I Was Just Having Fun With The Time Limit - Chapter 195

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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That woman was truly special.
For some reason, I felt compelled to obey her words.
My body moved of its own accord, independent of my will, and I grasped the woman’s hand.
The moment I took hold of her hand, the surroundings grew bright.
It became so luminous that I could see nothing at all.
With a brilliant flash, it was as though the sun itself had exploded.
‘Where am I?’
I found myself in a space I had never seen before.
It was an immensely vast and white place.
If a white universe existed, I imagined it would be something like this space.
“You… Goddess.”
I wasn’t certain if she was truly a goddess, but that was the impression I had.
If I called her by any other name, I felt an inexplicable sense that I would commit some sacrilege.
“Am I dying now?”
“I suppose so.”
“Then is this place where I accept my death?”
“That is so.”
“As I mentioned before, I still have time remaining.”
“Death comes unexpectedly by nature. You never know when it will arrive. That is why it makes time feel eternal. It is a gift The Divine gives to children.”
I found it difficult to agree with those words.
“I knew exactly when I would die. Do you know how terrifying it was to see this day approach?”
“That is precisely why I came to fetch you early.”
“…”
It was not entirely wrong.
The days ahead would have been the most dreadful and frightening for me.
I would have trembled at the terrifying reality of having to part forever with those I held dear.
“Why did you give me such a life?”
“Did you not say just now that it was a gift, that you were grateful? Were those words false?”
I shook my head.
“It was all true. It was all true, and that is why I am so sorrowful.”
“Yes, you must be grieving deeply.”
The woman embraced me.
For some reason, it felt familiar.
“Are you perhaps someone I know?”
Dragons have transformed into human form and live human lives.
It did not seem impossible that The Divine could do the same.
“I have known you since long, long ago.”
The woman patted my back.
Pat, pat.
Her touch brought me comfort.
“Grieve as much as you wish. This is a place where that is allowed. You were a child who couldn’t afford to be sad, weren’t you?”
At those words, I finally broke down and wept.
She was right.
I was a child who couldn’t afford to be sad, even when sorrow consumed me.
Because I was the one who would leave first.
I would simply depart, but there were so many who would suffer, yearning for me after I was gone.
That’s why I couldn’t allow myself to struggle more than others.
Pat, pat.
Gentle hands caressed my back.
“Here, grieve all you wish. I will hold you.”
I couldn’t tell how much time had passed.
From this woman I’d never met before, I received such profound comfort.
After crying for so long, I even began to think that perhaps leaving unexpectedly was a blessing.
“Have you finished crying?”
“…Yes.”
I wiped away my tears hastily.
“Still, I regret not being able to say a proper farewell.”
“If you regret it so, then let us imprint their images upon your eyes before you go.”
The woman snapped her fingers, and a small table materialized before me.
Then a wisp of cloud came whooshing toward me.
“Sit there.”
This cloud was a chair.
When I sat, it was wonderfully soft and comfortable.
“Imprint their images upon your eyes.”
Several visions began to appear in the White Space.
* * *
Empress Serna, dressed in a resplendent crimson gown, made a declaration before the people of the Empire.
“In honor of Isabel’s wishes, I propose we hold the most joyous festival.”
Serna raised her goblet high.
Soldiers fired celebratory cannons into the sky, and countless musicians began performing throughout the streets.
The people of the Empire participated in the festival led by the Royal Family with joyful hearts.
“Here! Another round of drinks!”
“Hahahaha! Let’s make this the happiest week in the world!”
All the people of the Empire drank in honor of Isabel’s passing.
Just as Isabel had requested at the end, the people held a grand celebration with bread and wine.
The entire Continent was alive with festivity.
“Can we truly be this happy?”
“Isn’t this the wish of Princess Isabel? The Empress herself is so delighted—surely we should be joyful as well!”
Isabel watched those scenes and felt relief.
“I’m truly relieved.”
“Are you truly relieved?”
“…Yes.”
“You’re not disappointed?”
“What?”
“You’ve departed, and though it was your request, I’m asking if it’s truly acceptable for them to laugh and chatter so merrily in your absence.”
“It’s fine.”
“Really?”
The woman continued to gaze at me.
The brightness was so intense that I couldn’t see her face or eyes clearly, yet I felt it distinctly.
This person who can peer into the deepest corners of my heart continues to look at me.
“…A little, yes. I feel sadness too. I don’t even understand this feeling myself.”
I am certainly happy.
It’s good to see them not grieving.
Yet somewhere in a corner of my chest, a small ache was stirring.
“Child. You’re allowed to be a little more selfish.”
“…”
“If you don’t understand your own heart, who will?”
“…”
“You must become your own best friend. If you don’t truly understand your own heart, it’s you who will suffer in the end.”
I bit my lip and thought.
“I think… I wanted them to grieve a little for me.”
The feeling I’d been avoiding, thinking it made me a wicked child.
I’m going to leave anyway.
Those who depart should leave on good terms.
Those who remain must live their remaining lives.
I hope they live happily.
Another small feeling, hidden deep within that heart, peeked its head out.
The woman spoke again.
“Look at this.”
The screen changed, revealing a very dark space.
There, instead of a brilliant crimson dress, stood Serna in plain black clothing.
Serna was on her knees, weeping.
“…Mother?”
Without thinking, I rushed forward to help Serna up.
‘My hand won’t reach.’
This was merely an illusion.
Though I wanted to lift Serna, my hand could not touch her body.
“Isabel. I miss you so.”
Serna clutched a photograph of me against her chest.
The Empress who had urged the empire’s people to enjoy the festival was not here.
A mother who had lost her daughter wept in solitude, grieving in secret.
Isabel watched her and cried alongside her.
“I’m sorry. I’m truly sorry.”
Yet that voice could not reach Serna.
“I’m so sorry for dying before you, Mother.”
I wanted to rush forward and embrace her, to be held in her arms.
After a long time had passed, Serna wiped away her tears.
She practiced forcing a smile while looking at Isabel’s photograph.
“I cannot fall apart.”
She gripped her trembling lips and smiled again and again.
“If I collapse, everyone will collapse with me.”
She opened her wardrobe and slowly began to change into a magnificent crimson gown.
Isabel bit down on her lip and swallowed her tears.
If Mother discovered that I was crying here, it would only make her suffer more.
I was so happy and grateful to be your daughter.
Thank you for being my mother.
Before I could even speak those words, the scene changed.
It was another dark place.
In a small, dark space, a single figure lay prostrate.
‘Father?’
It was Ron.
He wore a black military uniform devoid of any ornament.
He sat in lotus position in a place far more secluded and dark than where Serna was.
Though he had meditated his entire life, today he could not focus on meditation.
His mind was consumed entirely by thoughts of Isabel.
“How I miss you.”
Tears streamed endlessly from Ron’s closed eyes.
He had wept so much that even his trouser legs were soaked through.
“What meaning could a world without you possibly hold for me?”
Ron bit his lip and clenched his fists tightly.
His nails dug into his palms, drawing blood.
Ron, the greatest Emperor in the history of the Sword Art Empire, had become a pitifully broken father in this place.
“All the happiness I have lived through, even if combined, cannot compare to a single moment spent with you.”
He appeared as though he might collapse at any moment.
On his smallest finger was a flower ring, crafted long ago by four-year-old Isabel.
He gazed at the flower ring endlessly and made a vow.
“First, I will not fall apart. If I collapse, everyone will collapse with me. Isabel, you would not wish for that.”
He gently pressed the flower ring to his lips.
For him now, the only thing that could lift him up was the flower ring Isabel had left behind.
Isabel could only watch their figures in silence, unable to speak.
I reached out my hand again, but it passed straight through Ron’s body.
“…Father.”
Isabel bit her lip and left her final words.
“I was afraid of you, Father.”
Of course, there was no answer.
“But now I love you so much.”
Even though he wouldn’t hear it, I confessed anyway.
“I was grateful that you were my father.”
Isabel hung her head low.
Outside, the festival rang with celebration, yet the most precious people grieved in darkness and silence.
“Did I make a wrong request and leave?”
To enjoy the festival.
I had told them to be as happy as they wished.
“My parents are pretending to be joyful outside to fulfill my request.”
And the people of the Empire were also enjoying the festivities.
“So they cannot speak of their sorrow as sorrow.”
Just as Isabel had done until now.
“They look so tormented.”
Isabel steeled her resolve and made another request.
“I don’t want to see anymore. It’s too painful. Please take me away now.”
“That cannot be.”
The woman shook her head.
“There is still much you must witness. Commit everything to memory.”
The scene shifted once more.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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