The Trashy PD Has To Survive as an Idol - Chapter 397

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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397

“Seo Ho-yoon! Over here, over here.”
“Hello.”

With rehearsal starting at 12:30 and the actual filming beginning at 1:30 in the afternoon, I’d spent the entire morning cooped up in the practice room before making an unhurried departure. As I stepped into the public hall of the public broadcasting station, the set came into view—unchanged from what I remembered.

‘Yeah, it’s still the same.’

The regular participants had already arrived and were in rehearsal, operating the buttons according to the staff member’s instructions.

“It’s truly an honor to have a star like you, Seo Ho-yoon.”
“I should be thanking you for the invitation. I heard today’s shoot is a New Year’s special—is that correct?”
“Yes. With the new year and all, the higher-ups wanted to boost the ratings a bit, you know, haha.”

Yang Ju-ri, the PD from the Culture and Education Department who had become the main producer of “David and Goliath” a few years ago, was someone I was meeting face-to-face for the first time, though I’d heard about her through the grapevine.
They said she had a flexible and kind demeanor. Whether that was because I was a fairly well-known guest, I wasn’t sure, but she certainly seemed like a good person.
As I moved toward the waiting room, I engaged in light conversation with her.

“—Usually, once an appearance is confirmed, we only share the guest information the day before, but somehow word got out that you were coming! I thought the website was going to crash! But it’s already too late now, way too late.”
“Ah, so applications were already closed by the time the news spread?”
“Yes, the preliminary screening had already ended. Well, unless those who applied in the preliminary round had come to the location and waited… occasionally someone doesn’t show up on the day, and in those cases, we hold rock-paper-scissors among the companions to select additional participants. So some do get in without going through the preliminary screening.”

I understood.
No matter how many alternates were selected, there were always people who didn’t show up on the day without notice.
When “David and Goliath” first aired, despite our preparations, we were short on participants, and even I—buried under layers of editing work as a newcomer—was forcibly dragged out by a senior to fill in the gaps.
I’d been furious, ready to pocket the prize money and bolt, but the thought of the manager’s nagging and the seniors’ scrutinizing gazes that would follow made me too lazy to deal with it, so I tactfully dropped out midway as a form of social courtesy.
Even after that, I continued solving the problems in my head, and I could answer all of them easily.
Yet the fact that I only received a measly 20,000 won participation prize irritated me all over again.

‘That’s not even enough to buy Seo Ho-jin a decent meal.’

Even though I barely appeared on screen a few times, my personal information and photos were exposed during those brief moments and circulated on SNS for a while.
As I was reflecting on those rather difficult memories, Yang Ju-ri’s voice cut through.

“—You’ve been briefed on the game rules, yes? As a guest, you’ll become David challenging Goliath, and your goal is to survive as long as possible. Even if you become the last one standing and claim the prize money, we’ll be providing separate bonuses to our Goliaths, so don’t worry about your image taking a hit!”
“Haha, do you think I can actually win?”
“Well, I can’t predict that far ahead… but please, survive as long as you can! I really need good footage for this.”

Despite her gentle demeanor, a PD was still a PD—Yang Ju-ri’s eyes gleamed with the intensity of a predator eyeing its prey as she added a final “looking forward to working with you” before leaving the room.
After a brief rehearsal, I spent the remaining time in the waiting room reviewing past questions the staff had provided. Nothing seemed particularly difficult. Most of it was material I already knew.
As I calmly reviewed the content, someone else grew anxious instead, constantly obstructing my view.

Ding!

[Seo Ho-yoon]
[Ugh]
[Aren’t you nervous??]

Finding it not worth responding to, I ignored it, but the System Window continued to flash with brilliant blue light.

[What if you used me as a lifeline?! I can answer anything within my knowledge!]

“Forget it. Just stay quiet.”

At that moment, the System Window, which had been fidgeting and fluttering about, suddenly emitted a crackling noise.
Wondering what was happening now, I narrowed my eyes slightly, but messages appeared in rapid succession, as if panicked.

[Wait a moment, um….]
[…Why….]
[…Over there…]
[…I’ll tell you later.]

And with that, the System Window vanished without a trace.

‘What was that?’

The strange situation left me feeling unsettled, but before I could even begin to investigate what was happening, staff from David and Goliath arrived to inform me it was time to film. Since fulfilling my schedule took priority, I stood up and headed toward the set.
As I waited behind the central VCR screen, Gwak Seo-jung, who had been the MC of David and Goliath for a long time, delivered his opening remarks and called out my name loudly.

“A member of the most popular group these days! Global star The Dun’s Seo Ho-yoon, please come out!”

The screen blocking my path split open to both sides, revealing multiple cameras and numerous participants. With a somewhat bashful, sheepish smile on my face, I walked out slowly, and the cheers grew even louder.

“I must say, this is quite an unfamiliar sight for our broadcast. I’ve listened to The Dun’s music quite frequently, and I never imagined I’d meet Seo Ho-yoon, one of the members, here. It’s truly unexpected. I’m delighted to have you.”

I bowed slightly while meeting the gaze of the camera bathed in red light.

“I’ve been a regular viewer of your program, so it’s an honor to be appearing on it.”
“Haha, I think our viewers today will get to experience both the satisfaction of guessing correctly and the joy of watching.”

Gwak Seo-jung then briefly explained the format of the game.

“…—It’s a multiple-choice quiz with three options. When the question appears on the screen, Goliath chooses the answer first within 30 seconds, and then David solves the quiz through conversation. David can use a total of two phone-a-friend chances while participating in the quiz, so please use them wisely.”

I half-listened to the familiar explanation, but strangely, my cheek began to prickle.

‘What’s this?’

It felt like someone’s sharp gaze was piercing me like a needle.
It was far too persistent and cutting to be mere curious eyes directed at a famous entertainer.

“‘David and Goliath’ starting now!”

But before I could even glance around, the first question flowed from Gwak Seo-jung’s lips.
It was asking what the ‘K’ in K-POP stood for. The options were Korean, Key, and Kogiri. Goliath chose first, and then it was my turn.

“…Number one, Korean.”

I quickly pressed the correct answer and glanced at Gwak Seo-jung.

“Could it be that option three means elephant?”
“Haha! The writers really do come up with wild ideas, don’t they?”

As I asked with bewilderment, Gwak Seo-jung burst into laughter.

“Our maknae’s new nickname is elephant, so if he saw this, he’d probably be thrilled.”

At this point, it seemed to go well beyond just coming up with wild ideas.
Either way, it wasn’t bad for me. Besides, they’d perfectly set up an opportunity to promote a member—it would’ve been foolish to pass it up. I curved the corners of my eyes gracefully and gratefully mentioned Jung Da-jun.

“Now for stage two! What do we call a high angle in Korean? Option one: bird’s-eye view, option two—….”
“Correct, option one. Bird’s-eye view.”

Gwak Seo-jung confirmed the Staff Member’s gesture and moved on to the next quiz. Having swiftly answered stage two as well, I decided to pull out one of the plans I’d prepared in advance for stage three.

“Alright, stage three.”

[How many white keys are on a standard 88-key piano?
1: 48 2: 52 3: 53]

As Gwak Seo-jung’s calm voice read the question, the problem and options appeared on the VCR screen.

“Wow, this one’s tough, isn’t it? Unless you’re really interested in pianos, it’d be hard to know. Seo Ho-yoon, what about you? Do you have any hobbies or interests in pianos or instruments?”
“Haha, unfortunately my members are more into it and more talented than I am….”

I scratched the back of my neck sheepishly and spoke with an awkward smile.

“Could I use the phone lifeline?”
“Right now?! You’re using it quickly!”

Since I might as well get good screen time out of it.
I tugged at the corners of my mouth slightly, then returned it to normal before asking the Production Crew to connect me to Kang Yi-chae through my phone.
After a few rings, a low, heavy voice resonated through the filming location.

[Yes, hello?]
“Kang Yi-chae?”
[What? It’s Seo Ho-yoon? Kang Yi-chae isn’t here right now. The Maknae said he needed whipped cream, so he went to the mart.]
“…Whipped cream?”

The voice didn’t sound like Kang Yi-chae at all, so I questioned him, and sure enough, it was Kim Sung-hyun. My plan had gone slightly off track, but since the question itself didn’t really depend on who answered, it didn’t matter much. Whether it was the work studio or the dormitory, there was an electronic piano that Kang Yi-chae had set up.

“Ah, Kim Sung-hyun, anyway, I’m going to ask you something….”
[What? Wait, hold on, Jung Da-jun! Stop! You can’t put that in!! Seo Ho-yoon, I need to go stop the Maknae, so if you have something to say, say it quick, quick!]

…Right.
Stopping Jung Da-jun was important too.
With a premonition that tonight I’d probably only be able to eat water again, I opened my mouth once more.

“Got it, Hyun-sung, I’ll just ask the question. On a standard 88-key piano….”
[Waaaaahhh!!]
[Noooo!!!]

Two pairs of screams erupted. All the civilian participants assigned to Goliath wore stunned, blank expressions.

“…Phew….”

Even in this fleeting moment, precious seconds were ticking away. I suppressed my anxiety and took a shallow breath, waiting for the situation beyond the phone to settle.

[Ugh, ah! S-sorry! So Seo Ho-yoon, what were you—?]
“I need the number of white keys on a standard 88-key piano….”

At Kim Sung-hyun’s questioning voice, I thought things might finally be okay and tried to match the leftmost white key scale with the rightmost white key scale, but—.

[Kyaaaa! Brother, brother, brother, brother, brother!!! A pillar of fire shot up from the frying pan!!]
[No, no, put it out! Put it out!! Wait, get out… Aaahhh!!]
“…The white key scale on the far left and….”
[Sniff! Hyun-sung, I was so scared!]
[I was scared too….]
“….”
[Ah! Seo Ho-yoon, sorry. What were you trying to say—.]

Click.

The moment the timer hit zero, the call cut off sharply. The chaotic filming location fell silent in an instant.

“Pfft….”
“….”

Instead, suppressed laughter began leaking from Gwak Seo-jung. He continued speaking with his teeth clenched.

“…Heh, hehehem… Well, Seo Ho-yoon, that concludes your first phone chance.”
“…Hahahaha.”

I recalled that multiple cameras were recording right now and tried to compose myself by closing my eyes tightly for a moment before opening them again.

“It seems you didn’t tell the members beforehand. Wasting your phone chance like this—are you okay with that? It was supposed to be a check-in call.”
“I couldn’t remember if I’d turned off the gas properly when leaving the dormitory, so I decided to call and check….”
“Ahaha, well then, it seems you did the right thing. It did look dangerous. Truly unfortunate, but now it’s time to choose an answer. Will you make your decision?”

At this rate, it might end up on the cutting room floor.
If it were Dae Pa-sung, I wouldn’t care, but WH Entertainment was meticulous about their artists’ public image. Still, if I played my cards right, Lee Ji-hyun might push to keep it in.
Exposing the Members was one of my objectives anyway.
Part of my mind measured the camera angles that would capture us on broadcast, while another part searched for answers to the problem.
My index finger tapped against the table—tap, tap—touching and lifting in rhythm.
One octave consisted of seven white keys and five black keys. An 88-key piano could contain a maximum of seven octaves, with four remaining keys beyond that.
Simple calculation: white keys would be at least 49, and adding the remaining four would give a maximum of 53. But considering octave composition, 53 white keys could never actually occur….

“…The answer is number 2. I’ll go with 52 white keys.”
“Number 2, 52 keys! May I ask why you chose that answer?”

Exhausted from explaining, I condensed and delivered my reasoning as concisely as possible, only to receive an embarrassingly exaggerated reaction in return.

“Wow, Seo Ho-yoon! You calculated that far in such a short time? That’s truly impressive!”
“Haha, thank you.”

It was painfully obvious they were heaping on praise just to pad the runtime.
They didn’t need to bother. I’d perform well regardless.
For now, I responded with outward humility.

“Correct answer, number 3.”
“I’ll choose number 1.”
“Number 3.”

With each successive round, the difficulty of the questions gradually increased. Of course, it made little difference to me.

“Uh, um….”

Even Gwak Seo-jung, who was supposed to be the one shining, looked flustered.

‘But these are way too easy.’

If I were the PD, I would’ve hunted down the staff member who designed the quiz and given them an earful. The question topics were easily deducible once you became familiar with the program format.

“…Seo Ho-yoon, you really know your nursery rhymes well!”

That was simply because rotating through various departments as a substitute meant I’d handled nursery rhyme-related work at least once.

“And foreign word notation rules too??”

Spending all that time locked in the editing room adding subtitles meant I’d inevitably grown accustomed to the notation conventions—whether I liked it or not—while listening to my seniors’ affectionate curses.

“Even common knowledge quizzes?”

Common knowledge quizzes were something any entertainment PD naturally had to memorize….

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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