The Trashy PD Has To Survive as an Idol - Chapter 265

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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265

“What’s wrong?”

I felt Seo Ho-jin watching me with concern, sensing that something was amiss with how the situation was unfolding.
I didn’t have the confidence to meet his gaze, so I turned my head away slightly.

We’re the same age.
You and I are the same age….

“Ha ha. Aha ha.”

Damn it….

“Why, why are you like that?”

That single question answered everything about who ‘Seo Ho-jin’ was right now.
His expression, his tone of voice, the trembling in his eyes, the subtle tremor at his fingertips—all of it attested to the truth.
It wasn’t mockery. It wasn’t a lie.
No. Seo Ho-jin would never go this far with me.

“…Brother, are you okay?”

In the end, the Seo Ho-jin before my eyes had,

“…No.”

forgotten everything—that I had been a PD, that I’d become ten years younger, that I was here working as an idol to reclaim my original life.
I closed my eyes tightly for a moment, then opened them and laughed as playfully as I could manage.

“—I was just asking because some guy’s younger sibling has been acting out so much lately.”

Acting was nothing difficult.
Seo Ho-jin stared at me, unable to find words.

“You brat, same age my ass—we’re nearly a year apart. Once you’re my junior, you’re my junior forever.”

As I added that I needed to straighten out our brotherly hierarchy, Seo Ho-jin hesitantly waved his hand and opened his mouth, a beat too late.

“O-of course I think of you as my brother! It’s just that you—.”

He kept repeating the word “brother” as he rambled on, but every word simply brushed past my ears.
I just wanted to get out of here and clear my head.
Then,

Zzzzzt,

my phone vibrated in my pocket.

“…Ah, must be the Manager calling. I should go.”
“What? Already?”
“Yeah, I have a meeting with the Planning Team because of the comeback.”

I tossed out the excuse that came to mind and turned to leave, but Seo Ho-jin urgently grabbed my arm.

“Brother, brother. Wait just a—…!”
“…!”

And in that instant, without thinking, I yanked my arm away.
I was startled, and Seo Ho-jin looked shocked too.

‘Damn it.’

Seo Ho-jin’s hand stopped short, suspended awkwardly in mid-air. His eyes were wide open.

“…I’m going.”

I tore my gaze away from his lingering eyes and stepped outside with heavy feet.
It was a pathetic way to handle it, but I couldn’t think of another way to fix it, and I didn’t have the energy to try.

The ground visible beneath the brim of the hat I’d pulled down to hide my face swam before my eyes.
I pressed the hat down harder and quickened my pace, when the sound of a camera shutter clicked behind me, accompanied by hushed voices.

“What? Hey, isn’t that Seo Ho-yoon?”
“I think it is?!”
“Come on, hurry up and take a picture.”

I quickly ducked my head and waved my arm to flag down a taxi.

“Here? Is this the right spot?”
“Yes.”

I gave the address and leaned back against the seat.
Seo Ho-jin’s voice continued to buzz around my ears.

“You’re the same age.”

‘Why? What on earth is this about?’

I buried my face in my hands and curled up, when something suddenly tapped my shoulder.

“Kid, are you okay? Does something hurt? Do you need to go to the hospital?”

I lowered my hands and looked up to find the Taxi Driver watching me with concern.
Only then did I realize I was breathing heavily.

“Kid?”
“Yes, I’m fine….”

Familiar streets passed by the window.

“I’m okay.”

I pulled out my wallet and handed over whatever bills I could grab, then got out of the car.
I didn’t even properly register the driver calling out to keep the change as I headed toward the Dormitory.

Beep, beep beep, beep beep beep—….

“Gasp, huff….”

Beep, beep….

“Ugh….”

My fingers slipped several times as I punched in the entrance door’s passcode.
A moment later, remembering I had a card key, I fumbled through my pocket, found it, and finally managed to push inside.

“Calm down, calm down….”

I needed to calm myself.
The dormitory was dim, with all the windows blocked by curtains, allowing only a murky twilight to filter through—no one appeared to be home.
I clenched my trembling hands tightly.
Seo Ho-jin’s voice still echoed around me like a double chorus.

‘Why can’t I remember?’

As I wrestled with the question, searching for an answer that wouldn’t come, I found myself unconsciously scratching at my ear again and again.
Seo Ho-jin was the only being in this world who remembered me as whole.
Because he remembered, I had convinced myself I wasn’t losing my mind.

And today, the very foundation of my existence had vanished.

Was I truly going insane?

‘I’m fine. I’m perfectly fine.’

The moment blood began to seep from my fingertips as I scraped away the skin of my ear, Seo Ho-jin’s innocent face asking me that question flashed through my mind.
Seo Ho-jin….
But then again.

‘Is he really Seo Ho-jin?’

Was that boy without memories truly my brother?
Disjointed thoughts spiraled endlessly, burrowing into my entire being, clinging like poison.
Just as my emotions surged to the breaking point,

“Ho-yoon, why aren’t you picking up your―.”

The entrance door behind me swung open, and Kang Yi-chae stepped inside.

“Kang Yi-chae.”

Startled by my sudden flinch, he blinked once, then shifted his gaze from my ears to my hands before pushing me along and dragging me into the bedroom.

“Yi-chae….”

I never wanted the other members to see me like this. I forced the corners of my mouth upward and tried to say something—anything—but no words would leave my lips.
After seating me on the bed, he let out a short sigh, then stepped into the living room and closed the door behind him.

“….”

Thanks to that, my mind cleared a little.
Soon after, I heard the other members arriving at the dormitory.

“Huh? Yi-chae’s cleaning?”
“Our beautiful cleaning fairy has arrived~!”
“Wow, the sun must be rising in the west today. Where did Seo Ho-yoon go?”

A brief silence hung in the air before Kang Yi-chae’s cheerful voice continued.

“…Ho-yoon’s condition isn’t great. He’s resting in his room.”
“Ah, okay.”
“He’s been pushing himself. Lately.”
“Then should we all clean the living room together?!”

I understood well that this was their way of being considerate.
I spent a long time just touching my forehead before lying down on the bed.

“…I’m losing it.”

I didn’t want to think about anything anymore.

‘I don’t know.’

I just wanted to be alone.
I despised myself.

On the other hand, I wondered if the current situation—where I could believe that my brother’s only job was being an idol—might be better for Seo Ho-jin. Better than watching my brother, who had been absorbed into his own game and was forced to be an idol just to return to the original world.
Besides, even if Seo Ho-jin had lost his memory, wouldn’t everything be resolved once he completed all the scenarios and quests and returned?

‘But what if he went back and it still wasn’t resolved?’

No, honestly, I’m not even sure if I can go back anymore.
I couldn’t distinguish what was real and what was part of the System’s scenarios.

“…Am I losing my mind?”

What if all of this was just the delusion of a madman—me alone?
What if even the moment I thought I died was just a dream of my fractured mind?

“Damn it….”

What if I’m not Seo Ho-yoon?

Ding!

Just as those thoughts consumed me, a familiar sound pierced through.

[You didn’t go crazy.]

I lifted my eyes, and the familiar blue light flickered before me.

[System loading….]
[System loading….]
[System loading….]
[System loading….]
[——————….]
[——————….]
[…—————….]
[…—————….]
[…————….]
[…————….]
[…—————….]
[…—————….]
[…——————.]
[System synchronization complete.]
[System compensation for instability has been granted.]
[100,000 points have been awarded.]

Fireworks burst and crackled beside the System Window.

[Ugh! I’m so sorry! Please don’t be angry. I’m truly sorry. It’s not that I set off the fireworks—it was just configured that way from the start…. No, wait, that’s not it.]

As I sat watching, a new window materialized before me.

[Microphone test, microphone test. Is everything displaying without errors?]

When no response came, the System Window—its saturation cranked higher—displayed another message.

[It’s been so long. Won’t you respond?]

The light flickered sheepishly.

[Have you lost your mind? That’s not like you, Seo Ho-yoon. Pull yourself together. You’ve never lost your mind before.]

“Yeah….”

I gave a half-hearted reply, watching the System Window scatter like a sigh.

[I’m serious—otherwise, why would knowledge from your PD days still remain?]

Maybe I have lost my mind, I countered silently.

[Besides, there’s clear evidence in Seo Ho-yoon’s wallet that you haven’t lost your mind!]

My lips twitched slightly.

“….”

I lifted my slumped body and reached for the book on the bedside table. Tilting it, I flipped through the pages rapidly until fragments of a family photo appeared—pieced together carefully.
In place of the family photo that had vanished when my age changed in this place, there it was: the family photo Seo Ho-jin had made for me.

[If Seo Ho-yoon had lost your mind, how could that still be there?]

The breath that had been suffocating my chest finally broke free.

“…You’re right. I guess I haven’t lost my mind yet.”

Yet my mind still refused to turn over, refused to contemplate any of this.
I wanted to do nothing at all.

“Thank God for that, damn it.”

The moment I lay back down on the bed, the System Window flooded me with messages.

[Why do you look like you’re dying? Did you lose your memory of your brother?]

The System Window, which had been silent until now, had just sent an alert that synchronization was complete—but how did it know my brother’s memory had vanished?
Realizing the answer immediately, I let out a bitter laugh.

“Did you enjoy the show?”

[…No, not really. It’s just that seeing you act unlike yourself is genuinely worrying.]

I just wished it would shut up already.
But even voicing that felt too tedious and repugnant.
Just as I was about to close my eyes and surrender to sleep, pushing everything else away,

[There’s a way.]

My body stiffened, freezing in place.

[There’s exactly one way to restore Seo Ho-jin’s memory.]
[But it requires an enormous amount of points.]
[Even though you received a substantial reward from the destabilization earlier, it won’t be nearly enough to cover it!]

I fixed my gaze on the System Window as it hurled the message at me, as if deliberately provoking me.

[Are you confident?]

Gradually, my mind began to turn again.
While trying my best to conceal my desperation, it displayed the window as if it knew exactly what I was feeling.

[ RESET
A chance to start over from the beginning ]

Beneath the glittering button, small text displayed the required points.

[It’s a reset.]

Damn bastard.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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