Sister-in-law of the Heroine in a Childcare Novel - Chapter 124

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 124

When I was young. That is, in my past life, before now, I had such a conversation with my mother.
‘Mom, that homeless man is strange. I saw him feeding a stray dog when no one was around, but when people are watching, he pretends to bully the dog openly. If anyone says anything, if they get upset with him, he makes like he’s kicking the dog. Why does he do that? You said people who hurt animals are all bad people. Is that man a bad person?’
‘That homeless man loves the dog, but he thinks his love for the dog would be bad for it.’
‘Why?’
‘Because he’s homeless. If people think the dog belongs to a homeless man, if they think it has an owner, they won’t try to find it a new one. And there’s a prejudice that a homeless man’s dog would be dirtier, less clean. So instead, he thinks it’s better if people curse him. If he looks like a bad man tormenting the dog, then maybe people will at least pity the dog. And usually, when people come to hate themselves, they sometimes act deliberately as if they’ve become a bad person… and such.’
‘Does the homeless man hate himself then?’
‘He might be trying to get people’s curses because he hates his own circumstances—not being able to openly show affection for the dog. People sometimes torment themselves that way.’
‘But still, hurting the dog is wrong.’
‘Yes. If you really love a dog, then no matter what your intentions are, you shouldn’t hurt it like that. But people aren’t such one-dimensional beings. So…’
That man and the dog eventually parted ways.
Following a citizen’s report that the homeless man was abusing the dog, he was no longer allowed to appear in the park, and the dog was taken by the city.
But with so many abandoned dogs, no one could say whether it would find a new owner safely.
I sometimes wondered. Which was better for that dog? The dog had seemed to love that homeless man so much. It looked so happy when they were alone together…
Ironically, now I felt I understood that dog’s heart.
Elaine looked utterly exhausted. She seemed to have lived her whole life like a defensive hedgehog, curling into herself with spines raised, determined not to let even a shred of the emotions accumulated within escape. That was how I could tell.
This woman, if she loved Titania, would have no choice but to affirm all her hardships and adversities. It seemed there wouldn’t be a single grain of meaning left in her life.
That was how she’d been thinking. The things she’d endured had been so unbearably painful that she couldn’t bear it without blaming someone.
I could feel that ignoring Titania wasn’t purely happiness and joy for Elaine herself.
It was far from rational behavior. But it’s difficult to expect rationality from someone who is worn and exhausted. So I stated my conclusion calmly.
“Go to Armelline Villa with Valentina.”
At my words, Elaine’s shoulders flinched.
“No matter how much an emperor he is, he won’t be able to demand the empress consort back from a place where Valentina resides. Once she’s out of sight, she’ll fade from his mind as well. If you spread word that your health improves and deteriorates in cycles, the emperor, impatient and without the will to seek her out directly, will give up after hearing news for a few years.”
“…….”
“After a few years pass like that, you could even ask Valentina to have you presumed dead.”
Elaine blinked, startled.
“There’s no reason to doubt her. She’s wealthier and more capable than we think, with a wide network besides. If you ask her to lend a hand with something like this, she seems the sort who would do it sincerely.”
“Why, why…? Why would she help me?”
“Because she knows better than anyone the heart of a woman whose life was ruined by a profligate husband.”
“…….”
“You seem to hate the Imperial Palace, so I’ve arranged a safe way for you to leave it. Whether you use that to flee somewhere else or choose to return—that’s your choice. But there’s no desperately urgent reason to turn down my proposal and take Cleo’s hand, is there?”
I didn’t want to say I understood, or that I forgave her, or anything like that. I simply accepted it.
That was the kind of person she was.
She might have secrets I didn’t know, or other reasons besides. But they would be far removed from whatever hope young Titania had once placed in her birth mother.
If Elaine had done more than simply watch over Princess Titania while consuming poison for her sake.
Well, what of it? The very “Princess Titania” had changed. If one keeps hoping with limited information, then finds that hope was false and repeats the disappointment—how is that different from that princess clinging to Young Duke Castrain?
“Try living for yourself. If entering the palace was unjust, unbearable, if you could not possibly love your child—imagine living a new life in a place where none of those things matter. Then perhaps, living itself might become a little better. If I have a daughter and don’t have to either love or hate her… just think of yourself as a free person.”
“…….”
“You perform so well in front of others, feed strange things, trick and torment, and then ask why—so it seems Empress Consort Elaine simply never knew any other way to live. I have no intention of being dragged down myself while resenting someone barely clinging to life.”
Young Titania, having never met a proper guardian, grew up a wreck.
She didn’t know how to act differently. She didn’t know how to build proper relationships.
The empress consort is an adult, so it might be a different matter, but if she had no choice, wouldn’t the result have been the same?
In such circumstances, to console and love and cherish a child, telling them they are not at fault… If such a person had been her birth mother, Titania would not have been broken. But rather than assigning blame to someone, wouldn’t it be better to simply rage against the fact that such an environment was given in the first place?
If the emperor had been a decent man from the start, there would have been no problem at all.
Elaine’s lips moved uncertainly several times before she spoke. Like someone forcing herself to say words she desperately didn’t want to say.
“……Do you not resent me?”
“A little? But that’s… it’s no different from pressing someone already struggling and asking, ‘Why didn’t you do better?’ I realized that not long ago. From what you say, Empress Consort Elaine, you’re already resenting yourself quite enough.”
I set down my empty tea cup.
“There’s no need for us to live as a loving mother and daughter from here on.”
“…….”
“But you’re still my mother, and I’m still your daughter, and it seems you’ve suffered greatly because of what others say. But others are others, and we are we. We each go our own ways and live well. Unless there’s a reason as desperate as turning down my proposal and taking Cleo’s hand.”
“…No, there isn’t anything like that.”
“Then that settles it.”
I rose slowly from my seat.
If Elaine had truly, unwaveringly possessed the will to kill Princess Titania no matter what happened, I wouldn’t have responded so ambiguously.
But she didn’t have that level of resolve.
Looking back, Elaine stood unsteadily, watching me.
Her face, which had always been like an expressionless doll’s, now looked bewildered—like a young child lost alone on an unfamiliar path.
As if she’d never once considered such a method. As if she’d never even imagined she could walk down such a path.
If she’d believed she had no ally in this world. If she’d thought no one in the palace would become her person.
If she’d been able to think of the daughter she could nurture not merely as a burden of childrearing, but as a new person who could become an axis of her life.
But that too is a conclusion. It’s pointless for someone drowning and struggling in a river to tell them the shore is that way—why don’t you swim in that direction? They can’t properly hear such advice.
So I decided to throw her a rope. What she’ll think after coming ashore and drying her wet body is another matter.
“Just think a little about how to live happily.”
However foolish, selfish, and stupid Titania was, if she learned that her mother had suffered to the point of death—no, to the point of being as good as dead—then even if she wept all day, in the end she might have given up on her side.
Thinking that way, it was fine. It had been fine.
As long as one is alive, anything is possible.
I left without waiting for Elaine’s response. I still had someone else I needed to see.

* * *

The Saffron Palace was beautiful.
Usually, when a legitimate imperial princess is born—that is, the daughter between the emperor and empress—it’s the palace typically bestowed on her. It must have been in terrible condition after being empty for some time, yet the emperor had apparently been so thorough in having it cleaned that it looked splendid now.
There were several named palaces within the Imperial Palace, and with their deep history came certain images and nicknames attached to each. To give a simple example, the Rose Palace granted to me, for all its flowery name, has no substance—that is, it’s a palace with little noble standing.
The Saffron Palace, by contrast, was something like the representative palace of blue blood, the imperial house itself. Without this matter, it wouldn’t normally be a place my feet would ever tread.
“So I finally see your face clearly.”
I laughed a touch self-consciously before Valentina. The atmosphere of the reception room, filled with fine antiques, was warm.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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