The Trashy PD Has To Survive as an Idol - Chapter 30

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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30

I could already see Lim Hyun-sung clutching the back of her neck as if she might collapse.

“…I apologize in advance~.”
“Aha, what are you planning that warrants an apology?”

I wasn’t genuinely sorry—this was an apology for broadcast purposes.
I settled into my chair, swept my hair back, and picked up the microphone, not forgetting to let out an exasperated sigh in Lim Hyun-sung’s characteristic style.

“Jung Da-jun.”
“Huh, y-yes… yes.”
“Why do you think rhythm exists?”

Jung Da-jun flinched in surprise.

“I-I’m sorry.”
“You shouldn’t apologize to me—apologize to the viewers. Watching such low-quality performances during dinner time will completely ruin their appetite.”
“Ahahaha!”

Yoo Ji-a’s laughter burst out immediately.
By the way, every line I was delivering was something Lim Hyun-sung had actually said before.
Super Singer ran for five seasons, and Lim Hyun-sung was a judge in every single one, so even the other idols were visibly struggling to suppress their laughter.
Yet Jung Da-jun himself was trembling with tears, shaking his head. I couldn’t tell if it was an act or genuine emotion.

“I’m sorry… I should have practiced the recorder more diligently….”
“Diligently?”
“Yes?”
“If hard work alone could do it, why would talent even exist?”
“Ahahaha! It’s exactly the same!”
“Oh no… I… my cheeks hurt.”

By this point, Yoo Ji-a had buried her face in the table and was practically crying with laughter. Now that I thought about it, she seemed to have some connection with Lim Hyun-sung.
After thoroughly devastating the production crew and the members alike, we wrapped up the sketch.

“How on earth are you doing it so perfectly?”

Watch the same edited footage over thirty times, and you’ll manage it.

“It’s because I deeply respect that person.”

I turned my gaze toward the camera.
To prevent any potential controversy, I drove home the point of our closeness.

“Composer, I truly admire you. Thank you always!”

I wrinkled my nose at the camera. Jung Da-jun, still apparently afraid of Lim Hyun-sung, bowed ninety degrees at the camera. Later, I found out that the subtitle had included Lim Hyun-sung’s direct comment: [Ho-yoon, let’s stop contacting each other from now on], which was actually hilarious.
In any case, Yoo Ji-a laughed for quite a while before finally picking up the microphone.
Anyway, after laughing for quite a while, Yoo Ji-a finally picked up the microphone.

“Ah, if I had the right to vote, I would have voted for this one. I really enjoyed it. Personally, it seems like the highest synchronization rate among all the Lim Hyun-sung impressions I’ve seen. Maybe because I know her, I was more immersed watching it. Ah, my stomach hurts from laughing.”

The idols who came after were so tense, focused entirely on image management, that their reactions weren’t nearly as good as ours.
Particularly striking was Today.
Particularly impressive was Today.

“Yes, Yoo Hyuk. Have you decided on your special talent?”
“Aegyo, I’ll try doing some aegyo!”
“Let me try being cute and charming!”

Well… it’s not a terrible choice.
If only this weren’t a team competition audition program.
Yoo Hyuk winked while squinting his eyes and clenching his fist.
Yoo Hyuk squinted his eyes, clenched his fist, and winked.

“….”
“Can I say you’re mine?”
“Can I say it’s mine?”

“Damn…”

“We need a pet name that only the two of us know. Honey, honey—so starting today, you’re mine!”

Can I close my eyes?
Everyone’s eyes darted around in considerable confusion.
Particularly the junior members of Today were deeply uncertain about how to react to Yoo Hyuk’s thirty-second performance.
Watching Yoo Hyuk finish with a heart gesture made from his fingers and a playful bite, I couldn’t help but admire him.

‘Still, Yoo Hyuk is really living his best life!’

“…Wow~….”

What remained on the filming set was only an icy silence. The well-mannered juniors offered polite applause toward Today.

“That was cute….”
“Hmm… Our seniors really are something else.”

Yoo Hyuk, having finished his performance, hung his head in embarrassment.
Well, I suppose Today’s fans might enjoy it. Idol aegyo makes for good clips.
But this wasn’t the image the staff wanted in such a fierce competition program.
Kim Hee-young was already cursing with her eyes.
I’d bet money that Kim Hee-young will definitely splice in this awkward moment whenever those scenes come up.

“Haha, well….”
“….”
“That was charming aegyo.”

Yoo Ji-a couldn’t bring herself to add more on the filming set, but with an expression that said ‘Ugh…’, she picked up the next card.

“Well then, shall we proceed with voting?”

The talent show voting followed three rules.
1. You cannot vote for your own group.
2. Voting proceeds according to the maximum member limit.
3. The group with the most votes wins first place.

Thinking the result was already obvious, I entered my vote into the handheld device I’d been given beforehand.
After a brief moment and once all the idols had finished voting, Yoo Ji-a smiled and delivered the scripted line.

“Then let us reveal the glorious first place that will receive exclusive additional broadcast time.”

As she turned away and gestured, the enormous monitor displayed hastily scrawled text.
Gulim font. At least it wasn’t Gungsuh—though if it were up to me, I’d have fired whoever was responsible for that.

“The Dun!”
“Wooooow!”
“Hyung, we’re getting an encore broadcast!”

The moment our group name was called, Jung Da-jun threw his arms around me.
The other members swarmed around us, bouncing with such frenzy that I thought I’d lose my mind from the chaos.

“Hey, calm down. Seriously, calm down.”

I peeled Jung Da-jun off and slipped through the members, and Yoo Ji-a flashed me a thumbs up while Kim Hee-young’s expression flickered past—something unreadable.
A look that said, ‘You shouldn’t be celebrating this hard.’
I turned my gaze away. Fortunately, a break came at just the right moment.

“We’ll take a brief rest before the next performance!”

The instant the camera light died, Yoo Hyuk approached with his face flushed red and white, as if he’d been waiting for this exact moment.

“Ah, senior.”
“You bastard.”

I was offering a polite greeting when his hand roughly grabbed my shoulder.

“Wow.”

Kang Yi-chae let out an exclamation from beside us. Even with the camera off, we were still in front of the staff—yet Yoo Hyuk was being this bold. He snorted and demanded an answer.

“Were you guys planning to make a fool out of me?”

Just as I was about to respond, Kang Yi-chae cut in.

“Huh? What are you talking about?”
“And what about you?”
“Senior, did we perhaps amuse you too much?”

That’s odd—Kang Yi-chae stepping in was unexpected. He’s the type who usually just laughs from the sidelines and watches without getting involved.
Kang Yi-chae smiled sweetly.

“Please calm down. Jung Da-jun will play the recorder for you again~.”
“Both of you bastards…! You knew beforehand, didn’t you? That talent show performances couldn’t be songs or dances! You knew all about getting two chances if you wrote down first place?!”
“Good grief. People only see what they want to see, I suppose.”

I dug at my ear.
In that instant, Yoo Hyuk’s eyes gleamed as he reached out. Kang Yi-chae, caught in the middle, widened his eyes in surprise.

“Come here!”

I swatted Yoo Hyuk’s hand away and grabbed Kang Yi-chae, shoving him back.

“Huh?”

I gave Kang Yi-chae a look telling him to back off, and he complied without complaint, his expression slightly sullen. There was no need for any of my members to get caught up with someone like that.
Besides, I could handle it all on my own.

“Hey.”
“…What? Hey?”
“Scared?”
“…!”
“If you’re so upset, why didn’t you write down first place yourself? Getting slapped in Jongno and taking it out at the Han River—what’s that about?”

Yoo Hyuk took the hit and his mouth just flapped uselessly.
I considered pushing him a bit further, but this was enough for now. All eyes around us had turned our way. It was exactly what I’d intended, and I was satisfied.
The worse the relationship between The Dun and Today looked, the better. I hadn’t expected Today to fan the flames like this, but it worked out.
This bastard Yoo Hyuk is actually more useful than I thought.
Stupid as he is.

“…You, you…!”

He seemed surprised that a junior so far beneath him would speak informally, and he struggled to continue, but I didn’t miss the opening.

“Well then, thank you for your time. We need to get ready for our stage.”
“Hey, hey…. Aren’t you going to stand there?!”

I ignored him, grabbed Kang Yi-chae, and walked away briskly. As always, I expected Kang Yi-chae to grin and tease me, but he was silent.
I glanced at him, wondering if he’d taken a hit somewhere earlier.

“Why? Did I hit something?”
“No….”

Kang Yi-chae narrowed his eyes and looked at me. Then he shrugged and walked ahead.
I wondered what was wrong with him, but I had no idea.
Must be going through puberty.
I was about to follow when Kang Yi-chae suddenly spun around.

“What are you doing dawdling there, hyung?”
“….”
“We need to get ready.”

Then he flashed a brilliant smile, teeth gleaming.

***

Kim Hee-young surveyed the atmosphere on the filming set.
What had started as comedy and loosened the mood was now adding extra broadcast segments, and the tension bristled like quills.
Beneath the courteous exchanges and artificially painted smiles lay endless vigilance. The viewers would sense it too.

‘This really is a minefield….’

Once the broadcast aired, Kim Hee-young would have a long road ahead. She’d face every curse imaginable from the fandoms.
But it was an unavoidable choice. No matter how much people spoke of harmony these days, the broadcasting industry survived by igniting controversy—real or fabricated—to capture attention and stay alive. Perhaps all she’d ever learned was this very thing.

Kim Hee-young’s gaze drifted toward Seo Ho-yoon. Among the rookies who were either trembling with nervousness or dripping with false bravado, he alone remained composed.

‘Seo Ho-yoon… what exactly is he?’

All the participants wore microphones as standard. So the casual speech I’d directed at Yoo Hyuk earlier had been captured. If there’d been any additional recording around, The Dun would be finished due to the character controversy by now. So why wasn’t he worried?

‘Is he from money? Does he have something to rely on?’

Even as Kim Hee-young thought this, she couldn’t tear her curiosity away from Seo Ho-yoon.
If things went well, it could make for compelling footage. But did she really need to push such a young kid into the fire? Kim Hee-young felt a twinge of doubt.

“PD.”
“Ah, yes.”
“The first mission stage will begin shortly. The rest will watch from the waiting room.”
“Got it. Um….”

Kim Hee-young, who had been lost in thought while listening to the Assistant Director explain the upcoming schedule and stage, suddenly opened her mouth.

“Today was supposed to be last, right?”
“Yes.”
“Change it to The Dun. Put Today right before them instead.”
“Huh? But… the investors and Today’s fans won’t just sit still about this.”
“Are they going to fire me over one order change? It won’t even show on broadcast anyway.”

Kim Hee-young lowered her gaze. There were plenty of groups with more recognition than The Dun. But still….

“When Today performs, focus the camera on The Dun’s reactions. When The Dun performs, film Today.”
“PD, that means….”
“Yes.”

I’m sorry.
Kim Hee-young had ultimately pushed these kids—barely in their early twenties—into hell.
Kim Hee-young ultimately pushed mere children, barely in their early twenties, into hell.

“Let’s create a confrontation between the two of us.”

I have no intention of being quietly swayed by the agency.
She had no intention of meekly bowing to the entertainment agency’s whims.

***

“yes?”
“Excuse me?”

After hearing that the order had changed, Kim Seong-hyun’s voice stuttered in confusion. I thought it was my first time and was just getting ready to go. The camera focused on that surprised face.
Upon hearing that the order had been changed, Kim Sung-hyun’s voice stammered in confusion. He’d been preparing to go on first. The camera immediately zeroed in on his startled expression.
I let out a hollow laugh from where I sat behind him.

“The filming got a little messy, so that’s how it turned out. It’s after Today.”
“The filming got a bit tangled up, so it ended up this way. We’re after Today.”
“Yes, I understand.”
“You can prepare for it, right?”
“Yes. It’s not being moved up.”

I said those words on purpose.
I said that on purpose.

“Tongue, bro. How should I do this?”
“H-hey, Hyung. What do we do about this?”

Seong Ji-won suddenly stood up.

“I’m telling you to practice more.”
“We practice more.”
“Right, that makes sense.”
“In that case, Kang Yi-chae, come here. Something about your part doesn’t quite fit.”

Kang Yi-chae was taken as a scapegoat. Everyone turned their heads with a look that said, ‘It’s okay if it’s just me.’
Kang Yi-chae was seized as the sacrificial lamb. Everyone turned their heads away with expressions that said, ‘as long as it’s not me.’
While Kang Yi-chae was being tormented by Sung Ji-won, Nightmare’s stage began.

[Don’t go, our party starts here]

Although the lyrics were a bit old-fashioned, the stage itself was well-decorated and not bad. Perhaps because they are all young, the concept of younger men telling them not to go home was expressed well in a cool and refreshing way.

“You’re doing great.”
“They’re doing well.”

Even while the rest of the members were busy reacting, I glanced at the camera focusing on The Dawn.

‘It was Kim Hee-young’s doing.’

Change the order. It had a huge impact on the stage. It was not for nothing that the most popular idols were postponed at Music Bank or the year-end music awards.
She changed the order. That had an enormous impact on the stage. It wasn’t for nothing that the most popular idols at Music Bank and the Year-End Music Awards were being pushed to the back.
Even viewers who started watching from the middle would see this time slot. This was also an intention to capture the attention of as many viewers as possible, no matter what.
The same applied to the competition program.

In terms of popularity, we would have been second or third at most. However, in this situation, if The Dawn went on stage for the fifth and final time, they would be criticized by the Today fandom, and it was clear that they would be dusted down by the rest of the fandom.
In terms of recognition, we would have ranked at best second or third. But in this situation, having The Dun perform fifth—last—was guaranteed to earn us curses from Today’s fanbase, and we’d be torn to shreds by the rest of the fandom as well.

‘There is actually someone else who manipulates it.’

Kim Hee-young must have expected that, but she decided to throw us into the fire pit.
Kim Hee-young must have anticipated all of this before deciding to throw us into the fire.

“Today’s seniors are coming on stage.”

Jeong Da-jun muttered. Seong Ji-won’s eyes suddenly stopped pressuring Kang Yi-chae and he looked at the stage, and his eyes were extremely serious.
Jung Da-jun muttered under his breath. Sung Ji-won had stopped pressing Kang Yi-chae and now stared at the stage, his gaze infinitely serious.

The beat of White Cherry, a hit song everyone knows, played. The arrangement was adjusted to the man’s height. The concept of The Little Mermaid, which everyone knows, also fit very well.
A hit song everyone knew—White Cherry’s beat flowed out. The arrangement was simply adjusted to a male key. The mermaid princess concept, something everyone would recognize, suited them perfectly.
How was Today’s skill level?

[Right okay,

The Dawn members all quietly stared at the stage.
The Dun members all watched the stage in complete silence, their eyes boring through it.
Brilliant lighting, pyrotechnics bursting across the stage, swirling flower petals, and a set built with money poured in without restraint.

“I’m moving.”
“We’re moving.”

The camera turned off, and we walked down the dark hallway behind the stage in silence.
The camera cut off, and we walked silently down the dark hallway behind the stage.

“Hey, did you see it?”
“Hey, you see that?”
“See what.”

Yuhyuk chuckled. Come to think of it, their clothes were luxurious from head to toe. Moreover, the exciting beats and set composition were honestly so spectacular that anyone who saw them would drop their jaw. This is the financial power of the so-called large entertainment companies.

“Oh, I’m sorry. You guys are such a shitty agency that you don’t have any push like this, right? Do you have a practice room?”
“Oh, sorry. Your agency’s so pathetic you don’t get any push like this, huh? Do you guys even have a practice room?”

Seonghyun Kim was moved and took a step forward. Kim Seong-hyun, who fell for Yu-hyeok’s provocation, glared quietly.
Kim Sung-hyun surged forward with emotion. He’d fallen straight for Yoo Hyuk’s provocation, his gaze turning cold and measured.
I grabbed the back of Kim Sung-hyun’s neck and pulled him backward. He stumbled back with a startled sound.

“Honestly, I don’t have the courage to rub it.”
“Honestly, I can’t even bring myself to compete against you.”
“Finally getting it?”
“Because your skills are so terrible.”

The Today members’ skills were not bad. The stage wasn’t bad either. Perhaps because I spent money on it, it seemed like it would look pretty on camera.
Today’s members weren’t lacking in skill. Their stage presence was solid too. With enough money thrown at it, they’d probably look decent enough on camera.
But what’s unfortunate is that these guys…

Tiring!

I was going to do just that, but I stopped laughing when I saw the options.

[Option
[Choice Options
-I’m sorry, senior☆ Please try harder.
-Even if you spoon-feed it to them, they can’t swallow it, oh, well~done~

Finally, a very polite and common-sense option, as I would normally say, appeared, but I had no intention of choosing it.

“It’s really unfortunate that even if I scooped up food for him, he couldn’t eat it.”
“Even if you spoon-feed it to them, they can’t swallow it. It’s really unfortunate, you know.”

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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