Grab the Regressor by the Collar and Debut - Chapter 252

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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252. TOUCH HIGH! (4)
A rookie comes out to promote their new song but doesn’t perform it?
Everyone, including Sanchez, was bewildered by the absurd concept. Even the production team looked stunned as they searched for the Kairos manager, but Ji Su-ho was already wearing an expression of resignation, as if this was beyond his control.
It was only natural.
‘I really had to twist Ji Su-ho’s arm to convince him about this.’
Though “twisting his arm” amounted to nothing more than a sales pitch of “just trust me on this,” as long as the title “Miro’s Zhuge Liang” remained effective for me, it was surprisingly persuasive.
‘If we just play our song here and dance around for a bit, people will find it boring and skip past it anyway.’
The biggest change OTT brought was that people could now choose to watch only the parts they wanted to see.
Rather than play a measly thirty seconds of music only to get skipped en masse, I intended to turn this opening itself into content.
Sanchez asked us back with a bewildered expression.
“Wait, Do-ha. What do you mean? You’re not going to let us hear the song?”
“Based on the filming date, our new song release articles and teasers haven’t been announced yet, so we’ve concluded that we cannot perform our new song at this venue.”
Lee Do-ha, already convinced once by my logic, was already raising his guard without me having to do anything.
However, there were often cases where songs couldn’t be released due to scheduling issues, and it wasn’t exclusive to us. As a seasoned broadcaster, Sanchez quickly changed the subject.
“Alright, alright. So if the new song is off the table, how about you perform a song from your debut instead?”
“Yeah, that works. Let’s see the debut song, the debut song.”
“Ha-jin, so the debut song is acceptable?”
To the question I’d been waiting for, I puffed out my chest with the most merchant-like expression I could muster.
“You want our debut song?”
“Huh? No, well….”
“You want to see it?”
“Yes, yes….”
Toward the entertainers who nodded their heads as if entranced despite their reluctance, I shook my head firmly.
“I won’t show it to you.”
“Why not?”
“We’d like our seniors to keep being curious about us.”
“What?”
“We want you to be so curious you’re going crazy. We want you to search for our performance when you go home after filming.”
“This guy’s shamelessness is no joke….”
“All three of them look kind of scary right now.”
With the brazen attitude that had once even flustered Seo Tae-il, I shrugged and thought to myself.
‘Hmm. If word gets out that I came on public broadcast and didn’t perform a single new song, Tae-hyun’s going to kill me, isn’t he?’
Since our Tae-hyun needs to focus on entrance exam prep, I absolutely have to keep the contents of this shoot confidential until it airs….
* * *
The first mission theme was 【Physical Competition】.
It seemed like a concept designed to gather a bunch of young guys who could exert some effort and have them actually use their bodies.
During a brief break, I caught a glimpse of a few Winter Tail members hurriedly doing push-ups to pump up their muscles.
“So, Ha-jin, do you work out?”
Today’s father-in-law, who naturally became my teammate, spoke. I naturally stepped aside and pointed to Lee Do-ha, who had finally put on a team uniform that fit his size perfectly.
“This guy’s good at it.”
“Ah, you can’t do it yourself?”
“…I’m somewhat picky about sports.”
Recalling the memories of footvolley, where I’d been cursed for playing with my feet(?), my mouth suddenly turned bitter.
In the meantime, all the other cast members finished changing and gathered at the Filming Studio. Dan Ha-ru, who had returned last among us, also stood beside me, checking his outfit.
“…?”
But why did this sparkly bastard look a bit gloomy?
Seeing his somewhat complicated expression, I wondered if something had happened again, so I poked his side and whispered a question.
“What’s with your face? Did something happen?”
“Huh? No? Nothing happened at all?”
At my question, Dan Ha-ru quickly returned to his usual expression and made a face as if he didn’t understand.
Since that appearance was also his usual self, I could only nod my head while feeling an uneasy sense of unease.
And so, the official recording began.
The Main PD, seated in front of numerous cameras, continued the proceedings.
“Today’s theme for ‘Touch High’ is ‘The Ultimate Male Idol Three-Way Battle—Become the Best!’ The first theme to determine the best is a sports competition. The team that earns the most points in this mission will acquire victory badges in a tiered system.”
This much was a familiar rule.
“However, each team also has a ‘saboteur’ whose role is to prevent their team’s victory. The fewer points a saboteur’s team earns, the more individual badges they can acquire, and this will also affect the final results.”
At the mention of a spy, people began to murmur.
I instinctively looked down at the head of the sparkly one beside me, whose arm was draped over my shoulder.
‘Could this bastard be…?’
That strange expression from earlier aside, since he had a track record as a spy, I needed to keep an eye on him.
‘Anyway, it’s not me, and given the nature of this rule, they probably assigned most of the major roles to the guests….’
Lee Do-ha gave off the impression of someone who couldn’t lie, so if I were the production team, I would have chosen Dan Ha-ru for the sake of unexpectedness—that was my conclusion.
“After each mission ends, team members will vote on who they think their team’s saboteur is. Whoever is pointed out the most will have their victory badge taken away, regardless of their actual identity, so be careful.”
While I was pondering how to exploit Dan Ha-ru if he turned out to be the spy, the identity of the first game was revealed.
“The first game under the sports theme is a 100-second relay. Kairos team, please come forward.”
The Set, which had been covered by lighting and cloth, was revealed. Various tools were roughly divided into about six sections. It seemed like one per person and one group mission.
‘There’s nothing particularly funny to talk about…. Should I just drag out the time with physical comedy?’
While secretly assessing my entertainment value and examining the mission events, the comedian playing the role of ‘father-in-law’ who had taken on the role of team leader for our team began devising a strategy.
“Alright, I’ll do that elephant trunk spin first. Do-ha, you said you’re good at sports, so let’s do that—hitting the balloon with a soccer ball.”
“Then I’ll do this knife-throwing thing! I’m lucky!”
“Good, good. And you, noona, do this sticky note peeling…. Then what’s left is….”
“Ah, I can do anything that’s left.”
“Yeah? Then Ha-jin can do this one.”
With a relieved expression, the comedian handed me something.
The moment I confirmed the identity of that object, the expressions of Lee Do-ha, Dan Ha-ru, and myself all hardened simultaneously.
“You just need to do ten footvolley kicks, so this might actually be the easiest. Let’s go all in?”
…Kick what?
“Alright! Kairos team! Take your positions!”
“Ah, wait…!”
“Come on, let’s go! Fighting, fighting! Whoever can’t do this here is the saboteur. Got it? I’m filming right away.”
“No, Ha-jin hyung is…!”
Dan Ha-ru stared at me with an urgent expression before being dragged back to his seat.
“Ha-jin hyung is in development…!”
Along with Dan Ha-ru’s cry that I couldn’t quite hear, the whistle signaling the start of the game rang out.
* * *
I paused for a moment to think.
‘Sure, I’m terrible at ball sports that require footwork, but isn’t jegichagi a different category altogether?’
It’s not like a ball bouncing around everywhere. You just kick that thing floating in the air a few times, right? I can’t manage ten kicks? With my athletic ability?
“Ha-jin nooooo!”
…Yeah. I was wrong.
Some things just can’t be done, no matter what.
“He’s kicking the jegichagi in a really strange way….”
“It looks like his foot just won’t go up?”
“Hey, hey. Sung-ho. Just switch the order. I don’t think Ha-jin can do jegichagi.”
“Wait, isn’t he a Destroyer? There’s no way this could happen unless he’s a Destroyer.”
“Ha-jin. Be honest with me. You’re a Destroyer, aren’t you?”
I avoided the Team Leader’s gaze as he grabbed my collar and asked in a desperate voice.
“I’m really not a Destroyer, I promise. I really am not. It’s just… sometimes there are things that human effort alone can’t overcome, and that’s really frustrating….”
Only after I tore my leg trying to kick the jegichagi once did I finally accept my defeat.
This wasn’t going to work. Some things just couldn’t be done.
“Let’s change the event. This isn’t working out with Ha-jin.”
“But if Ha-jin is a Destroyer, changing the event doesn’t really make a difference.”
“Ha-jin hyung has always been… not very good at things involving footwork….”
“Oh, he’s always been bad at it? Even in your group?”
“Yes….”
An emergency meeting broke out among my teammates, excluding me.
Like a scapegoat, I stood apart from them and tried again with the poor jegichagi, but when it hit my heel wrong and landed on the camera director’s hat, even that was confiscated.
“Alright then, Ha-jin does this instead. The knife-throwing one.”
“Yeah, yeah. He can’t manipulate this one.”
“And Ha-ru, you try the jegichagi. You can do jegichagi, right?”
“Yes! I’ll give it my best!”
After the meeting concluded, my mission and Dan Ha-ru’s mission were swapped.
Since Dan Ha-ru’s mission of simply inserting five knives safely into the pirate barrel was essentially a matter of luck, I humbly accepted my fate.
“Guys, let’s give it a shot. Do-ha hasn’t even tried kicking the ball yet.”
“Yes. I’ll really prove my innocence.”
“Fighting, fighting!!”
As we cheered each other on, the whistle signaling the start of the mission sounded again.
The fixed panelists in the first and second positions skillfully completed their missions, and soon it was my turn.
I held the red toy knife and stabbed it into one of the empty holes at random. The odds were nearly one in fifty, so there was no way this would—
Thunk—!
…it wasn’t there?
“What? What’s happening right now? Did I catch it?”
“Ha-ru stabbed it over twenty-five times and nothing popped out, but now I caught it?”
I stared blankly at my surroundings, still gripping the torso of the pirate man that had burst from the container.
Dan Ha-ru and Lee Do-ha were looking at me with expressions bordering on shock.
“Hyung…. Were you really the saboteur?”
No…. That’s not it?
While I stood dazed by this sudden turn of events in the variety show, the Team Leader restarted the mission from the beginning.
“Hurry, hurry. Let’s try again, again.”
The first and second sequences I’d repeated countless times flew by in the blink of an eye once more.
This time I gripped the yellow sword firmly in my hand and exhaled a measured breath.
‘There’s no way something this insane happens twice in a row on the first try….’
The moment I thought that.
Thwack—!
“…?”
“What? What in the world is happening right now…?”
Thud.
I blinked, staring at the pirate man who had fallen uselessly to the ground.
‘What is going on…?’
Something strange was unfolding…!

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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