Surviving the Assassin Academy as a Genius Professor - Chapter 91

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Episode 91
EP23 – The Hand (1)

I was once registered in the Guinness Book of World Records. As the person who lived the most boringly in the world.

Of course it was a lie, but it spoke to just how tedious my life had become. That didn’t change even after I possessed this game.

I’d wake, brew coffee, read domestic and international news, undergo physical training, conduct Illusion Magic research, eat, then train my mana control or practice the motions of the Colossus Soldier’s Sword without Activation. The movements of an unactivated hand.

And by the end of it all, I’d finally reached the point where I could even crack chestnuts.

Crack—!!!!

A shockwave that erupted with brutal force.
Practically a siege-weapon-grade chestnut.

In any case, there wasn’t really a reason for living so boringly. It was just my nature—I couldn’t find much enjoyment in anything.

Back then I’d pretended to enjoy things by copying what others did… but after I got cancer, my thinking changed. Rather than forcing myself to seem entertained, I decided to just live as someone who found nothing amusing.

Perhaps that’s why.

“Hey, hey. Did you see that?”

When I genuinely felt amusement, I’d sense a pinwheel spinning inside my heart.

“Oh, Zamryong Academy? That one?”

Just like now.

“…….”

We were on a bench in the Park.
I had a Fedora Hat pulled low over my face, relaxing, when the cadets beside me started chattering away.

“You saw it too? That was seriously insane.”
“I always thought she was some kind of thug, but after seeing that interview….”
“Grey? She’s actually pretty good?”
“Yeah, yeah. When she speaks, she’s articulate, and even when she was sparring with Croitz she didn’t back down….”
“Exactly. She must’ve been nervous.”
“If it were me in that situation, I wouldn’t know what to say and I’d just start stammering like ‘W-w-what the—!’ and cry….”
“Ha ha ha! Crazy.”
“But she had such composure it was satisfying to watch.”
“Hey, hey. The Illusion Magic was even more insane.”
“Really?”
“I specialize in Assassination Illusion Arts, right? I wondered why a first-year got selected as academy rep. But seeing her Illusion Magic, I just had to admit it. The level is incredibly high.”
“Ah. That’s why back in our dormitory, when everyone gathered to watch her Illusion Magic duel against Croitz, we all just—wow….”

The upper-year cadets went on talking for quite a while after that.
They had no choice.
This issue of the Assassination Daily News wasn’t simply a photoshoot of our junior. It symbolized an enormous window of opportunity opening up—one that could shape all of their futures and livelihoods.

“Hey, does that mean we could go to the Empire too…?”
“That rumor about the department opening recently? I hope so….”
“Right. They say assassins who go to the Empire get paid three or four times as much….”

The “Betting Table” is a national event, after all.

And Grey opened that door beautifully.
By presenting a national image of Hiaka’s assassins.

“We’re really making it now…….”

⋮

The excitement continued unabated after that.

The response to the Monthly Assassination Newspaper, barely a week after its release, began erupting across the entire world.

“Professor, professor…!”

In the living room of the Private Estate, Adel thrust Assassin Town at me. Normally I’d avoid checking such things—just curious what the kids think—but today I read it thoroughly.

“Every recommended post is about Grey!”

It really was.

Good reactions and bad ones alike.
Everything was about Grey.
I checked a few of them.

———

Hegen Chief ← Starfield Account Nuked LMAO

Kuen Chief ← Empire Business Wastewater Treatment Truck Terrorized LMAOOO

Glumi Chief ← Ghosted Court Appearance and Radio Silence LMAO Croitz saying he double-crossed them again and went to Hiaka? LMAOOOOOOO

Battalion Chief ← This ultra son-of-a-bitch suddenly caught a hearing on Croitz Royal Family Contempt charges LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
———

Of course, I had no idea if any of it was true. It was a post scraped from gossip floating around the Empire’s web.
But if half of it was true, that was enough.
Very satisfying indeed.

And then?

What kind of bastard is this.

———

(Photo of Grey’s face composite with the sun)
———

Hmm. I’ll give her credit.

———

Hello, this is the Spine Fairy speaking. The lowest price for spinal surgery is 300,000 Hiaka. The spinal surgery process begins with cutting open the back skin with a blade, then using forceps on both sides to hook the flesh in place, and driving a finger-sized scar-nail through the center of the spine using a hammer and chisel……
———

I straightened my hunched back.
Beneath it lay something far more intriguing.

———

……
———

It was a lengthy predictive piece.

Sales figures.

They were first tallied ten days after release.
The most watched metric of public interest—the “index of controversy.”

Ultimately, if popularity or impact truly exists, it must translate into money for the Assassination Daily News.
Otherwise it’s a phantom.
Take Rebecca’s appearance as a model in the Weekly Assassination Newspaper, for instance. The Royal Family and the Magic Department pushed hard, but the sales figures were unremarkable even for a weekly.
Yet this time…the department’s reaction was anything but ordinary.

‘How many copies is Grey actually selling?’

This determined immediate results, certainly.
But looking ahead, it would decide the scope of the stage Grey would command at the Betting Table.
Absolutely, we need strong numbers.

The all-time record for Assassination Daily News sales was 2.9 million copies, held by the youngest Cross Starlight Seat. (That person became both the youngest Starlight Seat in history and unified the fragmented sect, becoming a saint of the Holy Mother Church, and was the first to wear a bikini in the Assassination Daily News, but was revealed to be male immediately after publication……)

That figure was beyond dreaming.
The record for the past three years stood at 410,000 copies, and the gap to second place was substantial.

‘Curious. What will the number be?’

Everyone interested in Grey would be watching the sales figures. Adults love numbers, after all.
The prediction piece projected 200,000 copies, but that seemed unlikely.
The baseline for moderate success in the Monthly Assassination Newspaper is 50,000, and 100,000 is considered a blockbuster.
I was hoping for something ambitious—maybe 80,000 copies.

‘The sales announcement comes in two days. But it’s strange, really—turns out the Reconnaissance Starlight’s falsified time was actually helpful.’

In the end, for anything to succeed, one cannot ignore the importance of marketing.
The Monthly Assassination Newspaper featuring Grey’s substitute (presumably an amulet) was a massive hit within that falsified time, so we’ve reclaimed the marketing benefit that was stolen then.

‘Grateful, really.’

Perverse as that star may be.
Because she is a Starlight Seat that cannot be replaced.

So then, what is the protagonist of this entire affair doing right now?
A message arrived at just that moment.

– Grey: Professor

I looked at the Crystal Orb with cheerful anticipation.

– Grey: Can you save me? ㅠ
– Grey: ㅠㅠ

Grey had sent a cat emoticon.
The cat wore a tearful expression, both paws pressed together in supplication.

– Me: lol
– Me: Sounds like you’re swamped.
– Grey: If this keeps up Grey’s gonna die ㅠㅠ
– Me: How’s your schedule looking?
– Grey: Literally insane dude the department’s lost it
– Grey: Got called to the Royal Family five days ago had to cancel everything came back yesterday at dawn slept at 4am and this morning at 8 got dragged into the Magic Department promotional shoot for photos and just got back and now there’s another thing in 3 minutes ㅠ Zone 9 Habanero Necklace shoot
– Grey: I think I’m losing it for real ㅠㅠ
– Grey: If it’s gonna be like this just give me a rope to hang myself with
– Me: lol
– Me: Ask them for one of those necklaces instead
– Grey: Shut up ㅎㅎ ㅗ

Even hearing about it made me want to gag.
Was this the schedule of some wildly popular idol?
For someone like Grey, who was usually on the lazy side, it seemed like genuine torture.

– Me: Just manage it yourself
– Grey: Oh please save me don’t say that
– Grey: You can get me out of this can’t you ㅠ
– Grey: We have our second lesson today… huh??

I’d expected another emoticon, but this time it was a photo.
A picture of Grey, melancholy-faced, both hands clasped together pleadingly.

– Grey: Please… ㅠ
– Me: my bad

Then came a barrage of messages—something about being a traitor, about changing my contact name to Dantalion, about how I’d bear responsibility forever for the things I’d trained her to do (where on earth did she learn to argue like that?), and more in that vein—before the conversation died.

Meanwhile, someone might well ask a certain question.

How does an assassin gain fame?
Isn’t discretion supposed to be part of the job?
It was a question I myself had asked before diving into the game.

But once I actually played, I understood.

For one thing, assassins in this game weren’t just used like missiles.
Even if they performed actual assassinations, there was no problem.

1. Assassins can choose whether or not to make their assassination records public.

Take Elise, for example.
By all accounts, she possessed considerable assassination experience. Yet her portfolio was remarkably clean.
She’d never been caught. She simply hadn’t made her records public.
If Elise were to fight well in the Empire in this state, the name “Assassin Elise” could become famous.
But…….

2. Those seeking to hire an assassin prefer to examine a portfolio rather than simply looking at a ranking.

This is where the dilemma begins.

If you publicize your assassination record, you create enemies.
If you don’t publicize it, you have no accomplishments to show.

Take, for instance, Professor Hacon, who is known to be dead by my hand—he succeeded at countless assassinations and was exposed, made public.
Among his targets was Professor Leo’s sibling, which earned him lasting enmity.

But assassins don’t want to die either.
This was why the Black Path and White Path first split.
Even if one assassinates others, one needs protection so that others cannot harm oneself.

Beyond that, there are stories of assassins fabricating group assassination records that never happened and uploading them to their portfolios to maintain a nominal resume—such things—but it isn’t particularly important.

– Grey: I’m dying

Then another message arrived.
Probably trapped in Zone 9 again, suffering.

– Me: I’ll live
– Grey: What??ㅠㅠDon’t live happy die
– Me: I’ll live happily
– Grey: Don’t ㅜㅠㅠㅠDon’t leave Grey alone and live happy ㅠㅠㅜㅜㅜㅜㅠㅠㅠ

I laughed without thinking.
Anyway. I was resting in peace, and it was pleasant to simply watch the success I’d created with my own hands unfold.
What did it matter to me whether Grey suffered or not?
As long as I remained at ease.

……I had this thought, and so I was promptly punished for it.

The hallway on the way to a faculty meeting before the break. Until now I’d skipped every other meeting I wanted to avoid, but this one was mandatory, so I was heading to it when—
“Professor Dante!!” came the cry, and suddenly faculty members came rushing at me.
Literally like a horde of the undead.

“Professor Dante, senior! Do you have a moment to talk!?”
“Wait, just a moment…! I came here first, you see? The Chief of the White Path said he had some free time and….”
“P-Professor Dante. Do you have time after the meeting…!? I have a wonderful proposal for you…!”

Countless professors surrounded me in an attempt at kidnapping. What is this.
It wasn’t just one or two. Members of both the Black Path and White Path were mixed together. And there was even a senior professor among them. Wilhelm—why is this fellow here again.

“Professor Dante…! Just one autograph, one autograph…!”

An autograph? Of what?
So I gathered together what was being said by everyone and understood.
It seemed that in other meetings, the associate professor and Wilhelm had described my role indirectly.
On this trip to the Empire—bringing along the princess, revising Grey’s costume, placing a bet with the Assassination Daily News, defeating Croitz’s senior professor in an Illusion Magic confrontation, and so on.
In all this, wasn’t it my Illusion Magic that caused Grey to be featured in the Assassination Daily News in the first place?
And at the end of all that, a rumor had begun to circulate through the department.

【 “If Professor Dante takes on an advisee, that student will absolutely strike gold in the Empire!” 】
【 “The Assassination Unit! Dante’s Assassination Unit still has 2 openings, I hear……. If only we could get our Marina in there…!!” 】

Good heavens.
The gates to the Empire are already opening. Every professor stands on the brink of an enormous opportunity. If they could hand over one of their students to me for a moment—if that student were to make a splash in the Empire the way Grey has—what tremendous prestige would they gain?
There are three ways to elevate a professor’s reputation: martial prowess, research, and the achievements of their students. It’s the last one that’s expanded to absurd proportions.
On top of that, I’ve made myself an easy target precisely because I maintain neutrality.

【 ‘Hanging a bell around Grey’s neck. Negotiating with the princess. And making the Imperial shoot spectacular…. Director Ezekiel was right. Professor Dante was born with the Golden Hand….…’ 】

What in the world is that supposed to mean?
The Magic Department chair seems to have stuck me with a strange nickname.
More to the point, everyone’s gaze is fixed on my hand.

【 ‘I need that Golden Hand….’ 】
【 ‘If only my student could catch his attention….’ 】

Their eyes were beginning to glint with madness.
And their legs twitched as though they were about to lunge forward.
No, no—stay back.

“Wait.”

I thrust my hand up urgently, pointing.
My firm voice cut through the wild hunger in their eyes, calming them. Momentarily.
The professors stalled, just for an instant.

“But—what’s that over there?”
“That? What do you mean?”
“Huh? You’re saying there’s something over…?”

Every head swiveled to follow the direction of my finger.

“Wait—Dante’s getting away!”
“No, no! Grab him! Grab him!”
“Seize Professor Dante right now!”

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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