Debut or Die - Chapter 234

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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A Fatal Illness if I Don’t Debut – Episode 234
Bae Sae-jin stared at his smartphone with hollow eyes.
Most articles deliberately stoking anxiety had been taken down by the Company.
Well, at least that’s what the Company claimed, but Bae Sae-jin’s assessment differed.
‘It’s not that… it’s just already circulated enough that there’s nothing left to milk from it, right?’
Since the Company had completely blocked the truth about the accident from the media, there was nothing more to exploit, so the articles had withered away.
That’s right. The Company was desperately suppressing any mention of the Former Manager in the press.
In the end, the articles simply reported it as ‘an accident caused by the negligent driving of a Former Manager whose tenure was nearly finished.’
‘This is absurd.’
Bae Sae-jin clenched his fists.
After some members gritted their teeth and relentlessly interrogated the staff, they too learned how the Former Manager had gained entry.
-The performance company didn’t properly hear about the Manager change… they thought he was out on other business during the day, so they let him through.
-…!!
So this accident was also partly the Company’s fault for failing to properly notify relevant parties that the Former Manager had been terminated!
Since they knew this themselves, Bae Sae-jin instinctively understood they were desperately suppressing media coverage all the way up to headquarters.
Even now, the Company was facing criticism from all sides for staff negligence.
But if the facts became clearer, they’d suffer catastrophic damage, so they were buying time until the incident died down as much as possible.
‘Instead of wasting time like this… they should focus on Park Moon-dae’s recovery.’
Of course, I held no expectations.
If some members hadn’t strongly resisted the Company, they would’ve already started mentioning a six-member format.
‘It’s disgusting…’
Bae Sae-jin covered his mouth.
Though he understood it was unavoidable, he was completely fed up with the Company’s vulgar capitalist perspective that viewed the group as nothing but a business asset.
How they acted with reckless indifference toward the schedules of their contracted entertainers, as if it weren’t their concern.
He’d witnessed it too many times since childhood—it was nauseating.
‘This kind of accident happens in this industry every other day…!’
Why did the same thing keep repeating?
At this rate, stripping away the pretty justification of being within the system… there was no difference from the previous Agency.
Bae Sae-jin pressed his hand against his mouth so hard it turned pale.
‘…I need to find a more proper Agency.’
There had to be Agencies run by decent people who upheld basic human decency.
There had to be.
‘If I can just endure three more years…’
Bae Sae-jin was on the verge of sinking into an endless stream of consciousness. But he managed to pull himself out.
Because he thought of Park Moon-dae.
…Who still hadn’t regained consciousness.
….
Bae Sae-jin let his hand holding the smartphone drop limply.
No matter what plans he made, he knew that Park Moon-dae had to be there for things to work properly.
‘It’s like… he’s handled everything his whole life.’
Bae Sae-jin had never encountered a peer with such superhuman qualities.
That radiant talent, confidence, and boldness alone made him seem like an entertainer blessed by heaven itself—and yet he was even skilled at navigating social dynamics.
During the Audition Program days, I’d felt relative deprivation at times, but after debuting, there was no room for such feelings.
I simply couldn’t bring myself to compare.
‘I’ve received so much help from him, after all.’
I’d boasted that I’d repay him without fail, yet the gap felt insurmountable.
‘I wondered if there would ever come a time when Park Moon-dae needed my help.’
In truth, the efforts I’d made to assist him had always been clumsy and half-hearted, or so I’d coldly assessed myself.
But this time, I truly had to move. I had to accomplish something.
Park Moon-dae remained unconscious, and the other members were either injured or mentally exhausted, unable to perform at their usual level.
‘But… I’ve always been this way.’
I’d always lived in a state of physical and mental strain, perpetually on edge.
So in a situation like this, I needed to move more proactively…
It had to be me, Bae Sae-jin.
“….”
I removed my hand from my mouth. My eyes were gleaming with determination.
‘Let’s do this.’
I picked up my smartphone and checked a contact.
Then, after taking a deep breath, I began composing an email.
“….”
My hands trembled.
‘But there’s no one else who can do this!’
I clenched my teeth and pressed send.
I didn’t know if this would be an effective choice. But in my judgment, it was the right one.
“…Phew.”
I sat back down.
Fidgeting with the hamster-patterned phone case a fan had gifted me, I tried to compose myself.
That was when it happened.
[♬♪♩~ ♬♬♪♪]
“…!”
A call came through.
I frantically checked my smartphone screen.
-Sun Ah-hyun’s Younger Brother
I answered without hesitation, barely breathing.
“Yes, what’s the matter….”
Multiple excited voices rang out from the other end of the line.
“….”
As I waited calmly, I was finally struck dumb by what I heard.
“…! Wait, wait, hold on! Just a moment…!”
I stammered, unable to finish my sentence, and bolted from the Conference Room.
My heart raced.

* * *
After activating Nectar (S).
My vision suddenly turned white, and before I knew it, I was drifting through an empty, blank expanse devoid of all sensation.
No, it wasn’t drifting so much as being pulled into something.
‘Is this the opposite of entering a dream?’
Back then, everything had turned pitch black.
If I had to think about it comfortably, I’d guess I was waking up.
I tried to cross my arms, only to realize I couldn’t feel my body’s form at all. And it had been that way for quite some time.
‘How much longer do I have to wait?’
In that moment.
Color flooded into the pure white space.
‘…!’
No, it wasn’t color so much as waves.
From far away.
Strange, abstract sensations—as if emotions and thoughts themselves had been given form—approached and washed over me.
Whirrrrr—.
‘…!!’
An intense experience rippled through my entire being.
And.
The first person I perceived was Park Moon-dae’s Fan, staring at her smartphone.
She had been taking Park Moon-dae’s photos since the days before his debut on the Audition Program.
From the moment she heard about Park Moon-dae’s traffic accident, she had been in an almost delirious state, clutching her smartphone without pause.
She couldn’t even cry.
And at 3 AM.
After confirming the article about Park Moon-dae’s surgery on her phone, she was posting on her SNS.
-Please pray for him. I’m begging you
Her trembling fingernail struck the screen.
What is this?
Next appeared a brother and sister.
The older sister, whose eyes were already swollen and bloodshot, was fiercely arguing online with people discussing Testa’s traffic accident.
Instead of picking fights or joking as usual, the younger brother sat beside her and backed her up.
He casually threw out some dubious internet medical knowledge, slipping in the reassurance that Park Moon-dae’s chances of being fine were much higher….
The wave was warm.
The Graduate Student, who had seen the breaking news, spilled her coffee while pulling it from the machine in one corner of the Lab Room.
Without caring that the floor was a mess, she wept openly.
Lab Room colleagues who rushed over were flustered, but soon understood the situation and worried alongside her.
Some had privately thought it pathetic, but even they offered comfort without hesitation—the sadness was too intense for gossip now.
The story didn’t end.
A coworker and fan of both Lee Sae-jin and Park Moon-dae clicked their tongue at the entertainment industry’s conventions, remarking that Testa still hadn’t learned their lesson upon hearing news of the traffic accident.
Yet unable to hide their anxiety, they took the next day off from work under the pretense of poor health, searching for news about Park Moon-dae….
Why did all of this keep pouring down on me? I couldn’t understand.
A person who had come to their first idol concert in their life.
A person who, after following various idols, had come to take interest in Park Moon-dae—someone who had loved “May’s Groom.”
A person who had supported Park Moon-dae on the Audition Program before moving on and forgetting for a time. A person who had liked other members of Testa before coming to have favorable feelings toward Park Moon-dae as well.
A person who didn’t particularly love Park Moon-dae but worried nonetheless. A person who had bulk-purchased albums and collected every one of Park Moon-dae’s photocards, arranging them carefully….
Ping—
The experiences and thoughts of all manner of people who knew of Park Moon-dae of Testa sparkled like stars scattered across a summer night’s rural sky.
Countless worries, sorrows, and thoughts—all those intricate hearts and simple, intense emotions—filled my chest to bursting.
And held it gently.
‘….’
I couldn’t fathom how I could feel such an intense sense of solidarity with people I’d never even met in person.
I found myself thinking without hesitation.
‘Am I Park Moon-dae?’
No, that question wasn’t quite right.
‘Am I the idol Park Moon-dae of Testa?’
How many entertainers worked under assumed names, changing their birth names and the identities and appearances they’d lived with?
Yet would such an entertainer, watching themselves on television, think of themselves as someone else?
Was Park Moon-dae merely a character I’d created, like “May’s Groom”?
‘…No.’
That wasn’t it.
Park Moon-dae wasn’t me entirely, not my whole self.
But he was certainly part of me.
All these emotions and thoughts… even if they weren’t directed entirely toward me, there was undoubtedly a part of them I shared.
So this definition was correct.
These people… they were that.
-People who hoped I would wake up.
‘….’
I felt overwhelmed.
All those emotions and thoughts crashed over my head like waves, leaving wet traces as they passed.
The pure white space had become stained with every color imaginable, colors dripping away.
It tasted salty, like tears.
It was sublime.
A sweet, living taste.
I was drawn upward into that kaleidoscope of color.
From above, light seemed to be seeping through.
[Nectar (S)]
-Activation successful!

* * *
“Gasp!”
I exhaled as though expelling something trapped deep within.
My limbs felt sluggish, as though I’d been pulled from mud.
Yet the air tasted bittersweet against my tongue.
‘…Is it daytime?’
My vision remained blurred, likely from keeping my eyes shut for so long.
But my ears seemed to work just fine.
“Park Moon-dae!!”
“Moon, Moon-dae…!!”
I recognized those voices well enough.
These fools should be getting their own treatment, yet here they were crowding into my hospital room.
‘…Still, I’m grateful.’
I endured the onslaught of hands cascading over my shoulders and head, my ears ringing from their shouts.
I was genuinely glad.
It was only after my vision cleared and the medical staff removed the devices attached to my body that I took stock of the situation.
Remarkably, all six of them were in the hospital room.
‘A private room really does have its advantages.’
It was almost absurd that seven grown men could fit inside with space to spare.
And the reason for this situation was… apparently some of them who’d come to visit had witnessed something.
“Moon, Moon-dae seemed to, just for a moment, open his eyes… so, just in case, we called out. And, we contacted the medical staff too….”
“Yeah…. Thanks.”
“No, it’s nothing…!”
The thought crossed my mind—what would they have done if I hadn’t woken up?—but I didn’t voice it.
‘I have some sense, after all.’
There was no way I could dampen the emotional fervor of tears, snot, and celebration.
…And besides, after so long, it felt good to see them.
Instead, I expressed my gratitude to the members as warmly as I could manage.
The one with the reddened nose suddenly cried out.
“Moon-dae, Moon-dae, want some melon?? The sweetness is incredible~”
“Yeah, sure.”
His instincts were sharp as ever. I took a fresh look at Big Sae-jin.
“…Wait, is Moon-dae actually marveling at having such a genuinely sincere friend~?”
“Something like that.”
“…!”
Hearing that nonsense, reality finally sank in.
The feeling of returning to the world.
Big Sae-jin stared at me with a bewildered expression, then dramatically raised one arm to cover his face and made sobbing sounds.
“That’s so touching!”
He seemed to be genuinely crying while simultaneously pretending to cry—which suggested my condition must have been truly dire.
‘Looking back at the scenes I witnessed earlier, surgery is definitely happening….’
I’d expected some clichéd moment where the medical staff would speak of miracles, but nothing like that had materialized.
In truth, my physical condition wasn’t nearly as dire as I’d feared. So I wondered if perhaps activating ‘Nectar’ was responsible for my relatively intact state.
‘…Could it be that I would have recovered even if I’d just stayed still?’
Maybe I’d simply overreacted.
But regardless, I was back, and that was enough for me.
I was satisfied with myself right now.
I worked through the situation in my head while eating the melon I’d received first as a patient’s special meal.
Perhaps because I’d only recently regained consciousness, my thinking felt a bit sluggish.
Then I noticed him—Cha Yu-jin, practically drooling at the sight of my melon.
“…Want some?”
“It’s okay! You need to eat a lot and stay strong, hyung!”
Spirited as ever. He’d practically strangled me with his welcome when I first woke up, and apparently that hadn’t changed.
And Kim Rae-bin looked like he had plenty to say, but he seemed too busy crying, so I left him alone.
What I needed to discuss now….
“By the way, what day is it now? What happened to the Former Manager who caused the accident?”
“…!”
This was the person who could answer that.
“…Park Moon-dae.”
“Yes.”
Unexpectedly, Bae Sae-jin spoke up with a stern expression.
“First… listen to this story before anything else.”
“Okay.”
Bae Sae-jin took a deep breath and began explaining slowly.
“The Company… well, they were trying not to properly address the Former Manager situation.”
“I see.”
I’d anticipated that much.
‘That’s something I can use later.’
What mattered was whether that bastard who’d been behind the wheel was now ready to eat prison food.
But Bae Sae-jin, his fist clenched, said something I never could have imagined.
“So I made an anonymous report to the Human Rights Commission…!”
“…??”
“About everything that’s happened so far!”
“…?!”
What… what did he just say?

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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