Resetting Lady - Chapter 91

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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If Raymond was the person Karen thought he was, he shouldn’t have confessed his love to her. His eyes should have grown colder day by day, and eventually he should have pointed a gun at Karen. If he was the person Karen thought he was. Karen’s emotions were in turmoil. She was anxious. And soon Karen understood why her emotions were like this.

 

“…I really am hopeless too.”

 

She demanded to be loved, but in truth, she wanted to be stabbed with a blade.

 

Because it seemed like it would be more interesting.

 

Karen stared blankly into space. This wouldn’t lead to any answers. This life was too confusing. But at the very least, she had to be honest with herself.

 

Karen clenched her hands. Her nails dug into her palms. She felt strange. I don’t like that you accepted me. I don’t like that your previous behavior suddenly changed. Can I trust you? Can I trust Raymond? Karen couldn’t trust him.

 

But it wasn’t her who would decide. It was Dulan. Whether it was love or not, he was the one who would pass judgment.

 

Hadn’t Karen chased after Raymond in this life because Dulan had thrown out bait in the first place? So instead of her original grand dream of being a serial killer, hadn’t Karen been running around and playing earnestly with Raymond?

 

When had things gone so wrong? But that wasn’t what mattered. Karen consoled her regret.

 

“Right, there’s no problem at all.”

 

Karen muttered. In the empty room. The sunlight was warm. It was the height of summer. The light was dazzling. She had to get up. There wasn’t much peaceful time left. Since Raymond had proposed to her, she had to use that as grounds to go find Dulan.

 

Whatever emotions Karen had toward Raymond, or even if she had no emotions at all. Such things probably weren’t very important. Karen sighed. She hoped Dulan would give her an answer through Raymond’s proposal.

 

Karen would now get a hint from Dulan, and finally be able to die.

 

Human emotions were utterly trivial things. In this tedious continuation of life, in this eternal maze, human emotions that changed dozens of times a day were worthless.

 

“So that’s why I feel strange.”

 

Perhaps she was completely wrong about everything.

 

Karen shook her head.

 

“This is all because of Lord Raymond.”

 

Karen reached a conclusion.

 

The reason she was struggling was because of that. Because Raymond had given her flowers. Because they were the flowers he had given her when he first proposed. And because he had given them to her again now. A hundred years had passed. Raymond was unchanged. Karen steadied her mind that felt like it would collapse.

 

“Maybe it’s because I don’t love him.”

 

Karen said. She looked at the portraits. Maybe that was it. Karen was the one who had done wrong. Because Karen hadn’t truly loved and had treated people like text, because she hadn’t loved and had seen love merely as a means.

 

Because Karen herself hadn’t loved anyone for a hundred years.

 

So she thought that perhaps she kept repeating because of that.

 

Her mother and her mother’s mother, her mother’s mother’s mother had met men they truly loved and escaped the curse, while she was trapped in this yoke because she loved no one.

 

“Would everything end if I loved someone?”

 

Karen muttered. But she didn’t know the answer. She was just muttering.

 

Karen suppressed the urge to cry as she looked down at the flowers alone in her room.

 

Still, it would be worth trying.

 

Worth trying.

 

Though there wasn’t much time left, Karen resolved that she should try harder to love Raymond.

 

But that night Raymond didn’t return, leaving only a letter behind.

 

“Isn’t this too sudden?”

 

Karen looked down at the letter Raymond had hastily left.

 

It said that something had suddenly come up and he would have to be away for a while. It wasn’t even proper letter paper, but seemed to be hastily scribbled on a torn page from a notebook. To work someone like this when they were about to retire.

 

“Wouldn’t it be better to postpone the wedding?”

 

“No, it would be difficult to postpone it too.”

 

There wasn’t much time left anyway. She didn’t know exactly when Raymond would arrive, but she didn’t doubt that he would eventually return safely this time too and marry her.

 

“Still, like this…”

 

Karen looked down at another letter.

 

It was a letter from the royal palace.

 

Prince Guiz was summoning her once again.

 

* * *

 

A letter with obvious intent.

 

Come to my side and warm my bed.

 

Karen sighed. Raymond wasn’t there. And Countess Elba would absolutely not protect her. Going against the royal family carried too much risk. Only someone like Raymond who believed in principles and conscience would do such crazy things. That’s why Karen had chosen him.

 

But would Raymond be able to protect her this time too? Now events were starting to occur that made it difficult for Karen to calculate the possibilities.

 

“What would happen if I didn’t go?”

 

Just when she had made a difficult decision for once, this was the trial that came to her again.

 

Raymond was called away to work again, and she was summoned by Prince Guiz. In the past, at most it ended with suffering at Isella’s hands. Indeed, in romance novels, women made better villains. When men got involved, the story became sordid. It reeked of filth.

 

“Why is Prince Guiz so obsessed with me?”

 

“Miss…”

 

That horny bastard.

 

Was he taking out on the daughter his regret at not conquering the mother? Of course, Karen had no intention of using the waste that Catherine had discarded. It wasn’t hygienic. Not good for mental health either, naturally.

 

If she didn’t go, how long would Raymond be called around by military orders? Raymond had said that once he quit the military and became a senator, the prince would no longer be able to directly influence him, but his opponent was royalty. First in line to the throne, no less. The crown prince.

 

How far could Raymond resist him? Even now, wasn’t Raymond away from Karen’s side? How far could his protection reach?

 

“Would Lord Raymond be safer if I went to Prince Guiz?”

 

Should that be the way?

 

Like many tyrants did. Like husbands whose wives, whose fiancées were stolen by those in power, was Raymond also being sent to dangerous places? So should Karen go to Prince Guiz for the safety of herself and Raymond? Until he was satisfied? Waiting only for him to tire of old goods? Until when?

 

But still, Karen had to choose.

 

In the end, it was a matter of doing it or not. Karen leaned toward the side of having to do it, if she had to choose.

 

But there were two problems.

 

The first was that Prince Guiz was one of her mother’s former suitors. And her mother was someone who lived the same repeating life as herself. Karen didn’t want to use a stick that her mother might have used. That was excessively unsanitary. It was an instinctive revulsion.

 

“I’ll just have to endure it.”

 

Karen felt like she was swallowing food waste down her throat, but she sighed heavily and accepted it. Thinking of the time she had repeated, she consoled herself that Guiz would probably be younger than her, but even having lived to this age, there were quite a lot of things she disliked.

 

But the bigger problem was something else.

 

The second was whether that was what Dulan considered love.

 

Stories of women giving their bodies to other men for the sake of their man were too numerous and common. But Karen had never once seen such stories end happily. The best outcome would be for the couple to bury it and treat it as if it never happened, but Raymond didn’t seem like he would do that either.

 

Should she spread her legs for Prince Guiz for Raymond’s sake?

 

Was that love?

 

Karen remained alone in her room, looking at the portraits filling the walls. She looked at the women. She looked at her mother.

 

Was becoming a whore for love actually love?

 

Did you do that?

 

Would the priest recognize that as love?

 

If she loved Raymond, should she sleep with another man for his sake?

 

“…Becoming an old man’s plaything is proof of love?”

 

It wasn’t even funny.

 

Why had she tried to kill people in this life? Wasn’t it because she was tired of being killed, because she wanted to live more freshly, because she wanted to live her own life that she had picked up the blade?

 

So why should she be confused in such a pathetic way?

 

Why should she be subjected to such a filthy test?

 

Night came amid the confusion.

 

Morning came again.

 

* * *

 

“Miss, you should at least eat something…”

 

“Get out.”

 

Karen lay face down and met no one. She didn’t even want to think. She wanted to extend the grace period as much as possible. I don’t want to judge. I don’t want to choose. Let me hold out like this until Raymond comes, then I’ll try to love him. Let him choose whether to go to Prince Guiz or not. Maybe discussing it together would be love?

 

“This letter…”

 

Karen handed a letter to Donna. There was no recipient. Karen spoke again.

 

“Deliver it to Dulan.”

 

Rather than make the wrong judgment, Karen decided to cheat and look at the answer sheet. She didn’t want to study anymore. If he said to go, she would go. If she went because Dulan told her to, even if she had to have an unsanitary experience. Dulan would give her the answer.

 

If Raymond died because Dulan told her not to go? Then that too would become Dulan’s responsibility. Karen was sick of it all. Raymond, Dulan, Guiz, Verdick, Isella, all of them.

 

* * *

 

But Raymond didn’t come. No answer came from Dulan either.

 

Karen buried herself among the flowers and counted. One, two, three…

 

And she thought of the past. How was he back then? Back then…

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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