Debut or Die - Chapter 394

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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A Fatal Illness if I Don’t Debut – Episode 394
Lee Sae-jin realized she was living a successful life.
She had broken through competition odds of hundreds to one to become a trainee at a major entertainment agency, survived fiercely within it, and ultimately debuted.
Among the dozens of idol groups that debuted that year, she received the best results and even won the Rookie of the Year award—everything was proceeding smoothly.
‘Objectively… it’s success.’
She had naturally expected to be happy. A golden age filled with a sense of achievement.
But they say the scenery changes when your position changes.
‘It’s ridiculous.’
It was strange how she could be anxious and suffocated at the same time, every single day.
Teammates trapped in routine, the company’s half-baked new plans, opinions that hit walls and disappeared.
Seeing what needed to be fixed but being unable to do anything about it drained all motivation from her.
-Hey, Lee Sae-jin, take it easy, will you? Can’t you read the mood? I’m so damn tired.
-…Oh, yeah, I know it’s tiring… But if we do it now, tomorrow will be easier, right? Let’s just go one more time~
She understood that reality and dreams were different. The frustration that had been boiling over had long since cooled.
Yet sometimes, for no reason, she felt wronged.
When moving between schedules, when preparing an album, when catching brief sleep in the early morning hours.
‘….’
That feeling of being cheated would suddenly arrive and settle irritatingly in her chest.
Perhaps that’s why. The words of this survival participant she’d only recently met struck right at her core.
-You just didn’t notice, but your effort created valuable results elsewhere.
Effort and achievement. The restoration of that cycle.
It probably wasn’t those exact words. But that’s how it sounded.
‘What am I expecting?’
It could have just been some trivial psychology test floating around on social media somewhere. No, it probably was.
He must have said it to clear the air when things suddenly felt strange during the concert.
Yet she had rushed at it seriously, unable to hold back.
-Try it.
As if some button had been pressed.
‘What am I doing, really.’
Yet she had no intention of taking it back. Lee Sae-jin closed her mouth and stared at Ryu Gun-woo before her.
“….”
Ryu Gun-woo neither laughed awkwardly at the sudden silence nor opened his mouth to respond.
Instead, he raised his hand.
‘…?’
And then, in the empty air, a strange motion followed—as if he were touching something….
-…!!
“Ah.”
In that instant, sensation exploded like fireworks from within her mind.
The feeling of a water current that had been blocked by a dam suddenly breaking through.
Everything that had been there originally rushed back into place.
-Thanks again for stopping me from getting off.
-Ah, our group is so good though?
-Testa is going all the way to contract renewal. You all believe, right~?
Memories and emotions flooded my mind. Feelings that once seemed inevitable, countless memories forged at life’s crossroads, pain, excitement, inferiority, fulfillment, victory.
Achievement.
My own place.
-I wish the Seoul Concert had gone on for just one more day.
-Right! We can do it!
-Let’s stop talking about impossible things and just pack up….
-Uh…. Park Moon-dae, you’re disappointed too, right?
-…I’m not not disappointed.
-See, everyone feels the same way? The Company messed up~ It was way too short~
In that moment, Big Sae-jin realized the source of the helplessness he felt.
‘Because I’ve lived the dream.’
That was it.
I had already lived a life where effort was rewarded with achievement.
I understood that even hitting rock bottom, I could recover and challenge again, and that this final challenge might succeed….
A life where I knew what it felt like to work passionately alongside people worthy of trust and respect.
“….”
The dizzying flood of emotions had ended.
Lee Sae-jin lifted her head. She could see her friend’s face, quietly watching her with concern.
A real teammate after so long.
‘My effort’s result exists elsewhere.’
How unlike him to speak in such a subtly persuasive way.
“That’s true.”
He was right.
The achievement Lee Sae-jin had created with all her might was somewhere else.
“It was… somewhere else.”
And it had always been that way.
“Ah~ Park Moon-dae, how do you always say the right thing?”
“…!”
Lee Sae-jin laughed loudly.
The feeling of seeing Ryu Gun-woo—no, Park Moon-dae—whose eyes widened in surprise at being understood, was indescribably pleasant.
What surpassed the confusion and curiosity about this incomprehensibly surreal situation was….
A refreshing sense of relief.

* * *
Lee Sae-jin had transformed back into Big Sae-jin in an instant.
I’d thought I might need to persuade him through a prolonged identity crisis since he’d already debuted with another group, but….
“Moon-dae, I’m surprised you recognized me right away!”
[Huh.]
He just snapped back like I’d flipped a switch.
He didn’t even stumble. He simply had his head bowed, then lifted it suddenly.
And the moment he saw Ryu Gun-woo’s form, he immediately deduced the Park Moon-dae he knew, now leaning against the sofa and chuckling.
“Ah~ how did you do this? Did you use some kind of… nanomachine or something to restore my memories?”
“Where did you see something like that?”
“A webtoon?”
I fell silent watching him laugh as if he’d caught a manic episode.
What… did I touch something wrong?
[You must be happy about this!]
Is that so?
Then… life at Zairop must have been more of a mess than expected. If that’s the case….
…maybe spending all my fame points wasn’t such a bad choice after all.
I watched him gradually regain his composure and quietly opened my mouth.
“First, let me explain what’s happening, so listen.”
“Ah~ I should listen.”
Since he already knew the situation, I skipped ahead and started with the system malfunction.
He could have complained that it was a pointless act or made a fuss about how cringey it was, but he simply listened to my explanation seriously.
Still, since he was someone who played games, he seemed to understand the concept of fame experience points used here quite well.
Thanks to that, I was able to finish my story.
Or rather, I was planning to finish it.
“So… I just recruited you with the fame I gathered…!”
The moment I told him I’d recruited him, he almost attempted a sudden embrace—if he hadn’t.
That’s the kind of action you’d do at touching moments like first place or a concert, but to see it here….
“Thank you.”
“…!”
“Actually, you didn’t even need to snap me back to my senses. I’ve already debuted with another group… we can’t work together anyway.”
“….”
It seemed his worries ran deeper than I’d thought.
In any case, I’m sorry, but what I did wasn’t charity.
I tapped his back.
“No, I’m going to use you as a spy.”
“…??”
“Let me hear about the current state of the music industry from someone who’s already debuted.”
Big Sae-jin’s expression went blank, but he soon burst out laughing.
Man.
“Hahaha! Is that really what you came up with? Ugh, Moon-dae, how can you be so honest about everything~”
What are you talking about? In this strange world where timelines are jumbled, even Chung-ryeo’s knowledge isn’t complete, so gathering more information is always beneficial.
“Alright, alright. Sae-jin will tell us lots of information~ and promote us, get us on variety shows!”
He grinned widely.
“There we go, right? Moon-dae, doesn’t that put your mind at ease?”
“Yeah, do it properly.”
Stop laughing, you bastard.
I was considering whether to play that Zairop debut-era morning call video for this guy and make him scream.
Ding-ding-ding.
“We’re back!”
The door opened and the guys who had gone shopping returned.
Big Sae-jin jumped to his feet.
“Oh~ our members!”
“…! Sae-jin’s back?”
“Ohhhh! Welcome back!”
At the returning cheers, Big Sae-jin bursts out laughing.
“Wait, you’re telling the person who stayed home ‘welcome back’? You too, welcome back Eugene!”
“Hehe! Hyung!”
Ryu Chung-woo, who came in past the two of them, spoke cheerfully as he set down groceries on the table.
“Sae-jin made it sound like he might not get his memories back. So that’s why you called him today?”
“No, it’s a probability issue… and even if we pick someone else, we can’t exactly tell an active member to disband.”
Then Big Sae-jin began exaggerating his cries.
“Ugh… Moon-dae, if you knew how much Sae-jin suffered, you really couldn’t say such things? Really… you wouldn’t say something like ‘active member’?”
“Why.”
He forgot his act and turned serious.
“Hey, even working with guys who deserve to fail is torture.”
“…? ‘Deserve to fail’ is a bit….”
“No. These guys really should fail!”
“….”
You’re going down with them anyway, so what are you talking about?
Anyway, he seemed unwilling to compromise on that, so I didn’t bother trying to convince him. Whether Zairop gets criticized or not, I couldn’t care less.
Instead, the conversation shifted to what the other Testa members and I had been up to.
We talked while eating grilled pork belly from the pan, the conversation piling up naturally.
“Wow~ you even exchanged numbers with Ah-hyun in the meantime? Moon-dae, aren’t you being too discriminatory? Did you ask Ah-hyun first?”
“Would I have?”
Sun Ah-hyun asked first, you idiot.
I recalled the Sun Ah-hyun of this place, who I’d sent a landscape photo to once, then erased the memory.
I wanted to stop thinking about it, but Big Sae-jin seemed to have other ideas.
“The three of us could go out again soon~ you said we just need you to win the award.”
His dreams are quite ambitious.
“Who’s dog is the target named after? I’ll catch on quick.”
He chuckles with a smirk.
“Just aim for a music source target.”
“…!”
“Why, you’ve got Kim Rae-bin~ Can’t you just patch together one of the target songs and pull it out? Since this place is like a dream anyway, you don’t have to worry about plagiarism or anything like that.”
Cha Yu-jin answered confidently with a slightly deflated expression.
“Kim Rae-bin has no memory of it.”
“Huh? But how did he participate in the survival show…. …You just brought him along.”
“….”
“Geez… our poor Rae-bin, I hope he doesn’t get scammed anywhere. You really hooked him~”
The guy who would’ve been the first to scam in a similar situation clicking his tongue in disapproval is somehow irritating.
“So now it’s just Rae-bin and Ah-hyun left. What’s this, am I picking people up late? How could you commit such a heinous act of leaving my best friend in another group….”
“It’s random, I’m telling you.”
There’s nothing I can do about it, you bastard.
I ate a late-night snack while dealing with the guy who kept needling me.
The conversation didn’t end and there was nothing particularly special about it. …To the point where it felt like I’d already gone back.
Of course, I hadn’t actually gone back, so the conversation went this far.
“So Sae-jin is planning to continue preparing for Zairop’s comeback for now, right?”
At Ryu Chung-woo’s question, Big Sae-jin took a sip of water.
“I… wow, there’s so much to do.”
“…?”
“Ah, so I was 20 years old here too. Really soft-hearted, kind~ Moon-dae was honestly moved too, so kind, right?”
“What?”
“Really. Lost out a lot.”
The fact that such words came from this efficiency-obsessed guy’s mouth….
“…You have some plan.”
He smirked.
“Yeah. First I’m going to stop by the salon.”
“…?”
“Why?”
“I’m going to dye my hair.”
And the next morning.
The guy who’d stayed up almost all night chatting and playing apparently stopped by the assigned salon at dawn and changed his dyed hair back to black.
Big Sae-jin: If we bleach it again, even Sae-jin’s tough hair will all dissolve, you know? Yes yes, absolutely impossible haha.
It’s absolutely not something a mere third-year rookie idol could pull off on their own right before a comeback.
But Big Sae-jin did it. That guy who’d developed his social skills to the extreme.
And after returning to the dormitory that way… he apparently did something.
[Lee Sae-jin : Doing whatever my heart desires (U▿U~♪)]
I’ll just say that every time I checked during that half day, this emoji appeared more than half the time.
And evening.
-Big Sae-jin: Oh, thank you so much for the invitation. These are all familiar names.
He had just joined Testa’s group chat, which now had five members.
And the moment he recovered his memories, the namesake who had done something similar reacted like this.
-Bae Sae-jin hyung: (welcoming hamster emoji)
I was surprised at how well they seemed to get along.
And honestly, I thought Big Sae-jin would feel embarrassed about what Bae Sae-jin had said when they met while he had no memories.
-Keun Se-jin: Oh brother, didn’t you and Moon Dae make fun of me so naturally last time? Haha.
I never expected him to bring it up himself. He was still himself.
Big Sae-jin: Haha, I was surprised that you still have no mercy in the way you speak. I’m only 20 years old and I was so flustered that the ribs almost went up my nose.
-Bae Sae-jin hyung: No
-Bae Sae-jin hyung: I’m only like that when playing psychopath roles
It didn’t seem to be what he meant, but in any case, Big Sae-jin sent a laughing bear emoji.
I pressed the keyboard.
-Did you make good use of the dyed hair?
-Big Sae-jin: Yeah, please look forward to Zairop’s next activities^^
Whatever he did, it seemed like one of two things would happen—either Zairop’s lifespan would be extended or drastically shortened.
Big Sae-jin enjoyed the cheers from Cha Yu-jin and Bae Sae-jin before changing the subject.
-Big Sae-jin: Anyway, Moon-dae needs to become famous so the other members remember…? That’s how it works, right?
Did he really need to leave that in text form…?
Big Sae-jin: Hurry up and become famous so you get invited to the group chat. I’ll support you in every way I can lol
-Big Sae-jin: I’ll let the unit activities without Sae-jin slide just this once, but when you come back, Sae-jin has to be center
-Bae Sae-jin hyung: ?
-Big Sae-jin: No, not you hyung, me
This time Cha Yu-jin sent a basic laughing emoji. The comedy was something else.
[Hyung’s expression has improvedㅠㅠ I guess he’s in a good mood!]
Is that so?
There’s nothing wrong with that. I chuckled softly and watched the group chat where pointless chatter was passing through.
‘Maybe I should just leave it alone.’
The main topic finally came from Bae Sae-jin’s mouth a moment later.
-Bae Sae-jin hyung: So… about your survival show.
-Bae Sae-jin hyung: It’s the final live broadcast now, right?
That’s right. After escaping the tempest in a teacup through various provocations and stage promotions, the LeTi survival show was now approaching its final broadcast.
‘I heard there’s one more elimination announcement during practice, though.’
I nodded readily.
-Yes, there aren’t many days left.
-Bae Sae-jin hyung: I’ll cheer you on
“…?”
Is he being sincere?
‘No… should I show signs of familiarity from now on?’
No matter what, you’ve been on a mysterious image strategy until now. Are you sure about this? Your psychopath image will definitely fade, though.
Won’t his agency or related people try to stop him?
And an immediate response came back.
-Bae Sae-jin: Go ahead and do it
-Big Sae-jin: (surprised bear emoji)
That’s cool! That’s awesome!
They were all having a great time joking around.
-Ryu Chung-woo: (sweating and laughing emoji)
-Ryu Chung-woo: Anyway, let’s give it our all for the finals too. This reminds me of Ajusa
‘Ajusa?’
I let out a hollow laugh. No matter what, there was no way the finals could be as insane as that crazy program.
“Ha.”
Then, a voice came from beyond the wall.
“Hyung, were you laughing after reading my message?”
“…No, I was looking at Big Sae-jin.”
Now that I thought about it, Ryu Chung-woo was in the room right next to mine.
I quietly closed my mouth and focused on the messages.
-Yes (puppy emoji) Let’s do our best
Never imagining that something insane would actually happen at the finals.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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