Debut or Die - Chapter 63

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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A Fatal Illness if I Don’t Debut – Episode 63
“…I will recruit a new team member.”
“Ah!! Park Moon-dae’s choice has been revealed!”
At the MC’s cry, the prize money section vanished from the large screen, and the text 【New Member Recruitment!】 expanded to fill it completely.
The audience’s cheers and the judges clapping their hands in delight appeared on another display screen.
I nearly clenched my teeth.
‘Thirty-nine million won….’
Gone into thin air.
But looking at it long-term, it was an unavoidable choice.
Adding another participant meant the group would gain more fans. And this kind of growth typically multiplies rather than simply adds. The scale of money we could earn would be completely different.
In the long run, it was an investment that could earn more than five thousand.
The problem came next.
“Then, which participant did Park Moon-dae choose as the final member?”
The remaining participants tensed again, visible on the large screen.
“The participant I chose is….”
No matter who I picked, this was the perfect moment to earn resentment from the fans of the eliminated participants.
So I dodged it.
“The seventh-ranked participant selected by our shareholders.”
“Ah!”
The murmur of the crowd grew louder. Most seemed to accept it or feel relieved.
‘…Even the production team seems pleased.’
That’s a bit irritating.
“Park Moon-dae, who entrusted the choice to our shareholders!”
The MC glanced at the prompter and enthusiastically continued the proceedings, and soon the seventh-ranked candidate appeared on the large screen.
And the one who made it was….
“Congratulations! Lee Sae-jin!”
I nearly choked.
‘How did she skyrocket like this.’
It seemed she benefited from the text votes of people who had only voted in the final episode, likely because her public recognition was high from her child actress work.
‘…There’s nothing I can do about it.’
It was already spilled milk. I stumbled aside to make room for Lee Sae-jin as she climbed onto the platform.
“…Thank you.”
Lee Sae-jin barely squeezed out her gratitude and said a few more words before bowing her head deeply. It was enough that her fans could cover for her by saying she hadn’t expected this.
The MC guided Lee Sae-jin to join the successful candidates. As she passed by me, she murmured quietly.
“…Thanks.”
I simply nodded. So she did want to make it.
‘I want to go in too.’
My legs were starting to cramp.
How much longer are they planning to keep me standing?
Yet the MC continued the proceedings with me still standing beside him.
“Now, the only thing left is one! The group name for the participants who will debut through Idol Stock Company!”
A mundane explanation followed about how they had gathered shareholders’ opinions through the Website.
And then a dazzling logo appeared on the large display screen.
A capital ‘T’ and a triangle whose top didn’t quite touch merged subtly together, with flashy sparkle effects bouncing from both sides and the top before settling into a small diamond mark.
-Your verified investment.
-Your idol, your star
-TEST + STAR
-【TeSTAR】
“The group name selected by our shareholders is… TeSTAR!”
“….”
The name had changed.
From what I knew, the original name for the male idol group debuting through this program was ‘STier’.
I saw it listed as a candidate on the Website with ‘Star + Tier’ plastered right there as the explanation, so I thought it would be that again this time.
Since the members had changed quite a bit, including me, a different name came out.
It seemed the name had been decided by the narrowest of margins last time.
‘…Wouldn’t STier have been better?’
I never expected to end up with a group name where ‘Star’ takes up more than half of it.
It felt a bit awkward, but… well, as long as the group name wasn’t too strange, it was fine.
“The seven members of TeSTAR will each receive a trophy engraved with the group logo!”
Then Young-rin came up and handed me the trophy. There was only one trophy, shaped like a graph soaring toward the sky.
‘So that’s what they set this up for.’
I guess I just need to transport it and hand it over to the others.
“Congratulations.”
“Thank you.”
I shook hands lightly with Young-rin, then received the trophy along with its cushion.
Young-rin looked at me with calm eyes, smiling gently.
“I hope you have a great career ahead.”
“Yes. Thank you.”
I muttered my thanks repeatedly. Then I quickly walked toward where the successful candidates were standing.
Caught up in the atmosphere, they had already jumped to their feet.
“Wow!”
“They’re giving us a trophy too?!”
I handed the trophy over to the first person I saw without hesitation.
Then they all crowded around the trophy, linking arms and making a fuss together.
‘My shoulder hurts.’
The area around my back ached from alternating blows from Cha Yu-jin and Big Sae-jin.
There wasn’t a spot from my shoulders to my feet that didn’t tingle, but thanks to the adrenaline, my mind remained sharp.
I heard the MC’s voice from a distance away.
“Congratulations on TeSTAR’s debut!”
Fireworks for stage effects burst brilliantly. Wedged between the trophy and the successful candidates, I heard the audience’s cheers.
And in that moment.
A status window popup appeared.
[Successful Debut!]
You have successfully debuted through a famous Audition Program!
!Time Limit: Satisfied (Grand Success)
!Abnormal Status: ‘Debut or Death’ removed!
: Verify Truth ☜ Click!]
‘…Really?’
I opened the status window.
The abnormal status had vanished.
“….”
It was over.
For some reason, it didn’t feel real.
Perhaps it was because I’d been tormented by an ominous premonition that the status window’s purpose was unclear, and the abnormal status might somehow be extended through sheer force.
‘I never thought it would disappear so cleanly.’
I stared blankly at the status window and closed it. Then the text at the very bottom of the remaining popup caught my eye.
The position where rewards should normally be listed.
‘…Wait.’
What was this.
[: Verify Truth ☜ Click!]
Truth?
I reflexively clicked on that text.
“Park Moon-dae?”
In an instant, my vision distorted.
Then, darkness.

* * *
A gaunt high school student lay sprawled across a worn mattress, clutching a battered smartphone.
Each movement produced a creaking groan from the mattress beneath me.
The cracked screen displayed a YouTube video playing in low resolution—the result of barely maintaining a connection to the shared Wi-Fi.
Yet despite the poor quality, the singer’s charisma shone through brilliantly, a testament to the camera operator’s skillful work.
‘That was fun.’
Park Moon-dae watched the final frames of the video with a pang of regret.
The latest direct camera footage on this account had just concluded with ‘2X0412 Reload Hangang Water Reduction Festival.’
The account ‘Gun1234’ primarily uploaded direct camera footage of singers and idols.
It focused especially on lesser-known performers, yet somehow made them all look impressive.
‘It feels like they’re giving them recognition.’
There was something deeply satisfying about supporting people who seemed unremarkable to the world.
‘I wish they’d upload more often.’
Free ways to spend time happily were becoming increasingly rare.
The same held true for YouTube, where I could watch by sitting through ads.
Videos that made my heart race were almost nonexistent—not with this constantly dropping Wi-Fi and the resulting poor quality.
I’d heard that direct camera footage generated almost no revenue since the ad money went entirely to the performers, yet I was grateful they uploaded consistently anyway.
After deliberating, Park Moon-dae scrolled down and wrote a comment.
-BigMoon: Gun1234, I always enjoy watching your direct camera footage. Thank you for uploading.
I knew this account had never given special feedback to viewers before.
Even when Young-rin’s direct camera footage went viral, they hadn’t left a single comment.
But they might be watching, so I checked my spelling carefully and hit post.
-This person shows up every time lol
-Seems like a true fan
A few replies came in, and I felt slightly embarrassed.
I considered responding but suddenly lost the motivation and stopped.
‘There’s nothing I’d say anyway….’
Whenever I tried to talk about myself, the words wouldn’t come.
The silence in this room—I couldn’t even call it a home—pressed down heavily.
There was no such thing as daily life.
When I tried to remember the last time I’d done anything with genuine enthusiasm, all I could recall was when everything was normal.
When my parents were still here.
It felt like yesterday, yet years had actually passed.
And I seemed to have been buried somewhere all this time. Or perhaps I was simply dreaming.
Maybe that’s why I found myself so drawn to the videos this account uploaded, I thought.
Watching people sing and dance with passion despite circumstances showing no signs of improvement—it was comforting, a kind of vicarious satisfaction.
‘…Well then.’
Tomorrow would probably be Monday.
Park Moon-dae stirred slightly on the mattress and closed my eyes right there.
And time continued to flow. Unlike everything around me that changed and shifted, I remained somehow perpetually the same.
Something terrible happened at High School. I stopped doing it, so that’s what I did.
Even after stopping, nothing changed.
Well, then, if I stop living too, wouldn’t that be the same?
‘I suppose so.’
But I didn’t particularly want to die.
Park Moon-dae found a part-time job, but soon the work dried up.
And the video uploads from ‘gun1234’ stopped too.
‘Why…?’
Park Moon-dae pondered this, and eventually sent a message using the account information. It was the day he failed to find a new part-time job.
Naturally, no reply came.
‘….’
And shortly after, all the videos on the account disappeared.
Only a short message remained on the empty page.
========================
[Quitting to play games. Later.]
========================
Games.
Park Moon-dae downloaded a mobile game. He didn’t have the money for a desktop or gaming console.
But his old smartphone couldn’t properly run mobile games, and it broke after terrible overheating.
“….”
Park Moon-dae felt, for some reason, utterly exhausted.
Even though I hadn’t done anything, there was nothing to be exhausted about.
‘I’m exhausted.’
Living itself exhausted me.
Park Moon-dae canceled his broken smartphone. And he didn’t renew the lease on his shabby single room either.
For the first time in a long while, I had a proper meal. With that, the money in my pocket was just right.
It meant renting a Motel and buying sleeping pills would be the end.
‘They say many people die in Motels.’
It was too cold to jump into water or climb a mountain. I felt like I’d give up halfway.
If I died in my own room, it would probably rot after being left alone for over a month.
‘I’m sorry.’
As Park Moon-dae rented the room, he repeatedly apologized internally to the gruff landlord.
Then, after entering the room, I lay on the bed and swallowed the sleeping pills.
Sleep came like death.
“….”
A moment later.
“Ugh….”
It was on the filthy Motel bed that I opened my eyes, breathing in….
It was me.

* * *
“Hah.”
I exhaled sharply.
“Are you… okay?”
Someone beside me patted my back. When I turned my head, I saw Sun Ah-hyun’s worried face.
“…Just a moment. I’m exhausted.”
I barely managed to brush it off and straightened my posture.
It seemed almost no time had passed. As a result, I must have appeared to stumble for a moment.
Because the successful candidates surrounded me, the others didn’t seem to notice at all, and the atmosphere remained unchanged.
I wiped away the cold sweat. My mind was in chaos.
The owner of the video account that Park Moon-dae originally liked—’gun1234′.
‘That’s me.’
It was an account I had deleted when I started preparing for the civil service exam.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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