Black-Haired Dad Isn’t Something You Reap - Chapter 6

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 06. Return (6)
Not long after Prisoner fled the Prison, an order came down for me to return to my chambers.
Since they summoned me without a word about reflection or anything else, it seemed one of the blockhead’s lackeys had rammed the imperial decree through while the blockhead was intoxicated.
Personally, it worked out well, but from a national perspective, it was something that should never happen.
I really need to depose that Emperor soon.
Mulling over this, I sprawled across my bed and unfurled a mail-order catalog that the Emperor’s Concubines frequently perused, chewing on squid legs while flipping through the pages.
All it contained were jewels, necklaces, and other trivial nonsense.
I wondered if there was anything fun to play with, anything entertaining. As I flipped through the pages with this thought, an item caught my eye that I couldn’t look away from.
A brilliant orange that practically glowed, an enchanting snout and the alluring curve of its plump rear, even surprisingly impressive auxiliary features!
“A duck-squeaking shoe! It really is a duck-squeaking shoe!”
This was something I’d wanted as a child but never got to wear due to propriety.
And if I order right now, it’s only 39,900 Lakmas? Less than 40,000 Lakmas! I absolutely have to buy this!
“Emily! Emily! Where are you, Emily!”
“Yes, Your Majesty. I am Emily today!”
Good, Emily. Go buy this for me right now, this one.
As I pressed my finger on the product in the catalog, Emily immediately declared she would fetch it from the merchant who had just entered the palace and dashed out.
And the moment Emily left, the most bothersome woman in the world entered.
“Piiiiishaaaaa!”
Ugh, it’s been a while since I heard that Pisha voice. Usually she’s off at war—what brings her home today?
This woman, the proud family head of Lorowi and my mother’s one and only sibling, was a loud person who spouted nothing but propriety whenever she opened her mouth.
She had greatly contributed to my childhood inability to ride the elephant slide, wear duck-squeaking shoes, attend social gatherings with my peers, or even respond to love letters that flew over the fence before I tore them all to shreds.
That wasn’t all. She endlessly nagged about what her sister had done at my age, and forcibly taught me embroidery and knitting, hobbies that had been her sister’s in life.
Whenever I tried to do anything, she’d say I was just a child and didn’t know better, that my aunt would do it all for me, and that I should focus on studying to become Emperor—ultimately, she was the primary culprit who narrowed my standing within the Imperial Palace.
Despite all that overprotection, she was off at war at the critical moment and couldn’t prevent my older brother’s rebellion.
…Now that I think about it, that really pisses me off.
“What on earth did you do to end up in Prison…Gasp!”
If she gets close, I should just bite her.
As time passed and I thought about it calmly, I realized this woman was the primary culprit who ruined me.
If it weren’t for my aunt, I would have at least played freely as a child. Regardless of the ridicule from the ministers, I might have gained some experience diving into politics.
“Pisha! What is this face of yours!”
“Huh?”
“Your eyes are annoying because they resemble that blockhead’s, but your front forehead like your sister’s, your crescent-moon eyebrows, your fair complexion, your garlic-clove nose, and your plump earlobes were so beautiful!”
What, that’s irritating.
Even if I tried to ignore the first part, the phrase “plump earlobes” was so repulsive that I unconsciously grabbed my earlobes and glanced at my aunt.
“What are you all doing! The Imperial Family’s legitimate heir is injured—you should have brought at least a healing divine stone!”
Is this woman insane, using something that expensive on a scratch wound!
A divine stone is a crystallized form of divine power, created only when the deity the household serves is at least a minor god and that deity’s domain is healing.
The quality varies depending on how great the deity backing its creation is, but even a minor god is still a god, capable of performing miracles like instantly reattaching an arm that was severed not long ago.
Thanks to this, a high-tier divine stone for healing costs so much that you’d be lucky to sell this entire Princess Palace to afford one.
No matter how much one wants to waste money on a scratch wound, common sense dictates using a healing spirit stone instead—the kind created by ordinary households that serve spirits rather than gods.
“Ah, no, Pisha doesn’t have money.”
“Even without Pisha, Auntie has money! If Auntie pays, it’ll work, right?”
“Auntie’s a pauper.”
“Pisha! Auntie’s not a pauper!”
Yes, you are. You’re a pauper.
Do you know that eighty percent of the taxes collected from your domain go to military expenses?
You could live lavishly for the rest of your life just selling the explosive artifacts you produce monthly, yet you’ve exhausted all of that and still buy new artifacts and weapons recklessly—where exactly would you find healing artifacts?
“Military expenses.”
“….”
“You’re a pauper.”
“Ugh….”
See? You have nothing to say, do you? You really are a pauper.
Your eyes are only for weapons, and the dress you’re wearing now is one that went out of fashion ages ago.
Be honest with me. You haven’t had a new dress tailored since Mother’s wedding, have you?
“That’s right. Tacky. Only wear old clothes. Go get married already.”
“Pisha!”
Kyaaah, a woman who can’t get married because she’s obsessed with weapons is throwing a tantrum!
I grabbed both her earlobes and rolled around on the bed, and my aunt made swatting motions at me, going “Ugh, ugh,” as if trying to catch me. What started as play gradually became serious as she began striking downward with real force, and my blood ran cold. Fortunately, Emily, whom I’d sent on an errand, arrived and saved me.
“Your Highness! I’ve brought back the items that were meant for Trimuti!”
“Splendid! Emily, you’re the best!”
Today Emily is swift of foot, quick of hand, and truly remarkable! Commendable!
In recognition of your efforts, I shall permit you to put these on my feet directly!
“Hurry! Hurry, hurry!”
“Yes, Your Highness. Please wait just a moment.”
With a click, the shoes were secured, and I felt the duck-shaped squeaky shoes fit snugly on my feet. I’d worried they wouldn’t fit since they were meant for that chestnut-sized thing called Trimuti, but since the material was rubber and stretched easily, there was no discomfort even if my feet were a size larger.
I bounced my feet on the bed, took a deep breath, and pressed down firmly on the floor.
Squeak.
Whoa! They really do squeak!
I don’t understand the principle, but it’s completely amazing!
“Squeak!”
Squeak!
“Squeak squeak squeak!”
Squeak squeak squeak!
They make a sound every time I jump. It’s so much fun!
Delighted by the sounds, I ran around the entire room making squeaks and squeals before returning to the bed. Then my aunt made a strange noise.
“Krhm.”
What is that? That sound is unpleasant. Make it clear whether you’re laughing or angry.
“Pisha, legitimate heir, dignity, krhm.”
“Squeak.”
“Crack.”
“Huff.”
I suppose… despite my irritation, I can tell that my aunt is absolutely doting on me.
Then I’d better make her admit it before she starts nagging me further.
I deliberately made a “squeak squeak” sound, then stomped my feet and stood before my aunt.
“Cute, yes?”
Me.
“Hehehuff.”
Just admit it already. Admit that I’m so adorable it’s infuriating!
As I continued to thrust my face at my aunt, demanding cuteness, she clutched her face and let out a “hehehuff.” In the midst of this, Emily, who had retrieved those ridiculous duck-shaped shoes, covered her mouth and made a “snort!” sound.
“Emily. Are you finding this amusing?”
“No, Your Majesty! I have committed a grave sin!”
Don’t lie. You were laughing.
I approached Emily, who had dropped to her knees, and extended the back of my hand. No matter how far the Imperial Family’s honor has fallen, the sin of laughing at Kisomalos’s sole legitimate heir is grave indeed.
“I shall personally administer your punishment!”
“I am eternally grateful for your mercy, Your Majesty!”
Yes, you should be thankful that I’m bothering to strike you myself.
I tapped Emily’s hand with my palm, counting “one, two,” and Emily, following proper palace protocol, threw herself into exaggerated dramatics, begging for mercy.
“Emily shall serve as my aunt’s attendant for the day.”
“Your grace! Truly! I am most grateful, Your Majesty!”
I hadn’t been able to bathe properly while imprisoned. Perhaps I should take a bath, even at this early hour.
I made squeaking sounds as I prepared to leave the room and solemnly declared that I would now go wash.
The attendants bustled about immediately. My aunt, dressed in those dreadfully unfashionable clothes, naturally followed behind me.
“Aunt.”
“Yes? What is it, Pisha?”
“Why are you following me?”
“To bathe together.”
What is this woman saying? My irritation only grows.
I made squeaking sounds and distanced myself from my aunt, then commanded that the healing spirit stones be brought from the Imperial Treasury while I bathed.
And with utmost sincerity, I issued one more command.
“During my bath, Kazelnu is strictly forbidden from entering.”
“Pisha!”
I protected both my ears and squeaked my way toward the bathhouse.
I hadn’t realized my aunt was such an infuriating woman.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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