I’m Done With Unrequited Love - Chapter 25
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Episode 25
Siren’s face was utterly bewildered.
He probably wondered what there was to say when we could simply enter the Banquet Hall right away.
I’d feel the same way.
But this was something he needed to know.
“I……”
Every time I tried to say this, opening my mouth felt impossibly difficult.
“I’m rather sensitive to physical contact with the opposite sex.”
Siren’s pale blue eyes blinked.
“What do you……”
That is to say.
In other words,
“I have a Panic Attack. Reflexively. Like a fit.”
I cut myself off there.
……
Somewhere along the way, my face had twisted.
Panic Attack.
……That was tied to the reason I’d died in my Past Life.
The emotions from that life hadn’t stayed with me, but the terror remained vivid and sharp.
A Trauma carved into my very soul.
I’d been struck down by a ruffian’s blade……
“Fidellia?”
“……!”
‘Ah.’
At Siren’s call, I returned to the present moment.
I forced myself to face reality directly.
‘Am I all right?’
I was all right.
Fortunately, my mental state was steady, so I managed to finish what I’d started to say.
“……It’s hard to explain in detail, but the point is, that’s how it is. I was trying to warn you to be careful.”
“Ah……”
Siren sat quietly for a moment, as if digesting my meaning.
Then his face drained of all color.
With his expression turned ashen, his lips trembled faintly—he looked as though he had a great deal to say.
At the same time, he looked unable to say any of it.
Finally, he managed to speak.
“……Then, when I first……when we first met……”
First?
“Fidellia!”
‘Oh, that.’
He’d come rushing toward me, calling my name three times like some reaper, and seized my shoulders.
I could guess why Siren was bringing it up now.
“Well, yes……”
“……!”
I’d almost gotten into trouble then—my stomach had churned so violently I nearly gagged.
At my confirmation, shock and guilt crashed through Siren’s clear eyes.
Mm.
‘If it came down to it, he’d probably kneel.’
Mercifully, Siren didn’t kneel.
If he actually had, I’d have pretended not to know him and left. A stroke of luck, that.
“Why that expression? You tripped and scraped your shin, remember? Good heavens, adding and subtracting, there’s nothing left owing. You know the saying—call it even. Don’t carry guilt over it.”
“But still……!”
I’m telling you, it’s fine.
“Give me your arm instead.”
“Pardon?”
“As an Escort.”
“Ah, yes!”
Siren extended one arm toward me.
His movement noticeably more cautious than before.
I placed my hand on his arm in turn, with equal care.
“……….”
In truth, when I reach toward him, there’s no significant reaction from his side.
‘I just need to prepare myself mentally.’
At any rate, I’d warned Siren. That would have to suffice.
I released a breath and looked toward the direction of Hall 1.
Even from the Garden, the massive Banquet Hall glittered brilliantly in the distance. The sky had turned pitch-black by then.
“Shall we go?”
“Yes!”
He answers well, at least.
* * *
What was it like when I first partnered with Ernan?
The Hotel Corridor was dim.
It carried the wood scent peculiar to old buildings, and the muffled sounds of the Banquet Hall beyond the tightly closed doors rippled through the stillness.
I sat by a window in the empty corridor, gazing out.
Unless it was a major gathering, the casual hotel socials and balls among the nobility didn’t place much importance on whether one had a partner.
Like the stepmother and stepsisters in Cinderella, families sometimes attended together, and people like Ernan and me existed too—those who came alone.
That’s right. Alone.
‘Reality’s crashing in.’
What was I even doing here?
I understood anew: when someone with no interest in building connections falls in love, this is what becomes of them.
The glittering lights, the raucous chatter, the melody of strings buried beneath it all, the crowd filling the hall, the endless stream of people engaging me in conversation—I had refused to enter that world.
There are days like this sometimes.
Doubt creeps in about things I’d done without thinking…
Days when it feels as though I won’t be able to continue anymore.
One year into this Unrequited Love. I was beginning to think I’d reached a crisis point.
‘One year… nearly two, really. That’s a long time to care for someone.’
“………”
Should I give up?
I claimed to be looking out the window, but all that lay beyond was impenetrable darkness. There were no glimmering stars for me.
‘Yes. Let’s give up.’
I’m a terminal case, after all.
Even if this Unrequited Love were to be realized, I would have to let him go in a few years’ time.
‘So that’s where we end it, Fidellia.’
With that thought, I made up my mind to go home.
‘Ernan will have plenty of fun on his own.’
He never cared whether I was there or not.
Tap.
The sound of footsteps echoed from the end of the corridor just then.
I felt puzzled.
‘Was there someone who hadn’t entered yet?’
The party was reaching its height.
By that measure, the owner of those footsteps was considerably late.
If they had no partner, they might be feeling rather lonely.
As I was thinking this…
The footsteps drew gradually closer, until they were at my very side.
Click.
They stopped right in front of me.
“………”
A cold shiver ran through me.
‘…What is this?’
Who was it?
‘Why did they stop right in front of me….’
I remained frozen in my pose of gazing out the window, unable to bring myself to look at who it was.
“Fidellia Jonners.”
At that single utterance,
at that familiar voice, I finally understood who it was.
“……Ernan Cleor.”
I turned to face a face that could only be called beautiful.
The tension melted away like snow.
Was I dreaming?
“Why are you here?”
I thought you’d be in the Banquet Hall by now.
Then Ernan fixed his gaze directly on me.
Just as I was wondering what was going on, the words tumbled out.
“And you, Fidellia?”
“……?”
“Why are you here?”
Why, indeed.
I tilted my head.
“I got sick of seeing you. I was going home.”
It was the truth, not a shred of falsehood in it. I’d give up this Unrequited Love too, while I was at it.
Ernan seemed to be thinking about something.
Then…….
“Here.”
He extended his hand to me.
“What is it?”
“Take it and come down.”
“I can come down on my own at this point. And…….”
And.
I laid bare my secret as if exposing some shameful weakness.
That I couldn’t touch men.
That it was impossible.
Even you.
It was such a strange, bewildering fact that confessing it felt like humiliation. “Confess” was too mild a word—”unburden” fit better.
“But…….”
“…….”
“You did show your good faith, didn’t you?”
Before Ernan could pull his hand back, I quickly grasped it.
I had to take a breath, but it was all right.
As long as he didn’t reach for me first.
As long as this kindness of his never came again.
Tap.
My two feet touched the ground as I descended from the window.
Only then did I truly understand.
“This is the first time. You’ve offered me your hand.”
That’s probably why I revealed my strange condition for the first time in a year.
Yet even in this historic moment, Ernan’s expression remained as unmoved as ever.
I couldn’t fathom what he was thinking.
‘I did tell him a secret, though.’
His response was underwhelming.
He always evaded my predictions, and in this moment too, he remained unknowable to me.
“While we’re at it, let’s do one more thing.”
What?
“Come with me inside.”
“Where to.”
It wouldn’t be home.
“The Banquet Hall. Isn’t the atmosphere in full swing?”
Ernan turned his head, gazing through the gap in the door toward the Banquet Hall entrance where yellow light danced and flickered.
“…….”
His profile in the shadows was devastatingly beautiful.
‘I’m furious.’
I was captivated by that side of his face.
And because of it.
I didn’t open my mouth to say, “But I clearly said I was going home,” and instead followed Ernan’s Escort in frustrated silence.
A partner I didn’t particularly need,
Yet for banquets where a partner was absolutely necessary, he’d always attended with the princess,
Always making me approach first before he’d acknowledge my greeting…….
When he extends his hand first like this, there’s only one thing I can do.
For the first time, I laid my hand upon his arm and walked with him into the brilliant light of the open doors.
I think I liked that.
The Unrequited Love she had meant to end lived on another two years, sustained by such memories.
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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