There’s Something Special About Her - Chapter 89
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Episode 89.
You went through all that trouble for just one trainee?
“That’s why I intend to request a change of course for trainee Hanno Becker from the director. However, before that, I should first confirm whether his intentions remain unchanged—though as an instructor, I cannot ask him directly.”
“It might feel like a different form of pressure otherwise.”
That was fair.
If he transferred to the Liberal Arts Course, he’d attend Wilfried Kessler’s classes frequently, and from the trainee’s perspective, it was impossible to know how it would look if someone like that brought up a change of course first.
‘Not a bad person for an instructor.’
Having assessed Kessler with that evaluation, I gave him the answer he wanted to hear.
“I’ll have a separate conversation with him and report back, instructor.”
And so I’d gained another excuse to talk with Wilfried Kessler.
***
“Hanno.”
“Rookie?”
I’d finally tracked down Hanno Becker, who’d been nowhere to be seen until dinner time.
He was in the Ancient Document Archive Room, the most secluded and empty corner of the Library.
The guy was crouched in a corner between the towering shelves.
“How did you know I was here?”
“I searched for you, so I found you.”
I pulled out a small piece of bread wrapped in a napkin from my pocket and handed it to him, then settled down beside him.
“H-Hey, food isn’t allowed in the Library.”
“You didn’t eat lunch either. Settle your stomach with this and let’s go grab dinner.”
“……Thanks.”
Hanno Becker said that, but he didn’t bring the bread to his mouth.
Even with no one watching, he seemed reluctant to break the rules.
“You could fit that in one bite, but you’re being so fussy.”
“I’ll eat it with dinner later.”
“Fine then.”
As I nodded and looked around, I started to understand why Hanno Becker was here.
The tall bookshelves gave off a weighty sense of calm and stability.
But that good impression vanished the moment I carelessly put my hand down and felt black dust cling to my palm.
“You’re not even reading anything, so why are you hiding in this dusty corner?”
“I was just looking for a place to be alone, haha.”
“Do you want to be alone? Should I leave?”
“No, no! Actually, I was feeling pretty lonely.”
Hanno Becker laughed, a bit sheepishly, but his complexion was definitely dark.
It seemed like a good time to bring up what I’d heard from Kessler.
“Is it that hard keeping up with the Martial Arts Course Classes?”
“Huh?”
“Is that why you’re feeling down right now?”
At my blunt question, Hanno Becker’s brown eyes trembled wildly.
“Why are you so shocked? It’s obvious just looking at you.”
“Y-You could tell that easily? I tried so hard not to show it.”
His face flushed red.
……Did I speak too carelessly?
This must be something pretty serious he’s been worrying about.
Maybe it was time to activate my Persuasive Speaking skill, which I’d kept dormant around Hanno Becker.
“Well, I see you every day, so I notice. Come on, tell me what’s bothering you. Who knows—maybe as you talk it through, you’ll see a way forward.”
“Hmm. M-Maybe?”
He seemed relieved that I offered to listen, but he still struggled to open up.
Normally, I’d break down questions into smaller pieces and ask them one by one to get the truth out faster, but this time I chose to wait patiently.
For some reason, that’s what I wanted to do for Hanno Becker.
“So, the thing is. I actually wanted to be assigned to the Finance Department. That’s why I applied for the Liberal Arts Course. But because of my build, I ended up getting admitted to the Martial Arts Course instead.”
“You found that out after you’d already been admitted?”
“Yeah, so I was pretty shocked at first.”
Damn Nox.
All organizations operate that way, but assigning someone without even asking for their consent—that was absurd.
It made me even angrier, remembering that fool Edward who’d apparently arranged a wedding without asking me either.
“So, it’s been kind of…… hard to deal with, I guess.”
“Mm.”
It seemed like time to deploy my questioning technique.
“‘Hard to deal with’ is such a vague word, though.”
“Is it?”
“You can suffer when you’re hurt, suffer when you’re sad. You can suffer when you’re tired, even when you’re afraid.”
“I-I’m afraid!”
Hanno Becker blurted that out almost shouting, then flinched at the sound of his own voice.
When he spoke again, his voice returned to its usual quiet tone.
“I’m afraid of hurting someone.”
“Wait.”
I needed to blink a few times to fully process what he’d just said.
“So you’re not afraid that someone will hurt you—you’re afraid that you’ll hurt someone else?”
“Yeah.”
Hanno Becker rubbed his forehead against his upright knee as if the very thought was unbearable.
“When I was little. Around seven years old, my younger sister was born. She was my parents’ second child, and since she was a girl and new, she was so fascinating and pretty. So I snuck into the nursery without our mother knowing. I just wanted to peek at her while she was sleeping and leave.”
“……And then?”
“Then Emilia saw me and smiled. She reached her hands out toward me. So I was happy too and took her hand, but I didn’t control my strength. I didn’t know a baby under a year old was so fragile.”
“So your sister now……?”
“Oh, Emilia’s fine! She got treatment quickly. Now she’s in her gorgeous teenage phase. She’s got incredible strength too, and she’s tough—almost as much as I am!”
“Geez. You should’ve said that right away.”
Even as I shot him a look, Hanno Becker grinned.
Just mentioning his sister seemed to brighten him up.
“Anyway, after that I’ve always been careful. Because of that, my personality got more timid and cautious too……”
I’d thought his habit of always hunching that massive frame, always keeping his voice down and speaking quietly, was just his nature.
But it seemed the shock from childhood had left a deeper mark than I’d realized.
Still, there was something in the last thing Hanno Becker said that kept nagging at me.
“Hey, Hanno. This is just me talking as someone who doesn’t know your full situation, so you can ignore it if you want?”
“What do you mean, Rookie? Are you trying to scare me?”
He laughed, being a bit dramatic about it.
“The reason you’re suffering. I don’t think it’s just because you’re afraid of hurting someone.”
“……Then what?”
“Suffering is when your feelings and your situation don’t match up, isn’t it? When you want to rest but can’t, so you suffer. When you don’t want to be in pain but the pain keeps coming, so you suffer. That kind of thing.”
“Y-Yeah, I guess.”
“So maybe your suffering comes from the fact that you want to live comfortably, but you can’t. You have to keep yourself small because you’re afraid of hurting someone, you have to stay tense in case you can’t control your strength. If I were in your position, I’d suffer too.”
“Oh……”
Hanno Becker opened his mouth and blinked his eyes.
“I’ve never thought about it that way before.”
“Then try thinking about it now. How about this—what if the person you had to face in Sparring Class wasn’t a person at all, but something like a straw dummy?”
I raised both fists and pantomimed striking at the air a couple of times as I asked.
“Would you still hate it?”
“Then……”
Hanno Becker’s eyes rolled as he thought for a moment, and a faint smile crossed his face.
“I think I’d enjoy it. I’d want to test just how strong my power is……. Oh, w-wait, I mean, I’d only want to do that so I can be more careful, of course!”
He quickly added that correction.
That way of thinking right there—that was a habit.
A habit that needed to be broken.
“Hey, Hanno.”
“Yeah?”
“It’s not wrong to feel joy and excitement. Just because you’re strong, just because you have a loud voice and a big frame, doesn’t mean you have to crouch and suppress yourself your whole life.”
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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