Genius Archer’s Streaming - Chapter 301

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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The Genius Archer’s Streaming Season 2 Episode 21
7. His Own Play (2)
“Wow, how many of these are there…?”
While the school gate collapsed on the playground and chaos erupted everywhere, I was in the infirmary counting Choco Pies to prepare for what lay ahead.
“Three, four… seven…”
Compared to what was happening outside, the scene was remarkably peaceful.
After finishing his count of Choco Pies, Balloon Gum shared his thoughts.
“This infirmary is pretty nice, isn’t it?”
The survival expert Balloon Gum seemed quite pleased with the infirmary.
“I mean, couldn’t we just stay here indefinitely? As long as we figure out how to handle… waste…”
He glanced subtly toward the sink in the infirmary.
-Why are you looking at the sink lol
-Don’t give up on being human!
-Ah no, not that lolol
“Ahem. I was just looking, just looking. Anyway, never mind.”
Balloon Gum brushed himself off and stood up, glancing at his phone. He’d been quite thorough about charging it.
That’s when it happened.
Ding.
“Ah. Finally, the emergency alert came through.”
An emergency text notification arrived announcing the disaster situation. It was essentially the system’s way of signaling the start of this game.
[Emergency Disaster Alert] The spread of zombie virus infections is accelerating. All citizens must read the response guidelines…]
“…Wait? What do you mean wait? What’s with this waiting?”
Saying that, Balloon Gum wandered toward the door before lying back down on the bed.
-You’re pretty good at waiting though lol
-Master of waiting
-This guy isn’t waiting, he’s staying put
“Look, I’ve played quite a lot of zombie games, you know? I’ve watched plenty of movies too. If you act up at the beginning, you’re basically extra material.”
-That’s true lol
-So the government was right after all “wait”
-In the end, waiting lol
“For now, I’ll just hold out with Choco Pies and cola.”
Balloon Gum unwrapped a Choco Pie and ate it to stave off hunger, then drank cola to get some sugar and lift his mood.
That’s when it happened.
Thump. Thump.
“School Nurse! The PE Teacher! The PE Teacher!!”
It was the Vice President. Having seen the Physical Education Teacher collapse on the playground, he’d rushed over and finally arrived at the infirmary.
“The PE Teacher collapsed! Aren’t you here? Where did you go…?”
“…”
Balloon Gum quietly consumed his Choco Pie and waited until she left.
-Lol staying quiet as a mouse
-This is brutal…
-Hahahaha, now this is a game
“Ahem. Everyone. Surviving alone right now is already difficult enough, you know?”
-True
-That’s fair
Vice squad leader ㅠㅠㅠ
The Vice President, now a zombie, headed to another floor to search for the School Nurse, who was likely shambling about somewhere.
Had ten minutes passed since then?
The cries of zombies began echoing through the annex corridor.
“Graaahhh…”
“Graah!”
Balloon Gum pressed his ear against the door.
Thud thud thud.
Footsteps sounded unnervingly real.
“It seems quite a few zombies have made their way in.”
That’s when it happened.
Grrrrrrowl.
Thunder rumbles from his stomach.
It’s not from hunger.
[Current urination level: 95%]
[Must be addressed!]
[Current defecation level: 87%]
[Preparation for resolution required!]
-Here it comes hahahaha
-Zombie School: Pay penance for all the shit you’ve taken in Ril.
-War with excrement
“Ugh… this game is vicious. You deliberately set this up this way, didn’t you?”
The timing of the zombies increasing coincides with when those who ate are about to relieve themselves. It seems Almond’s scene earlier was no coincidence.
-At least you have a golf club
-You’re used to taking a dump in games anyway. Just go on the floor
-With a golf club, even you can manage it
Emboldened by the chat’s encouragement(?), Balloon Gum carefully opens the door and ventures out.
Creeeak…
Ding.
That’s when a mission appears.
[Do a forward roll while defecating in your pants for 500,000 won]
“No. Excuse me. What do you take me for? I’m… I’m actually taking this game seriously right now, you know?”
-This madman hahahaha
-A forward roll haha
-Oh man haha
-I’m eating, damn it lol
Balloon Gum rejected the mission without accepting it.
“Mission declined. I’m leaving.”
Gripping the golf club firmly with both hands, he cautiously stepped into the hallway.
The zombies reacted immediately.
“Grrrraaahhh!”
A zombie shrieked and trudged toward him.
“Oh, here it comes. Here it comes…! I’ll just dodge this one for now!”
The zombie was slower than expected.
Tap-tap-tap!
Slipping through the gap quickly, I could easily evade it. Like dribbling past defenders in soccer without even needing to kick the ball. In short, breaking through was incredibly easy.
However, that was only when facing one.
“Graaahhh!”
“Grrruuhhh!”
Two zombies… no, three blocked the way.
I had to clear them out and move forward.
“Tch…”
I considered just turning back.
Of course, the zombie I’d just passed was following me.
[Defecation level at 95%!]
[Urination level at 100%!]
There was no more time to retreat.
Like when my controller used to vibrate during old console games, my body trembled.
“Ugh, ugh, ugh… I, I have to break through. Damn…”
Balloon Gum cursed the game and charged forward.
“Ahhhhh!”
The zombies responded and approached.
“Graaahhh!”
The nearest zombie opened its jaws wide at him.
Balloon Gum gripped the golf club and shouted.
“Hole in one!”
They say ignorance breeds courage. The golf club swung with surprising confidence, tracing a clean arc. A strike aimed at the head was unleashed.
—Whoosh!
However, the attack missed.
Not only did it fail to hit the head, it didn’t even graze the shoulder—a complete whiff.
Far from a hole in one, the ball had flown completely off the course.
But there was no reason to be disappointed.
Because something else had become a hole in one.
“…!?”
It was Balloon Gum’s own head!
-????
-?
-Huh?
-…?
Thwack!
With that sound, Balloon Gum’s head lodged itself firmly inside the zombie’s mouth.
The precision was so perfect that it would be more accurate to say it was embedded rather than merely inserted.
Unable to overcome the weight distribution as the golf club swung wide, his feet slipped, and Balloon Gum’s head lurched forward. In short, he just fell.
As a result, his head went directly into the zombie’s mouth.
“Gaaack?!”
The zombie let out a confused sound and looked around, unsure how to digest this.
Its jaw had already become slack and tattered, stretched as wide as Balloon Gum’s head.
Now that the viewers finally understood what was happening, they burst into laughter.
I saw that hole-in-one, nice shot! hahahaha
Hahahahahaha
Hahahahahahaha
I can’t translate this as it appears to be random Korean characters/gibberish rather than actual Korean words.
No friends lolololololol
The zombies look so pitiful it’s funny lol
Crunch! Crunch crunch!
Regardless, the zombie eagerly chewed on Balloon Gum with its mangled jaw.
“Ah, ahhh! Aaaaahhh! Stop! Stop!”
Balloon Gum kept pushing the zombie back with his head, tumbling forward and rolling.
And then….
[Bowel pressure exceeds 110%!]
[Cannot hold it!]
The screen goes black, and an embarrassing sound is heard.
-Huh?
-No way?
-??What
The screen didn’t go dark because he died. A system that blacks out the screen during defecation had activated.
Splorch~!
A thick, wet sound plays, and this message appears.
[Very Disgusting]
Hahahahahahaha
and broadcast genius lol so funny
Lol, that mission from earlier – did you come from the future?
He’s gone crazy lol, seriously gone crazy lolol
Then, this message also appears.
[Survival Failed]
In the end, I was surrounded by zombies and died.
Ding ding ding!
[Mission Man has donated 500,000 won!]
[Just giving it~~]
The mission money I’d rejected earlier came through as a donation. The chat window exploded with messages.
-???: Once you’re famous, people clap even if you take a dump (physical)
Hahahahaha, this is so funny!
-Lol seriously, this is legendary
-Is this modern art or something like that?
Death art lol
-Andy Warhol! Move over! This is art!

* * *
After death.
Balloon Gum returns to the game’s waiting screen.
He clears his throat and shares his first impressions of the playthrough.
“Ah… that was such a waste. I almost cleared it completely.”
-What do you mean?
-The mission? You succeeded at the mission, so what’s the waste!?
-Baek Jun-su was right. He really was hitting Sohee Yun’s hand with the ball. He’s using his head as a weapon, right?
Where on earth are you? lol
I almost beat it all ㅋㅋㅋㅋ
-You basically cleared it. You smashed almost all the zombie’s teeth with your head
Legend hole-in-one lol
Oh man, my stomach hurts so bad I’m dying, seriously ㅠㅠ hahaha
.
.
.
Countless messages mock him. It’s the kind of situation that could easily upset someone.
But whether it’s a familiar sight for Balloon Gum, he doesn’t mind and continues the broadcast.
“Ah. Anyway, I cleared the mission, right? Right? Thanks for the mission money.”
You rejected it, remember? lol
Almost. Almost. Hahaha.
I’m dying laughing hahahahaha
I actually didn’t expect you to really do that lol
“I’ll go back in. Now I’m going for real. I’ve got the feel for it now, you know?”
-Going in for generations
-They say the feel was picked up by your future grandchildren.
-Let’s go for generations~
“Again. Go.”

* * *
Balloon Gum continued attempting after that, but there was no significant progress. Getting surrounded by Zombies and dying was routine.
Even after securing the bathroom, he’d die next from scratching himself on window glass and contracting tetanus, or tumbling down the Stairs while fleeing….
“This is garbage. The game really sucks.”
Truly showcasing a variety of deaths. His challenge came to an end for now.
“Let me just check how Almond handles this for a moment.”
He ultimately decided to follow his Senior’s approach. He searches briefly for Almond’s video.
It’s a clip of him neutralizing Zombies to secure the bathroom.
The title has a comedic feel: “When I Need to Crap, I Kill Zombies.”
“…What, what is this?”
The video content was entirely different.
“How do you do this!? The starting position is completely different, isn’t it? And doesn’t this look even more disadvantageous?”
-Don’t try to dodge the thug’s attacks lol lol just don’t watch that lol
-Isn’t the reference point wrong?
-Almond’s game looks harder lol lol
Balloon Gum watches several clips, repeatedly muttering “Wow… wow…”
“But if you do it like this, it shouldn’t work, right? Almond died, didn’t he?”
-Nope
-Almond is still alive
-He’s streaming right now. Want to check it out?
Balloon Gum was shocked. The situation Almond faced was far harsher than what he’d experienced. Yet he still hasn’t lost his first life.
“He’s alive? Still on the first run?”
-Yeah
-Even doing well lol
-Cultural shock; the streamer is actually alive in the game?!
“Then let me just peek at how things are progressing now. Can you really do it like this….”
Balloon Gum enters Almond’s broadcast out of curiosity.
“Wow. He’s got the bathroom, the convenience store….”
Just as the viewers said, Almond seemed to have quite a comfortable setup. He’s building things more systematically than expected.
“He’s even doing laundry? That’s incredible. So he’s expanding his territory by lowering the fire doors?”
-Wow lol
-He really set up house lol
-Oh who’s the convenience store girl lol so cute
-The quality really is different.
“There’s even a Colleague NPC! Wow. The convenience store start is pretty good, isn’t it?”
…While entertaining such dangerous thoughts.
“Huh?”
Balloon Gum is startled.
Almond has encountered someone.
From Balloon Gum’s perspective, I recognized them immediately—they were the thugs who had been beating me senseless just moments ago.
“Those wretched bastards? They’re alive?!”
Baek Jun-su’s Group.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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