us.”
“Oh! Welcome, welcome!”

Perhaps because I’d done well on the trivia quiz, this new program turned out to be a school-themed variety show that had just been created.
I tilted my head slightly upon seeing Choi PD, whose face had become familiar from a few previous appearances.

“Seo Ho-yoon, the school uniform suits you so well! You really look like a student.”

At thirty-three years old, wearing a school uniform—I thought Seo Ho-yoon really had no shame… but I quickly dismissed the thought. After all, celebrities in their fifties, sixties, or beyond would wear anything asked of them, whether it’s a school uniform or a monkey costume.

“This is your first solo variety show, isn’t it?”
“Yes, that’s right.”
“Your first solo variety show being my program—that’s quite an honor, isn’t it? Ha ha!”
“I’m the grateful one, PD. I’ve been watching your detective program from last time quite carefully.”
“Oh, you knew about that? That one was so niche it flopped!”

Despite his innocent-looking face, Choi PD had a reputation for having a twisted personality, which was why his programs were known for being intriguingly crafted.
In other words, he wouldn’t be satisfied with just having a star dressed as a student.

“Since this is our first recording today, I’m naturally nervous myself, but having Seo Ho-yoon and Joo Woo-sung start puts my mind at ease. Especially how much Kim Hee-young was praising Seo Ho-yoon.”

I smiled and quickly changed the subject.

“What about the other guests?”
“They’ll be arriving soon!”

Seeing him smile in that vague way, it became clear this wasn’t just some variety show where we’d chat and laugh in school uniforms. Even in reality variety shows, there’s usually some advance discussion about the concept and how filming will proceed, but this time there was nothing like that.
All they’d said was to move naturally along the predetermined route and act accordingly.
After chatting with Choi PD about various things for a while, I turned my head at the sound of commotion.

“Oh, Joo Woo-sung!”

Just as I thought—it was indeed Joo Woo-sung. He greeted the staff members around him with a bright smile, but when he spotted me, his expression darkened instantly.

“Ugh, Seo Ho-yoon….”
“Hello.”
“Why do I have to do a variety show with you? Why don’t people know you blackmailed me?”
“Why? Would you like them to know?”
“…You’re a bad guy.”

With Joo Woo-sung’s quick situational awareness beside me, I gazed at the school ahead. The set was remarkably realistic.

“You’re appearing on variety shows a lot lately.”
“The view counts are good, that’s why. Something about chemistry with a junior who’s insubordinate… They asked me to guest appear, and if the atmosphere works out, they want you to join the variety show circuit for a while too.”
“I’m pretty busy….”
“What about me? Me, from Black Call?”

Joo Woo-sung grumbled, but my default response to his words was simply to ignore him.

“When’s your comeback, anyway?”
“Just a few weeks left. We still have some music video shooting to do.”
“Yeah? Maybe I should stop by the practice room sometime?”

I suddenly stopped walking and looked at him. Joo Woo-sung scratched his cheek awkwardly at his own words. I asked, somewhat exasperated.

“Living your life that way… haven’t you been scammed yet?”
“What the hell are you saying, seriously…. Chung Beom asked me to help.”
“Huh.”

Lim Hyun-sung really was something. I was fortunate that I was at least a kind of con artist, so Joo Woo-sung and Lim Hyun-sung were truly lucky.

“I appreciate the help, but… it’s fine.”

You’re already helping me plenty anyway.
Without you, there’s no way a rookie like me would’ve made it onto a variety show like this. I turned back to put on my microphone when a familiar alarm bell sound—the kind you’d hear in a school—rang out. Looking ahead, I saw a red light on the camera activate as it began following me and Joo Woo-sung inside. Filming had started. At that moment,

“Hey! You two over there!”

I turned around at the sudden voice.
A sturdy, muscular man in his forties wearing athletic clothes—the very picture of a PE Teacher—was scolding us.

“Why aren’t you two in your classroom!”
“Us?”
“Yeah, you two. Here, write your names on this paper before you go.”

Joo Woo-sung and I, dragged along reluctantly, exchanged a subtle glance. As the paper was thrust forward, Joo Woo-sung instinctively grabbed a pen and scribbled something. I caught a glimpse of what he’d written.

[Always be happy~ Joo Woo-sung]

“What are you doing?”
“Oh, sorry. I signed it out of habit….”

I wondered if this was some kind of variety show bit, but seeing his genuinely blank expression, Joo Woo-sung was serious. He’d surrendered his sense of self to being an idol.

“What’s wrong with you two! Can’t you write properly? And your hair is dyed too….”
“I wrote it properly, sir.”
“…I see. Joo Woo-sung! Come here!”
“Why am I catching the fallout for this?”

Joo Woo-sung, who had been pouting and glancing at me, quickly shifted his expression when the middle-aged man crossed his arms and began to scold him, launching into full-fledged acting mode.

“Aw, teacher~.”

Seeing Joo Woo-sung smile pitifully while frantically bowing with both hands, the middle-aged man flinched. Given Joo Woo-sung’s immense popularity, he seemed afraid of backlash from fans.

“Ahem! Ahem! I was just! Doing my job diligently!”
“….”
“Absolutely! No ill feelings toward this student! Ahem!”
“We’ll be going now.”

To rescue the poor actor, I quickly grabbed Joo Woo-sung and hurried into the designated classroom.

Click.

“….”

Silence.
Pure silence.
Cameras were positioned throughout the classroom, and actors dressed as students sat in neat rows, studying intently.
On the blackboard, the words [Self-Study] were written in large characters.
…What was I supposed to do with this?
For now, I quietly stepped back out of the classroom and glanced at the nameplate on the door.
Second Year, Class 1. Ah, so this was our junior year class.
I could only hear the soft scratching of pencils solving problems. Joo Woo-sung approached cautiously with an awkward expression and sat in an empty seat. I found another vacant spot and took it, then turned to my desk mate.

“Um…”
“Huh, huh?!”
“…?”
“S-Seo Ho-yoon!”

The moment I spoke, he gasped and shot up from his seat, his foot catching on the chair leg as he toppled backward, landing hard on his backside.

“What, what is it? Seo Ho-yoon!”
“…??”

Just as I was about to ask if he was alright, my desk mate pointed at me with trembling fingers and spoke.

“You… you came back from that rebellion fight?”
“….”

What?

“I heard you clashed with the Neighboring High School… but you came back completely unscathed!”

What kind of absurd nonsense was this?
I glanced over at Joo Woo-sung, whose raised eyebrows suggested he was equally bewildered.

“Hey!”
“The Four Great Kings’ Joo Woo-sung is here too!”
“Is this for real?!”

That’s what I wanted to ask.
Starting with my desk mate’s words, the classroom that had been silent moments ago erupted into commotion as if the silence had been a lie.
Joo Woo-sung, a civilian (or rather, a perfect civilian) in truth, shuddered and rubbed his arms.

“What is this…?”

That was when it happened. A sudden gust of wind swept through, and the curtains billowed wildly. As they danced and swayed before settling, Yoo Ji-a—who had been the MC for Shining Star—was now perched on the windowsill.

“The arrival of Lucifer to the school of demons….
1)
”
“….”
“Fascinating, isn’t it?”

1) A line from Episode 5 of the SBS drama The Heirs (aired October 9, 2013 – December 12, 2013).

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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