Sister-in-law of the Heroine in a Childcare Novel - Chapter 234

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 234

“Chirp.”

One glance was enough to see it.
A single bird lay curled upon itself in blissful oblivion, nestled atop plush, downy bedding within what could only be described as a perfect aviary—or rather, a structure far too beautiful and expansive to earn so humble a name.
Vines and shrubs and flowers decorated it here and there, filling the air with fresh fragrance. In one corner, nuts and dried fruits that Jemina had tasted by category earlier were laid out, ready for whenever she wished to eat.
After chirping at me in greeting, she dozed off again, and a soft cooing sound drifted from her throat.
“…….”
-Your expression seems strange, Contractor.ヾ(´･ ･｀｡)ノ”
“No, I was just thinking… don’t Jemina and I employ similar methods? I suppose this is what it feels like to watch someone use a trick you recognize and simply let it pass.”
-Yes, that’s exactly what I wanted to say!( ∙̆3∙̆)
“That’s rich, coming from you—the one enchanted by ornate sword hilts and sword display stands.”
-B-but, I have my own dreams too! I’m sick of pretending to be an umbrella or a walking stick, wrapping cloth so tightly I can’t breathe and squeezing between the hem of your skirt! (º﹃º )
“Right, I understand…….”
I looked around the room assigned to me, my expression vague. It was a fine, spacious, pleasant room.
Accommodating my discomfort with attendants following me openly, the arrangement had been for them to wait nearby in shifts rather than trail me constantly, ready to assist only when called—which meant I could at least rest easy within the confines of my own chamber. That much was a genuine comfort.
After fleeing the place where Raymond and Lisianthus had been, nothing else occurred until I finally returned to my assigned room.
I stroked Jemina’s satisfied belly, lost in thought. She shuddered as my fingers gently ruffled her soft feathers, perhaps tickled. The voice I’d heard earlier replayed in my mind.
‘Then choose me instead of him.’
That deep, earnest gaze.
My entire body had stiffened in that instant. If Raymond’s entrance hadn’t shifted the mood with what seemed like a casual joke, I honestly couldn’t gauge what I might have done in response.
“……It didn’t seem like a joke, to be honest.”
-Who are you referring to?( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o)
“The second son of this household. The one like a sea cucumber.”
-I personally think the people of this house never joke when it comes to Princess Titania.⊙︿⊙
“I always thought he could never come to like me the way she does.”
They say the opposite of love isn’t hatred but indifference, yet all the ‘Titanias’ I’d known never understood Lisianthus’s affection. Couldn’t even imagine it. That fool—wholly devoted to his older brother like some appendage, and to his younger sister as if he were bewitched, burning with resentment like he’d kill me if given the chance. Why…? Though if we’re speaking of ‘why,’ Raymond is strange too.
-Are you troubled in heart?๏_๏
“…….”
-…Ah, is it… that you dislike it?
( ´△｀)
“I’ve come to think that the members of this household are like an ideal—all the things ‘Titania’ truly desired and wished to possess, everything she admired, crystallized into one form.”
When I thought about it objectively, that was it.
Perhaps at first I was drawn to Raymond himself, but later I came to want all of it—his background, his devotion to family, everything in totality.
It wasn’t merely romantic desire, but a rather infantile longing for people of such stature to love me unconditionally, without reason.
Deprivation is the root of desire. The Castrain Ducal House could fulfill everything that ‘Titania’ of that time wished for.
“So, Bibi is the only girl in that house, and she’s young. Beautiful, cute, and adorable—and precisely because she was the ‘only’ princess, she could connect with Raymond in a way I could, making her not merely a replacement but something greater entirely. So no matter how caustic and foolish she might behave, when she suddenly decides to feed such feelings to someone directly, it just—burst forth.”
-You’ve been talking about ‘that time’ quite often lately.
“I can’t deny the beginning.”
A button sewn on crooked from the start.
That’s why, whenever I see Raymond or Lisianthus, I feel bewildered, uncomfortable, caught in that subtle, ticklish space between them—while blunt stones accumulate one by one, layer upon layer, in my stomach. Somewhere in my heart, a spirit worn thin and exhausted from depths where it refuses to wake manages a bitter laugh.
It comes down to this.
I know the future. I know the outcome. That’s why this is the choice I made. Because there was an original wrong at the start, this is just a struggle not to flee.
“I think I hated it when Raymond pitied me even before I’d recovered all my memories. I understand why now.”
If we trace everything back to its origin, it is ultimately a stone I myself stacked.
Because there was a beginning, there is a present—and knowing that beginning, I cannot shamefully affirm only the present. That I vanished; they cling to that thought like a nightmare, the Castrain Family people who have been pursuing me. Yet this was surely what the original ‘Titania’ wished for more than anything, even more than her own life.
To escape from that self, to grow, to make different choices, to atone for what she had done—that is why I changed.
So, rather comically, the very situation that past self desired most has arrived, yet I cannot rejoice in it purely.
I was glad. Rather, it was bewildering enough to overwhelm me.
The world is truly ironic. A smile leaked from the corner of my mouth.
“In truth, if I had truly lost everything, the ‘Titania’ of that time would have been unmoved. The way to live in this world, how to form bonds with others. Even if I suffered loss, even if everyone seemed wicked to me. Somewhere there are good, decent people who struggle through reality no matter what. I could have lived according to my own beliefs without ever forgetting even the names my parents gave me—parents who taught me this. Back then, with few memories and little to recall, it might have been easier.”
But as it happened, it did not turn out that way. Only a Titania who has known parental love, who knows the dream of a midsummer night, can become the price of sacrifice.
Of course, I know this now.
Even knowing all of it, I will not flee.
Even if I myself amount to nothing, this world will remain unchangingly beautiful, everyone will move toward the future, and even if my name is forgotten by all.
Even if it’s painful and bitter and miserable enough to want to scream—even if the Titania I was would ultimately rather die cleanly than do this, would rather flee.
‘I will do whatever you wish, whenever you wish.’
No. That won’t do.
If I recall Raymond’s face here.
Raymond, knowing everything about me, behaves as if he’ll hold me without a second thought, and that unsettles me.
Really?
Truly?
The desire to ask such things bubbles up like foam from beneath the surface of my mind.
Because the original me was this pitiful.
That man too, if we traced back to the very beginning, might well look upon me with contempt.
I had consoled myself many times as I combed through the memories.
It’s all right if I’m not someone’s first. I don’t want to ruin someone with selfish love like Father did… It’s all right.
It’s all right.
So I absolutely cannot let anyone see even the slightest hint that it isn’t.
“The Castrain Family—if they’re dealing with me as I am now, they seem the sort who’d do anything to protect me. That’s unjust.”
-……And your own feelings, Contractor?
“The world wasn’t meant to turn perfectly… so fairly and cleanly and beautifully in the first place.”
And becoming an adult means understanding that there are things that must be done even while accepting that.
“So yes, I should leave early.”
-You’re running away again?
“I’ve been acting spoiled, haven’t I?”
-……You, Contractor? Seriously?(꒪⌓꒪)
The Sword’s tone somehow sounded genuinely exasperated.
“I knew what needed to be done but postponed it because I wanted to play. I chose to do this thinking I wouldn’t be able to play anymore. But if I keep wavering like this, seeing that dog-faced bastard or Raymond’s silent stare like some abandoned beast, I’ll keep deferring and deferring until I ruin everything. Except they won’t understand why I’m doing this.”
He truly did cling like a dog, so ‘dog-faced’ was merely descriptive. Not profanity. I recalled the epithet I’d just used for Lisianthus, who’d been clawing at me until moments ago, and laughed quietly.
Whether ‘Titania’ viewed others as strangers or not, in the end, every Titania would absolutely, absolutely refuse to reveal all her truth to the Castrain Ducal House.
Even if a blade were pressed to my throat.
Better to simply die.
A Titania who knows the ‘beginning’ is ashamed that these people cling to her because of my past actions, yet cannot reveal all the facts either—so. The conclusion was actually decided from the very start.

“Ah, I woke Jemina.”
-Well, I can’t quite tell if this ‘instinct that things will ruin’ is correct or not. Really…….=͟͟͞͞( ¯−︎¯ )
Jemina, who had been dozing, shook out her feathers and approached me with a soft sigh. The bird’s warm body heat warmed my skin.

The bird’s wide-eyed gaze fixed on me. I flinched at my shoulders.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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