The Boss Wants to Die - Chapter 39

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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The Boss wants to die.
39
A twisted heart squeezed my soul in pain, despairing at his persuasion.
‘If a soul dwells within a monster, that soul must already be a monster.’
Especially one that remembers nothing of its human days.
“Then why did you make me drink your blood in the first place?”
I lamented in agony.
“I can’t get my head straight because of that single drop.”
“I did it because I thought you might fall apart at any moment if I didn’t.”
Aktu lifted his upper body with only the strength of his abdomen and arms.
Muscles that had gone slack suddenly flexed with power, pulling me upright in one motion.
I, who had been perched atop him, slipped down and found myself cradled against his chest.
Perhaps thinking I had calmed somewhat, Aktu asked as if to clear the air.
“Why are you suddenly like this? You’ve been indifferent to my blood until now.”
I deliberated on how to answer, then quickly concluded that I should hide most of it.
“I suppose instinct awakened as I kept drinking blood. What do you expect? It’s the nature of a monster.”
Aktu studied me quietly.
I felt a strange tension grip my muscles taut.
Contrary to my fears, he maintained his silence with narrowed eyes, then asked something else without pressing further.
“You seem sound now, at least. That’s a relief.”
“Sound? What do you mean, sound?”
I lifted my bowed head quickly.
“If I’m in my right mind, can I drink your blood? More of it?”
I still couldn’t shake my lingering desire for blood.
Aktu gently cut off my opportunistic attempt.
“Consuming it indiscriminately will harm your body.”
‘For someone who usually goes around laughing aimlessly.’
Unable to hide my discontent, I pulled myself away from the bench.
My tolerance had grown enough to endure it, but it was still difficult to bear.
Aktu’s scent of blood.
‘It’s fortunate my stomach is full. If I’d drunk Aktu’s blood from the start, I wouldn’t have been able to restrain myself.’
It struck me how Aktu had released me without hesitation just now.
I’d expected him to keep insisting I drink his blood to the bitter end.
‘Did he let me go because he knew?’
I studied him as if reading his heart.
He was fastening the buttons of his shirt, which I had deliberately torn open.
‘That can’t be it.’
I abandoned the pointless thought and opened my Quest Window.
A single drop of Aktu’s blood didn’t count as Blood Drain, so I still had six uses remaining.
‘What should I do?’
I reached a conclusion quickly.
“By tomorrow, I should be able to obtain a Ruby as red as blood. I’ve already figured out which Information Guild to use. I need to find Erith alone.”
Aktu, having neatly put himself together even down to his hair, furrowed his brow.
“You’re planning to use Blood Drain again?”
“Yes.”
I recalled that the Buff granted by Aktu’s blood had been “euphoria,” and I relaxed the taut muscles of my legs.
I was set on leaving this place quickly.
“Iroun.”
Aktu called me to a stop, having guessed my thoughts.
I ignored his wordless warning and jumped high from my seat, climbing onto a tree branch.
“If you try to stop me with the Leash, I won’t let it go.”
“I know what you’re thinking. Don’t do it. All right?”
Aktu begged me to reconsider, his anxiety showing.
There was only one circumstance in which calm-natured Aktu became anxious.
When I was about to go down a wrong path.
When he feared he couldn’t stop me from falling into danger.
‘Anyone watching would think I was walking into a trap.’
He reached out, unable to hide his worry.
So tall was he that his fingertips brushed the tips of my feet as I sat on the low branch.
“Don’t go.”
“You have no right to meddle in my affairs.”
“You’re my boyfriend, aren’t you?”
I let out a quiet laugh.
“The only person who thinks you’re my boyfriend is you.”
……
“Go to the Inn first. Don’t wait here. It gets cold when the sun sets. Understand?”
I left without hesitation, wandering like a madwoman in search of prey.
‘The Buff doesn’t just affect abilities—it influences mood and emotion too.’
A Buff granted to a Boss Monster who was already supreme.
It was only a fleeting feeling.
Like drinking alcohol, or catching the scent of something pleasant, or indulging in an extreme sport.
It fades quickly, but in that moment, it feels undeniably real.
Such invaluable relief moved me to something close to gratitude.
Now I too could briefly forget reality whenever I wished.
It was a function I’d desperately wanted.
Ak Sin had no poison or alcohol that worked on him, so he’d had to endure those long years brutishly, with a mind cruelly clear.
Nights without worry, mornings without torment.
I needed some drive to move this monster’s body with a lightened heart.
Just as Aktu drank for reasons of his own, I needed this escape.
I’d craved it desperately.
Was there any reason not to desire it?
People go mad if they can’t rest.
I was done with those years of fearing I’d lose my mind.
I lifted my nose and picked out the scent of blood drifting through the air.
Blood’s Buffs were varied, but blood that affected emotion and mood had its own signature.
It didn’t glow with the bright silver radiance of Aktu’s blood, but it sparkled like a pale firefly.
I chased those glimmers.
Aktu’s warning had long since sunk beneath the surface of my consciousness.
I seduced Players recklessly and dragged them into shadowed alleys.
Those who resisted ought to have been released, but I was desperate.
“Let go! I said let go!”
I pulled the struggling arm toward me and bit down like a crazed beast.
It was thoroughly impulsive.
When tainted blood poured into my mouth, my mood crashed in a way that surprised me.
Rage, resentment, and revulsion tangled together and battered me senseless.
‘I’ve gone too far.’
That thought struck me.
Looking at the Player writhing with my fangs in their forearm, my disgust deepened.
‘You’ve gone too far, Iroun.’
I felt nauseated at myself, gasping and eager to fall just a little to ease my suffering.
The emotional Buff’s effect was minimal.
Just as alcohol cannot erase fundamental sorrow, neither can blood.
When I tried to feel good, resistance rose within me.
‘You drank the blood of someone you despise without hesitation, and now you want to feel better? Without even guilt?’
Then came a terrible feeling.
“Ahhh!”
The innocent Player shrieked as they tore.
That vivid agony pierced my chest.
Thump.
My heart, startled by the crime I’d committed, collapsed within me.
I abandoned my plan to drain them mercilessly and awkwardly withdrew my fangs.
My hands trembled at that horrible scream.
It was the same desperate cry as my own screams from those days trapped in the Demonic Hall, attacked without understanding why.
I looked down at the Player’s bitten forearm.
Blood wept from the punctured flesh like tears.
It should have looked painful, yet it looked delicious.
Saliva pooled beneath my fangs.
‘How terrible.’
A savage shock raked across my soul with all its force and passed through.
I stood frozen and felt that pain.
‘Horrifying!’
The Player found an opening and yanked his arm free, tumbling backward onto his backside.
“M-monster!”
He pointed at me, his voice dripping with revulsion.
“You’re a monster!”
I should have stopped his mouth from spouting such words, but I couldn’t find the will.
They weren’t lies.
He was right.
I was a monster.
I was the one who deserved punishment.
So I simply stood there.
‘Is that why you stopped me, Aktu?’
I blinked stupidly.
The Player watched me go quiet, seizing the moment to scramble to his feet and flee.
He stumbled twice escaping the alley, but crawled forward all the same.
He couldn’t bear to spend another second in my presence.
I understood him. I would have felt the same.
As I watched his retreating figure disappear, I lowered my gaze to the stagnant, putrid water pooling at my feet.
A monster stood there in grotesque form—blood smeared across its lips, crimson eyes gleaming.
“Ha… ha……”
Laughter spilled out.
After laughing once, twice, three times in broken gasps, my face twisted.
Grotesque as the putrid water beneath me.
Hating the sight of myself reflected so clearly, I kicked at the surface.
Rotten water splashed across my body and dress.
A foul stench wafted from every direction.
It smelled like the reek of my own soul—shameful and suffocating.
“I am……”
I buried my face in my hands.
The wretchedness, the despicability of it all—I couldn’t bear it.
“I was exhausted, and so……”
I never meant to hurt him.
That wasn’t my intention. I just wanted to rest, that’s all.
I wasn’t in my right mind. I couldn’t help it.
‘Couldn’t help it?’
“Ha… ha… ha……!”
How many people had I killed with excuses like that?
How long could I keep making these justifications?
I’d become so indistinguishable from Ak Sin that I could no longer claim this guilt wasn’t mine.
Hadn’t I wanted this?
I’d hurt an innocent person.
And I didn’t know how many more I would hurt before this ended.
I was a defeated coward who’d surrendered, a monster from that moment onward.
And I would remain one, unless I died.
“Please. Someone kill me.”
Please.
Please……
“Kill me……”
“Iroun.”
A voice rang out suddenly.
Noble and sacred in tone.
Like an angel’s feather, bringing light to this filthy, sordid alley.
I turned around, my face streaked with tears.
Michael Iruber stood before me.
I had no idea how he’d found me.
I could only stare at him blankly.
“Do you need blood?”
“I……”
He would despise me.
I should say no.
First, I needed to control my expression…….
But nothing obeyed my will. My body felt shattered.
A cry of pain escaped me.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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