I Acted Once, and Now They Call Me a Genius - Chapter 149

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Episode 149

“How was it? Did the consolation operation succeed?”

A moment later, Seo Ryeong caught Seon-woo coming out of Seong Do-won’s dressing room and his eyes sparkled.

Seon-woo scratched his head with a slightly troubled expression.

“No. I think it failed.”

“…Really? He won’t listen even when you talk to him?”

“It’s not that he won’t listen, but rather…”

Seon-woo recalled Do-won’s last words.

‘Get lost.’

‘Excuse me?’

‘Won’t you get lost? Should I make you disappear forever?’

‘…I’ll be leaving now!’

Hmm. No matter how he thought about it, it didn’t seem like his consolation had worked.

Should he have spoken more firmly?

As he was pondering this, Seo Ryeong let out a sigh.

“Never mind. It’s his problem, so he’ll figure it out himself. Sorry. I think I made you do something unnecessary.”

“No, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”

Still, thanks to that, he did get to see something interesting.

Do-won’s appearance while acting as Seung-ho. Unlike Do-young, the way he couldn’t quite produce proper light… gave Seon-woo plenty to think about in various ways.

‘That means it’s acting with a high level of difficulty.’

Do-won had said that light was something that couldn’t be obtained through effort alone.

But as he had told Do-won, Seon-woo didn’t agree with those words. It was partly because he believed in Do-won, but…

‘There aren’t many things in the world that can’t be done.’

This was also due to Seon-woo’s basic mindset.

Just take studying, for example. At first, he would wonder when he’d ever finish studying all of this, and there were times when it felt impossible to catch up to the seniors who were far ahead, but when he came to his senses, Seon-woo had often found himself standing ahead of them instead.

‘Of course, just practicing mindlessly won’t work, so I’ll need to keep thinking about it.’

What and how could he do to produce such light?

Seon-woo raised a color orb above his palm. The sight of pitch-black darkness gathering into a sphere-like form resembling the sun, blazing intensely.

It was Seung-ho’s color orb.

Seon-woo hesitated for a moment.

He wondered if bursting this at this point might interfere with his focus on Yoon-seo.

But Seon-woo had already made Yoon-seo’s color a part of his daily life through method acting.

A brief distraction wouldn’t cause any major problems.

Seon-woo burst the color orb.

He hadn’t burst it to completely immerse himself. His understanding of Seung-ho wasn’t that high yet.

He was just groping around.

What kind of emotions did Seung-ho have?

What kind of difficult emotions were they that even Do-won had such trouble expressing them?

Just by looking into that inner world, the darkness surrounding Seung-ho clung stickily to his skin.

Inferiority complex, jealousy, longing, competitiveness, arrogance… the feeling that all sorts of emotions that sicken modern society filled his lungs with every breath he took.

He gradually forgot what it felt like to breathe.

The only thing he could look at was the sky.

In this abyss-like world… a single ray of light that uniquely shone down.

The moment he captured that light in his eyes,

“…What are you doing? Are you okay?”

Seo Ryeong’s worried voice reached him.

Startled, he turned his head to see Seo Ryeong looking at him with a somewhat unsettling expression.

“Ah, I was just thinking about Seung-ho for a moment.”

“I thought so. Your expression looked a bit scary.”

“Haha…”

What kind of expression had he been making? He didn’t know. He had been too immersed to have the capacity for expression management.

Seon-woo laughed awkwardly. Sweat had already formed on the back of his neck. To think such a reaction would come from just that brief moment of immersion.

It meant he was that tremendous of a character.

Once again, the thirst he had felt at the cinema seemed to rise up.

“Somehow… I want to try acting a role like Seung-ho someday too.”

“Well, of course. Who wouldn’t? He’s such a beautiful character.”

A beautiful character.

Some people might not understand. What could possibly be beautiful about a person who kills people and commits corruption just to get an apartment?

Seon-woo honestly didn’t understand himself either.

Seung-ho as a human being was the worst. While there might be room for understanding, he was undeniably a criminal.

Nevertheless, Seung-ho was beautiful.

More precisely, his obsession with Eden was beautiful. The feelings he had harbored his entire life, which in some ways were purer and more romantic than any love.

‘I wouldn’t have understood this in the past.’

Certainly, even when he first started acting, Seon-woo had only one reason for beginning acting.

He wanted to color his life more vibrantly.

But now, it seemed like he had come to love acting itself, separate from colors.

That’s probably why he could call a person like Seung-ho beautiful.

The past Seon-woo would have been decent compared to a human consumed by such terrible darkness.

‘What about you?’

Seon-woo raised another color orb above his palm.

This time it wasn’t Seung-ho’s. It was Yoon-seo’s.

Until now, Seon-woo had thought he’d been acting Yoon-seo quite well.

His attachment to patients, his respect for Lee Hyeok, his pure feelings for So-hee… He was confident that he hadn’t carelessly expressed any of these emotions.

But after seeing Seung-ho, he suddenly had this thought.

People who saw Seung-ho would probably never forget him for the rest of their lives.

His feelings toward Eden were so blindly devoted that it was almost miraculous. The beauty born from that blindness wasn’t something you could forget just because you wanted to.

In contrast, what about Yoon-seo?

Could Yoon-seo be remembered by people forever?

Could he leave moments in their memories that would never be erased?

‘That’s my role.’

He had to create it.

If Do-young had acted Yoon-seo, he surely would have delivered a more unforgettable performance than Seon-woo.

Thinking that way, he absolutely couldn’t settle for thinking ‘this is good enough.’

—Your acting, sometimes it felt like you were desperately trying to flap wings that don’t even exist.

Even if this was, as Do-won said, flapping wings that don’t exist, it didn’t matter.

By flapping like that, he might be able to get even a little farther from the ground. He might be able to fly in the sky, even if just for a brief moment.

If so, then he should flap.

It was while he was having such thoughts.

Seo Ryeong’s voice shattered Seon-woo’s contemplation.

“By the way, you said he failed, but it doesn’t really seem like it?”

“Pardon?”

“Look. You can tell just by looking that he’s recovered, right?”

Seo Ryeong pointed to the film set.

Do-won, who had returned to the scene at some point, was getting back into filming. With his usual deeply annoyed expression, displaying his usual colors.

He no longer showed any signs of confusion.

Seo Ryeong chuckled and asked.

“What exactly did you say to comfort him?”

* * *

Spring.

Spring was coming.

To the land of quiet mornings that had maintained its lineage for thousands of years, and also to Chungmuro, which everyone thought would dry up and die, unable to survive the long winter.

—’The Ladder of Eden’ surpasses 600,000 viewers in just one day after release!

—The reason Cannes chose it, why ‘The Ladder of Eden’ is uncomfortable

—A movie that directly pierces Korean society’s class desires

—’Eden’, exactly whose paradise is it?

[The Ladder of Eden] completely shook South Korea upon its release.

People began filling the empty cinemas, and those who had been talking about the decline of Korean cinema crossed their arms and stepped back once again.

Cheongseong was already in a festive mood.

“Wow, my little brother is now a world-class superstar, right?”

“I don’t think he’s quite a superstar yet… is he?”

“If you win an award at Cannes, you’re a superstar! What else would make you a superstar!”

Hye-seong kept giggling and clapping his hands.

As promised before, the Cheongseong family had gathered to watch [The Ladder of Eden] and were on their way out. More precisely, the Cheongseong family members who had appeared on 【I Am an Actor】.

Naturally, Min-hee and Seon-woo were with them too.

He had already watched it once with Do-won and Seo Ryeong, but… for a movie of this caliber, watching it twice was no problem at all.

‘I’d actually like to watch it several more times.’

Originally, Seon-woo was the type to rewatch his favorite movies multiple times.

Movies he could truly call life-changing films, he’d watched over ten times, and he still rewatched them often even now.

How could he watch the same movie like that? Well, they weren’t the same.

Even movies he thought he knew inside and out from watching them so many times would often make him think ‘was this scene here?’ when he watched them again.

Thanks to that, there were movies that actually became more interesting the more he rewatched them.

And it seemed [The Ladder of Eden] was one of those movies too.

Seon-woo looked down at his palm.

Perhaps still not free from the movie’s thrill, his hand was trembling.

It was because he had suddenly realized something.

‘So far.’

Do-young was quite far away from him.

He had always known this. He had thought about wanting to become like Do-young someday, but to Seon-woo, that ‘someday’ always felt like a vague and distant future.

Especially lately, while acting as Yoon-seo, Seon-woo couldn’t help but feel the gap between him and Do-young more acutely.

The more he tried to make Yoon-seo an unforgettable character like Seung-ho, the more he realized how difficult it was… how far ahead Do-young was.

‘I still don’t know how to sparkle like that.’

Yoon-seo was definitely a sparkling character.

But compared to Seung-ho, that light was somehow weak. Should he say it lacked that sharpness that seemed to pierce through the viewer’s soul?

Of course, it might be because Yoon-seo himself wasn’t such a sharp character, but Seon-woo thought Yoon-seo also had the potential to leave a powerful impact.

The reason Yoon-seo wasn’t sparkling like that now was entirely due to Seon-woo’s insufficient capabilities.

That might be why he was more reluctant about the next schedule.

“…Do we really have to watch it now?”

“Yes! How many times in life can you experience watching a live broadcast together with the actors themselves?”

Hye-seong had suddenly begged them to watch the live broadcast of [Red Zone], which wasn’t in the original plan. Even suggesting they do it at Cheongsong Theater with the other troupe members.

It just so happened that episodes 4 and 5 of [Red Zone] were scheduled to be released tonight. But showing his own acting right after seeing Do-young’s performance felt somewhat embarrassing.

It felt like it would only invite more comparisons.

“Ah, Jin-wook. Did you watch [Red Zone] too? If you haven’t seen it yet, this might be a bit awkward.”

At those words, Seon-woo turned to look at Jin-wook.

He didn’t really have high expectations. He thought there was no way Jin-wook would have bothered to watch [Red Zone] live.

However,

“I did watch it.”

“…What?”

“Well.”

“Ah, no. I just didn’t think you would have watched it, senior.”

“…I was just bored so I watched it.”

“All three episodes?”

“I was bored for over three hours. Is that not allowed?”

“Of course it’s allowed. I just…”

It was just unexpected.

He felt grateful, and strangely moved too.

As he struggled to express this feeling and just moved his lips,

“Good. Then let’s all go watch it together! The troupe kids will be happy when you come too.”

Hye-seong wrapped up the situation and led the group.

It was still embarrassing to show his acting right after seeing Do-young’s performance, but hearing “the troupe kids will be happy too,” he couldn’t bring himself to shake his head.

And Hye-seong’s words were definitely not empty talk.

“I’m, I’m, I’m a fan! Senior!”

“I really enjoyed watching your acting, senior!”

“You’re so handsome, senior!”

“…Thank you.”

As soon as he entered the theater, Seon-woo had to deal with countless handshake requests from new troupe members.

It didn’t feel like that much time had passed since he’d left the troupe, but there were quite a few new faces. It seemed the explosion of applicants to Cheongseong wasn’t just talk.

Min-hee asked in a slightly flustered voice.

“But… did everyone watch up to episode 3 of [Red Zone]? We’re planning to start from episode 4 today.”

“Of course!”

“We all gathered and watched it together last time!”

“Ah, ah… th, thank you.”

Their eyes were sparkling so much that even Min-hee was overwhelmed by their energy and started stuttering.

It couldn’t be helped. Nothing has more energy than fans meeting their star. They had already become not just seniors to them, but stars they admired or role models.

Seon-woo looked at the gazes of his juniors and thought to himself.

‘…I never thought I’d receive looks like this.’

It was a familiar gaze.

After all, he himself used to look at Do-young like that.

Even though he seemed infinitely distant, thinking that someday he wanted to become like that person.

‘I’m still nothing yet.’

Nevertheless, his juniors looked at Seon-woo with those eyes.

Seon-woo felt his shoulders growing heavy.

Having received such gazes, it felt like he couldn’t show mediocre acting from now on.

What if he had gone to see [The Ladder of Eden] and Do-young had shown subpar acting?

No, not even subpar. If he had shown acting that wasn’t as special as expected, acting that didn’t meet expectations… he would have been disappointed. No, he would have been almost shocked.

Do-young was like a role model, a signpost for Seon-woo.

If he lost his way, naturally Seon-woo would lose his way too.

Perhaps that might be the most important duty of a senior, he thought.

To move forward without wavering, so that juniors can trust and follow.

That’s probably why.

“Ah, hello, senior! My name is Yang So-ra…!”

Before watching [Red Zone], seeing the newcomer sitting beside him, Seon-woo felt a strange sense of responsibility.

Her eyes sparkled as she looked at Seon-woo, and it was obvious that she admired him quite a bit.

An expression as if even being here together like this was glorious.

Seon-woo tried to hide his embarrassment and bowed his head.

“Hello. I’m Kim Seon-woo.”

“Yes! Of course I know you, senior. I really enjoyed [Red Zone] and found it very impressive!”

“Ah, thank you.”

“I especially liked the scene where Yoon-seo has a panic attack! So I tried to imitate just that scene once, but I couldn’t get the feeling right at all.”

Yang So-ra answered while slightly avoiding Seon-woo’s gaze.

She wasn’t usually shy, but she couldn’t muster the courage to look directly into Seon-woo’s eyes.

Even when she saw him through the screen, she thought he really shone, but seeing him in person like this… she could really feel what a celebrity’s aura was like.

It was fascinating in a new way. She thought that coming to Cheongseong, she might see Seon-woo or Min-hee someday, but she never imagined she’d be able to have a conversation sitting right next to him like this.

…Well, this was thanks to Ye-chan, who knew she had become a fan of Seon-woo and arranged for her to sit next to him.

‘Thank you, Ye-chan senior. You’re the best.’

While making such a fuss internally, Yang So-ra desperately tried to act well-behaved and suppressed the various gushing comments that had risen to her throat.

She couldn’t give a weird impression to a senior she was meeting for the first time.

Watching her like this, Seon-woo asked an unexpected question.

“When you were practicing that, what did you focus on?”

“Um… wanting to overcome it?”

“Mm, that’s good too. But if you had focused on how Yoon-seo always thinks only of her patients, it might have been a bit easier to act. There are things you feel when you make it clear that both wanting to overcome the panic and the panic attacks themselves are all because of the patients.”

“Ah…”

Sora’s eyes sparkled.

It was good insight. It wasn’t that she hadn’t been conscious of it at all, but having Seon-woo directly point out the core like this made that emotional line feel more visible.

She hadn’t expected such a kind explanation, and just as she was about to hurriedly express her gratitude.

“And even in front of that panic, Yoon-seo can’t just feel scared. It should feel like she wants to somehow overcome that panic to face her patients, but no matter how hard she tries, she can’t do it. Not being passively swept away by the panic, but feeling like she wants to fight against it.”

“That, that makes sense. Definitely…”

“I think it’s also important to never stop thinking about your role. Why are patients so important to Yoon-seo? What do patients mean to Yoon-seo? Is her desire to save patients because she’s afraid of death, or because life is precious? It might seem like pointless thinking, but over time, all of that seeps into your acting.”

“Wow…”

“And…”

Seon-woo continued speaking with sparkling eyes.

As if talking about acting itself was the greatest joy to him, his eyes were now sparkling with a feeling similar to Yoon-seo’s.

Sora stared at Seon-woo in a daze.

She thought she understood. How this person could act like that. How he could become an actor who captivates people’s attention like that.

It was probably because he himself was someone who couldn’t see anything but acting.

More than all the countless words Seon-woo was explaining now, this sparkle he was showing felt like it was teaching Sora much more.

She felt like she knew what kind of attitude she should have as an actor going forward.

‘I’m glad I came to Cheongseong.’

She couldn’t help but think that naturally.

Just being able to experience this moment made coming to Cheongseong the right decision a hundred times over.

“Ah. And there’s one more thing I’d like to tell you…”

…But, at this point, should I be paying tuition fees?

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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