I Became an Ancient All-Host Lifeform - Chapter 28

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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028 Mushroom Paradise

The moment we emerged from the forest and arrived near Debri Village, I found my eyes refusing to believe what they saw.

‘What the—this is insane. What is all this?’

From the village entrance to the open grounds beyond, mushrooms with pale-green caps and white spots carpeted the earth in every direction.
It was, literally and truly, a Mushroom Paradise.
My Revival Mushrooms had taken over the entire village.
Then Morgul’s voice emerged from the gemstone embedded in Kyugsik’s forehead, tinged with wonder.

– My, my… Such extraordinary reproductive power.

In that instant, the face of that small child—Jimi, the one I’d saved before—surfaced in my mind.

‘Jimi… what exactly have you done?’

Just then, the sound of approaching footsteps reached us as figures drew toward the village entrance.

‘Someone’s coming! Hide, quick!’

We hurriedly concealed ourselves in the nearby brush.

“Hehehehe!”

A group of snot-nosed children came wandering out of the village, playing and roughhousing.
Each of them held a Revival Mushroom in hand, munching away contentedly.
They moved through the village like kids picking up junk snacks from a corner convenience store.
Then Morgul spoke up.

– Hmm? Something seems off about those children. Is it possible that mushroom is actually harmful to humans?

Now that I thought about it, Morgul was right—their pupils were half-glazed.
Cough, cough… The kids must have skipped sleep last night, that’s all.

‘No, no. The Revival Mushroom is completely harmless to the human body.’

After all, I’d made it with the edible option and even added umami flavor, so the children would naturally enjoy it.
There was absolutely nothing in it that could be harmful to humans….

“Dummy! Dummy! Hehehehe!”
Smack!
“Hmph, you’re the dummy! Hehehehe!”
Smack-smack!

The children laughed like they’d lost their minds, pummeling each other’s heads with their fists.
Ah, right. Now that I thought about it, when I’d made the Revival Mushroom, I’d added the hallucinogenic effects from the Red-Haired Hallucination Mushroom.
Not much—just a tiny amount….

‘Ahem… It’s completely safe for the human body.’

Even at my explanation, Morgul muttered as if utterly bewildered.

– Hmm…. Those children are clearly not in their right minds, no matter how I look at it. Hallucinations, perhaps…?

Well… it’s a magnificent elixir that even heals wounds, so surely a mild hallucination like that can be overlooked as a small quirk?
Besides, the children all seem quite delighted (?) about it anyway.
I cleared my throat and hastily changed the subject.

‘Well, first I need to get a detailed look at the situation inside the village. Let’s infiltrate.’

I issued instructions to Bokgu through the Hive Mind.
I couldn’t bring Bokgu into the village—his massive frame would draw too much attention from the villagers, and that would do us no good.
For slipping in quietly under the radar, our compact little Kyugsik was perfect for the job.

‘Bokgu, you stay here and rest. Keep yourself well hidden so no one spots you. If anything happens, just call. Understood?’
Woof.

Bokgu’s tail wagged as he let out a small, quiet bark.
The beast understood commands perfectly—remarkably well, actually.

‘Come on, Kyugsik. We need to find out exactly what this bastard Jimi has been up to.’
Squeak!

Kyugsik crept carefully toward Debri Village, now transformed into the Mushroom Paradise.

* * *

At that same moment.
The Seonghwang Church investigation unit had arrived at Debri Village.
The moment they set foot in the village, they encountered a sight utterly different from what they’d imagined.
The Female Priestess’s mouth fell open involuntarily as they reached the village entrance.

“My goodness. Is this the Mushroom Paradise?”

Debri Village was indeed exactly as she’d said—a kingdom of mysterious green mushrooms.
From the fence at the village entrance to the open square, and even across the roofs of the houses, countless mushrooms with green caps and white spots bloomed in profusion everywhere.
Moreover, a large cauldron sat bubbling in the center of the village square, releasing a sweetly pungent, earthy aroma that assailed the nose with surprising intensity.
The moment the Seonghwang Church investigators entered the gate, several elderly women who spotted them came rushing over.
They welcomed the investigators warmly.

“Oh my, are you not priests! What brings you to our humble village!”
“You must have had such a long journey. We just picked these mushrooms fresh and made soup—please, have a bowl before you go!”

Their complexions were remarkably ruddy and healthy for rural folk, and every one of them wore a spotless, innocent smile.
Disarmed by their wholesome country hospitality, the Female Priestess felt her wariness—which had been heightened by rumors of a vampire demon—melt away.

“Thank you. You’re all so kind.”
“Hehe, our dear priestess—your words are as beautiful as your face! Come this way.”
“Oh? Ha ha… thank you.”

The Female Priestess flushed at the flood of compliments.

‘Hmm…’

Though the rest of the investigation unit relaxed their guard at the villagers’ unexpected hospitality, the Exorcist Priest grew more wary.
His sharp eyes swept carefully across their surroundings.

‘Their pupils are half-dilated. And despite us being fully armed strangers, they show not a shred of caution. Something about this doesn’t add up…’

Even for priests of the Seonghwang Church, ordinary people’s first instinct upon seeing armed outsiders is to be on guard.
Yet these villagers showed no such wariness—only pure, unbridled welcome.
The Exorcist Priest leaned close to his companions and whispered so only they could hear.

“This village feels off somehow. Everyone, stay alert.”
“What? But it seems so peaceful…”

Just as the Female Priestess tilted her head in confusion, an elderly man who appeared to be the Village Elder approached.
He wore a warm smile and clasped his hands together respectfully.

“Oh my, priests! Welcome, welcome. I am the Village Elder of this settlement. Since you’ve graced our village with your presence, let us first introduce you to the Forest Child. Surely priests of your caliber are more than worthy of meeting her.”

The Holy Knight tilted his head at the elder’s unexpected proposal.

“The Forest Child? Who is that?”

The old man’s face swelled with pride as he spread both hands wide for emphasis.

“A most special child, blessed abundantly by the Forest’s grace! Since priests such as yourselves have walked this distant road, you must certainly receive the Forest’s blessing as well.”
“Excuse me?”

In that instant, the investigation team’s eyes grew sharp and cold, as though ice water had been dashed across their faces.
The Forest’s blessing—spoken before priests of the Central Church.
In their doctrine, only the Goddess of Light, Lumina herself, held divine status.
All other deities were denied, and to invoke their blessings was a clear and unambiguous heresy—a violation of sacred law.

The Holy Knights and the Exorcist Priest exchanged sharp, cutting glances.
Yet the elder’s expression showed no malice, no madness whatsoever.
He was simply an honest old villager who wished to share something precious with his guests.
The Female Priestess, fearing this might spiral into a heresy matter, forced a smile and spoke carefully.

“Ha, ha-ha… Village Elder. In this world, there is only the Goddess of Light, Lumina. To worship any other deity is a grave error, I’m afraid. I think you simply misspoke just now. Yes?”

The Village Elder laughed and replied.

“Is that so? Yet only recently, the Goddess of the Forest revived the dying Forest Child and bestowed her blessing upon her.”

The Female Priestess gasped at his words.

“Oh! Village Elder… you mustn’t speak like that…”

Now that the words “Goddess of the Forest” had been spoken, this matter could never be smoothed over so easily.
And indeed, the moment the Exorcist Priest heard the elder mention the Forest Goddess, his expression froze over with cold calculation.

“That’s enough, priestess.”

The Exorcist Priest stepped forward, cutting off the Female Priestess who had been trying to contain the damage.
He approached the Village Elder with feigned ignorance and inquired smoothly.

“I see. And where is the Forest Child now?”

At his question, the Village Elder and the townspeople beamed with delight and took the lead.

“Ah! So the priests wish to receive the Forest’s blessing as well! Wonderful. This way, this way. Please follow us!”

The villagers, genuinely overjoyed, began to guide the investigation team forward.
The team followed, their nerves stretched taut with suspicion about the heretical practices before them.
Walking behind the procession, the Female Priestess worried in silence.

‘What do I do… This has become terrible…’

The Holy Knights of the Seonghwang Church showed no mercy toward those who contradicted their doctrine.
She had witnessed them wield their iron maces with brutal indifference—not once or twice, but countless times—over matters ordinary folk might easily dismiss as nothing.
The thought that such slaughter might unfold before her eyes again made tears well up inside her even now.
Unaware of her dread, the villagers led the investigation team forward with bright, innocent expressions toward Jimi’s home.

* * *

Squeak?

At the edge of Debri Village, Kyugsik came to an abrupt halt as he prepared to slip quietly into town.
A crowd of people had gathered near the village entrance.
Among them, four figures in white priestly robes stood out distinctly.
Two wore armor, while the other pair carried staffs in their hands.
Morgul, catching sight of them, opened his mouth.

– Hmm. I sense strong Holy Power radiating from them. They’re clergy—two Holy Knights and two priests.
‘Ah, yes, I can tell that much myself.’
– Hmph.

Wow! So those people really are priests.
Since this is a fantasy world, they must heal people with Holy Power and all that, right?
And one of the priests seems to be female—her face practically glows even from this distance. Man, if a woman like that stopped you on the street and asked if you believed, you’d have to follow her…!
But the Holy Knights don’t match what I imagined at all.
Sure, they’re built and wearing steel armor exactly as I’d pictured it, but….

‘What is that… thing?’

My eyes fixed on the absurdly massive iron clubs slung across the Holy Knights’ backs.
In most fantasy stories, a ‘mace’ has vicious spikes jutting out all over its head, doesn’t it?
But the weapons these men carried were utterly smooth—not a single spike in sight.
No matter how I looked at it, calling that thing a ‘mace’ felt wrong; ‘iron club’ seemed far more accurate.
Curiosity piqued, I immediately turned to Morgul.

‘Elder, what’s the story with those iron clubs they’re carrying? They call themselves Holy Knights, yet here they are toting around weapons that look more suited to street thugs. What’s the deal?’

Morgul let out a low whistle.

– Huh. Could those be Lumina Church?
‘I wouldn’t know. But what is the Lumina Church, anyway?’

At my question, Morgul grumbled in response.

– Hmph, fanatics who worship the Goddess of Light, Lumina. Their Holy Knights have wielded those crude blunt maces since ancient times.

Goddess of Light? Lumina? What even is that?
Still, if Morgul knew about them, the Lumina Church must have been famous for three thousand years.
But why do they carry weapons like that?

‘A blunt mace? If they’re going to use a mace anyway, wouldn’t you at least put sharp spikes on the head? Why insist on something so bland?’

Even if they were Holy Knights, the weapon design seemed frustratingly dull. More than that, it looked like such weapons would pack far less of a punch.
But Morgul’s next explanation shattered my ‘common sense’ entirely.

– That’s because, according to their scripture, the Goddess of Light, Lumina, forbade her followers from killing. So those who live by Lumina’s Religious Law are strictly prohibited from wielding sharp-edged weapons.

Ah—so there was a rule forbidding murder.
But wait, doesn’t that seem contradictory?
As my head tilted in confusion, Morgul continued.

– So their Holy Knights trot around with those crude iron clubs, smashing the skulls of heretics as they please.
‘…What? Smashing skulls?’

I was certain I’d misheard him.
Wait, didn’t he just say the goddess forbade killing? How does bashing someone’s head in not count?
The absurdity of it pulled out a hollow laugh.

‘That doesn’t make sense! If you swing a crude iron club like that at someone’s head, they’ll obviously die! You just said she forbade killing!’

An unbelievable answer came back.

– Well, their brazen logic is that they never “intended” it in the first place.
‘…What?’
– So what they’re saying is, they were only trying to “reform” that poor soul with the iron mace. If the person died in the process, that’s merely an “unforeseen accident” that occurred during the reformation. That’s their argument.
‘No, how is that an unforeseen accident?’
– Hmph, anyway, since they never intended murder from the start, it doesn’t violate religious law. I’ve never heard sophistry this absurd!

Jesus. I’ve seen a lot in my life, but I’ve never heard such brilliant nonsense before.
They had no intention of beating someone to death, but if they keep swinging, someone might die? Then that’s murder—what do you call it, “reforming into frozen death”?
Sigh… The legal concept of “indirect intent” really is that important, isn’t it, everyone.
I mean, a hunk of metal that size is obviously a weapon with or without spikes, isn’t it?
While I reeled in shock, I heard Morgul’s sigh.

– Sigh… Three thousand years have passed, and yet I find myself witnessing such madness again….

Good heavens… They were doing this three thousand years ago too….
I suppose it’s possible in the distant past.
But if they’re still at it after three thousand years, something has gone very wrong, hasn’t it?
Humanity in this world is making progress….
Isn’t it? Tell me it is.

At that moment, the villagers were walking ahead with joyful expressions, leading the clergy somewhere.
But the faces of the two men carrying the iron maces looked wrong.
Their eyes had that look—like they were about to use their iron maces to “reform” the backs of the villagers leading the way.
I immediately instructed Kyugsik.

‘Let’s follow those people quickly. The look in those iron mace fellows’ eyes tells me something bad is about to happen.’
Squeak!

With the quick, nimble movements of a rat, Kyugsik began tailing them, slipping between the brush and the shadows of buildings.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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