Became The Leader of a Girl Group Destined To Fail - Chapter 195

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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Chapter 195.

I must have cried myself to sleep.
When I opened my eyes, I was in my room.
Fresh snow still fell outside the window, the sky a pale, hazy white.
Ah, this….
A familiar scene.

-Hello, Baek Nok-ha.

…I wondered why you hadn’t shown up.
After all the messages I sent you.
You damned thing.
At least my phone came back with me intact—thank goodness for that much.
The conversation window with Cotton Ball Entity remained just as it was.

“Cotton Ball.”
-You finally succeeded, and now you come looking for me again?
“That day…. You made it snow, didn’t you?”
-Of course. There’s no one else who could do something like that.

There’s something oddly romantic about this.
Using snow to save my mother.

-Think of it as a Christmas gift.
“What gift? I earned this. It’s the product of a fair trade.”
-…You really are….

Cotton Ball Entity exhaled a sigh without even opening its mouth.
It didn’t even have a nose.

-How does it feel, Baek Nok-ha? Coming back?
“….”

I couldn’t answer.
Cotton Ball Entity seemed to have read my heart well enough.

It’s nice that my mother is here, but it feels a bit empty without the members.
“Being empty isn’t the problem.”

If only everyone….
If only they were all living well.
If only they had lived happily together as StillBlue.
Maybe then it would have been fine somehow.
But seeing how much they’d changed, I couldn’t accept this.
I couldn’t accept it.
I tried to tell myself not to judge, that they’d chosen their own paths, that I had no right to say anything—but I couldn’t.
I just couldn’t.

-Anyway. I’ve seen everything I needed to see, so I’m going to—
“Wait.”

Where did you think you were running off to?
I caught the Cotton Ball Entity.

“You’re hiding something from me. You need to tell me everything before you leave.”
-I have no idea what you’re talking about.
“Yes, you do.”

I placed the Cotton Ball Entity on my bed.

“I thought something was off. In some worlds, Baek Nok-ha exists, and in others, she doesn’t. If what you said is true—that these are just simple parallel worlds—then Baek Nok-ha and Yun Chung should be the same in every single one of them.”
-….

Somehow.
I had to set things right again.
Something was wrong with this world.
Call me strange if you want.
Call me stubborn if you want.

“Explain it to me.”

In the end, I had no choice but to confront the Cotton Ball Entity.
This was a broken world.

-Why me?
“Because you changed my fate. I think I deserve to hear it at this point.”
-Do you really think that, Baek Nok-ha?

The Cotton Ball Entity’s mouth split wide open in laughter.

-I’m sorry, but this is what you chose. You chose to change your fate, you made that choice.
“Yes. So now it’s time to hear it. Since I chose it… I’m allowed to hear it, aren’t I?”

The Cotton Ball Entity fell silent for a long while.
Though it had no eyes, I could sense it.
The Cotton Ball Entity was delighted right now.

-Yes. I’ll return all the truth to you.
“…!”
-But in exchange, you must tell me the truth as well.

The Cotton Ball Entity rose slowly into the empty air as it spoke.

-Then, the result of our wager back then will come to light.

The result I’ve been waiting for all this time.
The Cotton Ball Entity spoke thus, and swallowed me whole.

***

When I opened my eyes.
I was gripping the railing of a bridge over the Han River, weeping uncontrollably.
A day so bitterly cold it pierced to the bone.
Wearing nothing but a thin Stage costume.
I tried to stop crying, wondering what kind of situation this was.
But the tears wouldn’t stop.
No—my own body wouldn’t obey my will.
I wept endlessly like that.
Then I began to pull myself up against the railing.
As if I had made some terrible decision.

‘No!’

Faced with an absurd situation, I tried to regain control of my body.
Yet my body continued to lean helplessly beyond the railing.
But in that moment.

-Wait. You’re awfully impatient, aren’t you?

The Cotton Ball Entity appeared before me.

-Such a waste of talent… How about you use it for me instead of throwing it into the water?
“W-what are you saying?”

The moment those words left my lips.
I was startled.
This voice…!

-In return, I’ll grant your wish too. Whatever you desire.
“I-I don’t understand what you’re s-saying.”
-You want to be loved, don’t you?

The Cotton Ball Entity narrowed its eyes and smiled at me.

-You want to be recognized as an idol and loved, don’t you?
“…W-what does that have to do with y-you?”
-What do you mean? I just think it would be nice if you were loved and brought happiness to so many people as an idol.
“W-why?”
-That’s not your concern. What really matters is this.
“….”
-Do you want to be loved as an idol?

I remained silent for a long time.

-You want to be loved. You want someone to listen to your songs, don’t you? Isn’t that right?

The Cotton Ball Entity stared intently at me, then broke into a wide grin.

-Yun Chung.

!

-Yun Chung. A ten-year veteran idol. Or rather, can I even call her an idol? Her group disbanded after just one year. Now she’s practically a civilian. She takes the stage occasionally, on very small venues. But doesn’t she get booed every single time? Because of her stage fright, she can’t showcase her true abilities.
“….”
-How does it feel to beg and scrape your way onto a stage, only to receive nothing but jeers?

The Cotton Ball Entity spoke thus and flew toward me.
I was startled and fell backward.

-Isn’t it despair?
“…!”
-Truth is, among all the idols alive today, you’re among the most talented. If I were you, I’d feel utterly wronged.

The Cotton Ball Entity settled onto my knees as I lay on my back.

-A single tiny button fastened wrong. A single trivial connection made in error.

The Cotton Ball Entity extracted my memories and showed them to me anew.
Yun Chung’s past memories.
A panorama of moments when I was tormented by the jealousy of fellow trainees at my first agency.
From that point on, stage fright took root, and I could never perform at my true level.
Absurdly cast out from the debut lineup, I moved to a second agency.
At that agency, I met Kim Ryeo-yu.
And a deeper hell began.

-If you hadn’t encountered those few wrong people… what would you have been? If a god, cruel beyond measure, had given you different people as your connections?

The Cotton Ball Entity slipped into my embrace.

-What would you have been?

The Cotton Ball Entity asked me.

“…It would’ve been the same.”

I answered.

-…What?
“I… I am… g-garbage. Garbage that c-can’t be loved by anyone. So… even if I’d m-met different people. It would’ve been the same.”
-What are you saying?
“I m-met bad people, that’s… that’s true. But if I’d been str-stronger… if I h-had been….”

I clenched my fists.

“If I had been stronger, I would have overcome it.”
-Wait, didn’t you just hear what I said? You only ended up this way because you happened to encounter a small misfortune?
“Ah, no… Everyone else meets bad people too. It’s just… I’m the only one who couldn’t overcome it.”
-You’ve really been brainwashed properly, haven’t you?
“I’m n-not brainwashed!”
-….

Cotton Ball Entity looked at me with an extremely irritated expression.

-This isn’t fun at all.

Cotton Ball Entity let its fur droop limply.

-Do you have any idea how much energy I spent searching for someone like you?
“A l-lot…?”
-Yes. A tremendous amount. Enough to lose all hope in humanity entirely.
“I’m s-sorry… Even after all that effort, the best I could find was me….”
-Exactly my point.

Cotton Ball Entity paused for a moment.
Then it perked its fur back up.

-Yun Chung.
“Y-yes?”
-How about we make a wager to see if your words are right or mine are?
“A w-wager?”
-Yes. A wager.
“H-how would that work?”
-I’ll erase all your memories, all your trauma… and have you live out another person’s fate with only your talent intact.

I couldn’t respond.
But Cotton Ball Entity continued speaking excitedly.

-I’ll take half of your soul and place it into someone with a different fate. Then we can compare, can’t we? With the same talent, the same soul… but a different fate, how much do you think would change?

Cotton Ball Entity whooshed forward and stopped right before my eyes.

-I happen to know someone who’s perfect for this. You wanted to debut as an idol like her, but… there’s a girl who died in a traffic accident. I’ll put you into that girl’s body. The one destined to receive nothing but love her entire life.
“B-but…”
-If you still can’t be loved as an idol, then I’ll give up on you cleanly too.
“…!”

Cotton Ball Entity looked directly into my eyes and asked.

-Aren’t you curious? What if you’d been assigned a different fate, different connections instead? How would things have been?

Hearing those words, doubt bloomed in my heart too.
Was I really just unlucky?
Not because I was weak, not because I was stupid…
Just unlucky?
No.
Still…
I shook my head roughly.

“B-but I c-can’t abandon my m-mother and l-leave…”
-What?
“M-my mother… she o-only looks at me…”
-What are you saying? Weren’t you just about to jump?
“N-no! I j-just… I was just acting out in anger, I never really meant to jump.”
-…

Cotton Ball Entity looked at me with an exasperated expression.

-Fine. I’ll be generous. I’ll change one more fate for you. I’ll swap your mother with Baek Nok-ha’s mother. Since Baek Nok-ha had no family anyway, it works out if we switch them.
“I-is that even p-possible…?”
-Why wouldn’t it be? But in exchange, Yun Chung, your mother will become… not your mother, but Baek Nok-ha’s mother instead. Is that okay with you?
“…”

I thought for a long while before nodding.

“Th-that girl… had a m-much happier fate, right? So… my mother too… being that girl’s m-mother…”

My throat kept tightening.

“She’ll be much h-happier…”

Rather than a daughter who only ever fails and suffers.
Being the mother of a daughter who is always happy.
Mother would be happier too.
The Cotton Ball Entity stared at me as though utterly unable to comprehend my words.
Then let out a sigh.

-Fine. The deal is struck.
“…!”
-Now I’ll state my condition.
“W-what condition?”
-If you reach the pinnacle of Baek Nok-ha’s life… then I plan to return that soul to Yun Chung. But not in this world—in another world, to you there. And you’ll have to prove yourself once more in that place.

That you can succeed.
That with your own abilities, you can save yourself.
By your own hand.

-If you prove that, then I win. And when that happens, you’ll have to grant me my wish.

***

And then.
I opened my eyes again.

-How is it, Baek Nok-ha?

The Cotton Ball Entity was looking at me.

-Or should I call you Yun Chung now?
“Cotton Ball Entity, you….”
-Now you can admit it, can’t you? That I won the wager?

I couldn’t answer.
My words caught in my throat.
I was dazed.
I… I was originally Yun Chung.
The moment I saw that scene, all my memories from before merged together perfectly.
Yun Chung’s memories.
And Baek Nok-ha’s memories.

—Do you know what price I paid in exchange for changing the fates of those two people?
“…You must have paid quite a lot.”
—Because of you, I couldn’t intervene in the human world for a long time!
“…I’m sure that’s true.”
—You ungrateful human. Now you understand everything, don’t you? Just how good of a being I am?

It really was true.
I was taken aback. I had no idea there were such circumstances involved.

—Now we need to settle this, Baek Nok-ha.
“….”
—I won. You admit it too, right? That your fate was wrong, not that you were wrong?
“Mm.”
—You won’t admit it?!
“I… I admit it….”
—Finally!

The Cotton Ball Entity bounced with joy.

—Finally! This moment has come! I won! I won!

The Cotton Ball Entity grinned from ear to ear.

—Now it’s your turn to grant my wish!
“….”

Something felt unsettling.

“What… what is your wish?”
—Isn’t it obvious? What else could my wish be?
“….”
—Work as an idol until you die. Don’t rest, work yourself to death, and receive love from as many people as possible. Make as many humans happy as you can!

I see.

—The contract period is until death! How about it, aren’t you upset? Aren’t you frustrated?
“Hm?”
—What do you mean ‘hm’?

Cotton Ball Entity stopped, sensing something was off.
And I wasn’t the only one who found it strange.
I was puzzled too.

“That’s all?”

…The price for everything was merely that?
It seemed….
…like such a losing bargain for them, didn’t it?

-Then what else should there be? What could be harder than this? You said I’d have to work myself to death my whole life. I can’t rest even if I want to, can’t retire even if I want to! I’ll have to work even when I’m old!
“Mm-hmm.”

So what’s wrong with that?
It’s no different from my wish.
To live as an idol and die as an idol.
To spend my whole life with my fans.
That’s my dream….

“Alright, I’ll grant your wish.”
-…Somehow I feel like I’m the one losing here?

Cotton Ball Entity moved away from me, its voice tinged with unease.

“I said I’d grant your wish?”
-You have to win the award every year! Every single year!
“It won’t be easy, but I’ll do my best.”
-…This isn’t it. Something feels wrong.

Cotton Ball Entity’s fur drooped limply.

“Could I ask just one more favor instead?”
-Do you have no shame?
“It’s a good condition for you too. Just hear me out.”
-…What is it.

Cotton Ball Entity’s fur bristled as it glared at me with its absent eyes.

“Can you… turn me back to how I was? I want to go back to being Yun Chung… and be with my members.”
-What? You’re saying you’ll abandon everything you’ve built as Baek Nok-ha and return to that world?
“Yes. Because this is something I’m saying not as Yun Chung, but as Baek Nok-ha.”
-….
“Mom too… and StillBlue.”

The Cotton Ball Entity’s eyes softened, and it gazed at me intently.

“To return to Yun Chung’s destiny… to meet my members again.”

Only now could I admit it to myself.
I needed my members.
Not because they needed me.
But because I needed them.

“I really want to live as Yun Chung. With Mom.”

When the Cotton Ball Entity didn’t answer, I spoke again.
I had to convince it, no matter what.

“You won’t lose anything. You know it yourself—StillBlue was an idol group that brought happiness to so many people. It would bring far more joy than just one person like me.”
-….

So.
So I wanted to see my members again.
But I didn’t say that.
The Cotton Ball Entity thought for a while, then answered.

-Returning your mother is not a difficult task.
“Really?”
-But you must start from the beginning.
“…From the beginning?”

My heart sank.
If it’s the beginning…

-Yes. From the point when we met again. From that moment when you returned to Yun Chung while carrying Baek Nok-ha’s memories, you must start over from there.

If it’s that point…

“From the very beginning of Make a New Color?”
-Yes.
“Then… the members won’t have any memories of me right now, will they?”
-That’s how it would be.

Cotton Ball Entity looked up at me.

-You’re still going to start over, Yun Chung? Even though you’ll have to build everything from scratch again?

I looked down at Cotton Ball Entity.
And I spoke.
The answer that had been decided from the beginning.

“Yes.”

Cotton Ball Entity slowly opened its mouth and smiled—

-An excellent choice, Yun Chung!

It swallowed me whole.
The entire world turned white again.
Not the depths of winter.
But a midsummer world where sunlight shattered into fragments… pure white like that.

***

“Unnie?”

I was so drowsy.

“Unnie!”

I wanted to sleep just a little longer.

“Chung-chung. We promised to watch the sunrise together. You need to get up now.”
“That’s right, Chung. You’re the only one here who can drive….”
“Let’s just carry her on our backs. I think she’ll wake up once the cold air hits her.”

Mm…
One hand was checking my forehead for fever.
Another hand was gently tugging at my hair.
Another hand was shaking my arm.
And another was poking my cheek repeatedly.
Seriously.
I just want to sleep a little.
Who’s disturbing me…

“She’s awake!”
“Chung-chung, how unusual for you to sleep in like this. You’re always the first one up.”

…Huh?

“…Everyone….”

Why are they all here?
I stared blankly at my members.
Seo Baek-young, Kim Geum, Ryu Bora, Yeon Ju-hong….
They were all here.
I scrambled to sit up and looked around.
A familiar space.
My room that I shared with Seo Baek-young.

“What’s wrong? Why do you look so shocked? Did you have a nightmare?”
“It’s okay, our Yun Chung.”

My members patted me reassuringly.
I could only blink, unable to comprehend the situation.
What is this?
I hadn’t returned to the beginning of Make a New Color.
I’d returned to the original timeline.
Then could it be…!

“Wait, just a moment. My phone, my p-phone…!”

I quickly turned on my phone and checked my messages.
There was…

Mom

When you go see the sunrise today

Wrap a scarf around your neck

There’s a cold wave coming, a cold wave

You make your living with that throat of yours

Yet you won’t even take care of yourself, honestly

My mother’s messages had piled up.
My mother exists.
Is this a dream? Or reality?
I pinched my cheek for a moment to check.
The members and….
My mother.
We exist in the same world.
The world I’d yearned for even in my dreams is here now.
I kept alternating between looking at the members and reading my mother’s messages.
Back and forth, over and over.
The members were starting to look at me with concern in their eyes.
Then.
Ding!

Cotton Ball Entity

Yun Chung (formerly Baek Nok-ha)

You’re truly an ungrateful and utterly infuriating contractor

But if I don’t bind you with a debt, I’m certain you’ll try to deceive me again

So I’ve placed a very heavy debt upon you

I trust you won’t complain even if I assign you Quests as I please ^^

Contacting you on your personal phone instead of the usual number—that’s a special service.

What?

Ding!

[A new Quest has arrived.]
[Do you accept? (Yes/No)]
[Forcibly accepted (no choice given)]
[My Wish:
Win the Grand Prize solo at the next Platinum Music Awards
]
[Failure: StillBlue retirement delayed 3 years]

“Huh…?”

Cotton Ball Entity

Tongue out

Huh?!

“What’s wrong?”

Ryu Bora looked at me with genuine concern in her eyes.

“…No, it’s nothing.”

I looked at my members again.
I held them tight.
I had come back.

“Chung-chung, Su, I can’t breathe.”
“Chung, you had quite the nightmare.”
“Ugh. Unnie. Why are your arms so strong?!”
“…Sister. Calm down a bit….”

Everything had returned perfectly.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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