Pretending to Be Human Is Exhausting Again Today - Chapter 38

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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Pretending to Be Human: Episode 038

The Emperor frowned, displeased by my composed demeanor.

“So you have no intention of explaining what prompted this change?”

“I’m still uncertain what Your Majesty means. Perhaps it merely appears that I’ve matured with age?”

“You were already a sensible child back then.”

“I may have grown further still. Do you recall how many years have passed since we first met as father and daughter?”

“Hmph.”

The Emperor clicked his tongue in exasperation.

“Do you truly believe I’ve overlooked a single second of your conduct?”

‘Of course you’ve been watching everything. You have a compulsive need for control.’

I spoke knowing full well. A man like him would certainly have placed spies throughout the Separate Palace.

Though even with all his surveillance, he could never have discovered the truth of my reincarnation.

“You don’t intend to claim you changed merely from facing death, do you? Over some mere poison….”

“Mere?”

But I could not let that remark pass. I narrowed my eyes, fixing them upon the Emperor’s arrogant visage.

“Your Majesty, death transforms everything. Life and death are not merely a turning point.”

“Do you think I’m ignorant of such things? The hollow justifications of those who speak of facing death with resolve, of staking their very lives….”

“No, Your Majesty. You do not understand.”

I stepped closer to him, meeting his gaze directly so that he would hear my words to their end.

“Those who have truly witnessed the end of life do not speak of death carelessly. They do not stake their lives. Because they know that what awaits at that threshold is utterly hollow, they cling desperately to existence merely to avoid reaching it.”

My reflection flickered in the Emperor’s blue eyes. I spoke to that reflection, as though making a vow to myself.

“That is precisely why the experience of death—death standing before one’s eyes—changes everything. It matters not whether one is a beggar in the street or a sage. The terrible certainty that tomorrow’s sun will not rise for you—those who have never faced it cannot comprehend it.”

On the Battlefield, death was commonplace. A comrade with whom I had just shared rations, another who had asked me about breakfast that very morning—in an instant, they became corpses. That was the Battlefield.

Death was a future both common yet weighty, weighty yet unforgettable.

Asmodina, and Deina—I had experienced it twice over myself.

And so I did not speak of death carelessly.

“…How dare you lecture me on ignorance.”

“We are all ignorant. Even if we understand death, we remain ignorant of life until the very end—such is the nature of humanity.”

Even the sages of the Demon Clan, who live for centuries and millennia, do not claim omniscience. How then could a mere human, who lives less than a century, presume to speak with such authority?

I lifted the corners of my mouth in a slight smile and spoke.

“If Your Majesty perceives that I have changed, perhaps it truly is because of death. I have learned that trivial threats and minor accidents do not kill one.”

“Do you regard them as insignificant?”

“Hardly. Rather, I am the insignificant one, failing even in my duties as a member of the Imperial Family. A mere sibling quarrel is hardly grand enough to warrant discourse on death.”

My conflict with Franz was something like a contrived theatrical performance. A predetermined confrontation, a scripted argument—nothing of consequence.

The Emperor’s suspicion likely stemmed from my unexpected victory over Franz.

‘Though I take no joy in defeating that fool.’

I took a step back from him.

“I became overexcited because I had feared death so greatly. I humbly beg your forgiveness.”

“Hmph, you speak well. You know full well that I will not divulge this conversation.”

‘Indeed. You would never expose a tale that tarnishes the honor of the Imperial Family.’

I smiled faintly, and the Emperor flicked his hand as if thoroughly exasperated.

“You were always like that. You had a cunning side, pretending otherwise.”

‘If you recall memories so fondly, why didn’t you treat me well before?’

A complaint nearly escaped my lips, but I barely managed to suppress it.

“I had hoped for a more substantive answer, but it cannot be helped. I shall inquire about this matter again at a later time.”

“…Are you not curious about how I survived the brink of death, or how I regained my health?”

“Foolish question. What good is interrogating someone about facts that weren’t even revealed as a spy? You’ll only offer pathetic excuses regardless.”

He scoffed, clearly unwilling to engage in tedious riddles.

‘It seems he has no intention of pressing further or investigating for now.’

Though his swift abandonment of the matter still struck me as suspicious, it was fortunate for me. At least I had one less concern to worry about.

“In any case, I commend you for concluding the Arena event successfully. You managed it well despite the Empress’s interference.”

“You were aware of it, then? Then regarding Loreil’s matter as well…”

“Did I not say I dislike pointless questions? Do you think I would be ignorant of such things?”

‘Of course you would be.’

Thoroughly exasperated, I decided against asking any further questions.

“As a reward, I grant you the freedom to return to High Society as you desired, along with unrestricted access to the Imperial Palace. From now on, go where you wish and do as you please.”

“Thank you.”

Spoken so casually that it seemed like no great privilege, yet it held profound meaning for me. From this moment forward, I would be treated as a member of the Imperial Family wherever I went.

‘At last, I have taken a step forward.’

I clenched my fist inwardly, savoring the sense of accomplishment, when the Emperor continued speaking.

“Since it has come to this, I shall require one more task of you. Spring is still far off before the next High Society gathering opens, so you have ample time.”

“What task might that be, Your Majesty?”

“Across the sea, the Princess of Jins Kingdom intends to seek asylum within the Empire. I require you to receive her upon arrival and oversee her introduction to the Empire.”

“Asylum?”

My eyes widened at this unexpected revelation.

‘Jins Kingdom? But they’re a nation we trade with regularly. They’re seeking asylum here?’

Seeing my bewilderment, the Emperor continued his explanation.

“A rebellion has erupted in Jins Kingdom. The King has been deposed, and all his children have either perished or sought asylum. Our Empire has agreed to receive the Princess.”

“I had not expected such benevolence from you, Your Majesty.”

“Benevolence? This is purely a transaction. We have already secured our gains.”

In other words, the Empire had already extracted sufficient benefit to justify accepting an asylum seeker.

Yet becoming entangled with an asylum seeker would inevitably invite gossip and scrutiny, so I expressed my reluctance.

“I do not believe this is a task suited to me, Your Majesty. Particularly given that this asylum stems from rebellion—the Jins Kingdom immigrants within the Empire would surely…”

The Emperor cut short my attempt to defer the matter by feigning illness.

“Of course, I shall provide compensation. This task extends beyond what I would ordinarily demand of a Princess in exchange for her return to High Society.”

That much was obvious. This request transcended the bounds of political duty expected of a Princess.

Yet the compensation he offered exceeded even my imagination.

“I shall grant you a Manor.”

“…I beg your pardon?”

“One Direct Dominion remains. I shall entrust the administration of that Manor to you, as I have done for your elder brothers.”

A Manor—in other words, he was granting me land to govern.

I found myself speechless at such an extraordinary reward.

It was not uncommon for Imperial Family members to oversee the Emperor’s Direct Dominion. Franz and his younger brothers each had territories under their administration.

However, such responsibilities fell exclusively to princes. Never once had a princess been entrusted with governance.

‘He’s suddenly granting me a Direct Dominion? No, that can’t be right. This must be….’

I immediately grasped the Emperor’s true intention.

“Jeina received one as well, didn’t she?”

That Emperor would never single me out for special treatment. The question sprang from that certainty.

“Clever, aren’t you? Yes, that’s right. Jeina already received a far superior Manor.”

The Emperor’s lips curved upward in amusement. At his cunning tone, I ground my teeth inwardly.

“An opportunity arose at year’s end, and I purged all the corrupt administrators. As a result, several Direct Dominions fell vacant. I’ve been short-handed, and it seemed I’d need someone like you.”

“If you were going to grant it regardless, it hardly seems an appropriate compensation.”

“Which would you prefer—somewhere near the Neutral Zone, far from the Capital, or somewhere close to the Capital?”

Like a merchant haggling over prices, he presented me with a choice between a thorny path and a paved road.

I exhaled a weary sigh and nodded.

“I accept your command, Your Majesty.”

Still, a Direct Dominion was better than nothing. At the very least, it meant I would have a foothold outside the Imperial Palace.

The Emperor seemed pleased with my response, his lips curving upward. But I was smiling as well.

‘With land of my own, I’ll be free to act without worrying about the Temple’s scrutiny.’

He likely had no idea that real Demons would soon appear in his Direct Dominion.

The Unnamed Man and I exchanged knowing smiles, each celebrating our own distinct victories.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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