The Trashy PD Has To Survive as an Idol - Chapter 244

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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244

Viewer interest in a program rarely sustains itself for long. That’s why each episode must introduce fresh elements through diverse subject matter, formats, and cast members.
Parenting variety shows faced particular challenges in this regard.
While featuring fixed guest appearances made sense for the children’s sake, maintaining viewership ratings demanded a constant infusion of novelty.
Han Se-eun, ten years old, and Han Jae-eun, eight years old, had been appearing on “Chaotic Family Diary” for a year now, along with their youngest sibling Han Seol, just twenty months old.
Notably, Han Se-eun had already grasped the mechanics of broadcast entertainment.

“Why do you like Uncle Ho-yoon?”

During a brief interview conducted with parental supervision, Han Se-eun answered the production staff’s question with remarkable clarity.

“Because of his face.”

Han Se-eun, who demurely added that her mother always said good looks were the best thing, counted on her fingers as she continued.

“And because he calls himself ‘mister.'”

The Main Writer found herself nodding in agreement without realizing it.
Most guests who had appeared thus far introduced themselves to the children as “oppa,” “hyung,” “noona,” or “unni”—or, going a step further, “uncle” or “auntie.” Yet to young children, weren’t all adults simply “mister” or “missus”?
The Main Writer, who had assumed Seo Ho-yoon appeared because he was from the same group as Kim Sung-hyun and boasted the highest recognition among them, was surprised by how well he understood children’s instincts.

“Do you know who I am~?”
“…Um.”

In fact, beyond the matter of titles, guests frequently made another mistake.
They would ask the children if they knew who they were.
Unless one was Pororo, the children’s president, such a question would fall completely flat.
Once, an idol guest had performed their own song and dance. Afterward, Han Jae-eun, the second child, burst into tears.

“Why, why are you crying?!”
“Wahhh, …I’m, I’m scared.”

Since “Chaotic Family Diary” prioritized the children’s emotional well-being above all else, self-promotion in front of the children was banned from that day forward. Instead, the production crew promised to ensure sufficient promotional exposure through editing.

“Uncle, I can’t do this.”
“Oh, I’ll do it for you.”

That’s why Seo Ho-yoon was the perfectly ideal cast member.
After wrapping up filming and securing satisfying scenes, the PDs quickly released a preview video.

[Title: Chaotic Family Diary The Dun—why is it so funny the first time I’m watching?

Saying this after watching the Chaotic Family Diary variety show preview yesterday
I’ve always found Chaotic Family Diary cute, but lately it feels like it’s just for promoting guests, so I didn’t really like it
The guests are all working hard, but… the kids seem burdened by it haha
It’s always edited from such an adult perspective.. and the guests just seem to want to see how cute the kids are and leave

So I heard Kim Sung-hyun appeared on Household King this time, so I decided to check it out hahahaha.
This is totally worth posting lolololol

Is this what a K-son-in-law is.. no wait, he has such sharp features and gives off this vibe like he’d only drink Evian while wearing a black shirt, so how can he be so gentle?
It’s nice to see that the kids like it.

The second and third kids seemed to get close quickly, but the oldest, Se-eun, has been shy lately, so they seemed awkward and I was a bit disappointed
But then Seo Ho-yoon appears in the preview video
Maybe it’s because he got popular from Perfect Singer
Yeah~ I thought it was just promotion, but…

But then…
Se-eun really loves Seo Ho-yoon

Ho-yoon: (entering) Hello~
Se-eun: Oh…

Oh… Se-eun, you’re killing me lol
So this was our 10-year-old Se-eun’s taste..
She was staring intensely from the side…

Se-eun: (Staaaaring)
Ho-yoon: (?)
Se-eun: (Staaaaring)
Ho-yoon: (…??)
Se-eun: You’re quite handsome.
Ho-yoon: Ah… thank you… haha
Se-eun: That’s not a polite lie.
Ho-yoon: You certainly have a way with words.

Hahahaha so freaking hilarious hahahaha
Look at you using informal speech, ugh hahahaha

└Remark: “I thought it was best that my mom was good-looking”… Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha the moment the mother’s early education shines hahaha Se-eun is really bright and cuteㅠㅠ
└Our Se-eun… didn’t care when Joo Woo-sung came before…
└└Joo Woo-sung 0-1 This is so funny
The second Jae-eun really liked Joo Woo-sung so much… this firm preference lol.

[Title: Seo Ho-yoon confidently claimed to be an expert in raising 10-year-olds

He really does seem to be an expert in raising 10-year-olds
Seo Ho-yoon has that vibe… like that cool uncle you occasionally see during holidays… the uncle who acts annoyed but when the kids cling to him excitedly, he ends up playing with them so much… that kind of material..

But Seo Ho-yoon… you haven’t experienced infants, have you…
They’re like animals living in the jungle…

He was having a good conversation with Se-eun when Jae-eun, who was sitting quietly on the sofa, suddenly bolted out of nowhere—first shock

Ho-yoon: Wait, why are you running off?!

Then the youngest Seol came and hugged him, and he got awkward and didn’t know what to do, standing there fidgeting, and she started crying—second shock

Ho-yoon: (flustered) Would you like me to… sing a song?
Hyun-sung: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha (bursting out laughing)

Kim Sung-hyun is laughing so hard next to me, ah hahahahahaha
Like a baby would stop crying from hearing a song~~~

└Why was he so confident from the start anyway
“Seo Ho-yoon looks exactly like my uncle when he was a bachelor… He said every time I cried, he wanted to cry too lolol”
“Actually, at around 10 years old, communication is totally possible, so there’s no problem lol. It’s just that our second daughter Jae-eun is such a chatterbox lol.”

The preview reactions were quite favorable as the situation unfolded without feeling stale. The production crew strategically released several more clips on YouTube at just the right moment.
Then a longtime viewer of “Chaotic Family Diary” and a Noeul fan compiled it and posted it to the community.

[Title: Eldest Se-eun & Seo Ho-yoon Conversation Highlights Compilation

What is this combination even
It’s so funny I made this

1. Eldest Se-eun being Eldest Se-eun

(During a casual chat
Got closer with Se-eun so dropped formalities)
Se-eun: I had a boyfriend before.
Ho-yoon: Yeah, I see. Pretty mature for your age.
Se-eun: But I got a new boyfriend recently.
Ho-yoon: …You ended things with your previous boyfriend first, right?
Se-eun: …
Ho-yoon: …
Se-eun: Hehe.
Ho-yoon: (bewildered) Kids these days are like this?

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Se-eun, I was surprised too… but Seo Ho-yoon’s “kids these days” comment was absolutely shocking
He totally gave off old man vibes

2. Eldest Se-eun curious about the idol’s love life

(Confirmed that Se-eun properly sorted out her dating situation)
Se-eun: Uncle, don’t you have a girlfriend?
Ho-yoon: No. I don’t date.
Se-eun: Really? (sympathetically)…Even with a face like that?
Ho-yoon: (bewildered x2222) My face?
Hyun-sung: (laughing breathlessly) Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

I’m dying right next to Kim Sung-hyun lol

3. Ho-yoon Asks for Some Editing

(Seo Ho-yoon returned after secretly kicking Kim Sung-hyun, who was laughing like a madman, away from the others)
Ho-yoon: It’s fine. I’m an idol, after all…
Se-eun: Huh??
Ho-yoon: There are fans who like me.
Se-eun: (Wait, what?) Uncle, are you dating your fans??
Ho-yoon: (Completely bewildered) If we edit this, it’ll still be broadcastable, right?

Hahahahahaha I’m dying, I’m laughing so hard my jaw hurts hahahaha
You never know where kids are gonna bounce off to lol

└Seo Ho-yoon looking this flustered is seriously rare
Lol, he looks so exhausted by that little kid, it’s hilarious.
It’s been so long since Se-eun has been chatting away so comfortably without being shy around people like this lol
└└Queen Se-eun liking Seo Ho-yoon’s face is so cute]

Seo Ho-yoon, who happened to be reading that post, felt a slight sense of defeat wash over him.

‘I thought I had experience raising Seo Ho-jin…’

That experience had left no trace whatsoever.
He had only just realized now, more than a decade later, that raising Seo Ho-jin had been the easiest difficulty level because he always listened well and behaved obediently in front of his older brother.

***

“Kids these days aren’t easy.”

Of course, I knew that Seo Ho-jin had acted unusually mature for his age.
After my shooting wrapped up, Han Se-eun, the eldest, had told me this while eating ice cream.

“Uncle, I think you’re going to have a younger sibling.”
“Huh?”

It was something the members didn’t know, let alone the company or even the fans.

“A sibling with a big age gap.”

I just laughed instead of answering.

‘She’s smart, Se-eun.’

After skimming through the comments on the pre-release video, I found myself thinking of Seo Ho-jin for no particular reason and reached out to him.

[Me: How were you so well-behaved when you were young?]
[Seo Ho-jin: Huh?]
[Seo Ho-jin: I’m still calm right now?? Haha]

This is the guy who hit his brother with a bouquet of flowers?
I brushed off my brother’s nonsense and was about to focus on preparing for the next round of Perfect Singer when a message preview popped into my mind.

Sung Ji-won: I’ve confirmed my appearance on a variety show haha
[Sung Ji-won: I’ll let you know once the Europe departure date is set!!]
[Me: Thanks]

Everything’s running smoothly.
Just as I thought I could finally relax,

[Kang Yi-chae: So Ho-yoon hyung gets a solo then?]

“….”

I quietly closed the messaging app.
Trusting that someone would cover for me instead.

‘There are three of them… at least one of them will stop it.’

Since my collapse, the members had never left me alone. They treated me as if I were suffering from some incurable disease.

‘I suppose there’s no helping it for now.’

I believed that with a little more time, things would settle down.
More importantly, I needed to make the most of the remaining time this year and use it as a stepping stone for next year’s plans.
Kang Yi-chae was already serving as a mentor on Rising Rookies as our vanguard, steadily building his recognition.
The guy seemed to possess an innate musical talent, but in reality, he had dozens of notebooks filled with his own ideas and lyrics, and there wasn’t a single day he skipped working on music.

As Rising Rookies aired, those aspects of him became more prominent, and simultaneously, the credibility of what Kang Yi-chae said to the trainees increased.
Some of the trainees even began to look up to Kang Yi-chae.

“Kang Yi-chae told me my voice is better suited for lower notes than high ones, and when I actually tried it, the response was really good!”
“Yi-chae is very strict, but… if you listen well to what he says, even sleeping you’ll wake up with results….”
“Isn’t he just cool??”

They must have undergone some kind of collective brainwashing.
Kang Yi-chae himself, the subject of all this praise, acted like it was nothing special.

‘He’s certainly talented, though.’

Anyway, the next wave was Kim Sung-hyun and me.
Kim Sung-hyun, who had long dominated terrestrial broadcasting’s weekend slots and appeared on “Chaotic Family Diary,” which was called a national variety show, would build name recognition across diverse age groups, while I, appearing on “Perfect Singer” scheduled in Sunday’s prime time slot, would secure long-term dominance and reconsider evaluations of my abilities while raising awareness of The Dun even further.

So far, everything was proceeding smoothly.
All three broadcasts were even being distributed on OTT platforms that serviced overseas markets, so I’d expected interest from abroad, but according to Lee Ji-hyun’s analysis, the domestic response was surprisingly stronger.

‘This far was targeting both overseas and domestic simultaneously.’

And the second wave consisted of Sung Ji-won and Jung Da-jun.
The maknae’s program was already confirmed, and Sung Ji-won was slightly uncertain.
But since he was our main vocalist that The Dun proudly showcased, I wanted to highlight his technical abilities, so I wrote down “Restart”—a month-long overseas stay with busking in various locations—as our hope.
It hadn’t done well overseas, but it had become enormously popular domestically.
After finishing my thoughts on each member’s individual schedules, I stood up abruptly.

“Let’s go practice for the competition.”

As I opened the door and stepped into the living room, a strange smell wafted from the kitchen along with wisps of gray smoke.

“Oh!! I was just about to call you!”

I quickly grabbed the fire extinguisher and rushed to the kitchen, where Jung Da-jun in a yellow apron stood holding a ladle, staring at me with startled eyes.

“Do you want to try some?!”
“No.”

I left Jung Da-jun alone, soot smudged across his cheeks and completely unbothered, and first checked the induction cooktop.
The smell was definitely burnt meat, but what appeared to be strawberries was melting grotesquely like lava on the frying pan.
I turned off the induction and switched on the ventilation fan, then turned toward Jung Da-jun and asked.

“Is this strawberry? What are you planning to do with it?”
“It’s sweet potato and strawberry pasta.”

Setting aside how bizarre the menu was.

“But why is there smoke?”
“I’m… not really sure either…?”

This looked like the kind of dish that would make even Min Ji-heon—a man who’d drink lye water before eating something questionable—shake his head and flee.
Jung Da-jun simply laughed innocently.

“Yeah.”

I mirrored his smile and turned away.

“Eat well.”
“W-wait! I made this so you’d eat before practice!”

I had no intention of eating it.
I brushed off his clinging and headed for the door when Jung Da-jun’s phone rang.
After confirming the caller was the Road Manager, Jung Da-jun switched to speaker phone.

“Yes!!”
[Ah, Da-jun. Are you at the dormitory right now?]
“Yes! Ho-yoon is here with me!”
[Ah, I see… Well. I called because there’s something urgent I need to tell you.]

His voice carried a note of discomfort.
I felt that same ominous premonition I’d had when facing the sweet potato and strawberry pasta.

[Da-jun, the cooking variety show has been cancelled.]
“…What?”

The maknae, who had been beaming with anticipation just moments before, froze in shock.
I gestured for him to hand me the phone.

“Why?”
[Ah, it’s Ho-yoon. Um… he asked if we could push back the schedule a bit.]
“That’s why I’m asking why.”
[Well… it’s just that…]

The Road Manager, who had been hemming and hawing for a while, finally offered an answer.

[They… they said another idol they were discussing casting for only has that time slot available…]
“…”

In other words, we’d been pushed aside by the agency and bullied by the broadcasting station.

‘I’d forgotten because things have been going well lately and we’ve been getting decent casting offers.’

Our Dae Pa-sung is a big shot in the entertainment industry.
Moments like these really exposed how powerless our agency was.

[Sigh, we did lodge a protest on our end… I’m sorry it turned out this way. The production team is suggesting maybe a mid-year appearance next year instead.]
“Mid-year next year…”

Maybe our CEO and their production team needed to be spun in a salad spinner like wet vegetables until they regained their senses.
The Road Manager repeated his apologies a few more times before hanging up.
It wasn’t his fault, but if I just sat around waiting for the management team to take action, the water would keep rising while I missed every chance to row.
I popped a cherry tomato from the dining table into my mouth while organizing my thoughts, and noticed the Maknae had been unusually quiet.

“Hey.”

Wondering if his spirits had been crushed, I lowered my head to check his face.

“Jung Da-jun—.”
“Ugh, this is frustrating.”

Despite his agitated tone, Jung Da-jun remained composed.
The Maknae grumbled and set down his ladle.

“So I don’t need to prepare this then? I went through all the trouble of developing sweet potato and strawberry pasta, and now it’s pointless.”

It was supposed to be pointless anyway.
I shrugged and sprawled out on the sofa, and Jung Da-jun, who’d grabbed the entire bowl of cherry tomatoes, followed me over and sat down beside me.

“Brother, brother. Still, wouldn’t it be better to appear even if we delay the schedule??”
“No.”

I cut it off decisively.

“You won’t be at that level next year anyway, so why bother.”
“…Huh?”

As a former PD, I understood the impulse to cast someone with more buzz instead.
But being irritated was a separate matter entirely.
I’d researched where to send the Maknae’s first solo schedule, reached out to contacts, cleared the entire calendar, and Jung Da-jun had even personally prepared food – though whether it would be edible remained a mystery – only for them to suddenly cancel the appearance.
And on top of that, they had the audacity to say they’d use him later as if they were doing him some favor?

‘Who do they think they are to treat someone like this.’

“What’s wrong? Why are you talking so mysteriously?”

Instead of grinding my teeth, I bit into a cherry tomato with a crisp snap, and Jung Da-jun stared at me with sparkling, eager eyes.
I pulled out my phone and found the contact information for the documentary PD I’d met at the Berlin K-pop concert.

‘Should I call, or not.’

I hadn’t left myself without a Plan B.
If the solo schedule fell through, I could simply move up a group variety show appearance instead.
The common trait among celebrities the public favors is that they’re meticulous about self-management while being casual with others, and in certain aspects, they exude a slightly scatterbrained charm.
It’s like some kind of spell – ‘simple yet glamorous’ – but that’s what makes them special, I suppose.
Or,

‘They transcend four dimensions and operate on some 16-dimensional level, leaving a powerful impression on people.’

And we have our own naturally 16-dimensional, hilariously clumsy Jung Da-jun, don’t we.
I called out to our team’s Maknae affectionately.

“Da-jun.”
“…!!”

Sensing something ominous in my expression, Jung Da-jun’s face went serious in an instant, and he began slowly inching his rear backward.
I quickly grabbed the apron strings he was wearing so he couldn’t escape.

“Why, why? What’s going on?”
“Our maknae.”

I held onto the flustered Jung Da-jun and leisurely straightened out his wrinkled apron.

“What is it really?!”

I asked gently, mimicking my kind older brother.

“You don’t get seasick, do you?”
“…Huh?”

Why.
This is quite important.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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