Grab the Regressor by the Collar and Debut - Chapter 456
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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456. BUILD UP (2)
Memory deletion.
I knew exactly what that meant.
[System Alert: The timeline and memories of the relevant timeline (Jeong Si-u) will be adjusted.]
[System Alert: Memories of past timelines will be deleted.]
[System Alert: Loading….]
Back in March, at that Namhae Villa.
It was something I had done to Jeong Si-u.
“Why is this… happening to me?”
And when, exactly?
What was even more shocking was that this wasn’t the first time.
I immediately activated the search function and typed in the word “memory,” only to discover that my Mental Care System history contained far more memory-related records than just the one I’d found.
Seized by an inexplicable sense of unease, I quickly activated the System’s inquiry function.
“Inquiry.”
[User inquiry request detected. Please state your inquiry.]
“What is this?”
[Inquiry regarding ‘memory deletion’ has been received.]
[….]
[Memory deletion is the act of arbitrarily erasing a user’s memories….]
“That’s not what I’m asking. I want to know who did it, why, when, where, how, and which memories were deleted.”
The System’s mechanical responses had never felt more frustrating.
With a hint of irritation, I pressed the System further, and it responded by spinning endlessly in that infuriating loading loop.
After a few seconds, the System finally produced another response.
[Memory deletion is the act of arbitrarily erasing a user’s memories. When a user’s memories threaten their stability, the Time Management Authority may exercise its authority to implement this measure.]
“So why was this applied to me without my knowledge?”
[Memory deletion is the act of arbitrarily erasing a user’s memories. When a user’s memories….]
“This is driving me insane.”
[Memory deletion is the act of arbitrarily erasing a user’s memories. When a user’s memories….]
[Memory deletion is the act of arbitrarily erasing a user’s memories. When a user’s memories….]
[Memory deletion is the act of arbitrarily erasing a user’s memories. When a user’s memories….]
This inflexible System—not even a cheap chatbot—simply repeated the same answer endlessly.
If this were even remotely similar to Thirteen, I might suspect some hidden intention behind these responses meant to protect me. But expecting that from this System was like hoping my laptop would develop a soul.
The System was just a system, nothing more.
Perhaps this time it truly was nothing but zeros and ones—responding only to commands and inputs, devoid of heart or intention.
“…Flexibility?”
Ironically, it was in that very moment that I found a clue to this inexplicable memory deletion.
I opened the search list again and reviewed all the memory-related records.
“…Memory suppression, February last year.”
The earliest record was a memory suppression that occurred in February last year.
It had been triggered as a means to deactivate the ‘Wandering and Drifting’ mode, which was now inactive.
And looking back, there was only one incident that could have caused me to wander and drift during that time when I was too busy rushing after clues about regression.
“…The end-of-month evaluation.”
Since the first filming date for Miro Maze was March 1st, if something happened before that, it would definitely have been because of the end-of-month evaluation.
-I just… didn’t want to do it, apparently.
-I needed to do it to have even one more chance of ranking high in the end-of-month evaluation. I just didn’t want to do it, apparently.
“Ah, back then….”
Only then did I remember wandering around the Playground at dawn after having a nightmare the day after the end-of-month evaluation ended and I returned home.
The way my rapidly sinking heart had become lighter, as if calmed by the cold wind at some point.
“So that wasn’t just my imagination, but actually….”
My past memories were actually being suppressed?
I recalled my first life, which had grown hazy at some point.
I’d thought I was naturally forgetting it because so much time had passed, the wandering and drifting mode had been deactivated, and my personality was gradually adapting to this current Timeline—but apparently that wasn’t the case.
“…But why is one memory suppression and the other memory deletion when they’re the same type of suppression?”
I checked all the detailed items in the records to grasp more precise information.
The memory suppression that first occurred in February last year happened several more times after that.
The detailed contents began to change starting from October last year, which I’d just discovered.
[XX.XX.XX 07:20:02 PM – Memory Suppression (Memory Suppression) (Reason: Reducing psychological shock for fixed Returners)]
[XX.XX.XX 02:05:51 AM – Memory Suppression (Memory Suppression) (Reason: Preventing unconscious collapse from nightmares)]
[XX.04.XX 01:30:34 AM – Memory Suppression (Memory Suppression) (Reason: Preventing unconscious collapse from nightmares)]
[XX.10.XX 10:17:49 AM – Memory Suppression (Memory Deletion) (Reason: Trauma trigger risk detected for fixed Returner)]
‘Memory Suppression’ was last performed in April of last year.
After that, nothing happened for a full six months, then suddenly in October it upgraded to the terrifying stage of ‘Memory Deletion’.
“Damn it.”
It was in an instant that I, standing with my arms crossed while staring at the System’s records for a long time, pieced everything together.
“That damned nightmare.”
Nightmares.
For me, there was only one nightmare.
Those tedious memories from the past.
-You’re not understanding again, again. It’s so frustrating.
-Ha-jin. You should be able to do this much.
-…I can’t do any more.
So what this means is that right now, this ‘Mental Care System’ is worried about me having a mental breakdown because of what happened in my past Timeline, and it’s been touching my memories each time?
I couldn’t remember when that tedious nightmare started, but I knew exactly when it stopped.
-I’m okay.
From the day I met Ji Su-ho and returned home, the day I accepted myself as a colleague.
Since that was before the first episode of Miro Maze, I didn’t know the exact date, but I was certain it was around April. And that coincided exactly with when my ‘Memory Suppression’ stopped.
“Then it suddenly appeared in October, and it was even doing ‘Memory Deletion’ at that.”
If it had been Kim Thirteen, he would never have done such a thing.
That guy told me that even those times when I failed miserably and collapsed were the times that created who I am now.
Then the culprit was….
“…I suppose that’s why something felt off.”
This FM System friend must have arrived around that exact time.
In its excessive attempt to protect my mental state, the Mental Care System had progressed from mere memory suppression to the extreme counteraction of memory deletion.
‘I had no idea about that until now.’
I was angry, but I couldn’t afford to be angry.
There was no point in venting at someone who wouldn’t listen, and besides, this time I understood exactly what that entity’s ‘intention’ was.
“Is my mental state really that fragile?”
The fact that the memory deletion applied to me, just as it had to Jeong Si-u, meant this razor-sharp system had judged that unknown memory posed a threat equivalent to his—dangerous enough to warrant erasure.
Rather than blame a blue window incapable of proper responses for following its manual, it made far more sense to focus on how this situation currently affected me and how I should handle it going forward.
“Inquiry.”
[User inquiry request detected. Please state your inquiry.]
“Is the deleted memory irretrievable? In other words…. I’m curious whether it’s a permanent deletion. Explain the difference between deletion and suppression as specifically and simply as possible.”
[Inquiry received.]
[….]
[Memory deletion by the Mental Care System refers to the temporary erasure of memories containing risk factors for the user’s mental health stability.]
[This is a temporary state that may be recovered or permanently erased depending on the Mental Care System’s security level. It requires a classification one tier higher than memory suppression, which builds walls around memories to create indirect perception.]
That was enough confirmation for me.
I didn’t hesitate to speak.
“Lower my Mental Care System security level. Set it to a stage where the system won’t tamper with my memories carelessly.”
[Warning! Warning! Unsafe setting change attempt detected.]
[Do you wish to change your Mental Care System security level? (Y/N)]
[※Changing this may result in slower response times for your safety in certain situations.※]
“….”
The system window flashed a bright red alert icon as it issued its threat.
If this were Thirteen, who knew full well that I despised red system windows because of the Returner, they would never display such an alarm carelessly.
“…I know I could be in danger.”
The Mental Care System had saved me countless times across numerous situations.
Without it, I would have thought myself mad when I first experienced regression, and I might have drowned countless times in the despair and self-loathing that bound me then.
I had been so broken back then that even a mere 10% reduction in this Mental Care System would have shattered me into tears.
“But if I’m the kind of person who collapses over mere forgotten memories from the past, then I should collapse.”
To repair the barn, you must first tear it down.
Otherwise, you cannot build new pillars.
The Returner, the greatest villain in this world, had already been captured, and Dan Ha-ru had chosen to fade away. It meant there wasn’t much time left before this incredible #fantasy hashtag disappeared from my life.
Rather than shoulder all the aftermath when that time comes, it would be better to accept things one by one while I still have access to these superhuman abilities.
“And….”
I trailed off for a moment.
Whether it was the effect of the memory deletion or something else, I barely managed to recall the bonds and memories from past timelines that were now fading beyond my recollection.
The thought that perhaps I had already forgotten or failed to recognize them because of this memory deletion….
“…I don’t want to lose only the memories I wish to forget.”
…All I desperately wanted was to disable this function as soon as possible.
[Warning! Warning! An unsafe settings modification attempt has been detected.]
[Would you like to change the security level of your Mental Care System? (Y/N)]
[※If changed, protective measures for your safety may respond more slowly in certain situations.※]
The same warning window appeared as before.
[Would you like to change the security level of your Mental Care System? (Y/N)]
It was a choice I hadn’t seen in quite some time.
Though this wasn’t really the moment to be reminiscing, I couldn’t help but let out a laugh.
Brushing away the countless red warning icons that kept flashing, I raised my hand and clicked on the System window.
“Life was never meant to play it safe anyway.”
And my choice this time was the same as it had always been.
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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