Became The Leader of a Girl Group Destined To Fail - Chapter 181

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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Chapter 181.

[Week 1 of August—this week’s #1 is… StillBlue!]

Back at the Dormitory after everyone had fallen asleep.
I slipped into the Living Room once more.
And I rewatched the clip from the Broadcasting Program we appeared on today.
Four weeks of promotions.
We’d extended our activities by one week beyond the originally planned three.
And today marked the final curtain call for this album cycle.
No one harbored any resentment about the extended run.
Rather, every member had simply struggled to hold back tears of joy.
Three consecutive weeks at #1.
In these times when the Broadcasting Program underwent restructuring, achieving #1 for more than two weeks had become extraordinarily difficult.
This was truly a meaningful record.
On the music streaming sites, 【Eternal Summer】 still held the top position.
And the physical album continued to sell steadily.

Give me memories that never end
Our sweltering days
Tell me they’ll
Never fade away
Eternal Summer
No Longer Wait

【Eternal Summer】 sung in someone else’s voice, not my own.
When would I grow accustomed to it?
In truth, StillBlue’s 【Eternal Summer】 differed slightly from Baek Nok-ha’s 【Eternal Summer】.
The lyrics were different, and we’d made subtle arrangements to suit each member’s vocal color.
Perhaps because of that, whenever I watched the 【Eternal Summer】 Stage performance.
After returning to my own world… I found myself thinking I would miss the members’ voices most of all.
The already grand Stage would feel even grander then.
When I was Baek Nok-ha, how immense was the burden of filling that Stage alone.
But during my time with StillBlue, I’d never once felt the Stage lacking.
I pressed the rewind button.

[Today… thank you for giving us our fifteenth #1. This album, as you all know, was also created for 【Forever Blue】—Ever Blue. Did you all notice?]

I noticed the fans waving their light sticks with joy at Seo Baek-young’s question.
Soon after, Seo Baek-young’s acceptance speech for first place began.

[Thank you for giving us a season like an eternal flame that will never extinguish. Even when I’m very, very old… I don’t think I’ll ever forget this summer. We at StillBlue will strive to give EVEL members such a season, such joy. And….]

Seo Baek-young looked at me as she spoke.
I was barely holding back tears, too busy embracing the other members to think straight.

[Yun Chung, who worked so hard planning this entire album, Geum, who created such beautiful songs, Ju-hong, who labored over our concept, and Bora, who directed the color film and was the greatest contributor to promoting this album. I’m so proud of my members. I… I don’t even know how happy and joyful it makes me to be part of StillBlue. You’ll stay with me and be StillBlue forever, right?]

The members nodded, holding back their tears.
Among them, I was nodding too.
Why did I make a promise I couldn’t keep?
Foolish Baek Nok-ha.

“Nok-ha.”
“Ugh!!”

Ah, you startled me.

“Nok-ha. Why aren’t you sleeping? What are you doing?”

Yeon Ju-hong had approached my side without me noticing and was looking at me.
Geez.
You really scared me.

“Why did you come without making a sound?!”
“No… I made plenty of noise, but Yun Chung didn’t notice!”
“…Is that so?”

Well then, I have nothing to say.

“It’s 3 AM right now. Why aren’t you sleeping and watching our first place video? Do you like it that much?”
“Of course I like it that much.”
“I mean, I like it that much too.”

Yeon Ju-hong had just woken up and smiled with puffy eyes.
Geez.
You really look like you don’t know anything.

“Still, you need to get some sleep, Yun Chung. We have to start preparing for our concert tomorrow.”
“You’re right.”
“As for me.”

Yeon Ju-hong rubbed her eyes sleepily.

“The album debuting at third place is great, holding first for three weeks is great… everything’s great, but performing at a concert is the best, Yun Chung.”
“Why?”
“Just because. It’s like the dream of idols, you know? Something about singing in front of a concert hall packed with fans.”

That’s true.
The feeling when we hit number one is incomparable joy, but.
The feeling when I first stepped into that concert hall was joy on an entirely different plane.

“But sometimes… that’s why I get anxious.”
“Anxious?”
“What if I mess up? What if I let down our members?”
“You’re still thinking like that?”

Our timid maknae.
Sometimes she seems the most solid and sharp, but.
In moments like this, she’s unmistakably just the youngest member.

“Everyone only praises your skills now.”
“That’s because my sisters are there… I think they’re just praising me along with them.”
“That’s not how it works. Your skills are something you’ve built yourself.”

And truthfully, Yeon Ju-hong has made remarkable progress.

Yeon Ju-hong

Vocal: 75/100
Dance: 80/100
Appearance: 95/100
Charisma: 98/100
Entertainment Sense: 91/100
Individual Special Abilities:
Celebrity Appeal (87/100)
Fan Service (82/100)
? (?/100)
Recommended Development Stats:
Celebrity Appeal
Fan Service
Vocal
Dance

Every single stat was soaring, as if it had sprouted wings and taken flight.

“More than anything… you practically planned this entire concept yourself. You’re the one who followed Bora around adding all those mise-en-scène touches.”

All the merchandise included in the album packaging was conceived by Yeon Ju-hong as well.
Watching her glued to SNS every single day, struggling to understand what the fans needed—it was both heartbreaking and impressive.

“That’s… because I really wanted to do it.”
“Really?”

I’d been worried that maybe Yeon Ju-hong had done it out of a sense of obligation, feeling she had to pull her own weight.

“I… love my unnies.”

Yeon Ju-hong yawned and rested her head against my shoulder.
She must be tired.
The way she couldn’t fight off her drowsiness made it clear.

“When I look at my unnies, I just… think things like, ‘This outfit would look so perfect on them…. Baek-young unnie is so tall, she’d look absolutely stunning in something like this…’ and I get these ideas. And Yun Chung unnie has such beautiful eyes, if we highlight them like this…. I get those thoughts too. Actually, I think I’m always having thoughts like that.”
“So it wasn’t something you were trying to do—it just came naturally.”
“Yeah. I just wanted to do everything for them. Because I know how amazing my unnies are, how incredible they are. I wanted other people to know it too.”

What a thoughtful thing to say.
All the melancholy I’d been feeling moments before simply vanished.
Laughter bubbled up from my chest.
Is this why people enjoy raising children? I found myself wondering.

“So this concept too… I planned it by imagining what it would’ve been like if I’d gone to high school with you all. I never got to go to high school myself.”

That’s right.
Yeon Ju-hong had dropped out of high school not long after enrolling for Make a New Color.
By now, she’d probably already passed the GED exam.
Though she’d done it for her dreams, I always carried a quiet sadness—a weight in my heart—wondering if she’d sacrificed such a crucial period of her life.

“But I don’t regret or feel sad about not going to high school.”
“Why? You would’ve been incredibly popular if you’d gone. It would’ve been so much fun.”
“Well, according to what my mom said, school memories are fun because of good friends and all the different events that happen at school, right?”

I didn’t answer.
Truth is, I’ve only been to school up through middle school myself….
Yun Chung and Baek Nok-ha were the same.
Both of them barely attended middle school and didn’t have any friends there.

“Exactly.”
“You didn’t go to school either, so why are you acting like you know!”
“…Well, I can’t exactly say I don’t know when I do.”
“That’s true, I guess?”

Yeon Ju-hong laughed softly.

“I’d rather think of it as spending my school days with you all as my friends. And diverse events? We’ve experienced way more of those than regular students. Sure, kids in school probably have fun, but I have fun too.”
“…It wasn’t hard, was it? There really were so many difficult things.”
“Life is supposed to be hard. That’s what makes it meaningful.”
“Who told you that?”
“You did.”

Did I say something like that?
My memory was fuzzy….

“So I hope the time we spend together now is meaningful for you too. Is it meaningful?”
“Incredibly so.”

There’s just too much.
Really, truly too much.
Enough to make me wonder if I should stay here.
Even though I know, both logically and emotionally, that I need to leave this place.
Even though I miss my mother so desperately.
It’s become difficult to leave.

“Yun Chung.”
“Yeah?”
“Do you ever think about when we’ll leave?”

The moment I heard those words.
My heart sank with a heavy thud.

“Why would you say that?”
“Just… I think we all felt the same way while making this color film.”
“Why?”
“You always seem like someone trying to leave us, Yun Chung. I know it’s an absurd thought. I really do know that no one is more sincere to us than you are. But sometimes I can’t help thinking it.”

I couldn’t answer.

“When I’m struggling, I run to you and whine… but you come out here alone in the early morning every day, just watching videos of us. Alone. Every single day.”

That’s what I’ve been doing for the past few months.

“Did everyone know?”
“Yeah.”
“Then why did you pretend not to?”
“It’s strange, isn’t it? You come out here alone just to watch our stage footage, our concept films, our music video—nothing else. So we all just pretended not to notice.”

I see.
I stroked Yeon Ju-hong’s head gently.
How confused they must have been… and how frightened.
Because their leader was acting strange.

“I’m sorry. I won’t do it anymore.”
“No, that means watching these videos is comforting for you, right?”
“That’s right.”

Was that it?
Without realizing it, had I been doing this as a form of comfort for myself?
Under the guise of monitoring, had I been doing this without even knowing?
I laughed, a hollow sound escaping my lips.

“I hope you keep watching then. I’d like Yun Chung to find comfort in it.”
“You’ve been a great source of solace for me too.”
“But it still feels like something’s missing….”

Yeon Ju-hong exhaled deeply.

“We need to fulfill our contract period and renew it too, Yun Chung. You understand, right?”
“Yeah. I know.”
“We should do a dinner show together when we’re old and gray, with the EVEL members.”
“We should.”
“That’s a promise.”
“Yeah, a promise.”
“Mm…. A promise….”

Only then did Yeon Ju-hong lean against my shoulder and fall asleep.
I remained seated, continuing to watch the members’ videos.
The weight of that promise was far too heavy.
I felt as though I could never rise again.

Personal Special Abilities:
Celebrity (87/100)
Fan Service (82/100)
(New!) Visual Directing (71/100)
[Your member has awakened a new ability.]
[Why not nurture this newly discovered talent?]

Even the notification window, which only made my heart heavier, gripped me firmly by the toes.

***

“You have a personal request for me?”

The next morning.
I was jogging with Baek Ju-ha.
During our morning run.
I was about to ask her for something incredibly difficult.

“Yes. It’s a personal favor… so it’s okay if you don’t want to help.”
“Why wouldn’t I help? Of course I will. As long as it’s nothing strange.”
“Well, it is kind of strange.”

At my words, Baek Ju-ha’s expression twisted in an odd way.

“Don’t tell me you’re asking me to do something immoral…?”
“…No, it’s not that.”

This woman’s imagination runs wild in the most unnecessary directions.

“I was hoping you could look into someone for me.”
“Someone?”

A small sound escaped me.
My voice wavered slightly.

“Her name is similar to yours. Baek Nok-ha…”
“….”

Baek Ju-ha’s expression grew increasingly rigid.

“She’s the same age as me. I don’t know if she’s alive or dead. If she were alive, she probably would have tried to pursue a career in entertainment. And… I’m not certain about this, but she might have lived in District 00.”

I recited all the information I had about the twenty-one-year-old Baek Nok-ha from my world.
Since I wasn’t sure whether Baek Nok-ha in this world had lived the same life, all of it was inaccurate information… but still.
It was worth a try.

“Alright. I’ll look into it.”
“Thank you.”
“But Yun Chung.”
“Yes.”

Baek Ju-ha asked me with a tense expression.

“Why are you asking me to look into that person?”

Why, she asked.
Why….

“It’s just….”

I hesitated for a moment before answering.

“Just because. She was a friend I was close to once. I wanted to see her.”

I wanted to find some thread—any thread at all—that might let me remain a little longer in this world.
I swallowed the reason I couldn’t bring myself to speak aloud.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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