I’m Done With Unrequited Love - Chapter 61

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Chapter 61
It would be a lie to say I wasn’t flustered.
A flood of hypotheses crashed through my mind like a tidal wave.
‘Why? Have I grown so accustomed to being close to Ernan that I stopped seeing him as a threat?’
Because we’d gone so long without any real incident, had my body simply stopped recognizing Ernan as someone dangerous?
Or perhaps….
‘….Do I still care for him?’
Haven’t these feelings truly faded?
Is that why?
In this moment, I found myself adrift in the realization that I didn’t know myself at all.
The thought crept in that perhaps ending my unrequited love was nothing but a beautiful delusion.
‘Then, could it be that….?’
Might I have been able to touch him all along?
I stared blankly at our still-clasped hands before snapping back to attention, my eyes finding Ernan’s.
Our gazes collided.
I opened my mouth.
“I….”
But I had no idea what to say.
That was why.
“Let me go home and send you word.”
I let go of his hand and fled like a coward.
* * *
The moment I arrived at the Joneus Mansion, the first thing I witnessed was Sanna and Noel’s tag.
“Stop it, will you!”
“But my feelings are genuine!”
“That doesn’t matter!”
In the mansion’s hall, Noel pursued Sanna with a bouquet while she fled, wielding a broom in her other hand.
‘Where did that broom come from?’
My question was answered the very next instant, when an exasperated Sanna spun around and swung the broom at Noel with all her might.
“I told you to stop! No more! Not again!”
“Yipe!”
Now the roles had reversed.
Noel was fleeing while Sanna gave chase.
‘Good heavens….’
They hadn’t seen each other in a year, yet nothing between them had changed.
I found myself marveling at Noel’s constancy.
After a year apart, his love for her remained undiminished.
Noel’s departure to the Bertrand Territory and inability to see Sanna was the realization of my own resolve to leave for the Joneus Estate and stay away from Ernan for a long time.
‘If I had succeeded in returning to the Joneus Estate, would I have forgotten Ernan like Noel hasn’t forgotten Sanna?’
Love, after all, only grows fiercer when kept at a distance.
In that light, perhaps my failure to return to the Joneus Estate was providence.
‘I succeeded in ending my unrequited love through continued proximity.’
Though, strictly speaking, I hadn’t ended it completely.
I could feel in myself that I was on the verge of declaring victory.
First, when I saw him, my heart no longer raced as it once had.
Second, I’d been so consumed with creating my cure that Ernan barely crossed my mind.
And third, I’d come to love others besides him.
I meant Kiara and Rene.
“I told you once more and I won’t let it slide! Do my words mean nothing?!”
“That’s not it!”
“I don’t want to hear excuses!”
By now, Sanna had snatched the bouquet from Noel’s hands and was beating him with it in earnest.
Red rose petals scattered through the air.
‘What a mess.’
And there was one other person watching this spectacle besides me.
“….”
“Cesar.”
“…You’re back early.”
Our male protagonist, Cesar Bertrand, seemed to have barely managed a greeting—the fruit of an education that taught respect for one’s elders.
“Is this the first time you’ve seen Noel behave this way?”
Not quite that, though…….”
“Hmm? Does Noel court other women in Bertrand Territory in that manner?”
“No, that’s not it. I’ve seen him lose his composure like this fairly often, but never quite so……pathetically.”
“That’s possible. I was startled the first time I saw him like this too. My younger brother Noel could be flighty and hopelessly lighthearted at times, but he always knew his limits.”
Looking at him now, he seemed like someone who’d never heard of the word “moderation” at all.
“You look rather exasperated with Noel.”
“……I apologize if that seemed rude.”
“No, it’s fine. Noel is my younger brother, but isn’t he your friend as well?”
“……Friend?”
Cesar hesitated, his expression clouding over as if in disagreement.
“But Noel is my tutor.”
“Those two things can coexist. Sanna was both my aide and my friend, after all. Well, she’s stepped down from the aide position now, but still.”
So what I’m trying to say is this.
“Set your mind at ease. Surely Noel wouldn’t abandon you?”
“…….”
“Right now, you’re the most precious thing to him.”
Cesar went rigid, his eyes widening.
Then, as if some realization had struck him, he lifted his head sharply to look at me.
His red eyes wavered uncertainly.
I smiled faintly.
“You didn’t know it yourself, did you?”
I’d suspected as much.
The displeasure he’d felt at first seeing Kiara.
How he’d stood against Kiara when she criticized Noel during their quarrel in the study.
It was all nothing more than childish possessiveness—the kind only the young could harbor.
‘He’s closest to me!’ That sort of mentality.
‘Of course I don’t want to lose him.’
Hadn’t Kiara done the same with Rene back then?
Children are remarkably simple creatures.
‘And yet so delicate, so demanding.’

That observation fit perfectly.
“Shall I put an end to that pathetic spectacle for you?”
“……Is that possible?”
“Didn’t you see me get Noel under control before?”
“…….”
“To be honest, you didn’t like that either, did you? Thought I was tormenting Noel?”
“…….”
Cesar’s face flushed crimson as he lowered his head and nodded slightly.
I had to suppress the urge to laugh aloud.
Just then, glancing toward the staircase, I saw Kiara coming down with a face full of displeasure.
‘Yes, that’s exactly it.’
Because Cesar and I appeared to be getting along so well, he felt the same jealousy that Kiara felt.
“Fidellia, why are you and Cesar……!”
“Come on, let’s head inside. I’m getting tired. I should grab Noel and put him in his room before he causes any more trouble.”
“Wait, hold on……!”
I smiled smoothly and led Kiara into the mansion.
Not forgetting, of course, to grab Noel by the ear and drag him along, even as the bouquet continued to pelt him.
“Noel, you’re grown now—shouldn’t you be getting some sense into that head of yours?”
“Ow! Ow, Sister! My ear’s coming off!”
“It’s not coming off. As long as you stop being stubborn about wanting to stay with Sanna, your ear will remain perfectly attached.”
“Oh, come on!”
“Raising your voice now?”
“…….”
I led the suddenly silent Noel into the mansion by his ear.
Peace had finally returned to the estate.
* * *
Noel felt deeply wronged.
His sister Fidellia had prevented him from even making a proper declaration of love, and that was what grieved him most.
Oh, why must you be our sister’s friend, Sanna Vittoria?
Of course, if Sanna hadn’t been Fidellia’s friend, they might never have met at all.
Now Noel simply despised Fidellia for standing in the way of his romantic pursuits.
‘Just a little more courting and she’ll give in……!’
It was nothing more than the delusion of someone utterly devoid of romantic intuition, yet since Noel was alone, there was no one to correct this misconception.
Moreover, Noel’s romantic endeavor faced another complication.
Namely……
Cesar Bertrand, the young master he served.

Ever since that remark, Cesar had remained cold and distant.
He hadn’t emerged from his room at all.
No matter how much I apologize and explain, he won’t see me, so what can I do?
As a result, Noel was consumed by thoughts of Cesar all day long.
Still, he made a point of visiting Cesar’s door every day, knocking.
Knock, knock-knock, knock-knock.