Sister, I Hit You Because There Was a Ghost Behind You - Chapter 38

—————
This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
—————

Chapter 38. There Is No Morning Call More Terrifying Than a Monday Morning
Through the Silent Forest where blizzards raged, we stumbled forward in a zigzag pattern like drunken fools. The crushing tide of sleep proved more formidable than any magic. I pinched my thigh and muttered numbers to myself.
“One thousand nine hundred ninety-seven Gold… One thousand nine hundred ninety-eight Gold…”
Kairik von Herzen, walking beside me, staggered and rested his head against my shoulder with a groan.
“Violetta… Just one minute… Can’t I sleep for a bit? I’ll give you a castle in my dreams…”
I slapped Kairik’s cheek sharply and shouted.
“Property deeds don’t transfer in dreams! Get a grip, Your Majesty!”
Smack!
At the crisp sound, Kairik’s eyes snapped open. He rubbed his stinging cheek and grumbled.
“Ugh… You’ve got quite the hand. That certainly wakes you up.”
Demian Lyart, following behind, leaned heavily on his sword as if it were a staff. With his eyes half-closed, he chanted an incantation to endure.
“Divine one… Grant me caffeine… No, grant me enlightenment.”
We slapped each other’s cheeks and screamed to keep ourselves awake, barely making it through the forest. At last, the trees gave way to an open expanse.
A vast Ice Lake stretched before us.
The entire surface was blanketed in thick ice, and above it, a violet mist crept upward like living breath. And at the center of the lake, beneath the frozen surface, a colossal shadow lay curled in slumber.
I peered at the lake bottom with my spirit vision and spoke.
“There it is. The Spirit of Sloth.”
It was a massive, rotund spirit resembling a seal or a bear.
The creature lay on its back at the lake’s bottom, sleeping without a care in the world. Each time it snored, water droplets rose upward, and violet ripples spread across the entire forest.
Kairik von Herzen clenched his fist and asked.
“So we just need to wake that chubby thing up?”
I nodded and replied.
“Yes. According to the Witch Grandmother, it requires ‘an extremely loud and powerful shock.'”
Demian Lyart studied the ice thickness with a worried expression and spoke.
“The ice is remarkably thick. I doubt I can shatter it in a single strike with my sword.”
I set down my bag and retrieved my secret weapon. It was something I’d taken from the Imperial Palace Storehouse.
A magical amplifier called the “Banshee’s Scream”—and as a bonus, a massive mana bomb made from compressed firework powder.
I grinned wickedly and gave instructions to the two men.
“Operation name: ‘Hell’s Monday Morning.’ Your Majesty and the Count will drill holes in the ice. I’ll plant the bomb and terrorize that creature’s eardrums with this amplifier.”
Kairik von Herzen chuckled and drew his sword.
“Hell’s Monday Morning—now that’s a brutal name. Alright, let’s do this.”
We carefully made our way toward the center of the lake. With each crack and crunch beneath our feet, my heart seized. As we reached the spot directly above the spirit, drowsiness crashed down like a waterfall. Demian Lyart swayed and spoke.
“Ugh… The sleep waves here are too strong. I can barely stand.”
I bit my tongue until blood flowed, clinging to consciousness, and screamed.
“Hurry! If we fall asleep now, we’ll never wake! Drill through it!”
“Haaah!”
Kairik von Herzen and Demian Lyart roared in unison and brought their weapons crashing down on the ice. A crimson aura and white holy power collided, fracturing the thick frozen surface.
Crack!
A hole opened, and frigid lake water erupted upward. I shoved the prepared massive mana bomb through the opening and bellowed.
“It’s in! Countdown! Three, two, one!”
I lit the fuse of the bomb and stepped back.
Boom!
A dull explosion echoed from the lake bottom. The shockwave sent tremors through the entire frozen surface as if an earthquake had struck. I watched the sleeping spirit jolt awake, its eyes snapping open in surprise.
[What?!]
But it wasn’t enough. The creature tried to close its eyes again. This was my moment. I pressed the Banshee’s Wail amplifier to my mouth and cranked the volume to maximum. Drawing every ounce of air from my lungs, I screamed.
“Hey, you lazy, bloated sloth! Wake up! Time for work!”
Aaaahhhhh!
My voice, amplified through the speaker like a sonic weapon, hammered across the lake. It wasn’t merely a shout. It was a soul-piercing wail laden with the anguish and fury of the working class, the lash of capitalism itself.
“You’ve got loans to repay! Credit card bills are due! This is no time to sleep!”
At my roar, snow cascaded down the mountainside like an avalanche. Kairik von Herzen and Demian Lyart clapped their hands over their ears, collapsing in agony.
“Aaahhh! My ears!”
The spirit at the lake bottom writhed in torment as well.
The creature probably had no idea what “work” or “credit card bills” meant, but regardless, my scream must have sounded more terrifying than any curse. Unable to endure it any longer, the spirit burst through the water’s surface.
Splash!
A colossal seal-shaped spirit erupted through the shattered ice. Its face twisted in fury as it roared.
[Who dares disturb my slumber?! This noise is unbearable!]
The spirit swung its massive flipper to attack us. But the drowsiness had already vanished. Kairik von Herzen seized the moment, brandishing his blade with a shout.
“Since you’re awake, wash your face!”
Slash!
Kairik von Herzen’s sword energy grazed the spirit’s flipper. The creature shrieked in pain.
[Ow! It hurts!]
Demian Lyart raised his holy sword high and chanted an incantation.
“Sloth is sin! Light of Judgment!”
A brilliant pillar of light pierced the spirit’s crown.
[Ugh… so bright!]
The spirit reeled from the barrage, dazed and confused. I charged forward with my hammer, jabbing it toward the creature’s face as I bellowed.
“Clear that mist right now! If you don’t, I’ll nag you for twenty-four straight hours! Understand?!”
I raised the amplifier again, pressing my threat.
“Your salary’s cut! Bonuses forfeited! Mandatory overtime!”
As I unleashed the curses of modern society, the spirit recoiled in terror, stumbling backward. It whimpered pitifully, as if deeply wronged.
[Fine! Fine, I get it! I’ll clear the mist! Why are you hitting me and screaming?!]
As the spirit trembled, the violet mist that had blanketed the forest and village was sucked away as if it had never existed. The sky cleared, and the heavy air grew light. The curse of sloth had been lifted.
I lowered the amplifier and smiled with satisfaction.
“That’s what I thought. It’s so much better when you listen the first time.”
The spirit grumbled and vanished into the lake’s depths, fleeing as if in disgrace.
[Disgusting. I’m never coming to the human world again!]
Mission complete.
Kairik von Herzen stared blankly, picking at his ear canal with a bewildered expression.
“…What exactly were you screaming about while swinging that hammer? Loan interest? This month’s magic card bill? Why were you suddenly ranting about payment deadlines in the middle of a blood-soaked battlefield?”
I casually slung the massive hammer—still dripping with beast blood—over my shoulder and wiped the sweat from my brow before answering without concern.
“Ah, yes, such things exist. The most terrifying dark magic incantations in the world—ones that gnaw away at the human soul and shatter reason itself.”
At my brazen response, even Demian Lyart, who had been lowering his holy sword, shook his head in disbelief. His face had grown somewhat pale as he pressed a hand to his chest and murmured.
“More horrifying than any heretic’s curse. Your voice just now was a hundred times more frightening than the roars of those abominable beasts.”
We emerged from the forest with lighter hearts. Upon reaching the Cottage, the horses that had collapsed were now awake, grazing peacefully. The murmur of voices drifted up from the Lower Village below. Everything had returned to normal.
But such joy was short-lived.
Someone stood before the Witch’s Cottage. A mysterious man draped in a black robe threw a single letter from his breast as we approached, then vanished like smoke.
I picked up the letter that had fallen to the ground and unfolded it.
There, written in crimson ink, was a brief message.
「Congratulations. You have passed the second gate. But the third calamity shall strike from the place you trust most. – Rasputin」
The place we trust most? I crumpled the letter and furrowed my brow.
“This persistent old fool isn’t even a stalker…”
Then Kairik von Herzen’s expression turned cold and rigid as he spoke.
“The place we trust most… Surely not Fenris Castle?”
Demian Lyart’s face suddenly drained of color as he cried out.
“The Capital! The Imperial Palace! Or perhaps… the Holy Temple!”
The third calamity—it was targeting our very stronghold.

—————
This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
—————