A Blank Slate Regression for the Idol That Lost His Original Mindset - Chapter 245

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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A Regression Guide for Idols Who Lost Their Initial Intentions Episode 245

“No?”

I reflexively denied it first.

[Words that incite discord among members have been detected.]

[Initial Intentions -1]

What’s this? Inciting discord with just two letters? Did I somehow go back to the past?

But Ryu Jaehee’s face visible to my eyes adjusted to the darkness had lost all the round features from our debut days when initial intentions deductions for inciting discord popped up like daily meals, making it seem unlikely.

Ryu Jaehee, who had been sitting in his chair, shot up and turned on the kitchen lights. His hardened expression was much clearer under the bright light.

“Hajun Hyung thinks waiting until you speak up yourself is the top priority, but I don’t think that way.”

Ryu Jaehee pulled his dining chair back and sat down, crossing his arms firmly.

“From what I see, you and Hajun Hyung say you rely on each other, but you don’t really open up about the most important things to each other.”

Since Ryu Jaehee’s words weren’t wrong, I didn’t bother arguing back and kept my mouth shut.

If we had really opened up honestly about each other’s weakest parts, I would have known about the debt and guilt Gyeon Hajun carried toward me long ago.

And Gyeon Hajun would know the cause of my fear that he might cut ties with me again.

That’s why our relationship improvement can never reach 100%, Jun. Because you’ll never know that cause for the rest of your life.

Despite the atmosphere he’d built up like an interrogating detective, the tone of questions flowing from Ryu Jaehee’s mouth was closer to whining than interrogation.

“Why are you trying to hide it? Do you not trust us that much?”

Right, when I opened up in front of Jiwon Hyung, my mouth opened so easily, so why won’t it open now?

Even I don’t understand my own heart right now.

Is it because of pride that I don’t want the members to see my incompetent side, or because I don’t want to share my burden with the members?

“It’s a problem I need to solve, so don’t worry about it.”

I replied while lightly shaking the sleeping pill bottle. The rattling sound echoed through the quiet kitchen.

“Hyung, even though we jokingly call you patriarch, a leader isn’t a breadwinner.”

What, dude? Then what have I been doing all this time? Making songs until my body breaks, hugging it out with someone I’d cut ties with and even bringing Korean beef sets, huh?

However, saying this out loud would seem like showing off and wouldn’t save face, so I swallowed it.

“This isn’t the IMF era, and you don’t need to carry everything alone and struggle to feed us. We all earn our own keep too.”

As if reading my mind, Ryu Jaehee sighed deeply and scolded me.

“If you think of us as one team, think of it as sharing role burdens with team members, and if you think of us as family, think of it as family members relying on each other.”

Since I didn’t like being comforted by the youngest, I threw out some confrontational words.

“This is funny. Do you rely on your younger siblings?”

“The hyungs taught me. How to rely on family.”

Ryu Jaehee laughed cheerfully and pointed at me, countering with words I could never deny.

I couldn’t help but laugh. It was my defeat.

Still, even though I lost, I didn’t feel bad about it.

“Let’s sleep first and talk tomorrow.”

As I spoke while opening the sleeping pill cap, Ryu Jaehee urgently stopped me by pressing down the bottle cap.

“You’re obviously going to swallow it and throw up again, so why are you taking it?”

“No, I think I could chew it?”

“This hyung is talking crazy! Why would you chew that? Since when do pills come out to be chewed!”

A tense struggle ensued between the one trying to snatch the sleeping pill bottle and the one trying not to let it be snatched. Of course, the winner was obviously predetermined.

“Let me sleep, just let me sleep!”

As I shouted and completely rescued the sleeping pill bottle from Ryu Jaehee’s hands, my room door swung wide open.

“See, Ryu Jae. I told you I’d fail. That level of wind-style jutsu talk can’t possibly reform the final boss.”

Kim Dobin shuffled out with a grave expression, shaking his head.

“Why is that guy making a fuss instead of sleeping until now?”

“Doby Hyung has always been like that.”

“That’s true.”

With a bang, Gyeon Hajun’s private room door also opened, and Gyeon Hajun came out with a deeply frowning face, half-closing his eyes.

“Right, I don’t know who it was, but well said. Let’s sleep.”

Right. There’s no way someone with such sharp hearing wouldn’t wake up from this commotion.

His sensitive expression, which openly showed he’d just woken up, turned serious the moment he saw the sleeping pill bottle in my hand.

“No, cancel that. Let’s talk.”

Perhaps hesitation showed on my face, as Gyeon Hajun rubbed his forehead and waved his hand.

“If you don’t want to talk right now, we can take some time and-“

“Aaaah! How long are we going to postpone this! At this rate, Eden Hyung is going to collapse! Let’s just set today as the day! It’s good that everyone’s awake! Let’s have a conversation even if we have to borrow the power of dawn emotions!”

Perhaps extremely frustrated, Ryu Jaehee interrupted Gyeon Hajun and shouted.

“No, youngest. Eden Hyung would self-admit to the hospital before collapsing.”

Kim Dobin was correcting Ryu Jaehee’s words in the midst of all this. Since it wasn’t wrong, I couldn’t give him a headlock.

Under the gaze of three pairs of eyes directed at me, I closed the opened sleeping pill cap, placed it on the dining table, and nodded.

“Alright, let’s talk.”

If I keep being stubborn here, it’ll only worsen the team atmosphere as they worry about me. Whether those guys help with overcoming my slump or not, I should at least tell them.

Since I don’t want us, who’ve come this far, to return to the pre-regression atmosphere either.

Despite the midnight commotion, Seo Yehyeon continued sleeping soundly. Since it felt awkward to have such a serious conversation without Seo Yehyeon, I told Kim Dobin to wake him up, and the result was…

“Wow, Yehyeon Hyung really won’t wake up even if you carry him. Amazing.”

“Is this even human…?”

Kim Dobin, who dragged me along saying no matter how much he shook him he wouldn’t wake up, brought Seo Yehyeon to the living room on my back.

I dumped Seo Yehyeon, who was still fast asleep with no signs of waking up, onto the sofa and sat leaning against it.

I rested my arm on one raised knee and opened my mouth with a heavy voice.

“I’m in a slump.”

What made these six letters so hard to say? It didn’t feel refreshing or lighter, but it wasn’t as embarrassing as I thought either.

“I thought I found the cause, but that wasn’t really a solution.”

But continuing to voice facts I wanted to keep avoiding was quite difficult.

I bit my lips several times, looked at the ceiling once, and took several breaths before finally getting it out.

“If this state continues, I might not be able to compose anymore.”

Gyeon Hajun and Ryu Jaehee showed no change in expression even at those words.

But since Gyeon Hajun and Ryu Jaehee are good at managing their expressions, to know their real honest feelings, Kim Dobin, who can’t manage his expressions at all when not in front of cameras, was perfect.

The moment I turned to look at Kim Dobin, I met a surprisingly peaceful expression.

Facing Kim Dobin’s face like that made all the worrying I’d done until now feel truly trivial.

Kim Dobin even threw me the words “That could happen” with that terribly peaceful face. This wasn’t something possible with just Kim Dobin’s acting skills and courage alone.

“Hey, aren’t you surprised? Isn’t it shocking? Don’t you feel like the world is collapsing?”

When I grabbed Kim Dobin’s shoulders and shook him while asking, Kim Dobin scratched the back of his head and nodded.

“Maybe because I’ve experienced it once, the shock is less…”

This guy, did he dream it? Kim Dobin was talking nonsense, but the members’ reactions were quite a fresh shock.

“So, me not being able to compose isn’t a disaster-level event like lightning striking from a clear sky?”

Then why have I been suffering alone, rotting inside all this time? Still, I liked that there were no pitying, sympathetic looks directed at me.

“Just because you can’t compose doesn’t mean your rap skills regress too. If you can’t do it, we can buy songs. Just absolutely don’t leave it to the CEO.”

“Right, Hyung has the title of leader and the position of main rapper even without producing. Songs have other routes besides your producing.”

The youngest line took turns listing my roles in Rev excluding producing.

“You overcoming the slump is the best and optimal, but even if you can’t overcome it, there’s no big problem for our group. So don’t feel burdened and try again slowly.”

Gyeon Hajun’s delicate patting touched my back. It was a distinctly different touch from the crew hyungs who pound mercilessly like drums.

It was a moment of confirmation that in this life, I still have support pillars remaining besides music.

The blue air of dawn gradually began to shine through the veranda window. Phone alarms rang loudly from Seo Yehyeon and Ryu Jaehee’s rooms.

At the same time, Seo Yehyeon’s eyes snapped open. He seemed quite bewildered that he’d opened his eyes on the living room sofa.

“What are you all doing here?”

Seo Yehyeon, who got up rubbing his eyes, blinked and asked upon discovering us gathered in the living room. When I briefly explained the dawn commotion, Seo Yehyeon nodded.

“I thought I heard noisy sounds in my sleep.”

“Still didn’t get up? Amazing, truly amazing.”

I clapped my hands and let out a sincere exclamation of admiration. Seo Yehyeon, who had listened to my slump situation with his chin propped up and an indifferent expression, opened his mouth.

“You’d probably miss my nagging in the recording studio, but if you’re having a hard time, what can we do.”

From Seo Yehyeon’s nonchalant consolation, one particular word stuck in my ears.

“Miss?”

“No, wait! No, it’s not that I miss it! Ugh! That’s not what I meant!”

“I see. You missed it.”

Seo Yehyeon covered his mouth with a face that showed he had misspoken, but I only heard what I wanted to hear.

“If hyung misses me, then I guess I have no choice but to overcome this.”

I grinned and got up, grabbing my outer clothing from the room before coming out.

“Where are you going?”

“The studio. Yehyeon hyung said he misses my nagging.”

I paused while putting on my shoes carelessly at the entrance and asked the members.

“Want to come with me?”

Being noisy together would be better than being holed up alone, I guess.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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