Debut or Die - Chapter 259

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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A Fatal Illness if I Don’t Debut – Episode 259
The evening practice wrapped up quickly as planned. After returning to the Dormitory, I replayed my conversation with Big Sae-jin while showering.
Wasn’t that what he was really saying?
‘Sun Ah-hyun’s pride would be hurt…’
He didn’t want to show his embarrassing side being bullied by someone close to his age.
“Hmm.”
I won’t deny it. It’s a perspective I hadn’t considered.
Maybe because he’d been trailing after me since we first met at Idol Corporation, he didn’t really feel like someone my age.
‘Honestly, being the same age is just on the surface.’
If I had any conscience, I couldn’t really call myself the same age as him—I mean, I’m not sure about my corporate life, but I definitely have clear memories up to age twenty-nine.
Even if we were the same age, it was ambiguous.
‘I’m not even sure if Sun Ah-hyun is the type to worry about such things.’
With other guys it might be different, but Sun Ah-hyun seemed like such a genuinely kind person that he’d probably just accept it gratefully.
But I’ll admit one thing.
‘I can’t keep solving everything for him.’
No matter how much it’s for smooth activities, I’ve been giving him a lot of instructions whenever problems arise.
Maybe it’s time for Sun Ah-hyun to try handling things himself.
“He’s got the grit, at least.”
I shrugged my shoulders.
Except for that brief moment at the awards ceremony, he didn’t seem particularly down, so let’s leave it be.
I’ll just keep an eye out to make sure he’s not overextending himself.
Click.
I finished showering and headed to the Refrigerator. Since I was cutting weight, milk at this hour was out of the question—I was thinking of having some ice water instead.
Sun Ah-hyun wasn’t in his Room.
‘He must be in the Living Room.’
And before I rounded the corner of the Corridor, I heard voices.
“S-so like… if it seems like you’re praising someone you don’t really like, what do you… think about that?”
“You’re praising someone you don’t like?”
“Y-yeah. Something like that.”
It was a conversation between Cha Yu-jin and Sun Ah-hyun.
Cha Yu-jin’s unhesitating response followed.
“Why would you praise someone you don’t like?”
“I… I don’t know. Maybe because you can’t get angry?”
“OK, OK.”
He answered cheerfully.
“Then I’ll say ‘I know~’! I know I’m good too!”
“Y-you do…?”
“Yes. I like praise!”
It was a brilliant psychological victory—he’d absorb any praise as praise, regardless of the other person’s intentions.
Though I doubted Sun Ah-hyun could use that approach so comfortably.
‘Why would I give advice to Cha Yu-jin of all people….’
It was an odd thought.
I considered waiting for their conversation to end, but then realized how ridiculous that would be, so I just walked out.
The moment our eyes met, Sun Ah-hyun jumped to his feet.
“P-Park Moon-dae. Want some water?”
“Yeah.”
“Here…!”
A glass of water materialized instantly.
“…Thanks.”
‘Does he get his pride hurt when I help him?’
I couldn’t shake the feeling that this was still very much like voluntary subordination… but anyway, I drank it gratefully.
I sipped the water and waited for him to resume his conversation with Cha Yu-jin.
But the conversation didn’t continue. Sun Ah-hyun just flustered and asked me back.
“Why, why…?”
Ah. Had I been staring at them too much?
“Oh, no. Just wondering if tomorrow’s practice was at seven.”
“Ah, yeah. Seven’s right…!”
“Got it, thanks.”
I finished speaking with a hollow tone.
Nothing particularly suspicious. Though he did seem a bit more energized….
“Good~”
Just then, Big Sae-jin walked out from the Living Room, grinning widely as he patted my back and passed by.
…For some reason, I had the feeling that bastard was messing with me.
‘Whatever, damn it.’
They can all do what they want.
There was still a mountain of work before the comeback. Let me just focus on my own tasks.
“Seven’s so early….”
“Just get some sleep.”
I went to my Room, ran through monitoring and stage composition checks one more time, then collapsed onto my Bed.
Sun Ah-hyun came in quite late and went to sleep. His effort to be quiet was admirable.
‘He’s practically crawling.’
I almost told him to just sleep, but figured he’d be startled, so I left it alone.
And the next day.
After morning practice ended, around lunchtime, Sun Ah-hyun left alone for his usual collaboration practice.
Apparently, the schedule was packed with work in short bursts every two or three days going forward.
“You sure you’re okay? Wouldn’t it be better to eat first?”
“N-No, I can eat when I get back…! It’ll be quick.”
“Well, if you say so.”
“Just a moment.”
I tossed Sun Ah-hyun a glucose candy. Since I’d agreed with the trainer to keep some on hand for emergencies, it should be fine to spare one.
“Th-thank you….”
“Have a good time.”
“Ah-hyun, fighting~”
“I hope you have a productive practice session!”
Sun Ah-hyun hastily grabbed the candies, bowed his head, and left the room.
“….”
He’s not going to be sniffling the whole way there, is he?
“Hyung! Can I have some candy too!”
“Here.”
“Yes!”
I distributed the remaining candies and crossed my arms.
‘I do have a good eye for these things….’
That’s when Big Sae-jin suddenly started fanning himself unnecessarily.
“Ah~ we’re getting hot from practice, so should we grab some ice cream? There’s a place downstairs that sells healthy options!”
“Sounds good!!”
“Oh, that place. Yeah, that should be fine since it’s light.”
“Okay~ then let me do one more round and I’ll grab some with Moon-dae!”
“…?”
Why am I being dragged into this?
Suspicious of his motives, I followed him out anyway.
The moment Big Sae-jin stepped outside, he burst into laughter.
“Hey, Park Moon-dae! Does it really bother you that much?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You know Ah-hyun’s been monitoring our schedule every single time, right? It’d be more natural if you just talked to him!”
“….”
No, I’m just checking how he looks before and after the collaboration practice, you bastard.
But Big Sae-jin continued laughing and snickering.
“Ah~ Moon-dae, Moon-dae, what do we do with you, really? You need to know everything in the world and control it all to be satisfied?”
“Be quiet.”
“That amazing ability should only be used for the album, capable Mr. Moon-dae~”
“….”
“Right, if you could use it to pick ice cream too… hehehehe!”
“Where are you going?”
I sprinted to catch the fleeing bastard, and the rest of them received mysterious ice cream bullets delivered at high speed.
Then I sat on the Training Room floor and thought briefly.
Had I really developed such a taste for control?
‘No, I’m just trying to survive.’
Since my own survival was at stake, I naturally became concerned about potential problems within the group. It was a kind of biological instinct.
‘And it’s not even that anymore.’
Even if my status window disappeared, it wouldn’t kill me, so the target was ultimately just a high-risk objective.
‘I don’t waste time on unnecessary things.’
I sucked on an ice cream and focused on the afternoon practice instead.
But even that concentration was soon disrupted.
Sun Ah-hyun had returned with worry etched all over his face.
“I’m… I’m back.”
“….”
Looks like things didn’t go well.

* * *
Sun Ah-hyun quickly recovered his composure and joined practice, but now the others were beginning to sense the strange atmosphere too.
“Did something happen while you were preparing for the collaboration?”
“I suppose the preparations are more complicated than expected.”
However, Sun Ah-hyun showed no signs of being under particular strain. It wasn’t anything serious.
As a result, Sun Ah-hyun was quickly handed an ice cream and the topic faded away.
Usually, the right approach was to ask about something like this during a break, timing it carefully.
And normally that would be the roommate’s or leader’s responsibility… and I happened to be the roommate.
‘I suppose I should ask out of courtesy.’
But there was nothing particularly pressing I needed to bring up.
After practice ended, I was sitting in my room reviewing the dance practice video I’d filmed earlier.
That’s when Sun Ah-hyun spoke to me first.
“Um… M-Moon-dae? Can I ask you just one thing?”
“Sure. What is it?”
Could it be?
And my suspicion was right.
“W-well… if the people you work with temporarily are… um, difficult to deal with… h-how do you usually handle it?”
“….”
A direct request for advice.
“It depends on the situation. What do you mean by difficult to deal with—are they superiors?”
“Oh, no, it’s not that. It’s more like… they’re uncomfortable, and they deliberately show insincerity.”
Just as I’d expected.
“Well, in that case, you can either mock them back or ignore them within the bounds of courtesy. They’ll bow and come crawling back once you succeed more.”
“I… I see.”
And in that moment, I realized something.
‘Damn, that feels satisfying.’
It seems I’m the type who feels at ease only when I know and control everything. How irritating.
I felt bewildered at having conceded one point to Big Sae-jin, and I continued listening carefully to Sun Ah-hyun’s words to understand the situation better.
But Sun Ah-hyun seemed… somewhat embarrassed.
No, very much so.
“I’m… I’m sorry. I’m the only one not doing well… I k-keep receiving help.”
“…?”
“O-other members are all doing fine… but m-me, I think there’s something wrong with me. I’ve been to counseling, I practice, but it’s not working….”
Why was the conversation heading in that direction?
“There’s nothing wrong with you. Why are you saying that?”
“B-because, every time I meet people my age… it’s been like this from the start….”
“….”
Sun Ah-hyun seemed so flustered that he’d forgotten he was asking for advice on someone else’s problem.
“Since when?”
“Middle school… when I was doing ballet….”
Sun Ah-hyun hesitated before speaking quietly. His voice trembled.
“I hurt my ankle… and everyone was so happy about it….”
Chills ran down my spine.
“Th-they weren’t bad kids or anything, but… ever since then, I think being in a group with people my age just… felt wrong….”
“….”
I sat up.
“Listen, I’ve never seen anyone in this group who seemed to dislike being around you.”
“B-but they’re all good people….”
“You have the best character in this group. And you went to an arts middle school, didn’t you?”
“Huh? Y-yes.”
“You were top of your class.”
“W-well, m-maybe a few times….”
When Sun Ah-hyun said it like that, it meant he’d done it consistently.
I crossed my arms.
His seemingly refined parents and the professional counselor wouldn’t have approached it this way, so I’d just have to do it myself.
“Listen. Everything you’ve gone through so far was done by kids whose eyes went crazy with envy.”
“Wh-what?”
“A handsome guy who dances so damn well—that’s why they were pissed off and did it. Got it?”
“B-but… oh, okay.”
Sun Ah-hyun seemed to nod just to yield to the pressure. Good.
“So every day, look in the mirror and chant ‘I’m really amazing’ ten times, and don’t pay attention to those kids whose eyes went crazy with jealousy. Understand?”
“Th-that’s something I only did at the beginning of counseling….”
“Do it again.”
Sun Ah-hyun’s face clearly showed embarrassment, but for a different reason than before. Still, he eventually nodded with difficulty.
And then I suddenly caught onto something in what he’d said.
“Wait, so your major change….”
Was switching from ballet to contemporary dance because of the bullying?
But Sun Ah-hyun quickly shook his head.
“N-no…! B-ballet is… they said my body type was wasted on it.”
“Body type?”
“Y-yes, ballet requires, well… you need rounded feet. I don’t have that, and my pelvis is small too. So they recommended I try a path where I could do better.”
I got the gist of it.
Sun Ah-hyun had talent for dance, but his physique made it more advantageous to pursue something other than ballet to reach the absolute pinnacle. That must be it.
So before serious university entrance exam preparation, they switched him over quickly… that seems to be what happened.
In the end, after going in circles, he ended up in the idol industry rather than pure dance, but since he’s doing well and making good money, all’s well that ends well.
“And he’s putting his contemporary dance training to good use right now, so it works out.”
“Y-yeah…?”
Sun Ah-hyun smiled faintly. But soon his expression darkened and he lowered his head.
“A-actually, today… the topic of contemporary dance came up.”
“During the collaboration practice?”
“Yeah.”
Sun Ah-hyun nodded. And he spoke with a voice tinged with slight grievance.
“Th-they said when I do those difficult moves, none of us will stand out and only Ah-hyun will shine. They said they’re envious and congratulate me….”
They really had a talent for twisting their words in that capitalist way of theirs.
“…So you couldn’t respond?”
“Oh, no. I did respond….”
Sun Ah-hyun’s face flushed red.
“I-I’m not really sure. I just… said ‘Thank you for saying that, I’ll do my best’….”
….
“Eugene said it’s okay to just accept compliments as compliments… w-was that okay? Everyone else didn’t respond….”
I barely managed to answer.
“Yeah. You did well.”
Sun Ah-hyun might actually turn out to be the type who fits in well without any malice.
Big Sae-jin’s words about not needing to worry proved right once again.
…Though that earlier conversation was worth having at least once.
“Keep doing it that way. You did well.”
“Y-yeah.”
Sun Ah-hyun’s face brightened instantly.
And I honestly admitted defeat.
‘…I should just focus on preparing the album.’
And two weeks later, December 31st.
The MBS music program that would mark the last day of the year was drawing near.
And the stage where Testa members would make their first appearance was the collaboration stage that Sun Ah-hyun was participating in.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com

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