The Murderous Duke's Domestic Affairs - Chapter 48

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 48
I was utterly exhausted. Inside the carriage on our way back, I leaned against the seat and sprawled across it. The intoxication from the alcohol jelly had faded somewhat, but whether from excessive tension or something else, I couldn’t muster the strength to move even a fingertip. The fourteen-year-old Imperial Princess had eaten it without any difficulty, so it was surely just a very weak jelly made with alcohol. The intensity of the drunkenness was undoubtedly amplified by my nerves.
“No more alcohol for you.”
Aster Veil Lilywood draped a blanket from the side of the carriage over my exposed shoulders, his lips twisting slightly. I studied him quietly. Certainly, now that we had left the Imperial Palace, he seemed more at ease.
“Do I really have to? I’m an adult.”
“If you really want to drink, do it when we’re alone together.”
At Aster’s sullen remark, I burst out laughing. That was exactly what a real husband would say. Of course, the fact that he was my real husband was an undeniable truth.
In any case, thanks to Aster’s attitude, the Emperor had completely believed our claim that we “loved each other.” It was fortunate, but somehow it hurt. Perhaps because I knew all too well that we didn’t truly love each other.
“I thought you might ram Abarid.”
Aster murmured while gazing out the carriage window. Wondering if he was speaking to me, I tilted my head curiously. Since there was no one else in the carriage but him and me, he was surely speaking to me.
“Me?”
At my question, Aster nodded. His deep, settled green eyes directed straight at me were pleasant. At the Imperial Palace, he had seemed like someone with lowered eyes, his senses shut away.
“Don’t say such ridiculous things. How could I do that?”
“Who knows? Maybe you stepped on his foot without anyone seeing.”
At Aster’s words, I burst into laughter. I really wished I had. The Crown Prince, Abarid’s gaze was so uncomfortable that it made people uneasy. But he was the Crown Prince, after all.
“At the next ball, I should dance with him on purpose.”
That way, I could naturally step on his foot. I’d step on him hard with the sharp heel. He seemed to want to appear as a good person to others, so at least he wouldn’t say anything to me.
Aster looked down at me with furrowed brows and a mischievous smile.
My violet eyes sparkled as I looked up at him, asking why. It was just my imagination. Aster couldn’t avoid her gaze directed straight at him. No, this was surely because of the streetlight shining through the carriage window.
“Don’t dance with that bastard.”
So I ended up saying such a thing, and it was all because of the streetlight reflecting in her eyes. Aster turned his head sharply, looking not at Lauren’s eyes but at the streetlight shining beyond the carriage window.
But the light reflected through the glass was far dimmer than what shone in Lauren’s eyes. Was it an illusion? I wanted to look at her eyes once more, but if I did, I would confess everything—my heart, my situation—to her. Please, save me.
I couldn’t do that. Aster clenched the fist resting on his knee. I had not become a person capable of loving someone. Even if such feelings arose, I would have to bury them in my chest for the rest of my life. I needed to come to my senses. I muttered to myself.
“Aster.”
Lauren called my name. But I stubbornly refused to turn my head, only gazing out the window. Still, I focused on her voice reaching my ears. It was as soft and tender as she herself was.
“Aster, can I ask what you meant by that?”
Ah. I sighed quietly and squeezed my eyes shut. Lauren was intelligent. She observed others well. How easily would she understand my heart? I couldn’t reveal this shallow, constantly wavering thing. For Lauren’s sake. And for my own sake too.
“No.”
At my brief answer, Lauren closed her mouth as well. I had deliberately cut it short because she hadn’t expected an answer. She must be tired of it by now. But it was the best answer I could give. I glared at the scenery flowing past the carriage window. Like my heart, it was useless once it passed.
* * *
There was no place more comfortable for the two of us to be together than the Office. For me, who had to hide my heart, and for her, who couldn’t do anything about her feelings constantly turning toward me, it was the same. And there was no better place to discuss what had happened at the Imperial Palace.
Lauren went to change her clothes. I instructed Calvin Stewart, who had followed me to attend to my needs, to bring tea and alcohol, then pulled off my cravat.
Lauren, dressed in a shoulder-baring gown and adorned with glittering jewels, was breathtakingly beautiful, yet she clearly looked uncomfortable—far more so than in the formal attire I wore.
My gaze turned to the jacket I had removed. The navy formal coat embroidered with gold thread matched Lauren’s dress. The transparent sapphire she had adorned it with made her violet eyes appear even more blue. Like the sky I had wanted to throw myself into every time I fled during my difficult childhood—so blue.
I pulled down the ribbon tying my hair. Then I ran my fingers through my own locks. I shouldn’t be thinking such foolish things. I needed to keep my head cold. Only then could I accomplish what I had resolved to do. I shook my head vigorously, as if trying to expel everything inside.
Lauren entered the Office just after Calvin had set down the drinks and left the room. Perhaps because it was late enough that going straight to the Bedroom wouldn’t be strange, she wore quite light clothing. Beneath a gown that had grown heavier with the approach of autumn, I could see delicate, butterfly-like sleeping clothes.
What was Lise thinking, dressing her in such clothes? I chuckled and sat in the long chair, filling my glass. Today had been truly long and exhausting. I thought how happy I would be if I could fall asleep for even a moment, intoxicated by alcohol.
Her eyebrows furrowed at the sight of the alcohol bottle. She seemed to have much to say, but she didn’t open her mouth about it. Instead, she plopped down across from me and extended her finger, pointing at the bottle.
“Give me some of that too.”
Now it was my turn for my eyebrows to furrow. That woman was weak with alcohol and clearly didn’t know how dangerous it was. An anguished sound escaped between my lips.
“I told you not to drink.”
“You said it was fine when we’re alone together.”
Aster Veil Lilywood sighed softly and poured a small amount of liquor into the empty glass. He should have instructed them to bring something weaker and sweeter. The alcohol he drank was far too strong for her delicate constitution.
He wished Lauren wouldn’t drink at all. Once alcohol entered her system, she became far too beautiful, laughed far too readily. His reluctance stemmed not merely from concern for Lauren’s health, but from his own mental fortitude as well.
“Are you planning to become a drunkard?”
“Surely not. A little drink like this won’t make me one.”
“One never knows.”
Aster Veil Lilywood pouted petulantly and settled back into his chair, his own glass in hand, watching as the golden liquid touched Lauren’s lips.
Her lips, unadorned by cosmetics, gleamed with their natural radiance—a pristine, delicate crimson. The sensation of those soft lips returned to him, from when he’d fed her finger foods earlier.
Soft, smooth, supple. His gaze fixed upon Lauren’s lips alone. How tender and sweet would it be to press his own lips against hers? Though he did not indulge in sweetness, he knew he would be utterly helpless against the sweetness of her lips.
Aster Veil Lilywood’s eyes narrowed. Why did such thoughts keep assailing him? He wished to incinerate his own mind. He drained his glass in one gulp and set the empty cup down upon the table with force.
The crystal struck the wood with a sharp, piercing sound. If only that sound could pierce his own chest, he thought. Then perhaps he could forget everything that shook him—whether it was Lauren or Blaze Lilywood.
“Aster.”
Lauren called his name in reproach as she watched him drain a considerable amount of liquor in one breath. Aster Veil Lilywood sighed and dragged a hand across his face. He felt as though he’d regressed to his childhood, when he could not master his own emotions.
It was a thought he’d repeated countless times, but this could not continue. He needed to properly recount what had transpired at the Imperial Palace. Clamping his lips shut, he refilled his glass and straightened his posture. He could not help but notice Lauren’s eyes narrowing in disapproval.
“…Bear with me. Today was exhausting.”
He muttered with a bitter smile. Since it was undeniably true, Lauren found herself unable to protest further. When she fell silent, Aster Veil Lilywood released a low, relieved sigh.
Yes, it had been exhausting. Throughout the entire dinner, Abarid had glared at him relentlessly, while the oblivious Emperor had continued to engage him in conversation. And the Imperial Princess had remained thoroughly withdrawn, unable even to lift her head.
That alone would have been enough to fray his nerves, but apparently it was insufficient. When he and Lauren had emerged from the Emperor’s audience chamber, he’d been genuinely startled by a sharp cry that pierced the air.
Who would dare raise their voice so loudly directly beside the Emperor’s audience chamber? His gaze naturally turned toward the source. When he looked, he found the Emperor’s two children there.
Brother and sister dressed identically in white garments trimmed with gold, yet their circumstances were entirely opposite. Abarid, fully matured with not a single hair out of place, was shouting with such excitement that the skin beneath his eyes had flushed crimson. Standing before him, the Crown Prince’s sister hung her head with one cheek swollen red, merely enduring Abarid’s verbal assault.
Her hands, loosely clasped and hanging limp, trembled visibly. Yet the Imperial Princess did not weep. Her downcast golden eyes appeared to swallow the pain.
Lauren recalled that moment and furrowed her brow. “Nothing ever goes right because of you,” or “You can’t do anything properly.”
She’d wondered if the Imperial Princess had made some mistake during the meal, but there had been nothing of the sort. Listening carefully to understand what he was saying, she heard him accuse her of “failing to properly seduce Aster.” Was that something one ordinarily said to a sibling? To a younger sister with twice the age gap at that?
Lauren was an only child. Therefore, she did not truly understand the hearts of “older brothers” or those “who had older brothers.” Yet even recalling Dale and Delania Siaz, the closest siblings she knew, such a thing had never occurred. They might pass each other with indifference, but never thus.
She’d looked at Aster Veil Lilywood in disbelief. But his expression mirrored her own bewilderment. After all, he too was an only child, so he likely understood no better than she did. Lauren clicked her tongue without realizing it.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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