Black-Haired Dad Isn’t Something You Reap - Chapter 10

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 10. With Effort, Even a Ruffian Can Succeed (3)
“Oh.”
Now that I think about it, I didn’t clock in at the Ministry of Law today.
Because of those bureaucratic fools who insisted they couldn’t reduce sentences for the Political Detention Center inmates even if it killed them, I had been visiting the Ministry of Law once a day to roll around on the floor for thirty minutes, ranting and raving.
Everyone said that since insulting the Emperor was such a grave crime—130-year sentences, 70-year sentences—a slight reduction wouldn’t even be noticeable. But regardless, I had made a promise to myself, and I had to keep it.
After days of this, those bureaucratic fools started carrying earplugs with them everywhere.
Did they think I’d give up? Well, let’s see who wins—you or me.
This sort of thing always goes to the person with the most persistence.
After finishing my duties and returning to the Palace, the construction noise was still deafening. At first it was merely satisfying, but day after day of it made life unbearable.
I was just thinking I needed to come up with some countermeasure when I heard a distant voice calling out, “Pisha!”
Even if I tried to pretend I hadn’t heard, it was already too late.
My aunt had already spotted me and came rushing over, sweeping me up into her arms and spinning me around.
“Pisha! You skipped class again!”
I spoke solemnly: “Aunt, please decide whether you intend to scold me or dote on me—choose one.”
At my stern words, my aunt finally seemed to remember her dignity. She set me down and cleared her throat awkwardly.
If I left her alone, she’d start nagging again. In situations like this, it’s better to strike first.
“Aunt.”
“Yes?”
“The construction noise is dreadfully loud. I was thinking of taking a brief respite away, if you would permit it.”
The Imperial Family’s seasonal villas were unpredictable—that blockhead could show up with a lover at any moment. I wanted to use the construction as an excuse to retreat somewhere quiet and peaceful.
If I happened to spot that blockhead while passing by, it would ruin my mood for the entire day.
“Why not just come to the Lorowi Mansion?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“The bathroom is terrible.”
What kind of house doesn’t have a proper toilet in this day and age, Aunt?
Since all the revenue was being funneled into war supplies, the conditions at the Lorowi Mansion were abysmal—especially the bathroom. It was horrifying: foul-smelling, freezing cold, and filthy.
The toilet in the Princess Palace had a heated seat and even a bidet, and unless I lost my mind, I wasn’t about to stay in such a place.
As I explained this matter-of-factly, my aunt made a truly shocking statement.
“What do you mean? If it’s a matter of cleanliness, I’ll take care of it! I can do it with my own hands!”
“Ugh….”
I’m disgusted. Truly disgusted.
My aunt is absolutely disgusting.
Goosebumps erupted all over my spine, so I quickly had Emily position herself as a barrier in front of me.
“Kazelnu Lorowi is hereby forbidden from entering the Princess Palace for the foreseeable future.”
“Pisha!”
Ugh, disgusting. Go away.
With Emily and the other attendants forming a human wall, I instinctively grabbed my ears and bolted for my bedchamber.

✦ ✦ ✦
The next day, I left the construction noise behind, stamped my attendance at the Ministry of Law, and stepped into the Political Detention Center—a place of unparalleled coziness.
Quiet, appropriately dim, and full of friends.
Come to think of it, this was my ultimate sanctuary.
Having sent word ahead to the Jailer, a red carpet was rolled out the moment I arrived. I passed through the corridor where guards saluted and found myself before the cell where Marshmallow was imprisoned.
Marshmallow, having been tipped off by the Jailer, waited for me with remarkable composure.
As the attendants opened the cell door and arranged the interior, he asked calmly.
“Why me, of all people?”
“You…”
“Yes.”
“You’re so soft and squishy…”
“…”
The moment I first saw you, I felt it was fate. I thought to myself that I simply must sleep on that belly of yours.
Isn’t sleeping atop something soft and enormous the dream of every child?
Ever since I became this small again, I’ve had an unconscious urge to keep doing this, but whenever I come to my senses, I find myself asleep inside a wardrobe. Dark, cramped, and cushioned places are the perfect hideaway.
One morning, I even crawled into a closet in my sleep and dozed off there, which caused Emily quite the panic when she came looking for me.
“You’ll regret this.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m… a living creature.”
What an incomprehensible thing to say.
But my resolve was firm, and Emily had already laid out a clean carpet and prepared everything for sleep. All that remained was for Marshmallow to lie down and become my cushion.
“Lie down on the floor at once.”
At my solemn command, Marshmallow answered obediently and lay down gently on the ground.
Delighted, I crawled up onto Marshmallow’s belly and settled myself. But as Marshmallow breathed in and out, I couldn’t resist the recoil from his movements and tumbled down with a rumble.
“…!”
“I told you, didn’t I? I’m a living creature.”
This won’t do. My dream cannot crumble over something so trivial.
I had so looked forward to reading a mystery novel up there!
I even brought my most treasured book to fully savor the experience!
This is something that will be out of print sixteen years from now and impossible to find on the market! When I first discovered it in the Imperial Library, I was so delighted I screamed and even fainted—Emily was so worried!
“Roll over! Your back is relatively flat!”
But this isn’t it either!
Marshmallow obediently rolled over as commanded, but once I lay down on his back, it wasn’t what I had imagined.
His back has no padding—it’s hard! Marshmallow, what have you been doing all these years without putting any meat on your back?
“If my back were that soft, I wouldn’t be able to walk, Your Highness.”
“When do you ever say anything right?!”
“My apologies.”
Ugh, this useless creature!
In my frustration, I began spanking Marshmallow’s belly, and Emily along with the other attendants frantically used body language to signal him to act hurt. Marshmallow, being exceptionally perceptive, immediately pretended to be in agony.
Satisfied, I solemnly declared that I would forgive Marshmallow and continued my deliberation.
I cannot tell Marshmallow to stop breathing, yet his back is rigid and hard.
If front and back won’t work, what about the side?
It’s quite a brilliant idea, if I do say so myself.
“Yepida! Try lying on your side!”
I’ll give up on feeling softness with my entire body. I’ll be satisfied with just my back and lower back!
“Kyaaah!”
What is this—a completely fluffy back support! So bouncy! It’s the best!
I love this so much!
I rolled my body this way and that, satisfied, then searched for a book. Once I spread it open with snacks beside me, Marshmallow squirmed and spoke in bewilderment.
“Your Highness, surely I must remain in this position until you finish reading?”
“That’s right.”
“I see….”
“That’s right.”
What can you do? Blame yourself for being born a subject in the centralized Kisomalos Empire.
As I said this and crunched potato chips, Marshmallow gave up and read the book in my hands alongside me.
“Piiiiishaaaaaa!”
Seriously, does that woman have nothing else to do? She chased me all the way here after I issued a ban on entering the Princess Palace?
My aunt burst through the Prison door without my permission and rattled off complaints—lift the ban on the Princess Palace, did I skip classes, she heard I was going on a retreat so why the Prison of all places—on and on she went.
Then she sat before me and pounded the ground loudly.
The narrow Prison cell became crowded with people.
“Does Aunt have nothing better to do?”
“Marquis Lorowi, I apologize for greeting you in such a posture.”
“And who is this Marshmallow who looks like the Minister of Finance!”
“Do I… really resemble my brother that much?”
You really do look alike, Marshmallow. Why are you shocked about it now?
Once my aunt learned of Marshmallow’s identity, she grew flustered and formally introduced herself, and the two exchanged some pointless pleasantries.
“As Your Highness’s education supervisor, I’ve also been curious why the head of Lorowi continues to remain in the capital. Has something happened?”
“Ah, well.”
Why did this suddenly become serious?
Aunt, you weren’t just coming to the Imperial Palace because you had nothing to do?
“Chiron’s movements have become suspicious lately.”
“Do you mean Duke Chiron who left here the other day?”
“That’s right. That bastard suddenly went home and started gathering private soldiers.”
Hmm… Chiron. The name sounds familiar somehow?
“As winter approaches, gathering private soldiers to prepare for foreign invasions is not uncommon, is it?”
“No. That tiger-faced fool is dragging around his newly acquired soldiers and training them, so there’s no battlefield left for us to take. No battlefield, I tell you.”
“His departure from this place was strange in itself. There must have been some reason for it.”
“Right. That bastard said something about atoning, staying here until his niece comes of age—and now suddenly he’s changed his mind. What wind blew through him?”
Ugh, Marshmallow being so soft is nice, but this is so comfortable that sleep is creeping in.
My back is cushioned, and the sound of Marshmallow’s heartbeat and the gentle gurgling of digestion from his stomach strangely calm my mind, and drowsiness washes over me in waves.
“Boni will be fine during the day, so play quietly….”
Hehe, I don’t know. I should sleep.
I tossed the book I’d been reading aside and wiped my oil-stained hands carelessly on my clothes, then let out heavy, drowsy breaths.
Just as I was about to drift off, my aunt made that strange, guttural sound, and it utterly ruined my mood.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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