Your Majesty, Dinner Is Ready. - Chapter 130

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Episode 130: I Have a Friend Now
We successfully subdued ten outlaws from the Hyena Guild.
Our Exploration Expedition suffered zero casualties.
Meanwhile, all ten members of the Hyena Guild except Pierre fell unconscious.
It was a decisive victory earned through tactics alone.
“Remarkable.”
Pierre spoke calmly while watching Rosalia inject paralytic poison into each of the fallen outlaws one by one.
“Thanks to you, I got to see something entertaining. Quite the show, really.”
Throughout the entire battle, Pierre didn’t step forward once—he hung back at a distance and simply watched.
If I’d been his enemy, his high Perception stat might have granted him the subtle detection ability to neutralize my stratagems.
“A bit of a shame, though.”
“A bit regrettable, I must say.”
Had he been harboring the same thought?
Pierre let out a dry chuckle, having uttered nearly identical words at almost the exact same moment I did.
“If I’d known you possessed such intriguing tactics, I might’ve slipped into the pillaging myself. And if I’d become today’s sacrifice in the process, I wouldn’t have regretted it.”
“I was secretly wishing Pierre had joined the fight—it would’ve made victory much harder.”
Abel, who’d been preparing dinner, froze mid-motion.
“What’s wrong, Abel?”
“It’s just that… after Bartimir, he also seems to think very much like our patron, somehow.”
I nodded and turned my gaze toward Pierre.
“Would you consider becoming my son?”
“I’ll have to decline. That way, if we meet as outlaw and adventurer in the future, I won’t become the scoundrel who killed his own father.”
“Now that you mention it, that makes sense. I understand. I’ve no desire to become a terrible parent who kills his own son either.”
It was probably best to reserve that parent-child feeling exclusively for Bartimir, the youngest.
……
Rosalia, who’d been arranging the outlaws, suddenly looked between Pierre and me before shaking her head slightly.
“Then would you consider being friends instead?”
“Even sworn enemies can be friends. That works fine.”
“Hurrah.”
Now I could say it with confidence in front of Merlin.
I have a friend!
“I’d thought the entire Exploration Expedition would be waiting to receive us, but I never imagined only three of you would be here.”
My friend Pierre gazed blankly at the ceiling before speaking.
“And since the tiger-eared boy didn’t even fight, it was practically two of you.”
“There was no real reason for him to get involved.”
Before we began the battle, I’d hidden Abel’s body.
Using the Secret Art of Illusion that Okail had granted me—projecting a ‘space without Abel’ as an overlay.
Of course it consumed an enormous amount of mental energy, but thanks to the Tearful Mint I’d consumed beforehand, I barely managed to avoid confronting a complete mental disorder syndrome.
“If I’d participated in the fight, my first move would’ve been to hurl my axe at where that boy stood. It’s the law of beasts to tear into the weakest prey first.”
……
Abel’s body flinched again.
His tail had been drooping since earlier.
“Don’t scare the kid like that.”
“He’s not a kid—he’s an adventurer. Don’t overprotect him like this. If he’s entered the Dungeon, he should be prepared to die, shouldn’t he?”
“That’s not wrong, but I’m his guardian.”
“Ah, then overprotection is justified. I concede.”
Pierre nodded obediently.
But I’d already driven a wedge into my previous decision.
‘I made the right call not recruiting him into the Expedition.’
Apart from youngest Bartimir, the other Le children were injured fingers too brutal and violent to be given affection.
To the point where even Emir, the owner of the Explosive Body trait who’d stupidly died after causing damage to others, was the most virtuous among them.
“Say, friend—the Secret Art that drove our guild members to tears was that assassin’s Illusory Throwing Star, wasn’t it?”
“That’s correct.”
Illusory Throwing Star.
An assassin-class Secret Art that dredges up traumatic memories from the past.
It was especially effective against outlaws who’d grown up twisted by dark histories.
“My suspicion was roughly right then. But what caused the darkness around us…?”
Pierre glanced at my right hand.
“Was it the power of the Orb of Lumeran?”
“Roughly so.”
A sacred artifact: the Orb of Lumeran.
Its effect was the dominion over light and darkness within a specific region.
In simpler terms, it was a sacred artifact that allowed me to summon light and shadow according to my will.
No wonder the vampires and ghouls had coveted it so desperately.
“So the hidden reward was that sacred artifact, then…!”
Greed glimmered openly in Pierre’s brown eyes.
I discreetly slipped my right hand behind my back.
“Please don’t covet it. Unless you’re a priest of Solmiran, you cannot remove it from my body arbitrarily.”
In theory, a priest of Selvaran, the god of the moon, might also be capable, but their sect was confined to the Eastern Continent, making them nearly impossible to encounter in the West.
“Well, thank you for the earnest answer, in any case.”
Pierre regarded me with evident satisfaction.
“We are an ‘alliance,’ after all, and we need to know each other better. Don’t you agree?”
“Indeed. And if we understand each other well, we might fight all the more fiercely when we eventually meet as enemies in the Dungeon.”
The end of a Copy Alliance is always the death of one side.
It was a fated future that struck me anew today.
“The meal is ready, Odillon.”
As we continued our quiet conversation, Abel’s cooking was finally prepared in full.
“Shall we eat first?”
“Let’s.”
Our Exploration Expedition, along with Pierre as our unexpected guest, savored the meal Abel had prepared.
Yet the team members were so wary of Pierre that they couldn’t eat comfortably.
……
“…Odillon, may I move a little closer?”
Rosalia glowered at Pierre throughout the meal, while Abel huddled trembling against my side.
It seemed we wouldn’t be dining together with Pierre anytime soon.
Still, the food was so delicious that I ate no fewer than four bowls.
“You’re going to make me fat, Abel.”
“Is that so…”
With my belly full and satisfied, it was now time to fulfill my duties as a Socialite.
“Jinsil.”
I approached the Outlaws that Rosalia had laid out and spoke.
“Examine all of them and sort them by which Evil God would be pleased to receive them, and whether any are unsuitable.”
《Leave it to me. :D》
Jinsil promptly completed the task.
Based on the analysis, I selected the Outlaw brimming with the deepest malice and cunning.
It was a rat humanoid of the Tracker Class—the kind whose veins ran with treachery rather than blood.
“You’re going to do this now?”
Abel, having tidied away the cookware and dishes, approached smoothly.
“Which Evil God shall you offer it to?”
“Well…”
I pretended to deliberate, though I had already decided long beforehand.
“Ridni, I hope you’re looking forward to this.”
《:)》
《The wise one pretends otherwise, yet trembles with anticipation!》
“Please don’t feel too slighted, the rest of you. Once this expedition is over, I promise to offer a full-strength Offering to each of you in turn.”
With Odillon’s resources to procure anything money could buy, I planned to make abundant Offerings to the other Evil Gods as well.
“Abel, shall we begin?”
First, I summoned a full-moon-shaped altar using the Full Moon Reaper.
After setting up the candles, I examined the rat humanoid who would be today’s Offering.
“I’ve never seen a Socialite perform a live sacrificial Offering before.”
Pierre watched intently, tail swishing.
This was my first Offering ritual with an audience present.
As a model Socialite, I decided to showcase some showmanship and professionalism.
Shnick.
First step: remove the head.
With a sharp Full Moon Reaper, I severed the rat humanoid’s thick neck in an exaggerated, elegant flourish.
“I present the head as a gift.”
Thump-thump.
The Outlaw’s head rolled toward Pierre.
“Much obliged.”
Pierre accepted the head of his former rat-kin companion with a satisfied smile.
“What ingredients shall we add to the offering this time?”
Abel, clutching the Offering Recipe Notebook, asked seriously.
“Didn’t the Sage of Twisted Truth say he absolutely prefers offerings that are fresh and unique?”
“Indeed.”
Even recipes that had pleased him before could not be reused.
Once tasted, they became—by the standard of our wise benefactor—merely stale flavors.
“I think I’ll use this one this time.”
He drew out a heap of medicinal herbs from the subspace.
Tearful Mint.
“…The scent of that herb might be something the Evil God would dislike, sir.”
“Abel, are you seriously telling me our Lord Ridni is a picky eater who turns his nose up at offerings?”
“No, sir…”
“Think of an appropriate cooking method.”
Abel quickly recalled a recipe.
Pleased, he ruffled Abel’s hair vigorously and called out to Rosalia.
“Sister, may I borrow Silsil for a moment?”
……
Rosalia produced a white pseudo-slime from the shadows.
It was Silsil, a Toxic Follower crafted from the Gourmet’s Thread and combined with various paralytic toxins.
“Come here—would you detach pieces of yourself for me?”
—Squeak-squeak!?
“Oh, don’t be like that. Just a little.”
—Squeak!
Silsil bounced enthusiastically and began dividing itself bit by bit.
He collected about ten pieces and stroked what resembled the creature’s head with his index finger.
“Mm, my finger is gradually going numb.”
—Squeak!
“Thank you. That’s a novel sensation.”
Next, he scattered Tearful Mint generously across the outlaw’s corpse laid upon the altar.
This dish’s concept was a salad.
He added pieces of Silsil’s body as though it were ricotta cheese.
“Finally…”
For an offering presented to Ridni, blood was an indispensable sauce.
This time, wanting to impart a tangy taste, he opted for an unconventional method.
“Sister, please poison me.”
……
Rosalia sprayed the Red Death Rose Extreme Toxin—her Fresh Companion—directly into his mouth.
Sizzle!
When the burning sensation coursing through his entire body reached its peak, he spilled his blood across the offering.
That should give it a sufficiently tangy flavor.
《Absurd though it may be, since it’s novel, the wise one is quite pleased!》
All preparations were now complete.
A special offering recipe.
Tearful Mint rat-kin salad.
“Ridni.”
He whispered softly, his hand hovering above the offering’s form.
“Your meal is ready.”
—Caw!
It was mealtime for the wise one.
Munch, munch!
The blind raven, as always, devoured the offering voraciously.
【…Yes! This is it! My child!】
Soon, Ridni let out a cry of joy.
【My mouth’s burning a bit, but that’s fine. This delights me!】
“Is that so?”
【…You wretch! Are you saying I would lie?】
“Of course not, my lord. I merely sought confirmation. To understand your refined tastes more precisely.”
The Sage of Twisted Truth, who had awakened to all knowledge in the world, would hardly react strongly to the preferences and aversions of specific ingredients.
That would be far too petty for a divine being.
“If you find it to your liking, I shall add similar herbs—subtly different in character—to future offerings.”
【…Very well. Now tell me which Secret Art you desire.】
I spoke the name of the Secret Art I wished for, and Ridni granted my request at once, without hesitation.
Hiss.
A small burning pain crossed my right middle finger as an eye-shaped tattoo was etched into my skin.
“The ritual is complete?”
The moment the presence of the Wise One faded, Pierre opened his mouth.
“Yes, just now.”
“But what do you intend to do with those nine still lying about?”
Pierre pointed his thumb at the nine Outlaws sprawled unconscious and paralyzed before us.
“You have a means of… transporting so many people?”
“Of course.”
I gazed with quiet satisfaction at the spare offerings before me—reassuring simply to behold—and raised my left hand.
“I shall resolve it through ‘Faith Practice’ for the Solitary One.”
One form of Faith Practice dedicated to the Watcher of Lonely Silence.
Corpse Making.
“Leria, I shall transform nine lives into the quiet land of death.”

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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