Debut or Die - Chapter 284

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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A Fatal Illness if I Don’t Debut – Episode 284
Cold sweat dripped down my face.
Well, it was sweat from hiking, but the situation made it feel chilling.
Everything’s completely screwed.
‘An airplane crash?’
I’d never heard this before.
‘Think… think this through first.’
I had no way to accurately verify the exact reason Park Moon-dae’s parents had passed away.
…Park Moon-dae had already emptied out his one-room apartment and organized all his belongings.
I could only confirm his parents’ names and ages, so I ran a few searches with their residential area, name, and surname just in case, but no accident came up.
‘If that’s the case, it must be a common incident that wouldn’t have become major news….’
A traffic accident naturally came to mind. So I let others misunderstand it that way.
Like Ryu Chung-woo, for instance.
-My bringing up aftereffects from a traffic accident must have sounded tone-deaf.
Statistically it was probable, and even if it wasn’t, there’d be no one to prove otherwise.
But piercing through that probability, a completely different accident emerged as the cause.
And me? Damn it, I’ve flown on airplanes just fine and even gone skydiving.
“….”
Hell.
I realized I still had water in my mouth and swallowed it.
The water bottle was nearly empty. I could hear a sound from the digital watch on my wrist.
The time I was taking to respond.
-Tick tock.
‘I don’t have any excuses… that would reasonably work.’
I’m essentially trapped between a rock and a hard place.
The traffic accident, the fire, my oversensitivity about Ryu Chung-woo’s incident—everything fits too perfectly with Ryu Gun-woo’s story.
And either way, denying something I’ve already confirmed as fact won’t work.
‘This guy’s almost certain now.’
He’d analyzed how my words and actions didn’t match up with Park Moon-dae’s past at all, mulled it over several times, and then brought this up.
I slowly closed the water bottle and my mind raced.
Ryu Gun-woo and Park Moon-dae.
-Tick tock.
“….”
Right. If I construct a hypothesis as realistically as possible, there is one thing I could pull out.
‘Add amnesia plus one more psychiatric condition, and it works.’
The psychopathological explanation that Park Moon-dae confused Ryu Gun-woo’s situation with his own.
Since I’d received tremendous help from ‘Ryu Gun-woo’ and had extensive emotional exchanges, I became confused in the process of recovering my memories.
‘But… if I use this as an excuse, wouldn’t I end up in the hospital?’
Activity suspension level. This is… damn it, I’d be better off talking about the status window.
‘What, explain that I have some status window no one else can see? What kind of nonsense is that.’
If I’m lucky, this will just be mistaken for some kind of delusion.
‘Either way, all roads lead to a psychiatric ending.’
Dismissed entirely.
-Tick-tock.
Time marches on regardless.
Ryu Chung-woo—I don’t even need to look to know he’s still staring at me. The weight of his gaze is like a countdown timer all on its own.
‘This bastard deliberately cornered me until I had nowhere left to run.’
My stamina is shot, there’s no one else around, and he’s eliminated every other variable that might’ve let me talk my way out of this.
And now I’m running out of time to stall, but my mind refuses to conjure up any brilliant solution.
‘Damn it, like anything brilliant is going to materialize.’
I’m completely boxed in.
-Tick-tock.
This won’t work. I have to say something.
I opened my mouth to spout some ridiculous nonsense starting with ‘I don’t remember the airplane crash, just vague images of fire from the explosion and some accident during the chaos, so there’s been a misunderstanding….’
But someone beat me to it.
…The person himself.
“If it’s hard to talk about, I understand.”
“…!”
“Tell me if you feel like it.”
Ryu Chung-woo said this in an eerily calm tone, then simply placed his water bottle into his bag.
And he turned away lightly.
“Shall we head down?”
“….”
That was it. Ryu Chung-woo began walking slowly.
I shut my mouth and followed him down the mountain.
But the tension didn’t fade. I knew the answer was simply delayed, not forgotten.
And now I’d have to come up with a reason for why I couldn’t answer right away.
‘This is maddening.’
And so began that unbearably awkward life back at the dormitory.

* * *
And a few days later.
“You… what are you doing?”
It was 2 AM. Bae Sae-jin had come out for water and nearly stumbled when he spotted me sitting on the living room sofa before uttering those words.
“I can’t sleep.”
“Then… why don’t you just go to bed and lie down?”
“I don’t feel like it.”
Bae Sae-jin stared at me with his mouth agape, and I deliberately avoided his gaze.
It would be hilarious if I’d essentially passed the baton to him like this.
But I wonder if there’s anyone with thick enough skin to go back to their room and sleep comfortably at the same time as their roommate in this situation.
After my roommate pointed out the contradictions in my life piece by piece and even gave me time to answer, here I was.
And then there was this ominous calm where he hadn’t even mentioned the topic for days.
‘It’s not like we’re in the eye of a storm.’
I’d rather deal with that lunatic who lies every time he opens his mouth and causes a scene. What the hell is he thinking about?
‘Damn it.’
I held back a sigh and leaned my back against the sofa.
Still, if I fell completely asleep in the living room, it would be too obvious, so I planned to go back once my head cooled down enough to become sluggish.
‘The trick of killing time until I’m drowsy enough to fall asleep the moment my head hits the pillow has been working.’
But Bae Sae-jin seemed to have different thoughts.
He looked at me with an enigmatic expression, then his face shifted to one of realization.
And he asked with a face full of anticipation.
“Park Moon-dae, want to swap rooms with me?”
Seriously.
“No, it’s not that I don’t want to use my room—it’s just that you look like you’re doing badly!”
“….”
How transparent.
I hesitated for a moment, then held back a sigh. And I shook my head.
“I don’t intend to swap.”
“…Really?”
“Yes. Well, it should be fine once I get through this.”
It has to be fine.
If we comeback and film content while things remain awkward like this, it’ll all fall apart again. It’s just building up the nightmare of the Summer Package all over again.
‘So I do need to resolve this somehow.’
But there’s no way. No explanation that Ryu Chung-woo would accept.
I rested my head against the sofa. My mouth tasted bitter.
Bae Sae-jin drank his water as intended, then quietly came over beside me.
“Well, Ryu Chung-woo… he’s a good guy, right?”
“…Yes. I know that too.”
“Right, that’s it. You too! You’re a good guy!”
“….”
I’m going to wake someone up, you bastard.
Bae Sae-jin’s ears flushed red as he lowered the volume, then after clearing his throat several times, he spoke in a quieter voice.
“Some people just don’t mesh well together, but… it doesn’t seem like that’s the case with you two.”
“….”
“If there’s anything uncomfortable about him, just tell him honestly. Don’t stay out in the living room.”
I paused for a moment, then let out a soft laugh.
“That sounds like advice born from experience.”
“Yeah.”
I thought he’d be startled, but Bae Sae-jin unexpectedly nodded with surprising seriousness.
“I prefer the living room for myself, but it doesn’t seem like you’re particularly comfortable there.”
“….”
“You want to get along well with Chung-woo, right? He’s a pretty easygoing guy, so he’ll listen if you just tell him.”
I’m sorry, but it’s the opposite situation. He’s probably the one uncomfortable with me.
I shook my head. There was no point in explaining this to him—it would only create a complicated situation he’d struggle to understand.
I’d just handle this smoothly and send him off.
“I’ll give it a try. Thank you for the advice.”
“Mm, well, if that’s the case, that’s good. Sleep well.”
“Yes. You get some rest too.”
Bae Sae-jin walked into his room with his shoulders relaxed. He seemed to think he’d accomplished something.
‘So that’s what being a hyung is like.’
Watching him, my mood inexplicably lightened. I laughed, then suddenly recalled what Bae Sae-jin had said.
‘Ryu Chung-woo will listen if you just tell him…’
“….”
I lay in the living room and replayed my thoughts.
This time, I didn’t focus on finding ‘an explanation that wouldn’t seem strange coming from me.’
Instead, I concentrated on ‘what Ryu Chung-woo actually wanted to hear.’
I arranged the series of events he’d experienced leading up to this question in chronological order and tried to fit the pieces together.
“….”
And a few hours later.
“Phew.”
I’d reached a conclusion.
It was somewhat amusing, but Bae Sae-jin’s attempt at being a hyung had actually worked.
On the drive back after finishing a recording schedule that day, I made a proposal to Ryu Chung-woo.

* * *
My proposal was straightforward.
-How about we exercise Thursday morning?
-In the morning?
-Yes. That’s the only time we have available.
Now that I’m spending all my time preparing for the comeback, body management has shifted primarily to diet and quick, intense calorie-burning routines.
As expected, it meant I had no time for leisurely exercise—this proposal essentially meant I’d be using one of my few meals and rest periods each week for a workout instead.
Ryu Chung-woo looked a bit puzzled, but soon nodded.
-Sure, that works.
And now, as the promised time arrived and we came out to exercise, he seemed slightly surprised.
“This place is okay?”
“Of course.”
It was that same hiking trail I’d grown tired of visiting these past few weeks.
“Let’s go.”
With no time for further conversation, I immediately began jogging lightly.
“Huff.”
Now that early summer was approaching, the mountain had grown even hotter.
There were usually hikers in the morning, but the weather had thinned the crowds—it remained quiet.
Which was actually perfect.
‘No one to eavesdrop.’
I stopped my pace at the mountainside where people had nearly disappeared.
Of course, stopping wasn’t solely because of the lack of people.
“Hmm?”
“I don’t think we need to go all the way to the summit as you said. The view is best from here.”
“Oh, really?”
Ryu Chung-woo looked a bit awkward, but soon nodded. Then he turned his gaze to the scenery.
“It’s gotten lusher.”
“It really has.”
I briefly matched his rhythm, gazing at the beautiful landscape, then steadied my breathing.
And I timed it.
‘By now, he would have figured it out.’
Coming by the exact route he’d questioned me about gave him time to prepare mentally.
Actually, he probably suspected something from the moment I suddenly proposed exercising.
‘The answer to the contradiction he pointed out.’
Sure enough, Ryu Chung-woo slowly opened his mouth.
“…So, you have something you want to say?”
I shook my head.
It wasn’t that I suddenly had something to say—I’d come up with an excuse that fit the situation perfectly enough to reverse things.
What I’d thought of last night after hearing Bae Sae-jin’s words was something different.
“I don’t have anything I want to say… but I do have something I need to say.”
It was a matter of justification.
Ryu Chung-woo had every reason to demand an answer to this question.
‘He figured I was acting out because of my parents’ accident, and he just let it slide.’
After that, whenever I suddenly remembered something and went looking for Ryu Gun-woo, he cooperated without resistance—simply because he thought he might be a relative of mine.
But the reasons and explanations I’d given along the way didn’t match what was actually happening.
‘It’s a miracle he’s not furious.’
He hadn’t dug anything up. He’d simply noticed the contradictions that appeared deceptive as events unfolded.
‘Honestly, even if I’d found a decent excuse here, the moment another contradiction popped up, it would be over….’
At that point, group or no group, it wouldn’t be strange if he flipped and cut ties with me.
And yet this guy—he understood the whole situation and waited quietly for the right timing without saying a word for quite a while.
Probably until I recovered my physical strength and mental state.
‘The reason he mentioned it at the summit was probably just to let me refresh a bit with some exercise, then tell me quietly….’
This wasn’t malice or meddling.
So at minimum, I’d concluded I needed to tell him the truth—stripped of all the unrealistic stuff like resets and status windows.
‘Whether that satisfies him is another matter entirely.’
Either way, there’s no explanation that would truly satisfy. So if a person has any conscience at all, they should do at least this much.
I sighed, then spoke slowly.
“Hyung.”
“Yeah.”
“I know my words and the situation might not seem to match right now.”
I reflexively reached into my pocket, then remembered I didn’t smoke anymore and pulled my hand back out.
Then I spoke slowly.
“I’ve never lied to you.”
“….”
“Even if I try to explain, I don’t really understand the situation myself… No, it’s not a mental issue. I’m not confusing myself with someone else or identifying as a different person.”
This guy could send me to a hospital with the best of intentions if I’m not careful. I held back a sigh and rubbed the back of my neck.
“I just… acted as myself.”
Ryu Chung-woo didn’t argue. I continued.
“It’s true that car accidents and fires make me uncomfortable because of my parents’ accident. Of course, you might think I made up a false reason during the summer package and acted out….”
“Wait.”
Ryu Chung-woo interrupted, looking somewhat flustered.
Then he gave a bitter smile.
“Moon-dae. I think there’s a misunderstanding… I’m not saying I don’t trust you or trying to interrogate you.”
What?
“During the summer package? Anyone who saw you then would never think that pain was fabricated. I don’t think you lied.”
I stared blankly at what he was saying.
“And… you nearly died saving my life. That’s an absolute, unchanging fact. Right?”
That’s….
“Who would get angry at their lifesaver over words not matching up? Don’t worry about that.”
Ryu Chung-woo added slowly.
“What I want to ask you is this, Moon-dae.”
“….”
“Do you need help right now?”

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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