Young Master, Please Put Some Pants On! - Chapter 115

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 115

Today, while having lunch with Fel, I suddenly lost consciousness and collapsed. I thought I had been fine for a while, but it seems I was wrong. I told Fel it was just fatigue, but I’m scared.

I know my body well. The illness that has persistently tormented me since childhood is once again making me anxious and suffering. What if the disease has relapsed? The time given to me is already far too short compared to him, a pureblood… If I were to leave this world early, what would happen to Fel?

Of all days, this had to happen on the day I learned about the existence of imprinting – it all felt like nothing more than God’s cruel joke. I need to confess this truth to Fel quickly, before he imprints on me.

Perhaps there’s a way to stay by Fel’s side while hiding this fact. But shouldn’t I at least give Fel the chance to choose his own death?

Mellis’s mind went blank at the unexpected content. To think the Imperial Consort had such worries – she could feel that trembling and fear being transmitted directly to her.

Feeling her heartbeat gradually quickening, she swallowed dryly and carefully turned the page.

Today again, I couldn’t say anything to Fel. The moment I tried to confess my secret, I could picture him coldly leaving my side. I was afraid he would abandon me. Afraid he would stop loving me, even though I know that’s impossible…

What exactly am I afraid of? Even after receiving so much love, I hated myself for being unable to help but doubt his love.

How wonderful it would have been if I had been born healthy like other people! If only I hadn’t hidden anything from him from the very beginning, it wouldn’t be this painful. No, if only I had never fallen in love with him in the first place…

I was simply afraid that my selfish desire to love him had ruined everything. The deeper my affection for him grew, the more I resented myself. Even knowing that my presence brought his death closer, I couldn’t stop loving him. I was trembling with rage at my own selfishness.

…Why do people in love make such foolish choices?

Similar content continued for several pages after that. Lilia blamed herself for being unable to tell Persiana the truth, while fearing the approaching future and unable to muster courage.

Looking at the diary stained and blotched with tear marks, Mellis silently bit her lips hard. Each sentence Lilia had written pierced her heart like thorns. It felt exactly as if someone had peered into her own mind.

With a trembling heart, Mellis opened the next page. As if something had happened in the meantime, several months had passed since the last entry.

It’s been five days since His Imperial Majesty suddenly passed away, and there’s still no word from Fel, who hurriedly entered the Imperial Court. But from the rumors I hear, it seems certain that Fel will ascend to the throne.

Emperor… His existence, which already felt distant, seemed to become even more unreachable. And at the same time, I was afraid. Would I be someone who could help Fel, help the Empire’s future?

Just as Fel knows me well, I also know him well. Even if not to the extent that he loves and cherishes the Empire, I too loved this country.

Fel has dreamed of a new world from before, and the Imperial Throne was a position perfectly suited to achieving that dream. If it’s the Fel I know, he would be able to raise the Empire from crisis again. And furthermore, he might even be able to create a new world. The man I love was that kind of person.

I know. What such a man needs is not a sickly woman of commoner origin, but a strong empress who can support him with solid power…

Fel loved me even knowing everything. When he vowed to dedicate his remaining life for me, I made the same vow. That I would dedicate the life given to me to him.

Persiana von Severus, you probably can’t even imagine how much I love you.

The remaining diary entries were filled with Lilia’s story of choosing the position of Imperial Consort rather than Empress. However, those didn’t remain in Mellis’s memory.

Mellis let out a soft sigh and pressed her mouth with one hand. She had a vague idea of why the Imperial Consort had left her the diary. But her mind was hazy as if covered in fog.

She had known that imprinting wasn’t simply a romantic symbol of love, but the weight she actually faced was much more serious. It felt like a huge lump of lead had been placed on her chest.

Lilia had confessed her secret to Persiana, and Persiana had loved Lilia even knowing everything.

She too had entertained such thoughts. When listening to his tender confessions, an indescribable greed would slowly seep out. Since he already loves me, wouldn’t he forgive me at least once? Couldn’t he understand my situation of having no choice but to hide my secret?

“Yes. Even if you were a human who came to take my life.”

Recalling his low voice made her eyes feel like they might redden for no reason. If it was him as she knew him, he would surely embrace her wrongdoing.

However, she didn’t want to do such a cowardly thing by relying on his love. Unlike Lilia, it was already too late to confess everything truthfully. Even if he forgave her sins, the fact that she had been deceiving him all this time wouldn’t change.

Suddenly, a fundamental question arose in Mellis’s mind.

‘Why… can’t I let go of my human identity?’

Mellis stared down at her palm where faint scars stretched across it.

Her subconscious constantly craved her identity as a human, and each time it would dig in more fiercely to manifest healing power. But perhaps for her, healing power wasn’t a dream she wanted to achieve, but rather greed she couldn’t let go of and lingering attachment to what had already passed.

Vivian and Arsian had said that she could be satisfied with her current life because she was living by acting as a beastkin. And Mellis had agreed with their words as well. But…

‘What if I’m no longer acting?’

Mellis quietly clenched her fists in anguish. What if she really abandoned her identity as a human and lived her entire life as a beastkin? If she could turn lies into truth, wouldn’t that solve everything?

But it wasn’t as easy as it sounded. To abandon her entire life for an experience of barely even a year.

“…”

Gently closing her eyes, Mellis recalled her memories one by one. Where she had truly been happy, who had taught her love, what her world was woven from.

Her comfortable room that she had decorated to her taste for the first time, the people of the ducal residence who praised even small things and rejoiced as if they were their own, Anna who always showed thoughtful consideration, Noel who silently stayed by her side and Malcolm who unknowingly encouraged her, and even baby Young Master Garulus who always made her happy whether she was sad or joyful.

Finally, at the image of Kermanomon that rose before her eyes, Mellis unconsciously showed a bright smile.

Duke Severus’s mansion was a new world unfolded before her, and another dream that made her want to live. Having realized this, Mellis was no longer afraid of anything.

Even if her true self was forgotten forever and she could never return to her previous life, it didn’t matter. As long as she could avoid losing all of this…

“…”

Mellis bit her lips deeply with some kind of resolve.

Just as she was about to close the diary again, she discovered something and stopped. The last page of the diary had been torn out significantly. It wasn’t just the last page. Upon checking again, the number of pages seemed subtly sparse compared to the thickness of the spine.

Suddenly feeling puzzled, Mellis skimmed through the diary from the beginning again and noticed that certain parts of the diary had been torn out.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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