Pretending to Be Human Is Exhausting Again Today - Chapter 42

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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Pretending to Be Human: Episode 042

“Come now, come inside. It’s cold out there.”

The Duchess grasped Loreil’s arm and drew him into the Manor. Following her inside, he caught sight of the gifts piled high in the Lobby and quietly closed his eyes.

Objects he had no desire to see.

“Mother brought these from the Castle! They’re things my son needs, aren’t they?”

A desk. The one Jorgue used to own.

A chair. The one Jorgue used to own.

A portrait frame. One depicting Jorgue and the Duke and Duchess together.

Every single item was stained with holy water and the Sun God’s insignia.

‘She thinks of me as her brother, yet she cannot abandon her faith in the divine.’

It was a contradiction. She wished to live as Jorgue, and yet she persistently suspected Loreil of being a Demon’s child. She was viewing one person through two separate identities.

What did she truly desire?

Loreil dissolving upon contact with holy water? Or a false Jorgue who refused death and continued living?

‘The rumors suggest I might have inherited Demon blood.’

It was absurd that the Duke and Duchess were the ones who believed these rumors most fervently. Yet he himself felt no discomfort even when offering prayers to the deity, let alone from holy water.

“Thank you, Mother. I shall place them in my room.”

“Yes, do that!”

Leaving the Duchess to her bright smile, I made my way toward the Prayer Room. With the Duke watching, it seemed my dawn and evening prayers would become non-negotiable.

Kneeling upon the cold marble floor before the statue of the Sun God, I clasped my hands in the pretense of prayer while my thoughts wandered.

‘Holy water does not work. Prayer does not work. Yet I can perceive magical energy, and the contract functions….’

I lack any sense of being human.

My clenched fists pressed my skin pale white.

I could find no adequate words to describe this sensation that denied my very identity.

If I could explain it—if I could confirm who I truly am—all these doubts would dissolve.

The Duke and Duchess, whom I’ve observed for decades yet regard as strangers, and the unfamiliar unease I feel each morning upon waking—all of it could finally vanish.

That’s why I had to uncover the Princess’s true identity.

‘I need to know what connection that familiar mana has to me.’

Black mana—something I’d never sensed from any sorcerer before.

It alone held the key to my liberation.

Then, Loreil felt his shoulders grow inexplicably heavy.

“…?”

He couldn’t discern why. He could only surmise it resembled that suffocating sensation he’d felt before meeting Deina.

* * *

A problem arose as I faced the schedule to receive the Princess of Jins Kingdom.

A fatal problem, in fact: a complete lack of funds.

I stood with folded arms, watching the inexplicable standoff between Emma and Grid.

Emma glared at Grid with an expression colder than usual, while Grid leisurely twirled his white hair between his fingers, ignoring her gaze entirely.

“So, to summarize the situation… Emma can’t accept Grid’s deal, is that right?”

“Indeed. The Separate Palace currently cannot afford such an outrageous price.”

Grid shrugged and spoke.

“As I’ve said repeatedly, there’s no helping it. I have to make a living too.”

“Ten gold coins can buy a twelve-seater carriage in the Capital market. Yet you’re asking for twenty gold coins for a mere six-seater!”

The reason the two were at odds stemmed from preparations for the journey.

To travel to meet the Princess of Jins Kingdom, I would need to cover considerable distance, requiring a carriage, horses, spare clothing, provisions, and countless other necessities.

But the Separate Palace lacked such resources, so I had to seek support from the Main Palace.

Unlike other Imperial Family members, I had no noble patrons or factions to sponsor me—it was inevitable.

The problem was….

‘I never expected the Main Palace’s support to be at this level.’

I surveyed the supplies from the Main Palace stacked in the Courtyard outside my window.

The gold-adorned carriage looked presentable on the surface, but upon closer inspection, it was riddled with defects—twisted axles, mismatched wheels. The other supplies were in similar condition.

‘The Main Palace does have guest carriages, but having a Princess drag one around would be far too undignified. Borrowing from other Imperial Family members is out of the question, and I have no idea how long repairs would take….’

It didn’t seem the Emperor had deliberately orchestrated such petty sabotage. Someone must have interfered along the way.

The prime suspect was the First Imperial Prince, Franz.

‘Franz has always been rather petulant.’

In any case, I decided to arrange the travel preparations myself, and since Grid was the only merchant I knew, I sought him out and instructed Emma to negotiate the purchases.

What began as a discussion had escalated into a quarrel.

Everything Grid had brought was exorbitantly priced. The carriages, cushions, even heating supplies—their costs were staggering.

Unlike me, who lacked financial sense, Emma, being a commoner, insisted Grid was profiteering and demanded the transaction be cancelled.

“Maid, it’s difficult if you suddenly request cancellation. You’re the one who ignored the quotation and requested the purchase due to urgency, are you not?”

“I would have purchased if the prices were reasonable. Demanding double or triple the market rate—isn’t that taking advantage of our urgency!”

“…You’re being too generous. I am merely….”

Sensing their argument would only escalate, I decided to halt the conversation.

“We understand each other’s positions. Let’s leave it at that.”

“…Yes.”

Since I needed to mediate the situation, I spoke to Grid with measured calm.

“Grid, you genuinely believe that price is justified, don’t you?”

“Of course.”

He explained his product with confidence.

“My carriage is flawless in both aesthetics and function. The wood from the Western Region was carved by a master craftsman, after all.”

“Didn’t you say last time that you make money by cutting corners on goods like these?”

“This time is different. As a merchant, I stake my honor on it—there are no defects in the goods I sell to the Princess.”

“So you’re definitely gouging the price?”

“It’s a reasonable profit margin.”

Emma glared at Grid sharply as he laughed with a “ha ha.”

I turned my gaze toward Emma this time.

“Emma, is the Separate Palace’s financial situation really that dire?”

“To be honest… yes, it is.”

She released a brief sigh before speaking.

“The Separate Palace operates with a minimal number of servants, so we don’t deviate greatly from the Main Palace’s budget. However, recent expenditures….”

“Ah, my dress expenses.”

Emma bowed her head apologetically.

With spring’s arrival, I would need to return to High Society, which meant purchasing new clothing, accessories, and the latest books on etiquette. The allowance provided by the Main Palace was laughably insufficient, forcing me to scrape together every coin I possessed.

‘Other Imperial Family members receive gifts from their patrons, or the Empress ensures they’re provided for. As for me, I have no such connections….’

If I asked the Emperor, he would grant me more than enough to cover everything, but he would undoubtedly use it as leverage to impose further commands. I had no intention of extending my hand to him.

In the end, the shortage of funds in the Separate Palace was my own doing.

After a moment’s deliberation, I posed another question to Grid.

“You won’t negotiate on the price?”

“Of course not.”

“You brought these items because you believed they would suit me, then?”

“Precisely. Considering Your Highness’s standing, these are the appropriate selections.”

Grid abandoned his playful smile and answered with earnest sincerity, as if imploring me to understand his genuine conviction.

‘Besides, once purchased, these items will see consistent use.’

Even in warfare, economizing on supplies only leads to regret later.

If I was destined to buy them anyway, deciding now was the wiser course.

“How much would be needed to purchase all the items we’ve requested?”

“Let me see… roughly this amount.”

Even I, a Princess, found the sum staggering. Emma, standing beside me as we reviewed the figure, went deathly pale.

“Y-Your Highness. Perhaps it would be better if I sought out other merchants myself….”

“Never mind. That would take far longer, and we couldn’t be certain of their reliability.”

For those of us ignorant in matters of commerce, being swindled was inevitable. Under such circumstances, trusting Grid was the better choice.

“But I don’t have gold coins available right now. Or perhaps, like last time, I could approach the Empress….”

“No. My dealings with the Empress ended last time.”

Besides, now that Loreil as an exchange condition had become void, she had no reason to help me. She probably even considered her assistance at the Arena a loss.

“So I’ll have to earn it myself.”

“Earn it….”

Emma’s brow furrowed, as if she thought such language unbecoming of a Princess. I smiled to reassure her.

Then I turned to Grid.

“You like any business that turns a profit, don’t you?”

“Generally speaking, yes.”

“Then listen to this.”

I lowered my voice to share confidential matters, laying out my plan to him in hushed tones.

“Have you ever considered receiving a divine blessing?”

“…Pardon?”

“I know a deity who is an exceptionally skilled exorcist, appraiser, and curse-breaking expert….”

Not a charlatan.

Humans readily called demons and spirits gods, did they not?

I grinned widely as I watched Grid’s bewildered expression.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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