Black-Haired Dad Isn’t Something You Reap - Chapter 31

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 31. Not Exactly My Precious Lover, But What Can I Do for That Person Right Now? (8)
“When an individual kills a thousand soldiers, it’s not called war. I’ve sent word to the Media Kingdom that I’ll seize Loruruje Fortress today, and told the King of Media that if he doesn’t want further advances, he should come himself with his heir. I haven’t violated a single principle of international law!”
Prisoner laughed heartily at his own pride, then left after assigning guards to our carriage, saying he needed to tour the fortress himself.
“I’ll sleep well, so please don’t wake me when it’s time to eat.”
Ah, yes. Right. Emily and the handmaidens have prepared plenty of delicious food. Sleep well. Get some good rest. Don’t forget to wash when you wake up.
As I covered Choco’s eyes with my hand, she soon fell asleep with steady, rhythmic breathing. Achilles Young Lady, for her part, left after saying she’d scout a route that wouldn’t shock me as I walked around.
I was stuck playing the role of a sun shade for Choco until lunch arrived.

✦ ✦ ✦
“I humbly receive this meal!”
“I humbly receive this meal!”
“I humbly receive this meal!”
As we spread out a mat for our lunch break and the other soldiers tore into their military rations, the fortress had been nearly reorganized. The bodies were disposed of toward Media, and the cannons that could be moved were positioned by Prisoner to blast holes through the fortress walls, all aimed at Media.
Remarkable, this Prisoner fellow. He really knows how to punch holes through walls. Does his patron deity protect miners or something? When I first met him, he was punching through prison walls with his bare hands too.
“Your Majesty, please have this. The fried shrimp is absolutely delicious.”
“No, you eat it. It’s delicious. I’m full.”
“My, Your Majesty is so kind!”
Ugh, how revolting. Does she never use the bathroom? I need to demand a refund from Prisoner while Achilles Young Lady is away. I munched on the sweet glazed lotus root that Emily had prepared to my taste and surveyed my surroundings.
Wow, a modern fortress has all its interior reinforced with steel. Our artillery shells won’t make a dent. With the distance already reducing their impact, even direct hits would just go “ping” without doing real damage.
“Your Majesty, the Media Military is approaching!”
“How many?”
“Two thousand!”
“Fire the ultra-long-range cannon. The one at Loruruje.”
“The problem is, the ballistic calculator is encrypted! If we fire blindly, we could damage civilian areas!”
“Just fire. There aren’t many.”
Prisoner, you truly have no heart. I’ve already declared war, so technically civilian casualties are permissible under international law. Still, have some consideration for ordinary people just trying to live their lives. That “not many” clearly meant keep firing until you hit something, and my chest began to tighten with unease.
“Me! Me! Me! Me! I can calculate the ballistics! Just let me try!”
“But, young noble lady, that’s hardly appropriate work for—”
“Just let her. She can do it.”
“Yes! Father is the best!”
“Call me Your Majesty.”
Fine, do as you please, both of you. Handle it yourselves. I simply cannot face this situation directly. I’ll observe from a third party’s perspective, as if watching someone else’s affair.
I averted my eyes from everything with a vacant stare and finished my entire lunch. Phew, I’m stuffed! I should ask Prisoner about returning that child.
Whoooosh! Boom!
My eardrums felt like they were tearing—it was absolutely excruciating. The fortress trembled, my vision flashed white, and my mind reeled, but the cannon fire from the fortress landed precisely in the densely packed Media Military formation. The young lady fired off several more shots in her excitement, and soon the lead vehicle of the Media Military raised a white flag and rapidly approached the fortress.
“Open the gate. Let only that vehicle through.”
At Prisoner’s command, the officers saluted and departed. Shortly after, a man with deep purple hair and a mysterious-haired child in a wheelchair appeared. What was that hair color? More lavender than purple, perhaps?
“Kneel.”
Prisoner, still munching away at his lunch without dignity, had fried breading crumbs around his mouth as he faced the King of Media. The king knelt, but since Prisoner was sitting cross-legged on a picnic mat, there was no difference in eye level.
Whether to call this fortunate for avoiding greater humiliation, or what to make of it, I couldn’t say.
“You must have been prepared from the moment you brought her here, but we will take the heir to the Media throne as our prisoner.”
“Ugh!”
Ah, so that’s why they wanted the heir brought here. Well, if you take the legitimate heir and hold them as a prisoner, you’d have the advantage in any future treaty negotiations. They wouldn’t even dare talk about revenge.
I nodded and patted my full belly while observing this so-called heir. But something felt off. Wait, if I remember correctly, didn’t Media have only three princes?
“Hey! Who do you think we are, idiots!”
The moment realization struck me, I leaped from my seat and hurled my lunch box at the heir. Long hair! A woman’s face! No matter how I looked at it, that was a woman!
“Media has only three princes! That’s a woman!”
“N-no! No, I’m not a woman! I am a prince of Media!”
“Don’t lie to me!”
I grabbed Lavender Blue by the hair and lifted her face into view. She’s a woman! Definitely a woman! What kind of man has such a delicate, pitiful beauty! Look at that line from neck to collarbone! She’s obviously a woman!
“If I may say so, she is indeed my child.”
“I’m sorry! I… I am my father’s child! I am a prince!”
Lavender Blue’s eyes glistened with tears, and she looked ready to cry at any moment. But even if she were a man by some miracle, something was deeply wrong.
“A scrawny thing who can’t even get a proper meal! How is that a prince! Even a beggar from Kishomalos would have more flesh on their bones than this!”
“Sob!”
Lavender Blue whimpered and then burst into full tears. I released her hair and, backing myself with Prisoner’s authority, kicked the King of Media repeatedly.
“So Media really does have that barbaric custom.”
“If you call it barbaric, what does that make me as a parent?”
“Barbaric?”
Even as I listened to Prisoner’s words, I didn’t stop kicking the King of Media and yanking his hair. When else would I ever get to grab the King of Media’s hair like this? Back in my previous life, when the war with Media was in full swing, I couldn’t even eat my beloved mackerel sashimi and monkfish stew. The war blocked all trade, both were fish that spoiled quickly, and on days when stress ate at me, I wanted to have a bowl of monkfish stew with a cup of sake, but there was nothing available in the market. Nothing!
With that resentment fueling me, I pulled his hair taut, and Achilles Young Lady cheered me on while Choco laughed and slapped the ground.
“I don’t know all the details, but I’ve heard that the heir who inherits Media’s power quickly becomes sickly? So they appoint one heir for the throne and another to inherit Media’s power separately. This pathetic little thing seems to be the latter.”
“That is…”
“What! If you brought us a worthless discard, we can’t even use them as a prisoner!”
So they brought us someone they’d already thrown away? They really did think we were fools!
I lost my temper and struck the Prince of Media hard, and Lavender Blue flinched before breaking into uncontrollable hiccups.
“W-worthless? But he is my own child.”
“If that were true, you wouldn’t have dumped him on us! If you’d cared even a little, you’d have pawned him off on someone else!”
Am I wrong or am I wrong, you fool! You didn’t care about him at all, so you dumped everything bad on him!
As I pressed my point relentlessly, Lavender Blue’s eyes watered again, so I shouted sharply.
“Don’t you cry! It’s infuriating!”
“H-hic, I’m s-sorry. Hic.”
This was supposed to be the condition to stop my assault and ensure Media’s precious thing wouldn’t dare act up. But now the deal was falling apart. Unless Lavender Blue was actually precious to the King of Media, the entire premise had collapsed.
Prisoner, you’re good at crushing people with nonsense. Add more conditions, quickly.
Prisoner, you’re good at using bullshit to pressure people. Add more conditions quickly.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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