Black Killer Whale Baby - Chapter 244

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 244
Levai continued speaking naturally, as if he hadn’t witnessed anything.
“The Snake Clan Head has asked to see you. How would you like to proceed?”
Ekion’s large hand grasped me, but it soon slipped away gently.
“…Sorry for holding you back. Go ahead.”
The skin where he touched me was still warm, as if his fever hadn’t subsided, and his expression was hazy.
“…What’s this about?”
I patted Ekion’s hand reassuringly and turned my gaze away.
“He didn’t explain the details, but it seems to be related to what happened in the jungle.”
That made sense. I laid Ekion back down and rose to my feet.
“Let’s go.”
As I carefully closed the door and began walking, I felt a sharp gaze boring into my temples.
“Levai.”
Rather than turn around, I spoke quietly.
“If you have something to say, say it.”
“…”
“You’re not one to hold back, are you? Our strategist.”
For a moment, only footsteps echoed. I heard a faint sigh.
“Do you love her?”
The corridor was empty.
The Snake Clan Head had graciously cleared the entire building for us, considering we had come from far away.
Therefore, the quiet corridor amplified every sound more than usual.
“…”
Levai, who had posed the question, fell silent. Both his expression and voice.
But I had known him long enough to understand. His calm eyes were facing a tempest far fiercer than any before.
It showed through, no matter how hard he tried to hide it.
“Have you finally come to understand love?”
“That’s a strange way to put it.”
“…”
“Even if the categories differ, isn’t it love that you respect and follow me, and that I cherish you and care for the others?”
“…”
“And what of the love I feel for Father in this life, and toward my brothers?”
“Matriarch, I don’t wish to play with words.”
“I see. You don’t seem to be in the mood for that.”
Our footsteps continued at a steady pace.
“Do I love her? Well, I’m drawn to her.”
“Are you certain of that?”
“What are you trying to say?”
“Whether you can be certain that what you feel is truly love.”
I turned my gaze away.
Levai spoke with his gaze fixed firmly ahead.
“If I had revealed from the beginning that I retained my memories, do you think the situation would have been different?”
I didn’t answer. I couldn’t answer.
“Not just me, but Aneli, Kamula, Hauser, Rolli, Kehara… and all my other subordinates not mentioned here—if they all returned exactly as they were in their past lives.”
He concluded his words calmly, maintaining an even breath from beginning to end.
“Would your decision change then?”
I faltered at those longed-for names, but I couldn’t stop walking.
Only Hauser’s words brushed past my mind.
“If you miss them. And if I could restore those days to the Matriarch, would you accept?”
Levai’s sudden words were surely connected to what Hauser had said.
“You make it sound as though you have some method.”
“I don’t know.”
“Don’t jest. Is there something even you don’t know?”
“Yes. For instance, the Matriarch’s heart. I never understood it, and I spent my life regretting that.”
“….”
“I don’t know, but that man Hauser seems to. He knows the method to awaken memories from the past life.”
I stiffened. For the first time, my steps halted.
“When I first realized what regression was, I thought it was an opportunity to correct everything I had done wrong and all my regrets.”
Levai said that since our beginning was always regret, this time he wanted to meet me more ordinarily and experience an ordinary life together.
“In truth, all my subordinates felt the same. They wanted to see you living an ordinary life.”
Levai slowly brought his hand to his face.
“Isn’t that so? In your past life, you shed so much blood to protect us. Your blood, to protect us who were so much weaker than you.”
No, that’s not true. I tried to speak, but my voice wouldn’t come.
“I appeared before you far too intact. That was my failing.”
“….”
“To you, a pitiful and tragic existence, I showed myself without knowing such weakness.”
Finally, my steps stopped. When I turned my head, I saw Levai’s face crumbling for the first time.
You never broke like this, not even when confessing to me.
“Did you pity the Dragon Duke? Did his wretched circumstances move you?”
I couldn’t deny it. Whether you called it superiority or compassion, it was the same.
Because my feelings toward Ekion had begun with something close to pity.
“I regret not appearing before you more desperately.”
“Levai.”
“Why do you end things arbitrarily? You move forward. But Hauser and I remain trapped there still.”
“….”
“We who died peacefully, believing you would live!”
“….”
“I regret it. If I had known you would die too, I wouldn’t have gone first. I wasn’t ignorant of what it meant to you that we died first, and yet…!”
Tears streamed down beneath his glasses.
“I wished for your survival, I prayed for it. So why did we meet again in the next life?”
“….”
I took a deep breath.
“If we met ordinarily and I remained silent, waiting for you to recognize me—that was my mistake. But if there is now a way for us to reunite as we truly were, shouldn’t you choose us?”
It was like the stubbornness of a child. Yet I could not appeal to reason and logic before him.
“…When I was helplessly trapped by the Crown Prince’s attack in the jungle.”
At this sudden shift in topic, Levai closed his mouth.
Resentment flickered in his dark eyes beneath his glasses, but it was only for an instant.
You were always someone who listened to me intently and gave me your full attention.
“The Dragon Duke—I learned that Ekion had recovered his memories. And why he lost them.”
“Did that settle your heart?”
“Hear me out. You know I’ve been single my whole life, right? Never even dated. Obviously, I’ve never had my first kiss either.”
“…? What are you suddenly talking about…?”
“It just so happened that I almost had my first kiss there.”
Levai’s lips pressed firmly shut. Shock and turmoil flickered across his neat, sharp features—impossible to conceal.
“But I didn’t.”
“….”
“It was incomplete.”
I recalled that moment—my first kiss, yes, my first kiss.
When our faces drew close.
“Stop.”
I stopped myself once more.
“You both came to mind. Hauser’s heart, your heart. And I haven’t given you a proper answer yet.”
“….”
“I thought it wasn’t right.”
“So you mean to settle things properly before you enjoy it?”
“You certainly have a way with words.”
Levai flinched and fell silent for a moment. Watching him, I smiled bitterly.
“Yeah, I’ll admit it.”
When Hauser appeared, when Levai confessed he had his memories—I was confused.
More than once, I felt the illusion of having returned to the third cycle.
What I tried to forget but couldn’t. I miss all of you who died to save me.
It weighs on my heart.
Because it remains as regret.
“The me from my previous life.”
The me from the third cycle.
“Might have loved you.”
No matter how much I enjoyed mischievous teasing, I knew when to stop.
The words I let slip only before Levai must have reflected a sincerity even I hadn’t known I possessed.
It was a conclusion I had reached after reflecting on my long existence in the gaps of time.
“I’m sorry. For always teasing you with jokes like that.”
“….”
“Because I never once told you that I meant it sincerely.”
How could I not have loved you? You were a strategist who understood me better than I understood myself.Whenever someone died or was wounded during the war, I couldn’t even shed tears—I would shut myself away in my quarters.
During the war, whenever someone died or was injured, I couldn’t even shed tears and just locked myself away in the barracks.
And you would quietly finish what needed to be done in my stead, then stand before my quarters all through the night.
“Levai.”
“….”
“I wanted to end this tedious life.”
I wanted to return to Korea.
If I became the Matriarch again here and met you all once more, that ending would be your deaths.
I was sick of that cycle. I was in pain from it.
“So as a means to an end, I chose Pierre Aquasiadel, who abandoned me in every life. Yes, as I said, it was nothing but a means.”
When I closed my eyes, this life slipped away like sand through my fingers.
Rayla, Lugaru, Misa, the Herring Sisters….
People I never experienced up close, events that never happened before.
I beat down Third Brother, achieved excellent results at the educational institution, earned the Matriarch’s recognition at meetings.
And.
“I never knew I could love Father enough to break my own will.”
“….”
“That I could forgive.”
I wondered. What if I brought those people from the third cycle before my eyes again?
This time, could I make their lives happy so they wouldn’t regret dying because of me in the third cycle?
It would be good. So very happy.
But that is merely a dream.
“I am no longer the same person I was in my past life when I would face you.”
Meeting Lugaru, I learned the joy of playing with young friends.
Through Rayla, I felt the thrill of recognition. Through Misa and the Herring Maids, I felt what maternal love truly was.
I could not become the me from the third cycle, filled only with bitterness.
“I’m sorry.”
An apology heavier than any before spilled out.
“For making you die. I was an incompetent Matriarch.”
Now was the time to accept it.
“I’m sorry.”
I let go of my wavering heart, acknowledging that our time had passed.
“For not loving you.”

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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