The Trashy PD Has To Survive as an Idol - Chapter 81
—————
This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
—————
81
“AAAAHHHHH!”
The members, who had been sprawled about lazily, jolted upright at the youngest member’s scream. Everyone rushed to open the door and glanced around frantically. There wasn’t a single Broadcasting Staff member in sight.
“What? Where did all the staff go?”
The eerie silence, with only equipment scattered about, sent an inexplicable chill through the air. Kim Sung-hyun, his brow furrowed, was the first to cross the threshold and speak.
“Let’s find Jung Da-jun first.”
“Yeah, let’s look for him.”
I casually reassured the members while subtly winking at the rear camera where they couldn’t see me. Just then, Jung Da-jun came sprinting from the field where he’d been harvesting radish greens, screaming.
“HEEEEELLLPPP!!”
“Ugh!”
I had no idea why he was emerging from that direction when he’d supposedly gone to do an interview, but Jung Da-jun—with his disheveled hair and ghostly pale face, shrieking in the dead of night—looked far more like a ghost himself.
Kang Yi-chae grabbed the panicked Jung Da-jun and asked with concern.
“Da-jun, are you okay?”
“B-brother…”
“Why did you scream? What happened?”
I’d set the bait perfectly.
“Brother, it’s just… a ghost, no wait, I came out and all the staff were gone…”
“Take your time and tell us.”
“I was trying to get an interview cut, but there were no staff members in that room over there. So I checked the courtyard too, and just in case, I went to the field to see if anyone was there… don’t be startled.”
Given how much Jung Da-jun despised anything frightening, I doubted he’d looked very thoroughly, but regardless, his complexion was far too pallid as his lips trembled while he spoke.
“I think… I think I saw a ghost.”
Haha.
“…Huh?”
“He was so unnaturally pale, and then he just vanished in an instant…”
“You must have seen it wrong.”
“I’m telling you it’s real!”
“Sigh…”
I brushed my hair back as if troubled, then picked up my phone and pretended to call someone.
“The broadcasting staff aren’t answering either…”
“W-we’re really alone?”
“They probably went back to get materials or something. Wait here. I’ll go look around and come back.”
“Nooo!! Don’t leave me alone!!”
Jung Da-jun grabbed Kang Yi-chae’s waist and began clinging to him persistently. Kang Yi-chae slowly peeled away his arms like an octopus and spoke.
“Stay here with Hyun-sung and Ji-won. I’ll go with Ho-yoon.”
“Let’s go, Kang Yi-chae.”
“Okay.”
“Ugh, ugh, ugh…”
After coaxing Jung Da-jun, who desperately wanted to find stability among the members, I slipped out of the room with Kang Yi-chae.
“Phew…”
Once we’d moved some distance away and only the two of us remained in the darkened field, Kang Yi-chae glanced back at the house, then turned to me and spoke.
“Hyung.”
“What.”
“I’m curious about something.”
Kang Yi-chae adjusted his umbrella and let out a smirk.
“Was your grudge from last time’s surprise really that deep? Did you want to prank us that badly?”
I stopped walking and looked at Kang Yi-chae. Meeting his gaze, I smiled.
“This is why I hate people who read the room too well.”
“Ha ha.”
“When did you figure it out?”
“When I started talking about a healing variety show?”
So that’s when he caught on?
“That’s insane, you too.”
“You’ve got good instincts?”
Exactly.
There’s no way Seo Ho-yoon, the PD known behind the scenes to cast members as “Grinning” for his expertise in malicious editing, would genuinely produce a rural healing variety show.
Well, if I were told to do it, I could edit it brilliantly, but there’s no way I’d end it with just the stars’ ordinary daily lives.
I feel a bit embarrassed saying it myself, but I’m a specialist in nuclear-bomb-level spicy content.
A horror special masquerading as a healing variety show!
Produced by: Seo Ho-yoon.
Assistant Director(?): Kang Yi-chae.
Cast: Sung Ji-won, Kim Sung-hyun, Jung Da-jun.
Already imagining the edited version and grinning with satisfaction, Kang Yi-chae chuckled and asked.
“One’s by the field… where are the rest?”
“Field. Bathroom. Back storage.”
“You’re thorough with your preparations.”
“Of course.”
I raised my index finger and turned my head back.
“Now, listen up, Yi-chae.”
I smiled with pure delight.
“About now, there should be a sound coming from the bathroom.”
“Aaaahhhhh!”
Kim Sung-hyun’s scream erupted.
“And by now, they should be screaming in the warehouse too.”
“Kyaaaaaaah!”
Once again, Jung Da-jun’s scream erupted.
‘…Huh? It’s not Sung Ji-won.’
I’d expected Sung Ji-won to be the one screaming, but… the plan had deviated slightly. Not that it mattered.
“Ah, how delightful…”
“…”
“He’s got some lungs on him. You’re getting a real workout, aren’t you?”
Kang Yi-chae clicked his tongue.
“Hyung, how… what did the world do to you to deserve this?”
Kang Yi-chae, suspecting that cameras were hidden throughout the place, held his tongue.
“Right. Even I’m curious why I went that far.”
The rain had begun to let up. I folded the umbrella and walked toward the warehouse with a splash-splash, only to find the members huddled together beneath it, their faces drained of all color.
‘My, how adorable.’
“Content shoot complete!”
Right on cue, the staff burst out from various spots with smiles on their faces. Like the last surprise, they brought a cake with them.
[It’s summer after all♡
-Ho-yoon~]
“Variety show complete! Congratulations on successfully finishing the Ocean Train activities~!”
“Sur-prise~.”
That last part was from me. I approached with a beaming smile, and Kim Sung-hyun and Jung Da-jun immediately started pounding my back.
Laughter erupted from the surrounding staff. Especially each time my back received a resounding smack—thwack, thwack—Lee Ji-hyun’s expression grew increasingly refreshed.
Right, watching the source of a stressed office worker’s suffering get beaten down must feel pretty cathartic.
“It’s my brother! He’s my brother!!”
“I told you something felt off!!”
“Ow, ow, that hurts.”
Even as they struck me, I couldn’t suppress my laughter. The only flaw was that Sung Ji-won alone maintained an unfazed expression throughout.
Everyone else was shocked, so why was Sung Ji-won the only one unaffected?
Noticing my gaze, Sung Ji-won tilted his head curiously.
“What?”
“Why didn’t you scream?”
He was completely composed.
When I asked him that, Sung Ji-won blinked slowly, then let out an odd sound of realization.
“Ah… well. I’m actually terrified of this sort of thing normally.”
Sung Ji-won smiled faintly.
“There’s something scarier than ghosts in this world.”
“What is it?”
“A career gap.”
“…”
“…A failed debut?”
“…”
The atmosphere on the filming set turned solemn in an instant.
‘Let’s edit out the failed debut part…’
Whether we called it a career gap or not, we all just exchanged glances at the mention of Sung Ji-won—who had spent seven years as a trainee only to have his debut fall through right before it happened—and quickly changed the subject.
“Um, well, you see. Everyone here has already seen it.”
Kim Sung-hyun, having nothing appropriate to say, spoke awkwardly while looking at the ghost-costumed staff members mixed among the other staff. They were staff members too.
Though a bit crude, the makeup was effective enough for a jump scare.
“Thank you for your hard work…”
“You were so incredibly professional that we’re truly grateful…”
Jung Da-jun gritted his teeth as he spoke. Of course, his chubby cheeks only emphasized how adorable he looked.
As I watched him with satisfaction, Kang Yi-chae tilted his head beside me.
“Wait? But why are there only three?”
“Why?”
“Isn’t it four?”
The sudden remark made the filming set atmosphere tense again. Kang Yi-chae muttered while looking at the ghost-costumed staff members.
“Actually, I ran into one more person earlier when I went to do interviews. That person looked way more realistic, so I thought, wow, they really prepared hard for this…?”
“Hmm?”
I tilted my head in confusion. The staff members murmured amongst themselves.
“What are you talking about? Everyone here is accounted for.”
“…Really? Not four?”
“Three people.”
Kang Yi-chae’s mouth fell open blankly before his gaze turned toward me. When I nodded seriously, he frowned and stammered his words.
“Then, that means it was really….”
“Ahhhhhhh! Don’t say it!”
Jung Da-jun screamed and rolled across the floor. Enter Jung Da-jun the dust magnet.
“I can’t sleep! I can’t sleep here!”
“Then you should go upstairs alone and leave us behind, I guess….”
“Kyaaaaaaah!”
Jung Da-jun cried out, begging us to stay with him, and even the staff members gathered together with gloomy expressions.
Just as the chaotic atmosphere seemed to be settling down, Jung Da-jun turned up our song loudly on his phone. Whether to overcome their fear or not, the members began singing live.
“You’re my only answer!! You are my key!!”
“You, whom I’ve been searching for endlessly~!!! You are the one~!!”
‘Are they doing a live performance here?’
Their vocal power was so tremendous that even the ghosts would have fled. I seized the opportunity in the midst of the commotion to slip away from the members, gestured toward the cameraman, and moved to a different spot. As I glanced toward Lee Ji-hyun standing beside the warehouse, she caught on immediately and followed me behind the storage.
“Wow, Seo Ho-yoon!”
Lee Ji-hyun gave a thumbs up with a snap.
“Your acting was absolutely fantastic.”
“You worked so hard. Both your makeup and performance were excellent.”
There was a man already occupying a spot, wiping away white makeup with a makeup sheet.
That ghost Kang Yi-chae had supposedly seen earlier.
“Wow, I never thought you’d actually fool even Kang Yi-chae like that.”
“Is there something you’ve seen me fail at?”
“…Aegyo?”
“Why are you like that to me?”
Anyway, as I laughed with a mischievous expression, the camera staff captured me while suppressing their laughter. Lee Ji-hyun, stress now relieved, giggled.
It was the final trump card, prepared in secret and known only to a few staff members.
“Say something to Kang Yi-chae.”
“Aha.”
The camera zoomed in, and I winked, blinking one eye.
“Yi-chae~.”
Your brother’s feeling great!
“Feels good now, doesn’t it?”
Ding!
[Wow~! You jerk!]
Seo Ho-yoon the PD had created another flawless program!
***
[Title: The Dun User Content Uploaded This Time
What’s with the amount of content this time?
It’s apparently divided into 3 parts
Part 1: Planning + Arrival and playing the LP video
Part 2: Making bibimbap + Writing in the time capsule
Part 3: (Spoiler)
I was already crying tears of joy and completely satisfied with just parts 1 and 2..
This healing concept was suggested by Hoyun ㅠㅠ Even the planning of our genius idol was perfect… In fact, this is the first time that a planning video like this has been uploaded (excluding Shining Star, who gets cursed just by talking about itㅅㅂ)
I was in the middle of crying because I realized Ho-yoon actually wanted to do this kind of healing variety show, even though he was pretending otherwise
(Screenshot of Seo Ho-yoon playing the LP)
“Oppa… do you remember? We worked together at the student council during our festival… We kept making eye contact… (Sorry, not oppa—you’re more like my nephew’s age)”
(Screenshot of bibimbap)
But this guy’s bibimbap hahaha. What kind of cafeteria bibimbap is this? His hands are too big haha. Meanwhile, Hoyun says, ‘This is bibimbap that Hoyun made by hand.’
“What the hell, does Seo Ho-yoon get blackmailed sometimes?”
I don’t know why he keeps doing this, but anyway thank you
(Omitted….)
Spoilers start from here
(Spoiler warning)
(Spoiler warning)
(Spoiler warning)
(Screenshot of Jung Da-jun screaming)
Summer
Night
Special
Edition
So this wasn’t a rural healing special—it was a summer night special!!!
【The camera fast-forwards, then cuts back to the planning stage….】
Planning Team: Is this payback for the surprise last time…?
Seo Ho-yoon: (quickly) No.
Planning Team: But you answered way too fast..
Seo Ho-yoon: No.
Seo Ho-yoon sure holds grudges more than expected
Anyway, after eating, The Dun members were watching a horror film..
(Screenshot of Jung Da-jun screaming)
Jung Da-jun was apparently so scared he actually cried a little lol he said he wouldn’t watch midway through and just lay down but there were tear streaks on his pillow it was hilarious
(Screenshot of Seo Ho-yoon’s acting)
Jung Da-jun: He looked so pale and inhuman, and then he just vanished in an instant..
Seo Ho-yoon: (annoyed) You must have seen it wrong.
Jung Da-jun: I’m telling you it’s real!
Seo Ho-yoon: Sigh…
Jung Da-jun: (frustrated)
At this point Kang Yi-chae followed along and they talked but apparently the audio was completely edited out, only the installed camera footage is shown
(Screenshot of Kim Sung-hyun startled at the bathroom entrance)
(Screenshot of Sung Ji-won unfazed no matter what + Niagara Falls composite)
And then comes a compilation of Sung Ji-won’s famous quotes
>>>>The scariest thing is a gap in activity<<<>>>Yi-chae, isn’t it nice and cool now?<<>>>Yi-chae, isn’t it nice and cool now?<<>>>Yi-chae, isn’t it nice and cool now?<<<
At the end, he suddenly screams
└Seo Ho-yoon was really bad
Even thinking about it again, he was really bad
└└Looks like he ground it in hard
└└Don’t grind our rabbit’s teeth ㅠ
└└└I'm… getting a bit scared of this moe version now…]
"Hey, but lol kids find this scary, like what's so scary about this?"
So today I'm going to sleep hugging our dog Kkoong-i
└Let's hear Kkoong-i's perspective
└└Kkoong-i: Ugh, seriously]
[Guys, I didn't mean for you to prove it with a live stream like this (crying-laughing emoji)
└The fact that Seo Ho-yoon did all of this while wearing that 'true culprit' t-shirt is so funny]
The members, who belatedly confirmed the truth, beat Seo Ho-yoon's back so hard that it still ached, but the response was good regardless.
However, the reaction I thought would end here exploded dramatically again with a post that came up later.
[Title: Seriously, what is this in episode 3?
It looks like something is staring from behind the white thing
└Why are you like this
└Don't do this to me at dawn]
And then another post went up.
[Title: Emergency
It's something that feels like 0.5 seconds, so it passes quickly
(Photo behind the tree)
└…Tell me it's a staff member
This is after Kang Yi-chae's surprise even ended.
Please just pick up on the hint, damn it.
Hahaha sorry about that hahahaha
Soon, YouTube was flooded with videos titled [The 'White Thing' That Appeared During an Idol's Broadcast, What Is It?!], [Male Idol Sees a Ghost During Broadcast].
And so, unintentionally, whether it was a real ghost or not, ordinary people came rushing in to watch, and the third episode's view count hit 1.2 million.
A full 1.2 million.
The Manager looked at me and spent a moment praying to every deity in existence.
"Please tell the ghost I'm grateful…."
"No, if you pray like that, what are we supposed to do?"
Then I really do get punished.
When I made an exasperated expression, the Manager cleared his throat and hurriedly pulled the car over, then turned his body toward me.
"You'll do well today, right?"
"Yes."
"Ahhh! I'm even more excited! Today's finally the first audition."
Right, I'd heard that phrase so many times it had become ingrained in my ears.
The Manager seemed to have no doubt that I would pass.
"If you do well, the second round! And next is the finals!!"
"…."
I'd given this part considerable thought.
Initially, acting itself wasn't important—I simply needed an excuse to meet with Kim Sook-hee.
But then it occurred to me: if I performed too poorly, would Kim Sook-hee even be willing to have a conversation with me? On the other hand, with only B-rank acting ability, no amount of effort would let me outshine the existing actors anyway, so why bother making it obvious that I wasn't trying?
"Yes. Well, I'll do my best."
That's how I'd rationalized it so carelessly.
I hadn't considered that even with B-rank ability, if the character and my portrayal created extraordinary chemistry, I could achieve a synchronization rate that exceeded my actual skill level.
—————
This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
—————