The Villainess Lives Twice - Chapter 181

—————
This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
—————

Chapter 181

Lisia going to the Western Regions was a good idea. As Lisia said, the time when the autumn harvest begins was an important period.

For the relief grain system, filling the warehouses was just as important as distributing the grain. Now that the practical work was about to begin, it would be better to have someone trustworthy watching over it.

Nevertheless, Artizea couldn’t easily tell her to go ahead.

She expected Lawrence to leave the capital. So there was no need to send Lisia away.

But Cedric looked at Lisia and said.

“You think that’s what should be done, don’t you?”

“…Yes.”

“You’re not the kind of person who does meaningless things.”

Saying that, Cedric looked at Artizea again.

When he said that much, Artizea couldn’t say no.

As Cedric said, Lisia wouldn’t have said such things for no reason.

And if that was work Lisia thought was worthwhile, it was proper to send her.

“Do that.”

Artizea caught her breath a little and answered.

“Tell me whatever you need. Come back whenever you want to return.”

“It’s not like I’m going away forever, I’m just going to do the work you’ve entrusted to me. Once I arrive there, I’ll assess the situation immediately and report to you.”

“Alright.”

Artizea nodded.

Lisia hesitated for a moment and looked at Cedric. Cedric lightly gestured with his palm, waving it slightly.

That meant she didn’t need to return the pistol.

Lisia understood the meaning and nodded. Then she bowed again and withdrew.

She closed the door and let out a long sigh.

Time would make everything alright. But for now, she wanted to leave everything to Cedric and just do what she wished while giving her heart some rest.

Artizea didn’t understand Cedric’s gesture. She sent him a questioning look about what it meant, but Cedric brought up something else.

“Lisia will do well.”

“Yes.”

“You sent her because maintaining the people’s hearts in the Western Regions was necessary, right?”

“Yes… Next year there’s a high possibility of drought, so I want to stockpile grain this year and soothe the people before their hearts become restless.”

“Lisia is the right person for it. It’s also work she wanted to do herself.”

Cedric put down the pen he was holding and turned completely toward Artizea.

And he said.

“Since it was work she had her heart set on, she’ll be grateful to you for giving her the opportunity to prepare for disaster.”

“…”

Artizea couldn’t readily answer. She hesitated and only looked down at her own fingers.

Cedric rubbed his face with his palm once.

And he was about to speak.

But Artizea spoke first. Because she was looking down, she couldn’t see what expression Cedric was making.

“There’s something I should have told you but haven’t been able to yet.”

“Please tell me.”

“It was Lady Lisia’s last words. She asked me to tell you… that she lived without regrets…”

Her breath trembled so much she could hardly continue speaking.

It had been nearly 10 years since Lisia died. And now it was something that no longer existed.

Yet that day’s voice rang clearly in her ears.

「Remove at least my weight from the burden you’re carrying.」

If she had known how heavy that weight was, she wouldn’t have been able to say such words.

At first, she was just a saint to be used. The same as any other person.

She had thought that if you peeled away the shell, what lay beneath would be no different from any other ugly ordinary human.

But after getting to know her, it became heavier day by day.

After she died, it became a burden too great to escape from.

Her own life could never have substituted for Lisia’s life.

There had never been a crossroads where Lisia’s death and her own death were the choices.

But she had never escaped from the thought that she should have died instead of Lisia.

Cedric pulled Artizea’s wrist toward him. Artizea was drawn along weakly and fell into his arms.

“You’ve been keeping that in your heart all this time?”

“But…”

“Lisia is alive.”

Cedric gently stroked her hair.

“And she truly wouldn’t have had any regrets. I know. Apart from the grief and sadness I felt at losing her… no matter how difficult it was, how painful, even if she couldn’t achieve what she hoped for, she lived throwing her whole body into it enough to leave no regrets in her life.”

And Lisia didn’t fail.

When Artizea shed tears, Cedric knew that.

Surely even when she closed her eyes, she had no regrets.

Artizea held her breath.

She was comforted to the point of tears. But at the same time, her heart pounded painfully from the warm affection that emanated from Cedric’s voice.

Cedric placed his hand on Artizea’s chin. Her bowed head naturally lifted up.

Cedric sighed a little.

Saying such things wasn’t easy for him either.

“I’m saying this because you seem to be misunderstanding.”

“What…?”

“I never once thought of Lisia as a woman. She was too young when I first started seeing her for that. Lisia probably never thought of me as more than an older brother either.”

Artizea sat quietly on his lap. But her muscles tensed enough for her whole body to jump up.

Cedric laughed as if it was absurd.

“Why are you surprised? For someone in my position, isn’t a non-political marriage the more unusual thing? You were the one who proposed a contract to pretend at a love marriage with the intention of causing a stir, so you shouldn’t be surprised, should you?”

“But the other party was Lady Lisia.”

“It wasn’t a marriage alliance between factions, but it was decided because the circumstances happened to align. Lisia was someone I could trust.”

That marriage wasn’t a bad plan.

Even if something happened to Cedric, Lisia would have been able to lead Evron.

On Lisia’s side too, there was the expectation that if she at least had the name of Duchess of Evron, the temple wouldn’t be able to manipulate her at will.

There were several more practical reasons.

Lisia didn’t want to receive financial support from the temple. Because she wanted to act freely.

Cedric wanted to transfer his assets in the central and eastern regions to Lisia. However, under the name of Baron Morthen, she couldn’t protect them even if he gave them all to her.

Even if personnel could be solved with money, reliable military force wasn’t easy to obtain. The regions that needed a saint were mainly those with poor security.

To control the situation, both power and military force were necessary.

And there were also dangers that arose from Lisia being a young and beautiful woman. There were quite a few nobles who coveted her and came after her.

Cedric had decided to support Lisia, but he couldn’t pour everything into it without proper justification.

So he concluded it would be better to just get married. Then it wouldn’t look strange no matter what he did for her.

And even without Cedric’s special attention, Lisia could protect herself and utilize resources on her own.

The name Duchess of Evron could serve as an appropriate fence for Lisia.

Furthermore, Cedric himself could escape from talk about marriage.

“I did decide carefully. You would have known better than me what stability and benefits that marriage would bring, wouldn’t you?”

Cedric said.

“But personally speaking, anyone I could trust would have been fine.”

With Lisia, they could have lived supporting each other. He could be helpful to her work, and he was confident she was someone who suited being Duchess of Evron.

However, he didn’t accept that as his married life.

If it wasn’t a woman he loved anyway, anyone would have been similar.

Artizea realized the meaning and stammered.

“But, but… you loved her, didn’t you?”

It certainly seemed that way. No one doubted it.

The reason Lawrence had gone mad and rampaged could not be called a small part of it.

It was the same now. He wasn’t doubting that she had loved him back then too.

However, even though he had decided to believe, the things he had thought were facts didn’t just disappear from his mind in an instant.

Cedric let out a sigh.

“Affection and love aren’t synonyms, and faith and devotion don’t always come with passion.”

“But….”

“It’s true that I trusted Lisia. Back then, if Lisia needed it, I would have gladly given my life.”

Now it was a little different. He still trusted and cherished Lisia, but he could no longer give his life.

Because he had become the husband of the woman he loved and the father of the child to be born.

But back then, that’s how it was.

“I had lost too much. I thought it would be better for me to just end rather than lose something else again. And I believed that she could accomplish something using my life as a stepping stone.”

In the end, that opportunity never came.

Cedric thought it was fortunate, and also thought it was regrettable.

He had both the desire to dump the burden on Lisia and feel at ease, and conversely, the desire to make her comfortable.

That was comradeship, and it was also familial love. These were emotions born from sharing heavy responsibility and sorrow.

And that empathy never progressed to a stage beyond that. Because he was already in love with someone else.

He wasn’t skilled enough to turn back a heart that had once tilted and pour it out to someone else again.

Artizea couldn’t utter a word of denial. She just held her breath and curled up her body.

She tried to lower her head again, but Cedric didn’t allow it.

A bitter and faint smile dwelled in his eyes.

“You say you’re loyal to me, yet there are too many parts you don’t actually believe.”

Saying that, Cedric lightly placed his lips on Artizea’s lips.

His breath tickled Artizea’s philtrum. The delicate movement made Artizea’s lips tremble.

Artizea clenched her hand that was placed on Cedric’s chest into a fist.

But soon the strength left her hand. Feeling like she might collapse, Artizea put strength back into her hand and gripped Cedric’s collar.

A sweet taste swirled inside her parted lips.

Cedric cupped her cheek with his hand again. Artizea looked up at him with a dazed feeling.

Cedric made her rest her face against his chest again and patted her.

“It’s making me troubled, so let’s stop now.”

“Wh-what?”

Cedric let out another sigh.

“Don’t act innocent only at times like this.”

Artizea lowered her head with a reddened face. It was because she had understood.

—————
This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
—————