Your Majesty, Dinner Is Ready. - Chapter 1

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Episode 1: You Know Everything
[A guide to the Heretic of Twisted Truth written by someone who has sunk 20,000 hours into the game as a Heretic and is frustrated enough to share]
– Written by: Ridni’s Foot Wiper
[The pioneer of the Heretic of Twisted Truth.
A malevolent god of esoteric knowledge and sinister sorcery.
A cunning sorcerer who plucked out both his own eyes as an offering, devoured the World Tree, and seized infinite wisdom in his grasp.
Ridni knows everything.
But you all seem to know nothing, so I’ve written up this guide to the Heretic of Twisted Truth.
If you want to argue, you’re wrong—just empty your head and follow along.
1. Why You Must Worship Ridni
The Heretic of Twisted Truth starts with the Eye of Truth Piercing, which is basically a catch-all ability that helps tremendously with early survival.
Plus, with skills branching into eighteen different types, the class boasts unparalleled versatility among all Heretics.
2. Race
Human or Goblin aren’t bad, but personally I’d strongly recommend a Half-Elf Heretic.
If an Elf serves an evil god, the angered nature deity will curse them terribly—what’s the problem with that?
As I already said before: if you’re thinking about raising a counterargument, it means I’m right and you’re wrong.
I’ll explain why I recommend Half-Elf in detail later in the Secrets and Build sections, so stop complaining and just read it carefully.
3. Traits
Pick only and exactly True Believer and Rusted Spirit—nothing more, nothing less.
The reason is….]
I paused mid-sentence, stopping my hands as I sank into thought.
I was conflicted.
How could I convey all the valuable information without making it boring?
‘If you combine the traits True Believer and Rusted Spirit, you can serve other evil gods without limit too?’
No, that’s too vague.
For people to understand properly, I’d need to explain in detail, but then it would get too long.
These days, half the readers will just hit back if there’s no three-line summary, so I had to keep it as short as possible.
‘This is giving me a headache….’
Why had I gotten so obsessed with a class that was both difficult and weak that I was writing strategy guides like this?
The real injustice was that balance patches happened every few months consistently, yet the Heretic—the worst class by far—only ever received nerfs.
Something about it being unavoidable due to the lore?
[* Oh no! The evil gods were shunned by the people again this month! With no faith, they couldn’t grow any stronger! We’re sorry, Heretics! ]
North American developers had a habit of writing cheerfully phrased patch notes like that.
Even if the Heretic was canonically weak, how could they never give it a single buff?
I kept grumbling as I wrote diligently.
‘It’s already dawn.’
I’d pulled an all-nighter without realizing it, too focused on writing.
I stood up from my desk for a moment, stretching my fingers that ached from working non-stop.
My eyes were starting to droop—maybe I should grab some caffeine.
‘Huh?’
As I took a 1+1 coffee I’d bought at the mart yesterday from the refrigerator and was opening it, I suddenly squinted at the screen.
Text I hadn’t written appeared on the document.
[Seeker, you who walk the path toward Twisted Truth.]
A sentence written in an odd, scrawled font.
As I hesitated, wondering what was happening, more text began appearing automatically—my hands weren’t even touching the keyboard.
[The wise one has taken notice of your earnest devotion.]
The moment those words registered in my eyes.
Suddenly my vision began to blur.
[Ridni watches over you. Learn new knowledge and ceaselessly pursue truth. Spread the renown of the one who has glimpsed Twisted Truth throughout this world!]
My eyelids grew heavy, and my vision turned white.
‘…What is this?’
I couldn’t fight the encroaching drowsiness and staggered before collapsing right where I stood.
Through my fading consciousness, the last sentence being typed on the screen caught my eye.
Oddly, it was written in clean, clear font—unlike everything before.
[May your footsteps bear fruit in safety….]
***
“Why are you serving an evil god?”
To the blunt question posed by a grimy-looking boy, I found myself unable to answer immediately.
It wasn’t that an appropriate response didn’t come to mind.
Given time, I could explain at length for half a day why one must worship a temperamental and finicky evil god instead of a kindhearted good one.
The culprit clamped shut a mouth that wanted to cry out at any moment, but what held their attention was the bizarre, elegant script floating before their eyes—written in black ink.
《A poor pickpocket from the Slums, Abel (tiger-human, age 12). Scraping by alongside his older sister Marlin—a shameless brat with no sense of decorum. Eliminating him seems the wiser course.》
“…….”
A simple profile and criminal record hovered in the empty air, written in that same script.
An utterly surreal sight, yet oddly not difficult to accept.
Certainly easier to process than this bewildering reality itself—waking after losing consciousness only to find myself in an entirely foreign world.
I turned my head briefly, surveying my surroundings.
Each time a new landscape, person, or object entered my field of view, information in that same script floated lazily up to greet me.
《A forest with a suspicious atmosphere. Abnormally thick branches and dense foliage completely block out the sky, creating a dim and murky ambiance.》
The same happened when I gazed at the forest encircling us.
《Bans, a swordsman of the Cheonhwa Mercenary Company (human, age 39). A man of serious drinking habits—guzzles beer the moment he wakes. A complete idiot!》
Even when my eyes fell on a thoroughly drunk mercenary.
《A house burglar from the Slums, Marlin (tiger-human, age 14). Abel’s older sister. Already possessing exceptional thieving skills at her tender age—a future master thief in the making.》
The information continued to appear—useless scraps that nonetheless manifested when my gaze met the wide-eyed girl who came rushing over to shield her younger brother behind her back.
All of it superfluous, yet these fragments were indirectly helping me piece together the situation.
“Don’t ignore me and give me an answer. Why do you believe in some twisted god? Stupid.”
“Abel, stop it.”
The girl who’d sealed her brother’s mouth began backing away incrementally.
Whether she’d interpreted my deliberate silence and focused gaze as signs of adaptation to this surreal predicament, her eyes remained boldly open even as her hands trembled violently.
“Calm yourself, human.”
At that moment, an orc with crimson skin, spear slung across his shoulder, raised an arm to block my line of sight.
“I understand your displeasure at the insult to the god she serves, but let it go for now. There will be time for anger once this is done. Though we’ve only come together for coin, we’re members of the same expedition, are we not?”
A minor friction—a tiger-human boy who despises heretics and their creed.
An orc standing between them, mediating and setting the tone.
A familiar scene.
I could not possibly be mistaken.
I’d lived through this countless times before—so many repetitions it had grown tedious.
‘…This is a heretic Tutorial dungeon.’
Every circumstance, every piece of evidence pointed toward an absurd truth.
.
A game that had devoured every spare hour since my resignation with its uniquely subtle gameplay.
This world is the one I spent twenty thousand hours escaping into, trading my dopamine for digital refuge.
‘Is that right…?’
Though the most rational hypothesis, it still felt hollow and unbelievable.
Wouldn’t it be more plausible that I’d been surviving on nothing but coffee for days, gaming all night until these fever dreams overtook me?
And yet, if this guess were true, I couldn’t simply remain idle.
The reason blazed in massive letters across the high air above.
《E-rank Labyrinth – Lair of the Hidden Ghoul Pack》
《The Ghouls inhabiting this squalid hideout are extremely sensitive to the scent of the living. Beware especially their intoxication with the smell of blood.》
I had to run—now.
The moment my decision crystallized, a foul stench pierced the forest from beyond, drawing rapidly closer.
They were coming.
Newbie-slayers of the Heretic Tutorial. A cure for low blood pressure. The wall of lamentation in the low-level zones.
Monsters that earned countless accolades yet never lost their humility—forever humbly eviscerating players fresh from the introduction sequence.
“Intruders….”
A Ghoul.
An undead clad in bristling teeth, razor-sharp claws, and a visage grotesque beyond description emerged from between the trees.
《Hidden Ghoul (Level 3)》
《Currently, you are no match for this creature whatsoever. It is advised that you throw the others as bait and flee.》
Only two of them, but in the Tutorial they were virtually invincible.
The orc’s brow furrowed; the siblings’ faces tightened with tension as their eyes darted about. The mercenary, meanwhile, continued drowning in his drink.
“Already? The scholar from the Johwa Religion said something different.”
The orc gripped his spear with both hands and stepped forward with spirited confidence.
“But don’t worry. I, the great warrior Tunlak, will protect you all.”
His stride betrayed not a shred of fear—only bold assurance.
His muscular shoulders and broad back were reassuring to behold, and the siblings seemed to take some comfort from the sight.
…Ignorance is bliss.
I pivoted immediately, scanning the terrain for my bearings.
I had to hurry.
“For eternal struggle—!”
The orc bellowed with all his might and charged forward, thrusting his spear.
Even to my untrained eye, his stance was hopelessly clumsy.
The ghoul tilted his head slightly to the side, evading the spear point with ease, then extended his arm.
Crunch!
“Ugh, gaaahhh….”
Sharp claws pierced straight through the orc’s muscular chest and emerged from his back.
Without a Healing Skill, there was no surviving a wound like that.
The so-called great warrior trembled for a moment, then went limp.
‘Just as I thought.’
《Fledgling Warrior Tunlak (Crimson Orc, age 24). He looks like a seasoned warrior on the surface, but he’s never actually fought in battle. A complete fool who relied on his muscles and posturing—and paid for it with his life.》
There’s no help for it.
He can’t be saved. Not ever.
I’ve tried everything to bring him back—like some participant in Infinite Regression—but it’s essentially a forced event. There’s no way around it.
There was no point wasting time on a meaningless task. I needed to focus on survival, using this unfortunate orc’s death as a stepping stone.
“Ngh… what the—!”
The ghoul extended his claws toward the drunken mercenary as well.
He was more seasoned than Tunlak had been, so he’d buy us some time.
Strong enough in his way, but he was just a trap character planted by some twisted designer—the kind who’d only cause trouble if we dragged him along. Better to leave him behind.
“What are you doing?”
After confirming which direction we needed to go, I ran past the tiger-human siblings, frozen in shock, and spoke as I moved.
“Run. Now.”
The young siblings were nothing like the nameless extras in a horror film who panic and die pointlessly in a crisis.
They hesitated for just a moment, then began running after me.
Patter-patter-patter!
The urgent sound of feet striking the parched earth echoed through the forest.
“…Heretic!”
Marlin, the girl who had quickly caught up to me using her people’s superior physical abilities, called out anxiously.
“Where are we going? Can we survive if we run?”
It was a question I’d heard even in the game.
I recalled the dialogue options that would appear at moments like this.
[1. Shut your mouth.]
[2. If you don’t stay quiet, I’ll tear your mouth open.]
[3. Ignore her.]
…I didn’t want to be that kind of pathetic adult to a child.
I chose words that would reassure her as much as possible and answered gently.
“I’ll keep you safe. Just follow me, Marlin.”
“…!”
Marlin’s eyes went wide.
“How do you know my name?”
“Why ask the obvious?”
I exhaled heavily between strides and gave a slight smile.
“I know everything there is to know.”

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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