I’m Sick of the Kind Protagonist, so I Might as Well Just Die - Chapter 48

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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#48
When I opened my eyes again, I lay in absolute darkness. No light, no sound, no scent—not even that cloying rose fragrance, not the curse clawing through my mind, not those piercing gazes that had felt like needles from every direction.
‘The Dark Space.’
“Wow, thank goodness!”
Before I could even sit up, a familiar voice greeted me. I turned my head to find Bilateia Fernichiosa Venisike crouched beside me, suddenly flopping backward onto the floor with a long, relieved sigh.
“I was gambling on whether we’d return to the Dark Space or not, and we ended up here! God, I’m so relieved!”
The woman in the ornate dress lay sprawled across the ground, giving me a thumbs up. She had the same face as the Bilateia I’d seen in the bathhouse, but here she radiated genuine relief instead of that inscrutable, calculating gaze.
“…Why are you here?”
“Why? Because I was waiting for you to come, you idiot!”
“….”
“Anyway, we don’t have much time, so listen carefully.”
She suddenly sat up and gripped my shoulders tightly, lowering her voice. Even though no one was watching or listening, Bilateia dropped her voice even further.
“The Ancient Gods threw bait at us on the terrace earlier.”
“Ah….”
“What? You’re not surprised? Did you hear the Ancient Gods’ voices too?”
“No, Perenustus told me. He said the Ancient Gods would try to contact Leonas Hagpethar Yuletanis and Bilateia Fernichiosa Venisike, so I shouldn’t trust anyone but him.”
“Wow, the professor.”
“So he created this stage to see directly how the gods would act.”
Bilateia Fernichiosa Venisike pressed her lips together and nodded, then clicked her tongue.
“Both the professor and the Ancient Gods are annoying.”
“Yeah. Me too.”
We shared the same feelings about the same people in that moment of silence, and then we smiled at each other as if by agreement.
“So, what did the gods say?”
“Remember when light came from my palm as I pressed down on your head?”
How could I forget? I nodded, and she extended her hand toward me.
“I think that light affects you and the professor. Think about it—when Leonas Hagpethar Yuletanis took you away, and when I pressed your head underwater, you couldn’t resist, right? You and the professor aren’t people who get pushed around just because someone pushes.”
“Hmm….”
“Ever since I received this light, my palm has felt like something’s pulling from inside. It’s not a pleasant sensation.”
As I listened, my thoughts raced. The Ancient Gods hadn’t simply gifted a portion of their power to their creations. My expression hardened, and Bilateia Fernichiosa Venisike nodded.
“It’s like how you control a puppet with strings, you know? That’s exactly what this feels like.”
“….”
“No matter what good conditions they offer, I have no intention of acting like a puppet on strings. The problem is….”
“Leonas Hagpethar Yuletanis fell for it?”
“Seems like it. That idiot got blinded by all the glittering illusions….”
Bilateia Fernichiosa Venisike let out a long sigh.
“I think he’s planning to actually sacrifice you and cut the professor’s throat. So be careful. As long as we have this kind of power in our hands, dying like that would come with a penalty on a completely different level than ordinary death.”
I nodded slowly, my heart heavy.
“Aurelia.”
“Yeah.”
“Do you remember the rules of this stage? The ones that showed up in the status window?”
I remembered it. The sole rule of this stage: 【All creatures must remain faithful to their desires.】
“Every stage concludes once its narrative reaches a satisfying ending. Whether the Ancient Gods are satisfied or not, it follows the most plausible and intense trajectory.”
I turned Bilateia’s words over in my mind several times, trying to grasp their meaning.
“A satisfying narrative, then.”
I stared into the darkness for a moment before speaking.
“So the ending doesn’t have to align with the gods’ intentions? The plausibility and intensity—those are judged by this world itself.”
“Exactly. That’s why you can wreak havoc across this world and that one.”
Pleased with my understanding, she snapped her fingers and pointed directly at me.
“I believe your curse will become your greatest weapon.”
“Silpi’s curse, you mean?”
“Yes. Later, when this stage ends and you try to hold the Ancient Gods accountable, you can use the excuse that ‘the curse caused the board to flip against my intentions.'”
“…Will that work?”
“The Ancient Gods treat rules as absolute standards, and curses are already approved rules. Using the curse as an excuse gives you justification.”
I let out a short exclamation of admiration while regarding Bilateia.
The more I considered it, the more intricate the scheme became. Using my curse as a shield and exploiting the rule to follow desire—the temptation to determine the narrative’s conclusion myself was immensely appealing.
‘On a stage manipulated by the Ancient Gods, I reverse the established rules and bring down the curtain myself… That does sound entertaining.’
“You understand. I’ll leave first, so count to ten before you come out.”
Bilateia returned to her usual cunning expression and rose from her seat. As I watched her stand, I finally voiced the question I’d been holding back.
“Wait, can I ask you one thing?”
“Make it brief.”
“Why are you helping me? The way you won’t explain suggests the Ancient Gods offered you and Leonas quite favorable terms.”
Bilateia’s movements froze completely. I stared at her rigid form and continued.
“The Ancient Gods are watching, yet you deliberately use poison, wait for me in the Dark Space, and share information. There must be a reason for that.”
Bilateia remained silent for a long time. She gazed endlessly into the empty darkness before finally speaking in a low voice.
“Hyup.”
“What?”
“Hyup means—”
Bilateia continued, her gaze still fixed on the void.
“It’s not loyalty or honor. It’s repaying a debt when you receive one. The repayment doesn’t have to be kind, and it doesn’t have to be what the other person wants. The act of repayment itself—that’s what hyup is to me.”
“…I don’t quite understand.”
“I remember the kindness you showed me and Leonas in the previous world.”
“Ah…”
“I’m not the type to be gracious with words like ‘thank you’ or ‘I’m grateful.’ So I’m just going to… ugh, never mind!”
Bilateia, who had been speaking so well, suddenly flared up in irritation and stomped away into the darkness. I watched her resolute silhouette recede swiftly, then quietly echoed her words.
“Hyup.”
Don’t place value in invisible things like loyalty or honor. They’re sandcastles that crumble with circumstance. I taught the children that very lesson.
‘Yet Bilateia understood what hyup truly meant from those words.’
I wondered if what I had built was not a sandcastle after all. Perhaps what I had constructed with the villagers and with Bilateia was not sand, but solid brick.
“You know, Bilateia.”
The words escaped before I could stop them. Bilateia, who had already walked far beyond sight, halted and turned back to look at me.
“Thank you. Hearing you say that has lifted such a weight from my heart.”
Bilateia Fernichiosa Venisike simply stared at me in silence for a moment, her gaze unwavering.
“Since you’re thanking me, I suppose I owe you a bonus.”
“I wouldn’t say no.”
“That curse of yours—the way results manifest opposite to your intent. Practice refining it, learning to wield it with greater precision. It’s far more useful than you realize.”
“Hmm… So I should hide my true desires from the Ancient Gods?”
“No. Quite the opposite. Make absolutely certain they see it.”
I blinked.
“The Ancient Gods are fixated on one target alone—the Professor. You’re merely a tool to torment them, while Leonas Hagpethar Yuletanis and I are merely tools to stop them. That’s all we are to them.”
“I see.”
“Both of us live with such earnestness, yet we’re treated as disposable. Doesn’t that grate on you?”
“Perhaps.”
“Then stop living like diluted water. This time, draw their attention properly—the way you wreaked havoc in the previous world.”
“I’ll give it a try.”
“And here—there’s a passage behind the wall clock in your chamber. I’ll take this route to the Garden and then to your room, so you go straight through that passage.”
Having emptied her words, she stepped back into the darkness, then paused as though remembering something and added one more thing.
“If I ever need to use poison again, next time I’ll use something that lets you slip away like sleep. I was in such a hurry this time—I used something far too potent.”
“It wasn’t so bad.”
“It was terrible! Pain is pain!”
Bilateia Fernichiosa Venisike shot back sharply, then whirled around and vanished completely into the darkness. I watched that void for a long moment before a soft laugh escaped me.
I was not alone. That was enough.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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