Youngest on Top - Chapter 102
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 102
‘…Could it be because I coughed up blood at Ilay’s place back then?’
Ah, I really pushed myself too hard then, but now I’m perfectly fine—.
“…!”
Demian’s hand grasped mine.
Since this was the first time he’d reached out to me on his own, my body went rigid.
“Don’t hold it in.”
His voice was resolute.
Watching him express his concern so clumsily, commanding it like an order, made me want to laugh a little.
“It’s fine.”
“It’s not fine.”
“Really, it’s okay….”
At most, I’d only borrowed a fraction of Enrik’s power—just the tiniest sliver.
Enrik: My nails don’t have dirt on them.
Enrik: But yes, compared to my power, it’s truly an ant’s eyelash worth.
Enrik: If I gave you more strength, you weakling would be crushed.
Right, so there’s absolutely no problem—.
“Cough!”
As my chest tickled, a cough burst out, and my eyes went wide.
Damn it.
I can’t even endure this much?
‘It’s not like I was exiled as a sunfish instead of a human!’
“Saelika!”
“Gasp….”
My breath kept catching in my throat.
My vision blurred and my strength drained away completely.
It seemed the euphoria from channeling the angel’s power had masked the pain temporarily.
Like a fanatic who feels no suffering at all.
Enrik: Saelika!
Enrik hadn’t anticipated this either.
‘Come to think of it, it’s fortunate that a newly awakened Sacred Maiden borrowing power ended up in this condition….’
In the first place, she wouldn’t have been able to borrow the power at all.
“Don’t hold it in… I told you not to.”
Demian’s voice, grinding out the words, trembled uncontrollably.
The hands catching my crumbling body were extraordinarily gentle.
“Gonzanim, he must have been a good older brother….”
Demian looked so grave that I laughed softly to reassure him.
“It’s… okay….”
I wanted to say more, but even moving my lips had become too difficult.
My vision began to fade to black.
The last thing I saw was Demian’s eyes, trembling like a lake of blue.
He had said I wouldn’t be hurt at all.
‘Liar.’
Soon I could see nothing, feel nothing.
Deep darkness consumed me.
Yet in that final moment, I felt arms wrapping around me.
An embrace that was refreshingly cool and yet profoundly warm all at once.
* * *
“It appears she exerted excessive power, compounded by the Sacred Fever. That is likely the cause.”
The physician who had examined Saelika reported to Admiral Ekellan.
“I regret to inform you, but neither the Temple Priest nor medicine can offer assistance. The Sacred Maiden must overcome this through her own strength alone.”
“Through her own strength?”
Admiral Ekellan’s gaze turned piercing.
“Are you truly saying such things to me, physician?”
“My apologies. However, Sacred Fever is inherently such a condition….”
The physician stammered, bowing his head in deference.
Admiral Ekellan opened his mouth to say more, then closed it.
The Admiral himself was well acquainted with the nature of Sacred Fever.
Tormenting the physician would change nothing.
It would merely be venting his frustration.
Yet his anger did not easily subside.
Each time the small child’s breathing quickened, fury surged from deep within his chest.
Fortunately, he had another target for his wrath.
The one responsible for this calamity.
Zaphrez.
Merely recalling it made his teeth clench.
“Leave.”
“Y-Yes, Admiral!”
The physician fled the room like an arrow released from a bow, fearing the Admiral’s resolve might change.
Admiral Ekellan’s gaze had already departed from him.
Saelika chattered excitedly, her spirits lifted.
Demian stood beside her.
“Demian.”
“…I am always late.”
…
“When I lost that child, and now as well.”
Admiral Ekellan didn’t know what to say and closed his mouth.
Demian gazed at Saelika with a sunken expression.
“You are not Gonzanim.”
“Gonzanim is a precious and cherished child.”
What must this child have been thinking when he spoke like that?
Her face was composed, her voice steady.
But.
“You are not a beloved, precious child.”
“You are an abandoned child.”
She must have been wounded.
I knew it.
I knew that speaking such words would hurt this small child.
Yet I could not bear to remain silent.
Because I despised this child nestled in Admiral Ekellan’s arms like family.
No, truthfully, because I found myself repulsive, abominable, and horrible—unforgivable.
So I could not endure it.
I redirected the arrow that should have been aimed at myself toward this child instead.
And yet this child.
“Sad children should eat sweet things!”
Though she herself was in the greatest pain, she always thought only of others.
As if her own suffering meant nothing at all.
“Stupid fool… idiot, imbecile.”
Demian clenched his teeth.
His eyes trembled uncontrollably as he stared at the child.
* * *
By coincidence, the day both the Duke of Noishurael and the Duchess were away.
The youngest daughter vanished.
The Ducal House was thrown into chaos by the youngest daughter’s disappearance.
The Ducal Palace, once filled with laughter, withered into a desolate, twisted emptiness.
A family crumbled in an instant.
‘It’s my fault.’
That’s what Demian believed.
In their absence, he should have watched over his sister more carefully.
If he had properly cared for her, this would never have happened.
‘Everything is because of me…’
The Duke of Noishurael was too devastated by losing his youngest daughter to truly see Demian’s pain.
He was never a warm or tender man to begin with.
He was like someone carved from the ice of the north.
With the Duchess absent, there was no one to care for Demian with tenderness.
Demian was the spitting image of his father—festering within while appearing flawless on the surface.
No one in the Ducal Palace recognized that the child was wounded through and through.
A cold, dark, and vast palace.
As guilt grew within those walls and consumed the child, Zaphrez appeared.
‘It’s all your fault.’
‘Everyone says it’s not, but they blame you.’
‘You went hunting that day? If you’d stayed by your sister’s side, this never would have happened.’
‘Why did you go hunting? For a scarf to gift your sister?’
‘What a cowardly excuse! You only went for your own amusement. Abandoning your sister.’
‘Because of you, our parents fell apart. Because of you, the entire Ducal House crumbled.’
Words whispered subtly into the child’s ears.
Dressed in different garb, but their meaning was no different.
Demian found it easier that way.
Hating himself so much, unable to forgive himself.
He would have preferred if someone else blamed him instead.
‘You lost your sister because you were weak.’
‘If you’d been strong, you would have noticed the calamity befalling your sister, wouldn’t you?’
‘Your sister is so pitiful. If her brother had been strong, she’d be living a comfortable and peaceful life as the Ducal Daughter by now.’
‘Now we don’t even know if she’s alive or dead.’
Because I wasn’t strong enough.
Because I was weak.
With such thoughts, Demian grasped the Demon Sword for greater power.
His mind grew increasingly clouded, as if shrouded in fog.
Yet his senses became painfully acute.
He could neither think clearly nor perceive properly.
Thus the child gradually lost what was essential to being human.
The child could not sleep.
After days of sleepless nights, he would finally collapse into slumber, only for nightmares to begin.
Terrible dreams they were.
In those dreams, his youngest sister died again and again, countless times.
While resenting him.
Brother, why did you lose me?
Why did you leave me behind and go hunting that day?
Why couldn’t you find me?
I kept waiting for you.
Why did you let me die?
Among countless words, there was one that hurt the most.
Brother… I hurt so much…
It aches. I’m scared. I’m lonely. I’m so alone. It hurts, hurts, hurts!
Each time the child cried out in pain and died, it felt as though my heart was being torn apart.
This was merely a nightmare shown by the Demon Sword.
Not reality.
The child was alive.
I repeated this to myself, yet fear consumed me.
What if it were true?
What if something similar had happened to that small child?
What if the child had died resenting me?
I despised myself so much I could barely endure it.
“But Gonzanim is precious too.”
So when I heard those words.
“Gonzanim is a precious child too. To mother and father.”
When that tender, clear voice touched my heart.
“Gonzanim, you must have been such a good brother…”
Collapsed and unable to even hold my body upright.
With a face drained of all color, forcing a smile—who was I even comforting?
Demian gripped the child’s hand tightly.
“Demian.”
Admiral Ekellan called to him quietly.
“The day you first met Saelika, you asked me if I was overlapping her image with that child.”
“….”
“The truth is, you’re the one doing the overlapping.”
Because he was overlapping their images, those words had spilled out in the first place.
“See Saelika as just Saelika.”
“….”
“And see yourself for who you truly are.”
Demian said nothing.
Admiral Ekellan gazed at the back of his head with a sorrowful expression, then spoke in a low voice.
“You are… a precious nephew to me.”
When he said such things, Demian would be wounded even more deeply.
So many times he had swallowed the words in silence, unable to speak them aloud.
“…It’s not your fault.”
Flames ignited in Demian’s eyes.
“Do you truly believe it’s not my fault, sir?”
“I do.”
“It is my fault. All of it—that child disappeared, and everyone’s suffering because of it, it’s all because of me!”
“How is that your fault? You were just a child who knew nothing back then! A child who went hunting because you wanted to make a fur scarf for your sister before winter came!”
“It’s the same now.”
Demian’s gaze turned toward Saelika.
“I’m the one who made this child suffer like this.”
“It was Zaphrez’s doing, not yours.”
“But I’m the one who drove that child to use excessive power.”
Demian’s resolve was unwavering.
“If I hadn’t hurt this child, if I had trusted his words more…”
“….”
“Then this child wouldn’t have needed to exert such excessive power.”
Admiral Ekellan gazed quietly at Demian.
“Then apologize.”
“….”
“Tell this child you’re sorry when he wakes up.”
“….”
“And treat him well.”
It would be good for you too.
The Admiral swallowed the rest of his words.
In truth, Demian wanted to treat this child better than anyone else.
He was simply restraining himself as if punishing himself.
Just as he had neglected to care for himself until now.
Demian lifted his head and gazed at Saelika’s sleeping face.
His gaze was unusually profound.
* * *
‘Ugh, the aftereffects are seriously no joke.’
My entire body creaked.
I wanted to sleep more, but I needed to regain consciousness.
Enrik: Are you okay?
‘Yeah…. I don’t think I’ll die.’
Enrik: I didn’t know it would be this hard on you.
Enrik: I should have thought more carefully.
It was an unexpected response.
I thought he’d tease me for being so weak that I couldn’t even handle this much.
Surprisingly, Enrik seemed a bit dejected.
Enrik: “…How have you been seeing me all this time?”
‘As I see you now, of course.’
I understood why Enrik thought it would be fine.
Since we were born from the same source, he must have believed it would be easier to distribute his power accordingly.
Besides, my sacred power is of a higher grade.
‘That’s why I thought there would be no burden either.’
I slowly lifted my heavy eyelids.
As I blinked several times to clear my blurred vision, an unfamiliar ceiling came into view.
It was the ceiling of the hotel where Admiral Ekellan was staying.
‘How much time has passed?’
I had left after telling Gerald I would visit the White Pearl Eastern District briefly.
If much time has passed and I don’t return, the Temple will worry.
Then they will search for my whereabouts, and if they discover that I’ve collapsed…
‘There might be problems between Admiral Ekellan and Demian.’
Normally, one would incur debts to two great noble houses and grow closer to them.
But our Temple people are a bit unusual.
‘Still, since they haven’t found me here yet, it doesn’t seem like much time has passed.’
I tried to sit up but stopped short.
Someone was staring at me intently.
It was Demian.
“…”
“…”
An awkward silence fell between us as we faced each other.
Why is Demian here?
I thought he would have left right away.
By Demian’s side sat a bowl of water and a damp cloth.
Could it be that he had been nursing me this whole time?
The Duke of Noishurael himself, personally?
‘Could it really be…?’
Feeling increasingly awkward, I fidgeted with my hands before offering a greeting.
“…Hi there.”
My voice came out hoarse and sounded a bit strange.
Demian didn’t respond.
He simply kept his mouth shut, staring at me with an intense gaze.
How much time had passed?
Finally, his lips parted.
“Saelika.”
“Yes?”
I answered, then belatedly realized something.
This was the first time Demian had called me by my name.
He’d always referred to me as “that one,” “that child,” “someone like you”—things like that.
“…I’m sorry.”
I looked up at Demian in surprise.
Sorry? Him?
Those were words I never imagined would come from Demian’s mouth.
‘But why would he apologize?’
There wasn’t really anything Demian needed to apologize to me for, was there?
Even thinking it over again, there was nothing he owed me an apology for.
Then, suddenly, I understood.
‘The poor thing must be in a lot of pain…!’
Enrik: Good grief…
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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