The Baby Raising A Devil - Chapter 186

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 186

I climbed into the carriage to head to the mansion and clasped both hands tightly together. My cold hands wouldn’t warm up no matter how much I rubbed them.

Throughout the entire carriage ride, only one thought circled through my mind.

‘What should I say.’

Would Father and my brothers believe me?

What should I explain to Lea, the employees, and my aunt?

‘Won’t my family suffer knowing that I’m the Baby Bird?’

Anxiety followed one after another.

I didn’t want to see Father’s face contort in pain like when I revealed that I was a regressor.

The temple targeting Mother and causing immeasurable wounds to my family – all of that happened because of me.

Because of that, Father lost his beloved wife, Henri became vulnerable to abuse because the mistress position was vacant, Isaac grew up without knowing a mother’s affection. Johan also couldn’t even show his pain while desperately struggling to rise up in a precarious household.

Lea lost the master she respected and couldn’t protect her only family, and my aunt had to send away her most beloved friend.

‘Mother…’

Mother said I was a strong child, but I’m actually not strong at all.

I simply couldn’t erase the guilt.

‘Is it okay to tell my family?’

What if they hate me?

What should I do if they’re happy about our reunion now, but deep down they think I’m the one who caused them to lose Mother?

‘Why was I born as the Child of the Evil God? Why was I born with the power that the temple covets?’

I couldn’t forgive myself for being the origin of this entire situation.

While I was agonizing, the carriage entered the mansion grounds. Soon the wheels stopped, and I took the coachman’s hand to get down from the carriage.

“Miss?”

The aide who was leaving the central courtyard spotted me and furrowed his brow.

“What brings you here so late at night?”

“Why are you still at the mansion yourself?”

“It’s the day of the Great Council. Plus, there are matters regarding the selection to discuss with His Excellency.”

“I see.”

The aide stared at me intently.

Whenever he looked at me with such a penetrating gaze, I felt like my inner thoughts would be completely exposed.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

When I stepped back and narrowed my eyes, the aide said,

“Because you seem to be having some naive thoughts again.”

“Naive?”

The aide nodded lightly and said,

“Miss.”

“Yes.”

“I’ve lived for over half a century and am now approaching a full century, yet even I have times when I cannot face the situation.”

“…What?”

“People, you see. In such times, they come to blame themselves. It’s a kind of defense mechanism.”

“….”

“When you catch a cold, you think it’s because you dressed too lightly; when you get beaten up somewhere, you think it’s because you went there; even something as trivial as getting pricked by a Rose Bush, you think it’s because you failed to manage it properly. Because it’s less unfair if it’s your fault. When in reality, it was just an accident that happened by chance.”

“…That’s strange.”

I said with my lips pouting.

I let out a hollow laugh.

“Even so. How can you immediately tell what I’m worrying about just from my expression.”

“Still though. How can you tell right away just from my expression that I’m worried about something.”

“I’m an Old Man who has lived well over half a century. I didn’t gain experience for free.”

“I’m an old man who has lived well over half a century. I didn’t gain this experience for free.”

“….”

“Blaming yourself is never a good habit.”

“Blaming yourself is never a good habit.”

“….”

“Things caused by others are no different from disasters. How do you avoid disasters? Even if you were swept up in a storm, instead of being unable to praise your admirable self for not collapsing, why do you criticize yourself? Why are you so merciless to yourself when you’re generous to others?”

“What others do to you is no different from a natural disaster. How do you avoid disasters? Even if you were swept up in a storm, you should be praising yourself for being remarkable enough not to collapse, yet why do you blame yourself instead? Why are you so merciless toward yourself when you’re so generous toward others?”

I opened my eyes wide.

Come to think of it, that was true.

I only praised others, never myself.

Even when my life was twisted by others’ malice and desires, I always endured well.

Even when my life was twisted by others’ malice and desires, I always endured well.

‘Good job, me!’

And so they even found out who I am.

When I giggled, he stroked my head with the face of a kind Old Man.

‘I lived well.’

Going through such hardships, I made good people like Butler my allies.

‘How admirable this is.’

My heart felt at ease.

“I’ll wait.”

Though it was past ten o’clock, the Mansion still had lights on.

I clenched my fists and entered the mansion.

The Head Butler who was guarding the Central Courtyard also asked with a puzzled expression.

“Little One.”

As I entered the courtyard, the servants who had been passing by carrying laundry and documents widened their eyes and approached me.

The head butler who was guarding the central courtyard also asked with a puzzled expression.

“Miss.”

“Where are Father and my brothers?”

“They are in the study.”

I nodded and headed to the study.

As I entered through the door, Father, Henri, and Isaac, who had been talking, stood up.

Isaac frowned and asked.

“What’s wrong? What is it? Huh? Did someone bother you? Did they?”

Isaac spun me around in circles and widened his eyes, saying “Did some bastard hurt you?!”

Henri also examined my expression.

“Selection candidates and their sponsors shouldn’t be able to leave without permission, so how did you get out?”

“The Emperor helped me. He must have thought it was because of Cecilia’s selection.”

“You mean it’s not about the selection?”

Even while talking with my brothers, I was looking at Father. Father quietly watched over me like that. He was giving me time to speak.

‘How could Mother close her eyes leaving Father and my brothers behind?’

Could she have confidently said she had no regrets leaving behind such a loving family?

How did the miracle of such a strong person being my mother happen to me?

“Father, I… I…”

I tried to think it was okay, that it would be okay, that it wasn’t my fault, but as soon as my mouth opened, my voice trembled.

Isaac and Henri looked at me with worried expressions.

“You see… I found a demon passage in the Imperial Palace. So I went to the past, I mean…”

That’s when it happened.

Bang─!!

The door opened and Johan walked in with large strides, his face stern.

“Eldest Brother?”

“Weren’t you supposed to be at the territory?”

Just as Isaac and Henri were asking, Johan suddenly pulled me into his arms.

“Elder Brother…?”

“…”

“What’s wrong?”

His body trembled faintly.

“I’m sorry.”

“…”

“I’m sorry.”

I was bewildered by Johan who kept apologizing, so I blinked and looked at Father in front of me.

Father’s expression, which had been frowning at Johan’s sudden appearance, changed very slowly.

Like ripples on calm water, he slowly crumbled. Like someone who had realized something.

‘Ah…’

I could understand without being told.

Though none of us three had spoken, I couldn’t help but understand the meaning of Johan’s apology and the reason Father’s expression had crumbled.

Johan gently held my cheek with trembling hands.

“Thank you for surviving safely and coming back to us.”

Tears kept leaking out.

Johan in my blurred vision resembled Mother remarkably.

“Little One.”

I thought I heard Mother’s voice from somewhere.

I usually thought of myself as someone who was very good with words. I thought I had mastered the art of speaking through all kinds of hardships, so I could speak well in any moment.

But when it came down to it, I was actually a very foolish person.

On such a joyful day, I was just a pitiful child who couldn’t say anything and could only cry loudly.

Johan smiled faintly as he watched me cry with my face twisted into a mess.

“There was something I definitely wanted to say when you were born.”

The tears pooled in Johan’s eyes rolled down his cheek and dropped.

“Nice to meet you.”

“…”

“I’ve been waiting a very long time for the day I’d meet you.”

“…”

“Baby Bird.”

Silence fell over the study.

Isaac and Henri were frozen, unable to say anything, and Father stared at me endlessly as if rooted to the ground.

Johan took something from his chest and handed it to Father.

“I’ve completed the confirmation. The day Leblaine was placed in front of the orphanage was January 7th. The day Mother and Baby Bird went missing, and a Temple Coin was placed inside the blanket.”

“…”

“It’s Baby Bird, Father.”

Father covered his eyes with one hand.

At this sight I had never seen before, I could only cry, and Henri and Isaac’s trembling eyes grew increasingly red.

“Don’t talk nonsense. That can’t be. How could Little One, why… how could…”

The moment Isaac muttered in a confused voice.

A very small voice flowed from between Father’s lips as he hung his head.

“Lisette.”

Wind blew through the open window. The curtain fluttered, and the frame on the study table fell over with a thud.

I saw a photograph of Mother smiling brightly.

Mother seemed to be saying something.

“See? You’re going to be happy. More than anything.”

─she said.

I rushed into Father’s arms, and Father embraced me.

All we could do after our reunion through hardship was the simple act of holding each other tightly without gaps, but it was okay.

Because our tears, heartbeats, and breaths were all saying it.

Thank you for coming back.

Thank you for waiting.

I was reunited with my family only in my fourth life.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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