Debut or Die - Chapter 388

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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A Fatal Illness if I Don’t Debut – Episode 388
The day Wise filming resumed.
This time, instead of filming the CEO offering commentary from the stage, we went straight into the main content right after announcing the Honor Class and Inferior Class at the Dormitory.
‘The idol event that happens before the stage performance where eliminations occur.’
Following the public service announcement and pictorial shoot, the next event was….
“This event is a guerrilla concert on the street.”
“Wow!”
“Seriously….”
I had a suspicion there was some kind of deal between the local government and the production, but regardless, it meant we’d be performing on a temporary stage setup right in the heart of Myeongdong.
[Oh, this should be fun!]
The viewers might think so. But from a participant’s perspective… it’s complicated.
[Wait…? Weren’t we supposed to perform stages we’ve already done before?]
That’s true.
‘But the lineup has changed.’
With eliminations and new members, there would be significant modifications to formations and parts.
“This coming Friday at 6 PM!”
Look at that—they’re only giving us two days.
‘They’re basically saying work through the night.’
[…. Extreme labor….]
So this time, overtime is guaranteed.
No matter how quickly those of us with experience can pick things up, we can’t go in early and sleep. We have to coordinate all the formations together.
‘Of course, there’s someone who’ll have to work even harder than me.’
The guy talking to me while I’m unpacking my things on the bed. He’s essentially the one leading the choreography practice for this Entertainment Agency’s Debut Group.
“Welcome back, hyung. I knew you’d be here soon, really.”
“Yeah, thanks.”
Shin Jae-hyun, who warmly welcomes Ryu Gun-woo back to the Honor Class after today’s filming, extends his hand without turning away from the camera.
‘He really doesn’t miss an opportunity.’
I shake hands with Chung-ryeo, my neighbor who has never once unpacked his things from the Honor Class bedroom, and we get a cut scene.
‘Is this guy planning to maintain this image?’
The perfect leader position—someone who has never fallen from the Honor Class.
If he maintains that level of consistency, it does become a narrative and solidifies his character.
“The class the program assigned us is just a momentary division. Regardless of that, let’s think of ourselves as all debuting together and work hard.”
“Yes…!”
I wonder how many times he’s used that touching line by now.
I spent those two days watching him meticulously care for other trainees while pushing them to their limits.
And then the day arrived.
[Ooh…! There are already so many people gathered?]
Well, that’s natural for something called a guerrilla concert announced only three hours in advance.
As soon as it spread on the Internet, viewers came rushing.
‘Even without that, quite a few tourists had gathered.’
Since it was Myeongdong, foreign K-pop enthusiasts were everywhere.
This was still an era when there was a preference for capturing images of foreigners cheering—a trend that certainly benefited certain parties.
Regardless of whether it was a long time coming or a first-time experience, the participants were visibly excited standing before the open-air stage.
“Let’s chant our slogan once before we go up.”
“Yes I am! Wise fighting!”
And then we climbed onto the small stage that had just hosted a violin recital from a nearby university.
Waaah!
Raw cheers. Unfiltered, primal reactions ranging from chants of support to screams.
Sunlight, wind, scent.
Performing outdoors in the open air after so long had its own distinct flavor.
‘It feels like we’re doing a promotional event.’
Of course, the setlist was filled entirely with other people’s songs rather than our familiar ones, which gave it an odd sensation.
And it seemed I wasn’t the only one feeling this way.
Outside the backstage camera area.
“I miss it.”
Ryu Chung-woo, a fifth-year idol who had managed to both create a theme song and fill in for an absent team member in just two days, muttered under his breath.
Cha Yu-jin grumbled.
“I want to perform our song.”
Both of them had mastered the art of speaking without subjects, just in case the microphone picked them up. I nodded slowly.
“Gun-woo hyung!”
“Hmm?”
Kim Rae-bin, who had been warming up beside me, whispered to me with a serious expression.
Now that I thought about it, this guy didn’t even remember, so maybe I’d given him an unnecessarily suspicious impression….
“Is there any possibility the theme song could be suddenly removed from the setlist?”
“…?”
“If the ‘our song’ that Cha Yu-jin referred to is the song for the group performance that we all do together, then it would be the theme song. But the phrase ‘want to perform’ presupposes that we’re currently not performing it.”
“….”
“Then the conclusion would be that it was removed from the setlist….”
I barely managed to open my mouth.
“He probably just means he wants to do it soon. We’re doing the theme song last anyway.”
“…! Ah, I see! Thank you for the kind explanation.”
He’s truly one of a kind. It’s almost a shame the camera didn’t catch that.
‘If I had my memories, I’d definitely be suffering from guilt, thinking it wasn’t fair, and it would show all over my face.’
Either way, I’d have to awaken Kim Rae-bin after this program ended, even if he was eliminated in the next teammate selection.
The mini concert continued, filling the full fifty minutes.
The death match stage with Jin Chae-yul, which I had performed in a marine look, was also recreated fairly late in the show.
Of course, it wasn’t the marine look—I wore a baseball jacket instead—but in the end, the CEO, compromising with public opinion, couldn’t remove the song from the list and included it anyway.
Truly a capitalistic decision befitting an entertainment agency CEO.
Chae Yul seemed genuinely excited, as if he simply felt acknowledged.
“CEO Kim Tae-in must have recognized its true value after seeing our stage several times! Maybe he’ll love this stage the moment he sees it….”
“That’s right, that’s right!”
The way I was giggling with Shin O was exactly like how VTIC used to be.
Whenever this guy’s bright, carefree side shows up on broadcast, he seems to gain fans. He looks so natural and unforced.
Even back when I was in VTIC, the data capturing these kinds of moments seemed valuable… Well, anyway, he’s definitely got solid appeal.
‘He’ll do fine.’
I quickly reached my conclusion, then waved to the crowd before stepping down from the stage.
And as the performance drew to a close.
“Thank you!”
Kyaaaah! Ahhhhh!
Once we finished the theme song performance, the crowd had swelled so much it was blocking the walkways. It was pure crowd psychology—the cheers feeding into more cheers.
‘Honestly, it’s kind of fun just hearing them cheer….’
Gun-woo! Ahhh, you’re so handsome!
Yes… Thank you.
Either way, I reacted to each shout-out as it came. Nobody dislikes being complimented.
After the camera had captured enough of the crowd’s enthusiasm.
A surprise event that hadn’t been announced to the participants finally kicked off.
“We’d like to invite our passionate viewers who came to today’s guerrilla concert up onto the stage~”
“Huh!”
“Right now?”
It was a surprise fan meeting.
‘I had a feeling this would happen.’
I’d noticed before coming up on stage that they’d separated out a few people and moved them to the front.
“Hmm.”
“Welcome… just come on up like this.”
Watching the participants’ faces light up with excitement and nervousness, I shook my head inwardly.
‘It’s been a while.’
Ever since I got hit with a plastic bottle at my debut showcase, I’d barely done any spontaneous drawings or random selections with unspecified crowds, worried something might happen.
Soon, people started coming up in groups of two or three. Each headed toward the participant they were supporting.
“Wow! What do I do!”
“Just come over here and say hello to me.”
“Ahhh!”
I came up on stage and shook hands with the few people approaching me, giving light hugs.
Most of them were trembling—whether from excitement or nervousness, it was hard to tell. That’s probably because we’re in public. This isn’t really that different from when I was Park Moon-dae.
So what’s the difference then?
“Ohhh, you’re so handsome….”
“Thank you. …I’ll take good care of myself…?”
“Ah, this is so good….”
‘Handsome’ is overwhelmingly more frequent than ‘cute.’
And… they’re not really asking for cheek pinches or anything like that.
‘…Maybe it’s because it’s a random drawing.’
Or maybe it’s not just idol fanatics with deep pockets—maybe it’s because this is being broadcast. I can’t say for sure, but the atmosphere feels more cautious somehow.
In other words, a bit less comfortable.
‘…Maybe it’s because Ryu Gun-woo has a bad impression.’
Not that I’m disappointed, though.
Regardless, the Production Team had invited people carefully enough that no single participant was left without attention.
Even Ryu Chung-woo, who’d barely had his appearance aired recently, still had people approaching him.
[This kind of thing… when you look back on it a few years later, you realize it was actually an incredibly lucky experience, right?]
Yeah, I can’t be stuck here for a few more years.
[Oh.]
Whenever there was no one in front of me, I’d chat with this guy and wait for the next person.
“We’ll invite the last group now~”
And when the three or four people who’d waited the longest came up on stage.
“…!!”
I immediately recognized the first person to step onto the stage.
That person was….
[Huh? Your fan!]
That’s right.
Me—in other words, I was someone who used to be a fan of Testa’s Park Moon-dae. How did I recognize them?
‘…Because they were my first target.’
The first Home Ma who’d intensely requested a close-up shot of me at the Ajusa press conference.
And I’d run into them again when I went for the advertisement board verification wearing a dog mask. At this point, it’s hard to forget, and I’d kept seeing them consistently after that.
[Wow~ I’m seeing you here too!]
…Yeah.
I tensed up the posture I’d almost relaxed and maintained my expression.
‘If I acknowledge them, I’m an idiot.’
Just stay quiet. Stay quiet.
[I’m so happy to see you! I only saw you when you were in that status window!]
Since this guy was making a fuss on my behalf, there was no need for me to do anything more.
And that fan approached the participants standing on stage with quite an energetic stride, coming right up to where I was.
And then walked past me.
“Hello!”
…Toward the spot next to me, where Jin Chae-yul was standing.
“I’m really, truly rooting for you. You’re so cute and cool and the best. Do everything you want to do, Chae-yul.”
“Oh wow! Thank you so much!”
“….”
I quietly adjusted my standing posture.
Ryu Gun-woo’s guerrilla fan meeting ended just like that.

* * *
I knew it.
Ryu Gun-woo and I had quite different appearances, and even if there was some overlap, there were differences in our looks.
It wasn’t just appearance either. Our public images differed as well.
‘The demand has to be different.’
In other words, just because someone liked me didn’t mean they had to like Ryu Gun-woo.
[Hyung….]
It’s fine.
The guerrilla concert had just ended, and there was a gap of a few hours for filming preparation before the performance content started.
So… since that time had opened up, I was just organizing my thoughts.
And facing reality too.
‘I’m not being stupid about this.’
This wasn’t reality, so why had I naturally believed everything would flow the same way?
And even if it were reality, whether individuals continued to support an idol or not was their own choice, wasn’t it?
There was nothing more to think about.
…As an idol, Ryu Gun-woo is not me. Don’t forget that.
[I think you’re cool no matter what form you take, hyung! Really!]
This guy was so altruistic and selfless that it was almost painful to watch.
Even knowing we were the same person, someone could still prefer one side. It wasn’t a real relationship anyway—in a position of one-sided support, wasn’t that natural?
[That’s not necessarily true! There’s definitely that idol-like feeling that only you have, and even if your appearance changes, the….]
“….”
I was reading the popup carefully writing out words of comfort when a sudden thought struck me.
No matter how altruistic this guy was, wasn’t this… a bit much?
Especially considering his position.
‘You… you don’t even hate that I’m sitting in a body you’d already passed your civil service exam for.’
[….]
Even if you didn’t hate me, shouldn’t you at least feel some resistance to this situation?
You’re floating without a body while I’m using both of mine.
The popup trembled.
[But… I really don’t mind at all.]
I watched the popup appear letter by letter in silence, feeling something strange and out of place.
This wasn’t him trying to comfort me—it was genuine sincerity.
And he felt the strangeness of it too.
[Is this weird? I’m not sure. Maybe because I’m not a person anymore….]
‘You’re a person.’
I cut him off immediately.
‘Anyone who worries about others like that is definitely a person.’
No, we’re… we’re not men, so… *sobs* anyway, thank you so much…
The popup seemed relieved and returned to its usual tone, but my mind—though I didn’t show it—had become even more complicated.
‘Can this situation really be summarized as… a worsening phenomenon of losing humanity?’
Perhaps in this situation, I’m the only one he can talk to, and since he barely discusses anything about himself even with me, it might have accelerated the problem further.
‘…I need to have a proper conversation with him.’
But damn it, my head is too muddled right now to know where to even start.
‘How pathetic.’
I sat quietly in the corridor where there were no cameras, lowered my head, and closed my eyes. I decided to stay like this until my mind could fully comprehend the current situation.
How much time had passed like that?
“Um… are you alright?”
A low voice reached me. Not a contestant—a staff member, perhaps.
They probably spoke to me because they were concerned about someone spacing out in the corridor.
“…Yes.”
I nodded slightly, meaning I’d pull myself together and go back inside on my own.
Surely they wouldn’t bring a camera just because I looked unwell… no, knowing the Broadcasting Station people, they absolutely would.
And sure enough, I heard light footsteps running down the corridor, then returning shortly after.
Did they bring a camera?
“Here.”
But what was thrust in front of my face was… warm steam.
Vapor rising from a hot drink.
I opened my eyes.
“When I’m not feeling well or lack energy, drinking something warm always makes me feel better.”
A hand holding a white paper cup appeared from somewhere.
Inside the steaming paper cup, a dark beverage was visible.
“Of course, it varies from person to person… but warmth is the same for everyone. Please try some.”
I accepted it and took a sip.
…It was hot chocolate.
I lifted my head.
“How is it?”
Black hair.
“Even people who don’t usually like sweet things say it’s fine at times like this. …Would you like to have some more?”
Sun Ah-hyun, in his mid-twenties, was standing there.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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